Shikigami
by Erendyce
Summary: Though being an Exorcist, Allen can't bring himself to summon a shikigami to serve him, because of his deep hatred towards any kind of demons and spirits. Until he accidentally summons a powerful demon by the name of Kanda. Yullen.
1. The Sealed Altar

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property. (...)

A/N: A shikigami is a spirit summoned to serve Exorcists. As you'll see when you read, I use the word 'youkai' because it sounds well (too used to watching anime with youkai in it, and translating it with 'demon' doesn't sound good :D) though I also use other words such as demon, spirit etc...  
Also, this story came to my mind when I suddendly wondered 'what if DGM characters were real Exorcists, like in classical Japan?' and there we go.

Thanks to **Klappy** for beta-ing the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 1 – The sealed altar**

_1085, Japan_

"Pay attention, Allen."

The said boy raised his grey eyes to Komui Lee, who was presently talking to him and looking at him with a weary but kind look.

"I'm sorry," the boy merely apologized in his monotonous voice, and Komui sighed.

"Listen, I know this isn't the first time we talk about this, but I'll say it again. It's been three years since you've come here, and you've never practiced a single exorcism so far; you don't even have a single shikigami. I know you've never liked being an Exorcist, but you have to understand that if you aren't useful to the Temple of the Black Order," the man explained, "then someday I'll have to dismiss you. It is urgent for you now to summon a shikigami to serve you, and start taking exorcism requests."

"I know." came the usual answer.

"Then do something about it. That will be all for today. You may leave."

The boy nodded, and walked out. He went to the huge and beautiful garden of the Temple, the only place where he felt serene and at ease, and sat in the shadow of a white pine. Allen often came to that place when he had free time for it was peaceful and quiet, and it allowed him to lose himself deeply in thoughts.

The Temple of the Black Order. A shrine and a school at the same time. A school for Exorcists, necessary because of the countless numbers of youkai which kept harassing and tormenting the population. There were requests almost every day, and the duty of the Exorcists was to restlessly fight and destroy any source of evil. Gifted students came from across the seas to become Exorcists, and it was an honor to be received at the Temple and be given the teaching of the most renowned masters of that art.

Yet, Allen had never felt that way. He had never wished to become an Exorcist, even if he had the talent for it. Why? He didn't want to think about it. But unconsciously, images kept flashing through his head.

_Fire and smoke._

_Burning houses._

_Disemboweled corpses._

_Screams and cries._

_Shrieks of youkai attacking the village._

Allen shook his head. He didn't want to remember, but those images were carved in his mind, and even the current view of the peaceful garden in front of him couldn't distract him.

_Escape through the forest. Alone._

_Sounds of youkai chasing him._

_Run, run, run. To survive._

_A tight grip on his shoulder and a devilish laugh. A scream._

_A sudden pain on his left eye, then on his left arm._

_Death coming near._

Allen shut his eyes tight. No matter how much he wanted it, he couldn't forget. Though he was barely nine at that time, it wasn't something anyone could forget. He ran a finger on the scar on his left eye, wondering for the hundredth time how come his eye was still intact after that youkai had slashed him. And how come his arm hadn't been ripped off, instead merely bearing a long, large scar. Allen hated his two scars, they made him so different from the others and were one of the reasons he was often alone. Sometimes, he wished that the youkai had killed him. Why was he still alive?

_A sudden light behind him._

_Incantation. An Exorcist._

_Run. Again._

At that time, the nine-year-old boy's mind was too confused and panicked to realize what was happening. So he ran away. Maybe the Exorcist who had saved his life had tried to catch up to him, maybe he hadn't. It didn't matter now. After the destruction of his whole village, the injured boy had wandered through the forest before arriving in a town, exhausted, on the verge of collapsing due to the heavy loss of blood. He had passed out. Next thing he knew was that he had awakened in a house, his wounds more or less treated.

Allen smiled. Among all his memories, those were the only ones he would recall gladly. Until he was twelve, he had been brought up in that house, which was actually a place for abandoned children and orphans. The woman who took care of them was the incarnation of kindness. When people usually treated Allen as a demon because of his silver hair, that woman would simply ruffle it, saying how beautiful it was. The children called her Nara.

Even now, at the Temple, many students and Exorcists didn't want to approach him because of his appearance, always regarding him warily. Only a few Exorcists didn't give a damn about his silver hair, or his scars, and among them, there were two that Allen could really call friends. The first one, Lavi, was always cheering Allen up and defending him against the others. He was like a big brother to him. The second one, Lenalee, was Komui's sister and a very kind girl. But since those two were often sent on missions, Allen was often left alone. Actually, he didn't mind being alone; it was better than seeing the people around him averting their gazes.

Once more, Allen chuckled. It was funny how time could change people. When he was at Nara's house, he was always surrounded by many other children, and, most of all, hated being alone. They all lived together, happily. Like a family.

_Until that day. That day when he and his friends were playing in the streets and someone announced that an Exorcist from the Temple of the Black Order was coming to purify the town. Allen didn't pay attention to this news, too busy playing, until he noticed a person standing next to him, watching him with interest. Given his clothes, it wasn't difficult for Allen to tell that the person was an Exorcist._

"_This boy is gifted," the person merely said. "I'm taking him with me."_

_Of course, Allen was stunned. He gripped Nara's dress, saying that he didn't want to go. But the Exorcist insisted and to Allen's dismay, Nara accepted._

"_You'll see… you'll have a better life there. You have no future here," she said gently, a tear at the corner of her eye._

"A better life, huh?" Allen said to himself. He was now fifteen and to him, nothing of this could be called a better life. He missed his comrades with whom he used to play with, and he missed Nara who had been so kind to him. But he knew he would never be able to see them again… because they all had been killed by youkai.

Not a year after he had entered the Temple of the Black Order, he had heard that some Exorcists had been sent to that town again. But they were too late; the whole town had been reduced to nothing but ruins and corpses.

From that moment, his hatred for youkai grew deeper and fiercer. It was ironic how he could forgive the monsters for destroying his own village and killing his true family, but there was no way he could forgive them for killing his family a second time. And though exorcism was a way to get rid of youkai, he didn't want to have anything to do with anything related to youkai. Thus, he didn't like exorcism.

Yet, he also knew that his hatred for youkai was partly absurd since not every youkai was evil. Many of them were even useful to humans, shikigami for example. But that didn't prevent him from feeling resentful against all the youkai he met, and the simple thought of one serving him made him feel almost… disgusted. Youkai were the reason why he had lost his family twice.

A cool breeze blew on Allen's face as he sat under the white pine. Komui's words came back to him: he had to find a shikigami and start practicing exorcisms; otherwise he would have to leave. Funny, Allen thought. Leaving wasn't a bad idea, but where would he go afterwards?

"Allen!" A voice called him out.

The silver-haired boy raised his eyes and a smile appeared on his lips.

"Lavi! Lenalee!" he answered back as he stood up and went to greet his two friends.

"Always at the same spot, Allen? What were you meditating on this time?" Lavi asked, patting Allen's shoulder.

"Nothing, really."

"Geez, Allen… when will you stop rotting here and go out with us? You know, it's pretty funny to exorcise spirits and youkai!"

"Yes, when the requester is a fine woman…" Lenalee added.

"Haha, what are you talking about, Lenalee?" Lavi answered, a comical sweat drop appearing by the side of his head. "Anyway, when do you intend to summon a shikigami, Allen?"

Allen sighed. His friends didn't know about his hatred for youkai since he had never told them.

"I don't know, but soon enough, I suppose. Don't have much choice anyway," he muttered.

"Don't pull that face! You'll see, when you have one, it will be much more fun!"

"Lavi, exorcism isn't a game," Lenalee reprimanded the enthusiastic red-haired. "Anyway, Brother told me you should hurry up and start filling requests if you don't want to—"

"Get thrown out of the Temple?" Allen finished. "Yes, I know."

"For real?" Lavi asked. "Damn, then you seriously have to get to work! Want me to accompany you? You should be able to find a decent shikigami in the forest."

"No. It's ok, Lavi. I'll go by myself," Allen answered.

"You sure? I can help you if you want."

"No, it's fine," the boy repeated.

"Hm… ok then. Anyway, it's lunch time. You're coming with us?"

"Sure," Allen replied.

As they headed back inside, they crossed paths with several people who simply walked away when they saw Allen – as usual. Lavi stuck his tongue out at them.

"Idiots," he merely said.

"It's ok, Lavi," Allen said, chuckling. "I'm used to it."

"Yeah, but I'm not. Someday, they'll have to learn the difference between a human and a youkai. Lame Exorcists."

"I tried to talk to my brother about it, but he said he can't really do anything about it. People believe what they want to believe," Lenalee shook her head apologetically.

"Don't bother about it," Allen reassured her.

"Anyway, to get back to the topic, if you want to go to the forest, better go at night. You'll have more chance to get a nice shikigami," the girl advised him.

"Yes, I know. I happen to learn my lessons at school, you know?" Allen replied, smiling.

"Haha! Excuse me, Allen. I tend to forget that you're not like Lavi!" Lenalee said cheerfully.

"Hey, hey… I'm not that bad, you know…" Lavi pouted.

All three of them laughed, and Allen's heart lightened a bit.

* * *

The moon was full and the sky was clear of any cloud that night, a perfect night for spirits to appear. Allen sighed heavily. Well, he wasn't going to complain about having such a nice weather, but he didn't really feel motivated to search for a shikigami. No choice, he repeated to himself.

He got out of the school, nodding at the guards at the entrance as he passed, and headed for the forest right in front of him. The forest wasn't dark, because of the many little harmless and glowing youkai floating around him like fireflies. Allen followed the main path, intending to go to a pond nearby where he could summon a water shikigami. Well, he had never practiced before, so the result could be disappointing. But at least, Komui would stop bothering him. In the trees surrounding him, he could hear sounds of the youkai who lived in the forest but it didn't worry him, since all the spirits in that area were simply peaceful creatures.

After about half an hour of walking, Allen started getting worried as he didn't see any pond, though he was certain he wasn't lost.

"I should go back," he muttered to himself. He'd ask Lavi to come with him next time, just to make sure. For tonight, it was over.

As he was about to go back though, a strange light caught his attention in the middle of the trees. At first, he thought it was simply another wandering youkai in the forest. But the light strangely intrigued him, so he decided to go and see, plainly out of curiosity.

He left the main road and headed for the light. A tree branch scraped against his cheek as he walked, but he simply wiped the few drops of blood with a hand. What he saw as he reached said light, however, rendered him speechless. He positively knew that there was no clearing around there. So why was there one right here, in front of him?

In the middle of the clearing, an altar was erected, lit by the moonlight. It was impossible! The only altar in the area was the one in the shrine of the Temple; there was no other.

The stone of the altar reflected the light of the full moon, and it seemed to Allen that it was glowing with strange shades of silver. He was simply captivated by the sight.

Allen rubbed his eyes, wondering if it wasn't some kind of hallucination, then decided to go near the altar. It was a very small one, and Allen noticed as he walked closer that there were at least a dozen of seals affixed on it. This was getting even weirder. Why were there seals on an altar? What was sealed?

Allen approached even closer to read what was written on the seals. Useless. The scriptures were written in a language unknown to him. What to do now? Leave? Maybe he could go back to the temple and fetch Lavi and Lenalee. For some unknown reason however, he felt that if he left, he wouldn't be able to find the altar again. Something was telling him to stay.

The silver-haired boy tried to examine the altar itself, but there was nothing on it which could have helped him know its purpose. A thought crossed his mind: he could perhaps try and undo the seals, but how? He'd never practiced anything like that before, he would certainly fail. And if he ever managed to break them, what if an evil spirit came out of the altar? No, that was ridiculous. If an evil spirit was truly sleeping there, the seals would be powerful enough to prevent someone at the level of Allen from breaking them.

Again, the boy found himself staring at the glowing stone, hypnotized by the pulsing light. Until a soft breeze suddenly blew on his face and a voice which seemed to come with the breeze rose, like a murmur:

"_Free me."_

Allen jumped, and then looked around him. No one else was there, so where did the voice come from? He shook his head. He was imagining things. His attention was brought back to the altar. He was confused. What to do? If he left and couldn't find the altar again later, he would be taken for a fool, and he didn't need that. Allen sighed, and then put a hand on the stone.

Immediately, a violent light dazzled him, forcing him to shut his eyes tight as he stepped back. When he opened them again, the light had disappeared, but the seals were starting to vanish as well, one by one. Allen gasped. What was happening? Was he supposed to run away? But his legs either wouldn't move or weren't able to move, he didn't know. Allen wanted to see, to know; he felt irresistibly attracted by the altar, though he couldn't tell why.

The last seal disappeared, and the stone started cracking. A new light came out of the stone and rose in the air, slowly taking a human shape. Allen blinked several times. He was dreaming, that was the only explanation. In front of him, the light faded, giving Allen a full view of what was in front of him.

A man – no, a youkai – was floating in front of him, staring at him with piercing and dark blue eyes. No word could come out of Allen's mouth. The man – no, youkai! – was simply gorgeous. The moon cast its rays on the dark figure, dressed in a black kimono, as black as his long, floating hair which framed his handsome features.

Allen could simply gaze at the view, not knowing what else to do. He didn't even step back when the man – youkai, for heaven's sake! – slowly landed on his feet right in front of Allen, his eyes still locked on the boy in a cold stare. To Allen, it was impossible that the creature was a youkai; it was too… beautiful to be a youkai. Yet, no human being could possibly appear from an altar. After what seemed an eternity to him, the youkai finally spoke:

"Aren't you going to take me at your service?" he asked coldly.

That brought Allen back to reality.

"W-What are you talking about?" he asked, too dumbfounded. The question seemed to annoy the other.

"You freed me. Now you either give me back my powers and I'll bond to you, or you seal me again."

"I… freed you? Wait, what do you mean? I didn't do anything! And I don't know how to seal you!"

"Che. Your blood freed me. And if you can't seal me, then give me back my powers." The youkai almost demanded.

"My… blood?" Allen was getting more and more confused. Then he looked at his hand with which he had touched the stone. It was the hand he had used to wipe the blood from his scratch off, and there were traces of the crimson liquid on it. He raised his eyes at the youkai.

"What are you?" he asked.

"My name is Kanda," the other replied.

"Then… how do I give you back your powers?" What was he saying? He wanted to give powers to a youkai? To a creature he was supposed to loathe? But… there was something emanating from that one which simply fascinated Allen.

"Make me your shikigami. It's the only way," Kanda answered dryly.

"My shikigami…" Allen murmured. He hadn't expected that at all, but after all, why not? Or was this some kind of trap? The boy looked at Kanda; the latter wasn't visibly very happy about becoming his shikigami, so maybe it was true. Maybe the only way for him to recover his powers was to bond to Allen.

No. There was something wrong. Shikigamis weren't supposed to be obtained like that.

_But I want this one._

No, certainly not. Allen despised youkai, and even if shikigamis served humans, they were still youkai to him.

_He's beautiful._

Indeed, he was. Allen had seen many of the other Exorcists' shikigamis and among them, only two or three could pretend to be that… impressing. But Allen had been taught that youkai could sometimes disguise their selves to trick humans.

_There's nothing for me to lose._

If Kanda had told him the truth, then Allen would have a shikigami, and Komui would be satisfied.

The boy didn't think any further. With his hand, he traced a seal in the air and chanted. As he did so, he felt an invisible link drawing between him and the youkai, and the feeling wasn't unpleasant at all, contrary to what he had thought. There was something else; an enormous amount of power from nowhere was flowing into Kanda's body, which simply stunned Allen. He had no idea the youkai was that powerful! The boy suddenly panicked. There was no way he could control such a huge amount of spiritual energy! He had to stop right there before it was too late. He looked at Kanda, who was receiving his powers with obvious satisfaction, and again, the sight purely and simply prevented Allen from stopping. Realizing his growing obsession, the boy mentally kicked himself, and promised himself not to let that youkai take over him. He would use Kanda to fill the requests he would be given, and that would be all. No further contact. No friendly bonds like Lavi or Lenalee had with their own shikigamis. Nothing.

He was done chanting. And Kanda was now his shikigami. Allen almost felt overwhelmed by the powerful aura coming from him; the difference between their spiritual energies was simply too huge. Kanda merely stared at Allen for a moment before speaking:

"I can't believe I have to be the shikigami of such a weak Exorcist," he said with contempt.

Allen opened his eyes wide. What the hell had he gotten himself into?

* * *

Screw my exams. I know I said I wouldn't post anything before exams were over, but I keep having this story in my head and I can't concentrate on studies because of stupid Yullen! No, just kidding, Yullen is my drug... So writing fictions helps me study better, in a way, right? ^^°  
Anyway, since this is my first time at AU, be kind enough to tell me whether this story is worth updating or no, because I won't spend time on it if it isn't.


	2. Black and White

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is Hoshino Katsura's property... ahem... maybe not for long.

A/N: Since I suck terribly at Japanese vocabulary, I use 'futon' for their mattress though I believe this isn't how they were called at the 11th century... if someone knows please let me know too. As well as the name of the dress they wear, you know, like in Shonen Onmyouji. Otherwise I'll call it a dress...  
Oh yeah, and several people told me the plot reminds them of Tactics. I suppose I'll have to go watch that series haha ^^°

Thanks to **Klappy** for beta-ing the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 2– Black and White**

Allen walked out of the forest, followed by his newly acquired shikigami. It was around midnight, so the boy would simply go sleep for now and would see Komui the day after to tell him he was ready to start taking requests. Allen suddenly stopped walking and turned to Kanda:

"Why can't I feel any spiritual energy from you now?" he asked.

"Obviously because I'm repressing it, otherwise you wouldn't be able to stand it, brat," Kanda replied with disdain.

Allen was used to being talked as if he was inferior to everyone, he was used to being treated like a weak and useless Exorcist, but for some reason, the words coming from the shikigami's mouth irritated him more than usual.

"If I'm not to your convenience, then why the hell did you ask to become my shikigami?" Allen asked dryly.

"No choice," was Kanda's mere reply.

The silver-haired boy was about to ask why, but decided against it. He didn't care. He didn't want to know about that youkai's life; the less contact he had with those monsters, the better. After all, Allen wasn't very fond of having a youkai serving him, so he wasn't going to blame Kanda for disliking it either. The boy resumed walking silently to the Temple.

There were an abnormal number of people in front of the gate, and thanks to the light of the torches some were holding, Allen immediately recognized Komui and several teachers shouting orders here and there. As soon as Komui saw him, he ran to him but stopped dead as he saw Kanda.

"Allen! You're fine, I'm relieved. Who is it?" Komui asked suspiciously.

"My new shikigami. You wanted me to find one, and I did," Allen answered, slightly worried by the uneasy atmosphere. "What's going on here?"

"Didn't you feel it? There's been a sudden burst of spiritual energy not long ago, enough to wake everyone up, and we're trying to find the cause of it. Nothing in the area should be powerful enough to emit so much energy. You didn't see anything abnormal in the forest?"

"Ah, well… as for that…" Allen scratched his cheek, embarrassed.

"Che. Lame Exorcists," Kanda snapped with his sharp voice, surprising Komui.

"Excuse me?" he asked the youkai, visibly upset.

"Wait, wait!" Allen intervened. "The reason of the surge of energy you felt earlier is Kanda. When I…"

"Kanda? That's your shikigami's name?" Komui cut him abruptly.

"Well, yes…"

Komui stared at Kanda, incredulous. He addressed the demon:

"Is it true?"

"Che, of course it is. Seems like you know who I am, unlike this brat," Kanda answered with a smirk.

Hearing that, several teachers gasped and rushed at him to surround him while Komui pulled Allen by the arm and stepped back.

"Bring that youkai in the Sealing Room and keep an eye on it," Komui ordered the teachers.

"W-Wait! What are you doing?" Allen asked, unable to understand what was going on.

"Come with me, Allen." The man merely said.

They went to Komui's working room, and took seat around the low table. Then Komui started speaking in his most serious tone:

"Allen, I don't know where this is going, but if that youkai is really what he claims to be, then we may be in trouble. To be honest, I personally think that there is no reason to panic, but I had to put it in the Sealing Room just in case."

"But why—"

"Let me finish. I'll tell you a story. Few people know about it, and to most of them, it's a legend. There are even several versions of the story, but here is the one I was told. Have you ever heard about the Sealed Altar?"

Allen shook his head.

"Well, I'll make the story short," Komui paused briefly before continuing, "centuries ago, there was a demon feared through the whole country because it kept wandering from villages to villages and from towns to towns, destroying everything on its way and leaving only desolation and countless corpses behind it. One day, a monk whose name was unknown appeared. He fought the demon, but ended up deadly injured. So he gathered what was left of his powers, and managed to seal the demon in an altar. It is also said that the monk put a curse on the demon to prevent him from harming people any further. According to the legend, the demon's powers were taken away and the only way to recover them was to serve an Exorcist. Furthermore, only people sharing the same blood as the monk – that is to say his relatives and their descendants – would be able to see the altar and break the seals. Also, the altar can only be found every full moon. And tonight is a full moon."

Komui paused, giving Allen time to assimilate what he had just told him. The boy was immobile, his eyes staring at nothing in particular. Komui resumed:

"You get my point. The name of that demon is Kanda."

Allen closed his eyes and took a deep breath in, then opened them again:

"I found a clearing in the forest which I'm pretty sure have never existed. And Kanda told me he had no choice but to become my shikigami… it does match with your story," he murmured. After a pause, he asked Komui, "Then, what you're trying to tell me is that my shikigami is actually a powerful ancient demon doomed to serve under me?"

"I suppose so. If the story is true, that is."

"What do I do then?"

"Well, as long as it's your shikigami, it can't use its powers to harm humans, so you can't release it. We'll simply keep it in the sealing room. I'm sorry but you'll have to go find another shikigami, Allen," Komui answered with a weak smile.

Allen's head was a mess. Kanda was a demon who had massacred countless people? Memories of his past suddenly came back to him, hurtful memories. Fine, Allen would let that demon rot here and find another one. However, the simple thought of having to find a new shikigami made him feel more than reluctant. He despised youkai, and bonding with one already made him feel sick, so there was no way he was going to take another of those monsters at his service.

There was something else. Something that Allen unconsciously repressed because it scared him. An inexplicable attraction to the power he had felt in the forest, Kanda's power. It was something which drew him unwillingly to that venomously gorgeous demon.

_Gorgeous._

They had hardly met for an hour at most, and Allen was already unable to get rid of his sudden obsession for the demon. It was precisely that fascination for that demon which scared Allen. Undoubtedly, he hated Kanda, but at the same time, there was something_enticing_about him. Like a spider luring its prey to its web to devour it.

_I don't have anything to lose._Allen repeated to himself.

"Komui, I think I will be fine with Kanda. You said it after all, shikigami aren't supposed to use their powers to harm humans. And since he's now a shikigami, he'll have to follow the same rule. I don't think there's any need to keep him locked."

"I don't either, Allen," the older man nodded. "But you never know what could happen, and before everything has been cleared, I don't want to take any risk. And there's also the problem of the difference between your spiritual energies. I'm sure you've noticed, but you and your shikigami aren't at the same level at all; I daresay that some of our teachers don't match its level either. You managed to make Kanda your shikigami because he wanted it, but under normal circumstances, you'd have been swallowed by him. It's dangerous for you; you may not be able to handle it."

"I will," Allen declared firmly. "Please let me try."

Allen's tone truly surprised Komui. He had never seen so much determination in the boy's eyes until now, and after a few seconds of silence, he smiled.

"Ok, I give up. Since you've never asked me anything like this and seem to be so sure of yourself, I'm willing to let you try. Then you'll start tomorrow?"

Allen nodded.

"Fine. You should go sleep now, it's getting really late," Komui advised him.

"What about Kanda?" Allen asked, making the other man sigh.

"Don't worry about that. I'll go talk to your shikigami now, and it'll be released," he answered.

On that night, Allen barely slept because his mind was too busy registering everything that had happened; also because Lavi and Lenalee burst into his room too early the following morning for his own liking.

"Allen! You're awake? Everyone around us is saying that you… oh my god, it's true," Lavi stopped dead when he saw the youkai standing next to a futon where a still half-asleep Allen was slowly trying to wake up.

"Lavi… what are you doing in my room at this hour…" the silver-haired boy managed to say between two yawns. "Oh, you're here too, Lenalee. Good morning."

"Who cares about 'good morning'?" Lavi went on as he pointed a finger at Kanda. "Allen, is this really the demon Kanda?" he asked with excitement, he was almost jumping on the spot.

"Lavi, calm down," Lenalee patted Lavi's shoulder. "Sorry for the intrusion, Allen. We were just too curious about the rumors we heard this morning," she added, smiling.

Allen, still too asleep to realize what his friends were telling him, rubbed his eyes and yawned again. The next thing he saw was Kanda glaring at the two intruders then going out of the room, saying as he walked past them:

"Che. Annoying brats."

The room went silent for a few seconds after Kanda left, then Lavi asked again:

"So, is he the real thing?"

"I suppose, yes…" Allen answered sleepily.

"Damn, I can't believe it. You've got the blood of the monk, that's just too… incredible."

"How come you know about it? Komui told me very few people heard about the story."

"Well, I read a lot, you know. And since Panda seems to like me, he lends me many old scrolls for my free time."

"Panda? You mean the old man who's in charge of the library?" Allen asked.

"Yeah, him. Anyway, back to the topic. Aren't you kind of scared?"

"About what?"

"Well, if Kanda is really the demon described in the books, he may try to kill you, or tear your limbs apart, or slice your throat, or—"

"Lavi! Stop saying such things! Poor Allen just woke up, don't spoil his morning!" Lenalee scolded the red-haired Exorcist.

"Too late, Lenalee. It's already spoiled. Well, I might as well get up and have something to eat," Allen replied grumpily.

"We're going with you then. Oh yes, my brother said that you were to come to his working room as soon as you are done so he can give you your first request!" Lenalee said proudly. "I'm glad you're finally starting your job!"

"Yeah… thanks Lenalee," the silver-haired boy answered, visibly not in the mood to do any job, but well, it's not like he had much choice. "Would you mind waiting for me outside while I'm getting dressed?"

"Oh, sure Allen!"

As Allen was done dressing, he got out only to find Lavi and Lenalee silently standing in front of his room, busy gazing at the ground.

"What are you d—" the boy started, but was interrupted by a voice he was beginning to dislike more and more.

"Che, finally out, Moyashi."

Allen jumped, and then turned his head to see Kanda leaning against the wall, looking at him.

"What did you call me?" Allen asked slowly.

"Moyashi. Because you're so small I could accidentally step on you while walking," Kanda answered casually.

"Y-You're supposed to serve me, not insult me!" Allen snapped back, his cheeks turning red. "Lenalee! Lavi! Let's go!" he called the two others who nodded and hurriedly followed him. Unfortunately, Kanda followed as well, which irritated Allen even more.

"Why are you following me?" he asked, pissed off.

"I'm your shikigami, I'm supposed to follow you," the other merely replied.

"Why the hell did I have to summon you among all the youkai in the world?" the boy muttered to himself.

"Don't worry. We sympathize with you," Lavi patted his back. "You'll find some others later," he added in a whisper.

"Hell no!" Allen replied immediately, maybe more violently than what he had wanted.

"Why not?" Lenalee asked, curious.

"Because… because one is enough for me! I can't handle more!" Allen lied. Partly, that is.

"Oh, well, if you say so…"

* * *

Allen was walking through the streets of a town nearby the Temple for his request. Since it was his first one, Komui had insisted on giving him something easy, to train him. Of course Allen had already trained a lot at school, but training and practicing real exorcism weren't the same things. As for now, he had been asked to purify a newly built house because its owner feared that some spirits may want to live in that house as well.

As Allen was walking, people on his way kept glancing at him, and though the boy knew it was because of his hair and the scar on his eye, he also suspected that Kanda had something to do with it. Allen wouldn't admit it, but no matter how much he couldn't stand the youkai, the latter was undeniably handsome, and the two of them formed a strange pair. One with silver hair in a white and blue dress, the other with long, dark hair and dressed in all black, almost like a living shadow. Allen heard Kanda say behind him:

"Foolish humans. I wish I could tear their eyes out."

Allen didn't react, because he was more or less thinking the same thing, but some people around him who had heard Kanda hurried away.

They finally arrived at the house where the owner welcomed them warmly and invited them inside.

"I'll be in the garden if you need something," he said before leaving.

Allen sighed. He felt slightly nervous since it was his first time and he didn't want to mess up. He heard Kanda walking out of the room.

"Where are you going?" he asked his shikigami sharply.

"You don't need me for this. There are only small fries here. Even you can purify it without help," the other replied as coldly.

Allen bit his lip. He had to calm down and focus on the exorcism, not on that demon trash which was supposed to be his shikigami. He concentrated, trying to feel any source of spiritual energy in the house, and after a minute, found that indeed, there were only a few rather weak youkai.

He spent his next fifteen minutes purifying the place with seals and incantations, then let out a sigh of relief when he was done. He went out of the house to inform the owner that everything was fine now, but bumped into Kanda who was waiting outside.

"That was slow," was the shikigami's only comment.

Allen ignored him, as the owner was coming back.

"It's done," Allen told the man.

"Oh, that was quick!" the man answered, pleased. He didn't notice Kanda throwing him a disdainful glance. "Thank you very much. Here's the payment."

"It's my duty as an Exorcist," Allen replied, smiling.

The boy took the payment then headed back for the Temple, his first request was done. Yet he didn't feel particularly happy. He didn't want to be an Exorcist, and that fact wouldn't change.

* * *

"Congratulations for filling your first request, Allen!" Lenalee ruffled his hair.

"It-it was nothing difficult…" Allen replied, embarassed.

"Well, you didn't expect Komui to send you on a demon hunt for your first request, right?" Lavi asked teasingly. "Though if that had been the case, your shikigami could have helped you."

"Don't talk about him, please," Allen muttered. Lavi laughed.

"I understand," Lenalee said. "He looks so cold it's scary. Where is he now?"

"Probably outside. I don't care where he is," Allen answered.

"You should take another shikigami, you know," the girl advised. "You won't be able to work properly otherwise."

"No, I don't want to," Allen replied immediately.

Lenalee looked at him strangely.

"Well, I suppose it's up to you, as long as you manage to fill requests. Anyway, we'll let you rest for now, ok?"

"Thank you, Lenalee," the silver-haired boy answered.

"See you later then!" Both Lavi and Lenalee took their leave.

Allen decided to go rest at his usual spot, in the large garden, under his favorite white pine. He leant his back against the trunk and closed his eyes, trying to empty his mind. For several minutes, the peaceful atmosphere managed to relax him and he let out a small sigh, is, until his thoughts drifted back to less pleasant subjects.

Kanda troubled him. Because of him, Allen was feeling torn in two; one part of him feared the demon, despised him and rejected the bond between them while the other part of him felt irresistibly attracted to everything Kanda embodied: power, strength, magnificence. Allen shook his head. Kanda had become his shikigami for not even a full day and his mind was already that disoriented. Maybe Komui was right, maybe Kanda was too much for Allen to handle. However, he couldn't bear the mere thought of using a shikigami other than Kanda. They had formed a bond, and it seemed to Allen that the bond was so strong that all his spiritual energy had been used in it, forbidding him from sharing it with any other creature but Kanda.

Allen sighed once more.

"Che, what's with all those sighs?" A voice made him jump.

"Kanda! Since when were you here?" Allen asked, quite irritated.

"Since long enough to wonder what was making a moyashi sigh like that every two minutes."

"Stop calling me a moyashi! I've got a name and it's Allen!"

"I don't care about the name of a weak Exorcist who'd die soon enough if left alone," Kanda replied, not caring about the hurt look in the boy's silver eyes.

"Then I'll ask Komui to send me on a demon hunt so you can let me die there, and everyone will be happy," he snapped.

"I can't do that."

"Why?"

"I'd lose all my powers if you were to die, brat," Kanda answered, visibly annoyed.

"What a pity, really… It almost makes me want to commit suicide," Allen went on sarcastically.

"You talk about throwing your life away pretty easily, Moyashi. Do you feel that desperate by your own powerlessness?" the demon asked with a smirk.

"Don't call me that. And I don't give a damn about being weak, because I've never wished to become an Exorcist!" Allen felt his temper rising.

That last sentence made Kanda raise an eyebrow.

"Then why are you here?" he asked.

"I was taken here because I am gifted, but I've never wanted it! I—" Allen stopped._I wish I had stayed with Nara and the others and died with them!_But that was none of Kanda's concern, so he kept silent.

"Damn, I'm really unlucky. Among all the descendants of that stupid monk, it had to be a shrimp unable to do anything but whine," the youkai said with obvious contempt.

"You don't understand… you can't understand! How could you anyway? You're just a monster who killed people like they were nothing!" Allen lost control. The memories of his village burning and its inhabitants massacred reminded him of how much his hatred for youkai was strong, and tears of anger started appearing at the corner of his eyes.

"Interesting. The moyashi is upset. What is it? Are you going to hate me because of what I did before?" Kanda asked. "Or maybe because you suffered something similar? Let me guess, were some acquaintances of yours killed by demons?" he insisted, visibly enjoying the look of horror on Allen's face.

"Enough!" Allen almost shouted as he punched the youkai in front of him. He tried to, at least; Kanda easily blocked the boy's fist with one hand. He leant towards Allen and grabbed his chin with his other hand, wiping the few tears falling from the boy's cheek with his thumb. Their faces were only a few inches apart, and Allen stared directly into the youkai dark blue eyes, not flinching.

"My, my. The moyashi actually has some guts to dare attack me," Kanda said with a smirk.

Allen should have felt disgusted because a youkai was touching him, but right now that was the least of his problems. Right now, he was busy trying not to get swallowed by those two dark pools watching him intently. Again, there was that feeling of being drawn to that man – no, youkai – the lack of will to resist and the desire to feel more of his power. Realizing his situation, Allen tried to step back, but Kanda wouldn't let go.

"You may not be that uninteresting after all," he commented.

Allen was at loss for words. Anger was flowing within him, but he was unable to do anything, as if paralyzed by Kanda. Then he noticed something else. Being that close to each other, Allen could smell Kanda's scent, the same scent of the fresh and perfumed forest where he had met Kanda for the first time. Allen found himself breathing in the sweet fragrance, and once more, his senses betrayed his common sense which ordered him to withdraw at once. He felt his cheeks reddening and his heartbeat increasing from anger. Or was it only anger? The closeness with such a handsome creature was somehow dizzying.

"So captivated by me that you can't even say anything anymore?" Kanda's voice brought Allen back to reality. The youkai was smirking.

The boy slapped Kanda's hand away and stepped back, glaring at him.

"You disgust me. You and all of your kind. I hate youkai, they took everything from me. Everything."

"I suppose I guessed right, then," Kanda merely replied, unaffected by Allen's hateful tone.

The boy chose not to add anything and ran back inside, to his room. There, he threw himself on his futon and buried his face in the blanket, allowing himself to let out silent sobs.

On the other side of the door, a dark-haired youkai was leaning against the wall, arms crossed.

"Che, humans are such fragile creatures."

* * *

Ok so now I'd like to tell you all something: YOU TOTALLY WIN. I mean, at first I wasn't sure at all that this story would be something cool, and then... I received so many reviews/fav/alerts that I thought I was going to faint. Seriously, I was like 'omfg!' So now I've got more or less the global plot in mind so please keep supporting me like this, you don't know how much it boosts my motivation to study for my exams! (really) The only problem now is that I fear to disappoint you in further chapters -_- *stress, stress* but well, I'll do my best :] Don't hesitate to tell me what you think should be changed here!  
Oh and btw, I've looked on the web to know why DGM is on a freaking hiatus and found out that 2 rumors are spreading: 1st one is that our dear Hoshino may be sued for plagiarism (...) and 2nd one is because of her health. So anyone actually has positive sources about that? Because... how to put this... I want DGM to be baaaack! T_T  
And once again, you all ROCK.


	3. Bond

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is Hoshino Katsura's property.

A/N: Ok, so since some people asked about Allen and Kanda's clothes, and since I absolutely suck at describing clothes in the middle of a story, also after having spent 30 minutes on google to try and find the name of Allen's dress, I finally decided that the easiest was to draw them. (Lame, I know). You'll find in my profile the link to the rough sketch I made. Quality is bad but it's only so you can have a more or less good idea about how they look like. (Freely inspired from Shonen Onmyouji lol) Since I didn't find the name of the outer tunic Allen wears over his kimono (why couldn't I find it? I mean, all anime char wear that garment!), I decided to simply call it the outer tunic (...) The blue pants is a hakama, and Kanda's wearing a black one. Their kimonos are worn inside the hakama. I think that's all.

Anyway, it's not like I'm going to focus on their clothes throughout the whole story, but some of you asked for more details.

Thanks to **Klappy** for beta-ing the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 3 – Bond**

Allen slowly opened his eyes; he remembered falling asleep after coming back to his room. He also remembered the heated discussion he had had with his shikigami in the garden, and immediately, a feeling of irritation started rising in him, but the boy quickly dismissed it. He wasn't going to let himself get affected so much by the words of a mere demon, after all.

The next thing he noticed was that someone had pulled the blanket over him. Strange, no one usually entered his room. Then a soft scent came to his nose, a forest scent. Allen turned his head to the side and saw Kanda sitting next to him, arms and legs crossed, looking at him with his piercing eyes. He couldn't have… no, the mere thought of Kanda actually caring about Allen catching a cold was laughable enough. The boy quickly sat up and addressed the demon:

"Get out," he said dryly.

"Che, barely awoken and already in a bad mood," Kanda merely replied.

"I said, get out."

In less than a second, Kanda grabbed Allen by the collar and roughly pinned him on the futon, which made the boy gasp under the shock. They glared at each other, their faces uncomfortably too close for Allen. Long strands of dark hair fell on both sides of his head, brushing his blushing cheeks.

"Now listen to me. I'm your shikigami because I had no other choice, but don't you dare think it means that I'm your dog," he said icily. "If you don't watch that mouth of yours, I may do some very unpleasant things."

"Like what? You can't harm humans," Allen replied defiantly.

"Wrong. I can't use my powers to harm humans, but I don't particularly need them to kill the weaklings of your kind."

"You said you'd lose your powers if I were to die."

"I didn't mean you, brat. But for example, those two friends of yours would be of no match against me," Kanda leant closer and whispered at Allen's ear: "You don't know what could happen, but maybe you'd have to go look for their scattered remains around the Temple someday…"

Chills ran through Allen's body as his eyes widened in horror. Then he violently pushed Kanda away and stood up, shaking out of anger:

"Don't lay a single finger on them! If you do, the whole Temple will be there to overpower you, and I'll personally make sure you'll suffer enough to atone for everything you did, and even more!"

"You think you'd be able to harm me? Don't joke. You're barely better than a piece of trash, and so are all the Exorcists in this temple. I could reduce all of you to ashes in an instant if I wanted to."

"But you can't use your powers against humans since you're my shikigami."

For a second, Allen thought he had won the argument since Kanda didn't reply and instead, stood up and dusted the bottom of his black hakama off before turning his back to the boy. Allen immediately got to his feet too and went on:

"Don't speak about killing my friends anym—" but Allen was cut as his shikigami did something absolutely unexpected: he turned round and grabbed Allen's chin with one hand, pulling their faces closer and said:

"Just kidding."

"What?" Allen asked, surprised by those words.

"I don't give a damn about your comrades here; it'd be too boring to kill them. I'd rather go rip off the head of some interesting demons than waste my time with small fries like you."

Allen was at loss for words. What was that youkai's problem? Not a minute ago, he was talking about dismembering Lavi and Lenalee, and now he was saying it'd be too boring?

"You demons make me sick…" Allen murmured. "Just get your hand off me," he added as he slapped Kanda's hand away.

"I'd be curious to know why you hate youkai so much," Kanda said, almost amused.

"That is none of your business. Anyway, why did you start talking about killing my friends if you didn't really intend to?" Allen asked coldly.

"Why? Because making you angry entertains me, obviously," Kanda replied with a smirk. "You're a brat with so little spiritual energy it makes me want to cry, but you can get pretty violent when hit at the right spots. At least you're not as boring as what I formerly thought."

"You…" Allen didn't know what to answer. This youkai was playing with his nerves, he knew it, but he didn't want to give Kanda the satisfaction of playing his game any further.

They were interrupted by a voice coming from the other side of the door:

"Allen? You're in here? Can we come in?" Lavi asked before sliding open the door.

"Lavi, you could at least wait for Allen's answer…" Lenalee said as both of them entered anyway.

"Hey! Allen… oh, your shikigami is here too," Lavi's cheerful face fell at once, replaced by a respectful – uneasy? – one.

Kanda snorted. Obviously, the two Exorcists were impressed by him and felt very uncomfortable in his presence.

"What is it?" Allen tried to ask as coolly as possible.

"Well, we didn't see you for the whole afternoon and you weren't in the garden so we wanted to know if everything's ok," Lavi explained carefully.

"Yes, everything's fine," the boy replied with a smile.

"Really? Well, do you want to go train with us? I know you've come back from a request, but since you said it wasn't very exhausting, we thought you could come with us. What do you think?"

"Train? Oh, ok. I'm coming then," Allen said as he walked to the door. Kanda started following, but the boy stopped him:

"It's only training. I don't need you for that. Even someone of my level can handle it without help," he said, a hint of sarcasm in his tone.

"I'm not going to help you, Moyashi. I'm just curious to see how well you train," Kanda replied equally.

Allen sighed, and then shook his head.

"Never mind. Let's go, Lenalee, Lavi."

As they were heading for the training grounds, they noticed that several people avoided them or suddenly changed direction so as not to cross path with them.

"Hmm, now I kinda feel like they're going to think that Lenalee and I are some kind of freaks too because we keep hanging out with you, Allen," Lavi commented sullenly.

"You sounded like Allen is a freak," Lenalee reproached him.

"No! Not at all! I just meant—"

"Don't worry, I don't mind it," the boy assured him, laughing.

"Well… I didn't really mean it that way, but hey, it's not necessarily a bad thing. I'd love to have a scar like yours and silver hair. They give you an awesome look!" Lavi said cheerfully, which he almost immediately regretted when he heard Allen's sad tone as he replied:

"You don't know what you're asking for, Lavi."

"Lavi, stop saying things like that! It obviously doesn't make Allen happy at all!" Lenalee scolded the red-haired again. "Allen, we're sorry if we've hurt you," she added, looking worried.

"Yeah, sorry Allen," Lavi apologized too.

"Don't worry. I know you've never meant to hurt me or anything," Allen replied with a smile.

There was a few seconds of silence, before Lavi spoke again:

"Anyway, you've never told us how you got this scar."

The boy stiffened and gazed at the ground, not answering. Seeing that, Lenalee kicked Lavi.

"Lavi, for heaven's sake, how clumsy can you be? Just don't open your mouth without thinking first! Allen, we're very sorry!" she apologized deeply.

"No, no, I assure you it's ok!" Allen quickly replied, rather embarrassed. "Lavi, don't worry, it's nothing! Anyway, don't think about it anymore and let's just go train," he addressed the red-haired Exorcist who was bowing to him, chanting "I'm sorry".

Behind the three Exorcists, Kanda had watched the scene with an impassive face though his eyes particularly lingered on the silver-haired boy.

Allen didn't manage to train properly on that day because during all the time he was trying to practice, he could feel Kanda's gaze on him. The youkai was watching from far, but was close enough for Allen to feel nervous, and it seemed that Lavi and Lenalee were quite in the same state as him. Allen sometimes glanced quickly at Kanda, but the latter's face remained expressionless, to the boy's relief. At least the shikigami wasn't making fun of him openly.

_And why do I even care about what that youkai thinks of me? No matter how powerful he claims to be, I'm his master so he can shut his trap!_

"Allen. Allen!" the boy's thoughts were interrupted by Lavi's voice. "You've been spacing out for quite some time now. Wanna stop for today?"

Allen nodded.

"To be honest, I want to stop too," Lenalee added. Then, lowering her voice, she added: "I don't know about you, but today I felt kind of… stressed."

"I know what you mean," Allen muttered. "I can't help it; Kanda won't listen to me if I order him not to come here. Anyway, don't feel obliged to bring me along every time you go train."

"But if we don't, you'll never come," Lenalee kindly retorted.

"… I just don't like practicing exorcism."

"Yeah, but you never told us why," Lavi intervened.

"Because I simply don't like it," Allen half-lied.

"Well, never mind that for now. We all need some rest before dinner, so let's go back, shall we?" Lenalee suggested.

"Yes, let's go."

The three of them left the training grounds and started towards their respective rooms. Of course, Kanda silently followed them, as usual. With a hint of exasperation in his voice, Allen asked him:

"Why do you keep following us like this all the time? You don't want to stay in my room, fine; but you can go somewhere else to_enjoy yourself_," he said, accentuating the two last words.

"I enjoy myself enough by watching you," Kanda replied. "But thank you for caring so much about my own comfort," he added with a smirk.

"I don't give a damn about your comfort! Just get lost," Allen snapped, irritated.

"Stop being such a brat, you're making your friends uneasy."

"I don't think I'm the one making them uneasy," the boy replied dryly. "Come on, Lenalee, Lavi, let's not pay attention to him," he said, dragging his two friends by the sleeve and speeding up.

Kanda merely shrugged, letting the three of them leave as he kept walking at his own pace.

* * *

Dinner was over, and the only thing Allen wanted to do was to get some sleep. When he came back to his room, he saw Kanda sitting, his back against the wall, both arms and legs crossed, eyes closed. The room was only lit by one small lamp, and Allen found himself staring at Kanda's features which fineness were enhanced by the shadows on his face. Then his eyes drifted to that ebony hair falling in cascade on the youkai's shoulder and which color melted with his pitch black kimono.

This was seriously getting problematic. Allen couldn't understand what made him feel so attracted to that demon while everything in him was the incarnation of what the boy loathed the most.

The said demon seemed to notice he was being stared at, for he slowly opened his eyes and gazed back at Allen. The boy quickly came back to his senses and looked away, furious with his self that he had almost been caught.

"I'm going to get changed, so please get out," he said as politely as he could.

"I don't mind," Kanda merely replied.

Allen bit his lips, mentally trying to calm down. Fine, it's not like he minded either, it was just the fact that he wasn't used to having someone else in his room, even if that someone was his shikigami. Letting a small sigh out, he started removing his outer tunic and let it fall to the ground, then his hakama and the top of his kimono, and was about to grab his night clothes when he felt a firm grip on his left arm. He raised his eyes at Kanda who was now in front of him, examining his scar with interest.

"How did you get that? And the one on your eye?" he asked.

"None of your business," Allen tried to snatch his arm away, but Kanda didn't let go. Instead he traced the scar with his finger, along Allen's arm to his shoulder and collarbone.

At first, the contact of Kanda's skin on his skin made him flinch; he didn't want a youkai to touch him. Yet, at the same time, curious chills ran through his body as Kanda was tracing his scar, though he wanted to blame it on the fact that he was bare chested. He had expected Kanda's hand to be cold, but it was actually warm like a human's hand, which quite surprised him.

"Che, you were lucky your arm wasn't ripped off, Moyashi," Kanda commented, releasing Allen's arm.

"It's Allen," the boy answered curtly as he grabbed his night clothes and quickly put them on. "Quit calling me that, or I'll call you Bakanda."

The youkai twitched.

"You'd better not," he warned.

"Then just call me by my name or don't call me at all."

"Are your scars the reason you hate youkai so much?" Kanda asked, ignoring the boy's last sentence.

"None of your business," Allen answered again as he folded his Exorcist dress and put it next to the one he used to wear when he was still a student. Exorcist costumes were white and blue, while student ones were full red. Every time Allen put his white costume away, he remembered the day when Komui had officially given it to him. While most students would almost cry of joy when they received it, Allen had merely taken it, not feeling the single ounce of pleasure. Allen went back to his futon and sat down on it, preparing to sleep.

"Now I want to sleep, so please stop bothering me and put the lamp out when you sleep. If you happen to sleep, that is," he added, annoyed.

"Che, brat."

Allen didn't answer as he lay down, turning his back at Kanda, and closed his eyes. Because of the strain of the whole day, he managed to find sleep rather easily.

He didn't know if Kanda had slept, but as morning came, he found the youkai sitting in the same position as the night before, the only difference being that his dark blue eyes were locked on Allen. The boy simply ignored him and quickly got dressed, knowing that Kanda kept staring at him.

"Are you going to take another request today?" the youkai finally spoke.

"I'm not the one to decide about that. Komui is in charge of giving Exorcists requests," Allen replied curtly.

The boy was about to leave the room, when Kanda asked again:

"Why do you hate youkai so much?"

"Stop asking me that. I already told you it's none of your concern."

"I dare think it actually is, since I'm a youkai, and since I'm your shikigami," Kanda added with a sigh.

"Shut up. I don't need you to remind me of that fact. And don't start pissing me off so early in the morning," Allen said sharply as he put his hand on the door to open it.

"Wrong answer," was the only warning Allen heard before he felt a hand tightly gripping his wrist and turning him round while another hand pinned him against the wooden door. Kanda didn't look pleased at all when Allen raised his eyes at him.

"I think I told you to watch your mouth," Kanda said in a dangerous tone. "I know I've said that killing everyone here would be boring, but who knows, when I'm pissed off I can become rather violent."

Allen was immobile. The youkai was merely holding his wrist, but his whole body refused to move, except for a shiver when Kanda had spoken. Visibly satisfied, he released the boy's wrist.

"It seems you understood what I meant," he said. Then, sliding the door open, he went on more casually: "Well, I suppose you were about to go eat so I'll accompany you. Unless you'd rather stand here like a fool."

Allen glared at him, and walked out of the room, furious. On their way to the kitchen, an impressive silence was filling the air, partly because none of them spoke, but also because the people around them stopped talking as soon as they saw the two of them, too scared of whatever could happen to them if they weren't careful.

But right now, that was the last of Allen's concerns. Right now, he was furious, more against himself than against Kanda. How come he went to pieces every time the youkai touched him or was too close to him? How come he couldn't react properly every time Kanda plunged his eyes into his own? Kanda was a demon, for heaven's sake! Allen was supposed to despise them, he was supposed not to let them approach him; he wasn't supposed to let himself lose his mind because of Kanda!

_But he has power._

Yes, Kanda had power. Allen tried to convince himself it was all that power which attracted him to that demon, tried to convince his self that it was a trick to force him to let his guard down… But that didn't really help him fight that enthrallment he had for Kanda, and it was precisely why he was furious against himself. Once again, Allen started thinking that Komui was right and that he didn't have the ability to handle such a powerful youkai.

Allen walked past Komui's working room, and being too lost in his thoughts, didn't notice the man calling him several times before Kanda's voice brought him back to reality:

"Oi, Moyashi."

"It's Allen, Bakanda," the boy snapped.

"Allen!" Komui called him once more. "Were you daydreaming? I called you at least three times," he said with a smile.

"Oh, sorry Komui, I didn't hear you. What is it?" the boy asked.

"Well, I've got a request here and I thought it would be fine for you. There shouldn't be any problem."

"Fine. Do I need to go now?"

"The requester wants it to be done before the end of the day, so you're not in a hurry. You may leave whenever you want. The place is one hour walk from here though."

"I'll leave now then." Allen wasn't very hungry, anyway.

"Good. Here are the details," Komui said while handing him a scroll. "Good luck, Allen."

"Thank you."

After Komui left, Allen opened the scroll and read it. Then he turned to his shikigami:

"Another purification. I suppose you won't want to come since you'll have nothing to do there," he said, obviously wishing that Kanda would agree with him.

"No, I'll come," the youkai replied, unfortunately, which made Allen sigh deeply.

* * *

It was with a very sullen face that Allen walked through the town, Kanda by his side. Some people were glancing at them and whispering between them, obviously because Allen's appearance was strange, though the silver-haired boy didn't pay any attention at them since he was used to receiving those kinds of looks at the Temple from the students and some Exorcists. But suddenly, Allen saw a kid picking up a stone and throwing it at him, yelling with his childish voice:

"Go away, bad demon!"

Allen barely had time to protect himself with his arm; but no stone hit him. As he lowered his arm, he saw Kanda throwing the stone he had caught away.

"Che. I feel like killing that kid," he said, looking at the now terrified child who ran to his mother. She bowed and apologized deeply, yet it was more because she was also scared than because of what her child had done. Allen shrugged.

"Never mind. Let's go."

Both of them resumed walking under the frightened looks of the people around them. As they walked, Allen suddenly muttered:

"Thanks for earlier."

"Che, it was a mere reflex. I'd have enjoyed seeing you hit by a stone," Kanda replied with a smirk.

"I suppose I couldn't have expected so much from a youkai, after all," Allen mumbled.

They remained silent until they arrived at the place Allen was supposed to purify. This time, it took him more time than the previous request, since the building was bigger; but the exorcism went on without any problem. After he was done and took the payment from the requester, Allen called his shikigami:

"I'm done. Let's leave." But Kanda didn't move; he was looking somewhere else.

"Hey, I said let's leave! Though you can stay here, I don't really care actually," Allen went on as he started walking away.

"Che. Annoying brat," Kanda replied before following the boy, though he glanced one last time behind him, frowning.

Not that far away, perched on a tree, a shadowed silhouette was watching the two of them, a sly grin on its lips.

"Hehe, I almost got caught. As expected from you, Kanda. Now let's see how well you'll be able to protect your new master."

* * *

Once again, I'd like to thank you all for all those reviews. There were so many that I thought it was a bug or something ^^. For those who are already impatient because there is no Yullen yet, I'll say that I need a fine plot and settings before putting some Yullen, simply because I don't like rushing things. Rest assured that you won't have to wait 20 chapters before you get your Yullen though ^^.


	4. Devotion

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property, though I wish it wasn't.

A/N: Ok so I'm leaving to Paris for the 3 next weeks for my orals (where I'm going to die), so in case I don't survive the examinations, I give you this longer-than-usual chapter for you to enjoy (or at least, I hope you will). Dunno when I'll have a computer while I'm gone so I may reply your reviews very very very late ^^°.

Thanks to **Klappy **for beta-ing the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 4 – Devotion**

Thirteen days had passed since Allen and Kanda's first encounter, and the silver-haired boy had started getting more or less used to the youkai's company, though it couldn't be said that their relationship was particularly friendly. It was far from that, actually.

On that day, Allen was headed to Komui's work room to give him the payment of his last request. As he reached the door, he stopped, because he could hear someone else talking with his superior on the other side on the wooden panel.

"… recently. Our Exorcists always come too late. I don't know if this is related to the awakening of that demon, but it's too much to be a coincidence," the voice said.

"How many villages?" Komui asked.

"Four so far. All turned to ashes. And we've been receiving many more requests than usual for the last few days. It seems that youkai are suddenly multiplying and attacking randomly; our Exorcists are not enough to handle them."

"… I see." Komui let out a sigh. "If that's really the case, then youkai may soon be invading our city. I can't possibly send Exorcists on the outskirts of the town, it's way too big…."

"Indeed. But you should dispatch at least two at the emperor's palace, for his safety."

Komui forced a laugh.

"You think the youkai are aiming at the emperor?" he asked. "Sorry, but you forget that youkai are not humans. Why would they take the emperor as their target? Anyway, I will ask him to give his approval to send some Exorcists in the most crowded districts."

"Fine. Do as you wish. Allow me to give you one last piece of advice, though. You should find a way to get rid of that boy and his shikigami. You know who I'm talking about."

"Young Allen? For the last time, that boy isn't dangerous or anything," Komui replied, sighing. "I'll keep him in the Temple, and my decision won't change."

Behind the door, Allen was listening closely, almost holding his breath.

"Very well," the unknown man replied dryly. "I'll take my leave then."

"Sure. Thank you for the report, Pai."

Allen heard footsteps approaching the door and he quickly hurried away, acting as if he had just arrived at Komui's working room when the said Pai slid the panel open. The man saw Allen and glanced at him with no kindness in his eyes, then quickly left.

"Oh, Allen, you're here! Come in, come in," Komui invited as he saw the boy.

Allen walked in and handed Komui the payment.

"Komui, I… well I kind of heard what you were talking about with the other man, and I was wondering… well… don't you plan to send Exorcists to protect the other villages?" he asked hesitantly.

"You heard? Well, I don't mind. As for sending Exorcists… Allen, do you know how many villages there are around here? And do you know how many Exorcists are available at the Temple?"

Allen shook his head.

"Well there are at least twenty to thirty villages, for only twelve Exorcists. I know it's unfair, but the best I can do for now is to protect the main city."

"… I suppose so," the boy murmured, a hint of bitterness in his voice.

"You should go rest, Allen," Komui advised him gently. "You need to stay in good shape for further requests."

"I will do so."

Allen left the room and started heading for his own, when he changed his mind and decided to go to the garden. There, he sat at his usual spot, enjoying the coolness of the weather, nor too hot or too cold, and closed his eyes.

Burnt villages, huh? And not enough Exorcists to protect the remaining ones? If there had been enough, maybe Allen's own village would still be intact. For a moment, the boy tried to imagine what his life could have been if the Exorcist who had saved him years ago had arrived in time. He would still be living with his family, helping the villagers on the fields, and then playing in the river with children his age before his mother would call him for dinner. He wouldn't have been brought to the Temple of the Black Order, forced to become an Exorcist, and he would never have summoned Kanda. Unconsciously, a faint smile appeared on his face. Life would have been good.

"It's rare to see you smile when you're alone, Moyashi."

Allen didn't jump, since he was getting used to being interrupted in his thoughts by that unpleasant presence which was Kanda, but let out a sigh of irritation.

"I can't be alone since you keep stalking me," he said with a scowling face.

"Stalking? Not really, I was just wondering what took you so long since you didn't go back to your room."

"Why do you care?"

"I'm just bored, and arguing with you is about the only entertainment I have here," Kanda replied as if it was obvious.

"No one is forbidding you to have a walk in the forest if you are bored," Allen said, annoyed.

"Che, you want a demon like me to 'have a walk in the forest'? Just who do you think I am?"

After so many days of arguing with Kanda, Allen had progressively learnt to ignore most of the youkai's answers. So he merely said:

"Never mind. I'm going back."

Of course, Kanda followed him. In his room, Allen lay on his futon, but kept his eyes open, thinking. His shikigami was sitting against the wall as usual, and no one spoke for a few minutes, until Allen finally opened his mouth:

"There have been attacks on villages recently."

As he didn't receive any reply – not that he had expected one, anyway – he went on: "It seems they've started a few days after I freed you." Allen sat up, and then looked at Kanda. "Do you think there's a relation?"

"Che, how should I know?"

"Well, the night you came out from the altar there was a huge release of power, so maybe other youkai could have sensed it and gone berserk."

To Allen's surprise, Kanda looked away, though the demon was visibly upset by something.

"So?" Allen insisted.

"I told you I don't know," Kanda replied dryly, which made Allen sigh.

"You claim to be a powerful demon and whatnot, but you're actually pretty useless…" he said.

"At least I don't have the spiritual energy of a goldfish," the other retorted sarcastically.

"Well, sorry for having that little energy, but at least I didn't kill thousands of people when I was younger. But I suppose you don't give a damn about that," Allen snapped.

The boy pulled his knees to his chest and buried his face in, whispering:

"Monsters… What do you gain for destroying so many lives…?"

Kanda heard, but said nothing and did nothing, merely looking at the boy in front of him with his dark blue eyes where no sympathy could be read. He was a demon, after all.

* * *

"Allen, I'd like you to check on this. The requester said strange things have been occurring in his shed lately, and he's pretty sure it's not the work of thieves, but of youkai. But they only happen by night. So go there tonight and see for yourself what it is about," Komui told the silver-haired boy while handing him his request scroll.

Allen nodded and took his leave. As night came, he left the Temple and headed for the town, along with Kanda. The shed was located in one of the rich districts of the main city, and the boy managed to find it with no difficulty. By night, Allen felt more at ease because his white hair wasn't as visible as during the day, and because there were less people out at that time; as for Kanda, his dark clothes almost made him invisible in the night. Though he didn't want to inquire about it, Allen noticed that Kanda kept glancing here and there, as if he was looking for something. Never mind that; Allen would focus on the request, as usual. The requester, a short man of about forty, came out from his house, visibly relieved to see the Exorcist as he greeted the boy warmly, a lantern in one hand.

"Thank you for coming, my young boy. You were sent by the Temple, right? Come, I'll show you," the man said as he led Allen to the entrance of the shed. "You see, I'm a doctor, and I store all the ingredients I need for my drugs in this shed. Five days ago, when I came to take some plants, everything was in a total mess, and some were probably taken away so I thought at first it was a thief. I tidied everything on that day, but the morning after, I found my shed in the same state as the previous morning, and as I said, it's been going on like this for five days. And furthermore, I asked for guards to keep an eye on the shed during the night, but it was useless. They told me they heard nothing nor see anything, yet my shed was devastated again! It's a youkai, I'm sure of it. Please make it go away; as you may have noticed, the pay is high."

"I'll see what I can do," Allen replied with a smile. "Don't worry. Some youkai may simply have decided to play some pranks on you."

"Thank you a lot. Please come in, then," the man invited Allen in the shed and lit the area with his lantern, though the place was tall and large and couldn't be lit entirely.

Allen entered, followed by Kanda, and looked all around the place. Indeed, the ground was strewn with countless dried leaves and stems of various plants, along with many other ingredients Allen didn't recognize.

"Ok, let's start."

Allen closed his eyes, trying to sense the presence of any spiritual energy betraying the presence of a youkai. And he sensed it. To his relief, it wasn't a particularly powerful one, he would exorcise it quickly.

"Please lend me your lantern," Allen asked the man. "I'll purify the place right away."

"Thank you, my young boy."

Allen took the lantern and headed towards the direction where he had sensed the youkai. Kanda remained behind, not bothering to follow the boy. However, he suddenly opened his eyes wide and ran after Allen:

"Moyashi! Come back here!"

The silver-haired boy barely had time to hear Kanda before a monstrous figure rushed out from the shadows with a low growl and jumped on him, pinning him on the ground. Allen gasped of horror and dropped the lantern beside him. Flames started spreading, igniting the dry vegetation. But that was the last of Allen's worries. Right now, his eyes were locked on the thing which was on top of him: a wolf. No, the monster shared the same characteristics as a wolf, but it was bigger, with longer fangs, and looked much more impressive than a normal wolf. And it spoke:

"Farewell, owner of the monk's blood," it said with its guttural voice before opening its mouth wide, ready to plant its fangs in Allen's neck. The boy, helpless, couldn't do anything but shut his eyes tightly, paralyzed by the youkai on him.

The second after, he heard a slashing sound, and the heavy weight on his chest was no more. As he opened his eyes, he was facing Kanda's back; his shikigami was standing in front of him, a sword – where did that sword come from? – in his hand. Kanda slightly turned his head on the side.

"Stay behind me and try not to get burnt," he ordered Allen.

The boy quickly stood up, and saw the wolf-like youkai facing Kanda, baring its fangs, ready to jump on him. It spoke again:

"My, my, even after a hundred and sixty-two years you're still that skilled."

"And you'll be cold meat in a minute," Kanda replied icily as he charged at the youkai with his sword.

Allen was stunned. It was the first time he actually saw Kanda fight, and his eyes were locked on the shikigami whose each movement was precise, sharp and graceful at the time. His long, dark hair and the sleeves of his black kimono were flying in the air, following each of his gestures, contrasting with the luminous flames which started surrounding them. It seemed to Allen that Kanda was dancing on the flames, and it was simply captivating. To the point that Allen almost forgot that the whole shed was now on fire, before he was snapped out of his trance by the requester's voice:

"My shed! My shed's on fire! Water, we need water! Hurry, hurry!" he screamed as he ran everywhere, too panicked to see the wolf jumping past Kanda and rushing at him. In less than one second, the man was thrown into the fire by the powerful paw of the youkai and disappeared into the flames.

"No!" Allen yelled in horror.

"The man was simply too annoying, don't you agree… Kanda?" the wolf asked the black-haired youkai.

"Che," the latter merely said, frowning, before he got ready to charge at the wolf again.

"Come on, bring it on!"

Kanda was about to attack, but he saw Allen from the corner of his eye and swore silently. The building was about to collapse, and that stupid brat was standing there, gazing at them without moving! Kanda had to finish this quickly. In less than a second, he released his spiritual energy, unleashing his powers and making the area shake under the shockwave, then aimed the tip of his blade at the wolf, and struck. At the same time, the canine youkai jumped on Kanda. Its claws grazed Kanda's arm while the blade of the sword traced a long, crimson line on the wolf's fur.

Kanda winced under the pain while the other youkai flinched and fell to the ground. Meanwhile, Allen was trying to walk in the middle of the flames towards his shikigami, but his gait was unsteady as he walked, his head felt dizzy partly because of the heat surrounding him and he was beginning to suffocate. The atmosphere had suddenly become heavy right after Kanda had released his spiritual energy and Allen felt as if someone had hammered his head. The silver-haired boy tripped and fell forward, barely feeling the pair of black-sleeved arms catching him before he hit the ground. Allen passed out, a forest scent filling his nose and a single word escaping his lips:

"Kanda…"

"Che. Couldn't stand my spiritual energy, huh? Idiot Moyashi."

Around them, burning beams were falling and the flames were getting dangerously close to them. Carrying Allen in his arms, Kanda hurried to the entrance door, ignoring the pain of his wound. A minute later, the whole shed collapsed to nothing.

Outside, many people had gathered, visibly panicked and trying to put out the fire, some even came to Kanda to offer help, but the youkai merely dismissed them. His first priority was to bring Allen back to a safe place, meaning the Temple.

Hidden behind one of the houses near the destroyed shed, a spiky-haired girl was kneeling next to the massive and injured wolf.

"I'll bring you home now. Idiot, why didn't you wait for the Earl's orders instead of rushing like that?" she asked softly. Then, with smirk, she added: "Well done, Kanda. For now. But you won't be able to protect your master indefinitely."

The girl held out her hand, and a gate appeared. She asked the wolf:

"Can you cross the gate, or do I have to pull you?"

"Tss, of course I can. An injury like this is nothing," the youkai answered. Then its body started changing shape, fur disappearing, replaced by normal clothes, paws turning to human members. The now human-looking youkai stood up with difficulty, holding his injury at the side with one hand, and started walking to the gate.

"Ok, let's go."

The two demons disappeared through the gate, unseen by any.

* * *

Allen slowly opened his eyes, and winced as his head throbbed under the pain of a headache. He carefully sat up, noticing that he was wearing some bandages. He tried to remember what had happened; he was in the middle of the shed in flames, and Kanda was fighting that other youkai, then he suddenly felt an enormous surge of power… then nothing.

"Allen, you're awake!"

The boy turned his head to the side, and saw Lenalee and Lavi coming to him. The girl was visibly very worried.

"God, I'm glad your injuries are not serious. When I asked my brother, he told me you were here, so Lavi and I thought you may have been badly injured or something," she explained.

Here? Right, Allen was in the hospital room.

"I'm fine, sorry for making you worry," the boy answered with a reassuring smile.

"What the hell happened? Komui told us he didn't know anything," Lavi asked.

"Well… I don't really know… I went to that shed to exorcise a youkai which had taken shelter in it. It wasn't a strong one, I'm sure of it since it didn't have much spiritual energy." Allen started narrating. "But suddenly… a huge wolf jumped on me and attacked me, but Kanda saved me and fought it… and… Oh, right! Where's Kanda?" he asked suddenly. Somehow, not seeing the youkai next to him disappointed him, though he couldn't tell why.

"Your shikigami? We don't know. You should ask Komui for that, we barely learnt of the news this morning," Lavi replied.

"Morning? It is morning already?"

"Yes, we brought you something to eat in case you were starving," Lenalee said with a gentle smile as she presented Allen with a plate of small cakes and fruit.

"Oh, thanks a lot, Lenalee!" Allen exclaimed, helping himself.

"By the way, that… wolf, what happened to it?" Lavi asked.

"I don't know, I think I passed out during the fight," Allen replied, slightly blushing.

"It was a youkai, huh?" Lenalee asked, sympathizing.

"Probably, since it talked… and it seemed to know Kanda, or at least I believe so," Allen went on pensively.

Lavi was about to add something, when a nurse came and interrupted them:

"The boy needs some rest, given his state he should be able to go out in a few hours, but for now you should leave."

"Ok. We'll see you later then, Allen!"

After both his friends left, the nurse told him:

"Your superior Komui said he'd like to see you whenever you feel in good shape enough.

Allen nodded.

* * *

Allen was done reporting to Komui, telling him all the details he remembered. The older man looked deep in thoughts.

"I don't know what all of this means. I can't see what a youkai of that level was doing there. Now it's become an emergency, I have to talk to the emperor about it. Thank you for your hard work, Allen. I'm very sorry it turned out like this," Komui added, sighing.

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry… I wasn't able to fill the request, and the requester even… died, because I was too incompetent…" Allen was clenching his fists, guilt clearly displayed on his face.

"Allen, no one blames you for this tragic death." Komui tried to reassure the boy. "I don't think that man could have been saved if I had sent someone else."

"But…"

"No buts, Allen. That demon even managed to hurt Kanda, meaning it was pretty powerful."

"Kanda? Could you tell me where Kanda is? I didn't see him anywhere," Allen asked, suddenly remembering his shikigami.

"Your shikigami is in the Room of Purification. As I said, he's been injured during his fight with the other youkai, and it seems that a poison started spreading through his injury. Professor Nine has been healing him for the whole night, and she isn't done yet."

"Is it that serious?" Allen asked, worried.

"Well, yesterday, when he came back to the Temple with you in his arms, he was barely able to stand. You found yourself a very devoted shikigami, Allen," Komui added.

"Well… I suppose so," the boy replied, slightly blushing. Devoted? There was no way Kanda could be devoted to someone. Yet if what Komui said was true, Allen would have to go thank him.

"Can I go see him now?" he asked.

"You can try, though you won't be able to enter the Room before Professor Nine is done."

"Thank you."

Allen bowed and left the room. He headed for the Room of Purification, a small shrine next to the Temple used only to expel dangerous evil contaminations. Was it concern which made him speed up? Or simply impatience? He didn't want to think about it. The doors were closed when he arrived and two guards were keeping it, meaning that the purification wasn't done. Allen let out a sigh of frustration; he'd have to wait. He sat on a bench not far from there and waited for more than half an hour before the doors finally opened. A fine woman with golden hair walked out, looking terribly exhausted, but she motioned Allen to come when she saw him.

"How is Kanda?" Allen immediately asked as he came to her.

"He will be fine. I took out all the poison, but he needs to stay in the room for one more hour for the purification to be complete."

"Can I—"

"You can enter, though I doubt you'll be able to talk to him for now. I've put seals, so don't touch them. I'll come back in an hour," Nine replied.

"Thank you very much, Professor!"

Allen stepped into the shrine. It was the first time he saw what it looked like inside, and it didn't look like an ordinary shrine at all. It was pretty dark, the only source of light was a huge luminous globe hanging in the middle of the ceiling, and it emitted a blue-tinted light. There was a single round room with high sculpted pillars all around, and a large, round pool of water in the middle.

And Kanda was standing in the middle of that pool. Seals were floating in the air around him. At that moment, the first thought which crossed Allen's mind was 'B_eautiful'_. The sight in front of him was purely beautiful; the black-haired youkai was standing in the mid-height water, naked, with his eyes closed under the blue light which was reflected by the water, enhancing every curve of his flawless body. There was a strange, black tattoo on his chest, which intrigued Allen for a moment, but his mind was so mesmerized by the present sight that he quickly forgot about it, focusing his attention on his shikigami._His_shikigami.

What was wrong with him? For years, Allen had claimed to hate youkai more than anything else, and now it had taken him only one bond with one of them to feel infinitely attracted to them? No. Not to them. To_him_. Allen's hear beat rose. He gulped. For the hundredth time, any rational thought vanished as his eyes turned to Kanda's handsome face. It was not only his physical appearance, but also the aura of power which Allen could feel continuously, even when Kanda repressed his spiritual energy.

Allen sat on the pool's edge and brought his knees to his chest. For the whole next hour, the silver-haired boy waited for Kanda to finally open his eyelids, to reveal those cobalt eyes in which Allen was always willing to let himself drown into. He was well aware of his own vulnerability against Kanda, yet it felt so good to yield to that demon, to let that incarnation of temptation take over his mind.

He waited.

Silently.

Still.

And finally, two dark blue pools gazed back at him.

They remained silent for a minute, enough time for Allen to realize that Kanda was watching him, before the young Exorcist opened his mouth:

"Kanda…" he murmured.

"Che, that's what you've said before fainting back then. Don't you have anything else to say?" the other replied with a smirk, still standing in the middle of the water.

That brought Allen back to earth. He had said Kanda's name before passing out? Really, just what was wrong with him?

"How long have you been slacking here?" Kanda asked again.

"W-What do you mean, how long?" Allen asked defensively. "I-I came here a few minutes ago."

"Che, I've felt your spiritual energy for way longer than that."

"You felt it? I thought you were asleep or something like that!" Allen asked, a faint blush appearing on his cheeks.

"Then you're an idiot. And yes, I can feel your energy, even if it's lower than an ant's."

"Stop insulting me like that! At least I wasn't injured enough to spend a whole night in the Room of Purification!"

"Says the one who fainted simply because I released my spiritual energy," Kanda sneered.

"You… you jerk! And I've been waiting for you for a whole hour!" the silver-haired boy said before gasping as he immediately put his two hands over his mouth.

Kanda raised an eyebrow, and then a smirk appeared on his lips.

"An hour, huh? May I know the reason of such a long wait, Moyashi?"

"N-None of your business! Anyway, I'm leaving, Bakanda!" Allen snapped back, half embarrassed and half irritated.

As he turned round and was about to leave, the shrine door opened, and his teacher Cloud Nine appeared behind it.

"Oh, Professor…"

"Your shikigami must be awake now, right?" she asked.

"Y-Yes, he is. I'll be leaving now," Allen answered before coming back to the Temple hurriedly, not noticing the questioning look on his teacher's face.

Allen almost ran back to the Temple, straight to his room, his heart beating a bit too quickly to blame it only on his running. After arriving at his room, he slid the door closed and leant his back on the wooden panel, trying to take his breath back.

"He pisses me off, he totally does! Just what's his problem already? So much ego should be forbidden, for heaven's sake!" Allen was fulminating. Then he let himself slide to the floor, sighing.

_And what's the damn problem with me too?_

He closed his eyes in an attempt at calming himself down. He was weak, very well. But he had never asked to become an Exorcist to begin with; still, was it a valid enough reason? Having a very average spiritual energy had never bothered him before, yet, since he had taken Kanda as his shikigami, a feeling of annoyance had started growing in him, annoyance at always being looked down upon by a youkai.

Allen opened his eyes, and determination started showing in them.

"You think I'm worthless, right? Then I'll show you how wrong you can be, Kanda," he said in his most serious tone.

* * *

Yeah, Allen's gonna be stronger, because keeping a weak Allen through the whole story would be pretty annoying, right?  
Oh, and here's a little game: who are the girl and the wolf? No that it's very difficult to guess about the girl lol.  
See you all! (I hope :D)


	5. Strength

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property. And it seems to be coming back in August.

A/N: Yes I'm back. Alive. And sorry for this lame chapter, but I felt it was kinda necessary. Also, you have the answer as for who is the wolf :] Most of you said it was Tyki, unfortunately it's not.

Thanks to **Klappy** for beta-ing the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 5 – Strength**

"_Found you! Now it's your turn to count!"_

"_Geez, you're too good at playing hide-and-seek, Allen! Ok, I'll count now… One, two, three…"_

_The small silver-haired kid ran to his favorite hiding spot, an abandoned shed not far away from there. As he ran to the place, he saw smoke rising in the sky in the direction of where the shed was. Slightly intrigued, he hurried there and gasped as he arrived. The shed was on fire. Fortunately, since it was abandoned, there was nothing valuable in it. The nine-year old Allen was about to run back to his village to call for help to put out the fire, when he saw something moving in the middle of the flames which were slowly devouring the wooden building._

_Allen thought he was going to scream at the sight of what was emerging from the fire and walking to him. A man. Burning. Though Allen wasn't close enough to distinguish all the details, he could perfectly see the man's skin slowly vanish to nothing as flames licked his face, revealing red flesh and bones under. The man kept emitting inhuman sounds from what was left of his mouth as he held out his arm to Allen who was frozen by shock._

"_It's… your fault… young boy…" the man said._

_Allen did the only thing he could do at that moment: he ran away. He ran to his village, tears flowing from his eyes. What was that man doing there? And… his fault? Why? The small boy didn't know, and kept running as fast as he could. His village was right in front of him, but as soon as Allen saw it, he stopped dead and dropped to his knees. No… the whole village was engulfed in flames too… What was happening? What the hell was happening!_

_Allen rushed. He had to find his parents. He entered the village and ran to his house, trying to avoid the human torches running everywhere, screaming in pain before collapsing and rolling on the ground. Allen had his eyes half-closed in order not to see the horror around him. He finally reached his house, which was also burning._

"_Dad! Mom! Where are you!" he yelled. He didn't dare get closer because of the flames. "Dad! Mom! It's me, Allen! Where are you!" he repeated._

"_Al-len…" a voice behind made him turn his head, only to see his mother on the ground._

"_Mom! W-what happened to you? Where's Dad?"_

_But as Allen kneeled to help her, he saw that a huge slash crossed her bloody chest._

"_Allen… youkai… attacked us… they got your father…" his mother said as she pointed a bit farther away. As Allen looked, he thought he was going to throw up. His father's head was lying on the ground, next to the rest of his body. The boy's vision was blurry because of the tears flowing out, and he couldn't manage to pronounce a word._

"_It's your fault, Allen…" her mother went on, making Allen's eyes open wide. "If you weren't… such a weak… Exorcist… everyone would be… safe…"_

"_Exorcist? What are you talking about? I'm not…" Allen started, panicked, before he felt a hand on his shoulder. Again he turned his head to see who it was, and let out a scream. It was the same man he had seen at the shed, with half his skeleton visible, staring at him with bulging eyes._

"_It's your fault… young boy…"_

"_Wh— No! I didn't do anything!" Allen defended himself, trying to get away from that bloody hand._

"_You didn't do anything… you're a failure… as an Exorcist…" the man went on._

"_I'm not an Exorcist!"_

"_Failure…" Allen's mother repeated._

"_Trash…" the man went on._

"_No!" Allen screamed._

"_You deserve death."_

_From nowhere, a wolf-like demon jumped on Allen and spoke to him:_

_"Die," it said with an devilish laugh, before opening its mouth wide and plunging its fangs into Allen's flesh._

"NO!" Allen woke up with a start, trembling uncontrollably, his body drenched in cold sweat and his breath ragged. A nightmare. He was sitting on his futon, eyes wide open, when a voice made him jump again:

"What the hell is wrong with you, Moyashi?"

Allen slowly turned his head to his shikigami who was sitting against the wall at his usual spot, looking at him strangely. The silver-haired boy didn't answer at first, too busy trying to calm down and take his breath back.

"Oi, I asked you what was that scream for?" Kanda insisted, annoyed.

"N-nothing," was the first answer which came to Allen.

"Che, you wake up in the middle of the night screaming and sweating and tell me it's nothing. Right."

Allen didn't reply, instead he brought his knees to his chest and pulled the blanket to him, burying his face in it.

That man who was burning in his dream, Allen had recognized him. It was the doctor who had requested the boy to clean his shed from any youkai, and he was the man whom Allen had allowed to be killed by that wolf demon. The irony… right after he had made the decision to become stronger, his own powerlessness came back to haunt him.

"My fault…" he whispered, unheard by Kanda who was still watching him, more out of curiosity than concern.

A wave of guilt seized him; that man was right, Allen was to blame for his death. There were his parents as well, and all the other inhabitants of his village who had all been massacred by demons. If the Exorcists were more powerful, maybe they would all be alive now, like all the many people who had died recently because of the Exorcists' inefficiency.

"It's my fault…" he repeated again, louder this time.

"What's your fault?" Kanda interrupted the boy's thoughts.

Allen slowly raised his eyes to Kanda, tiny drops of tears falling on his cheeks.

"Che, don't tell me you had a nightmare and you're whining because of it," the shikigami sneered.

"Shut up…" Allen murmured as he buried his face in the blanket again. He didn't have enough strength to argue with Kanda.

"And what's your fault?" the other asked again.

"…"

"Let me guess. Yesterday was your first time to see someone die on you, and you think it was your duty to save him," Kanda went on casually, noticing Allen's body twitch. "Guess I was right."

"Just shut up," Allen mumbled in his blanket.

"You couldn't have done anything for him at your level," Kanda said, ignoring the boy's last sentence.

"I know that! But I could have tried!" the silver-haired boy snapped back.

"Che, you'd have died with him. I can't believe you can be so stupid."

"Shut up."

"You're also stupid to have had a nightmare about that," Kanda provoked Allen a little more.

"Shut up! You don't know… you just freaking don't know!" Allen burst out.

"Know what? That you're a wimp who can do nothing but remain frozen in front of danger then whine about it later?" Kanda said coldly.

"Just shut up, for heaven's sake!" the boy covered his ears with his hands, shaking his head frantically.

"You're pathetic."

Allen couldn't stand it anymore. He abruptly got out of his futon and rushed to the door, bare footed, but didn't manage to grasp the handle as Kanda had already caught up with him and grabbed the boy's wrist tightly, turning him round to force him to face Kanda. Allen tried to free himself but failed miserably as Kanda caught both his wrists with one hand.

"Just look at you," the youkai said with contempt. "Do you think you'll be able to do anything if you get into that state any time something doesn't go as you want?"

Allen stopped struggling at those words, and merely looked away. He didn't want to face Kanda, he didn't want their eyes to meet because he knew he wouldn't bear his shikigami's look, he knew he would feel even more helpless under Kanda's mere gaze.

"So?" Kanda asked.

"Why do you care? Just mind your own business and don't mess with me if you can't stand me that much," Allen replied almost automatically. Kanda tightened his grip on the boy's wrists, making him wince.

"Why do I care? I care because I'm your shikigami and it makes me sick whenever I think that I'm forced to serve under such a weakling!" Kanda was visibly pissed off.

"I never asked for it!" Allen snapped back, angry. "If I had been given choice, I'd never have taken you as my shikigami! I'd never have taken any!"

"But you don't have any choice, so deal with it. You say it's your fault that man died? Fine, feel free to think so. But don't freaking just let it go like that and cry. Just get stronger, damn it!" Kanda added, surprising the boy and making him raise his eyes to Kanda.

In the dark room, Allen's eyes had had time to adjust to the lack of light, which allowed him to distinguish Kanda's features, and he was slightly surprised to see that there was no disdain his attitude.

"Just get stronger, you say?" Allen spoke softly. Then, almost unconsciously, he leant his forehead on Kanda's chest and put a hand – when did Kanda release him? – on the black fabric of Kanda's kimono, expecting the youkai to push him back, but Kanda did nothing. "You know what?" he went on. "I've already made my decision to get stronger. I'm an Exorcist, and I want to be able to help people. It just seems that I'll need a lot of training for that."

"You sure do," Kanda replied immediately, though Allen didn't detect any hint of malice in his tone, or maybe it was because his mind was still too messed up. In the back of his head, there was a slight disappointment, though Allen couldn't tell why; maybe it was because he had hoped that Kanda would offer his help but the boy quickly shook the idea out. There was no way he could ask a demon to help him.

They stood like that for a few seconds, not moving nor speaking, before Kanda took Allen's hand which was still on his chest and pulled it away, making Allen raise his head to him.

"Go sleep, Moyashi. There are still a few hours before morning," the youkai merely said before walking away, sitting against the wall and closing his eyes.

Allen went back to his own bed and pulled the blanket over him, yet he didn't try to fall back to sleep. He was thinking. During those few seconds when he had rested against Kanda, the anger, the frustration and the sorrow slowly faded away. It was the first time he had felt so relieved next to someone; Lavi and Lenalee weren't the same, they were his friends but he'd never talked to them about what he felt inside because he knew that the only thing they'd feel for him afterwards would be pity, and he didn't want pity.

Kanda didn't offer him pity, nor kindness, nor comfort but simply the point of view of a demon._A demon_. And that had calmed Allen down. To the silver-haired boy, it was absolutely nonsense that a mere youkai could make him feel better than other humans. Yet it was the case, and Allen found himself being even more confused about his shikigami.

Allen sighed. How long was Kanda going to torture his mind like that? From the corner of his eye, he glanced at the – sleeping? – shikigami and decided to care about it later. For now, there were still a few hours before morning.

And serious training for him.

* * *

The morning after, Allen walked with determination to one of his former teacher's classroom, Professor Froi Tiedoll. Among all the teachers he had had, he was his favorite because of his gentleness and care. He was a former Exorcist who had chosen to teach the young about the art of exorcism and took great pleasure in doing so.

It was early in the morning, and classes hadn't started yet when Allen knocked on the classroom door. He heard a 'come in!' and slid the panel open. His teacher was sitting in front of a low table and was writing something on a scroll. As he saw Allen, he put his brush on the table and his face lit up.

"Allen-kun! It's been quite some time since I last saw you. How are you doing? Come in," the old man invited with a bright smile.

"Good morning, Professor. I am doing fine, thank you," Allen answered politely as he stepped in and sat in front of his teacher.

"It's rare to see you here, Allen-kun. How may I help you?"

"Ah, well… I've come here to ask for some advice, Professor," Allen started hesitantly but seeing the encouraging smile of Tiedoll helped him feel more at ease, and Allen went on with more assurance. "I need to increase my spiritual energy. I know it's low, and I can't possibly be of any use for the Temple with so little power, so I need a way to become more efficient," he explained.

The old man raised an eyebrow.

"Low? But my dear Allen-kun, your spiritual energy is certainly not low, I've seen far worse than you, there's no worry about that. Why are you thinking that you aren't of any use for the Temple?"

"Well… I… was told several times that my level as an Exorcist leaves a lot to be desired, and my last request…" Allen stopped as scenes flashed through his mind.

"I know about that request, and what I can tell you is that you have absolutely no reason to blame yourself for what happened. I'm pretty sure Komui told you the same thing, am I wrong?"

"No, but—"

"And whoever said you are not a worthy Exorcist either wants to annoy you or is very bad at energy sensing," Tiedoll went on calmly. "Now listen to me. I'm pretty experienced when it comes to evaluate people's spiritual energies, and this is what I think about yours: yours is not as low as you think, but it is fluctuating, not clearly defined. For the three years you've been here, I could perfectly feel that you've always restricted yourself on whatever you do, causing your own powers to be only partially developed. I've never tried to change it, because forcing you to put all your will in something you dislike would have only brought disastrous results. Anyway, you've always been able to practice exorcism correctly, and that is the only thing we ask from you. Now, I must admit that I have been waiting for your visit for a long time and I'll gladly give you advice." Tiedoll finished with his fatherly smile.

Allen didn't know what to say. For all this time, he had thought that he had one of the lowest spiritual energies among all living beings, and now he was told that it was because he had been restricting himself? But Kanda kept saying that he wasn't worth anything, and Allen was pretty sure that his shikigami didn't have a bad energy sensing. So, every time he pissed Allen off with his cynical remarks was purely to annoy him?

_Kanda, you're a jerk._

"I'll take your silence as consent?" Tiedoll asked, amused.

"Y-yes, Professor, please!" Allen hurriedly replied.

"Very well! I'm glad, I'm really glad you came here, my boy. Well, as I said before, the one thing you need to focus on is how to fully use your abilities. Until now, I suppose you've always done what you thought was your best, but unconsciously, you held part of your spiritual energy back. I believe the best training for you is to meditate alone in order to empty your mind and let the stream of energy flow in you freely. This is something I cannot help you with; you'll have to do it alone. When you think your state of mind allows you to practice, then practice. Of course, it will take weeks before you achieve something really noticeable. Do you understand?"

"I think, Professor. Although it's hard for me to believe that I'm actually… blocking my own spiritual energy," Allen replied, rather confused.

"Do not worry. Just do as I told you and do not hesitate to come and see me again whenever you need something," Tiedoll offered.

"Thank you, Professor. I'm sorry I've taken some of your time. I shall take my leave now." Allen bowed before getting up and leaving, while his old teacher merely waved his hand, grinning.

Not that far away, though unnoticed by Allen, Kanda was leaning against a pillar, crossed-arm and displaying something quite close to a very, very faint smile on his lips.

* * *

A spiky-haired girl was humming softly.

"You seem to be in a good mood," the person who was sitting next to her said.

"Well, I got to see the new owner of the monk's blood, and I must say he's pretty cute. I'll have a lot of fun killing him," the girl replied cheerfully.

"But for now, the Earl told us to wait. He's already in a bad mood because of Jasdevi's reckless behavior, so we shouldn't upset him more. How is his wound doing, by the way?"

"It's nothing serious. Anyway, I'm really looking forward to playing with that new Exorcist."

"And I'm really looking forward to seeing that bastard's face when we kill his master," the person added with an eerie grin.

"You're scary sometimes, Tyki," the girl added, laughing.

"I could say the same to you, my dear Road," the said Tyki replied, his grin turning to an elegant smile.

* * *

^^° Nothing much happened in this chapter, I know. I'll post the next chapter very soon as an apology for making you wait so long. You'll learn some stuff about Kanda's past :]


	6. The Last One

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's.

Thanks to **Klappy** for beta-ing the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 6 – The last one**

The best place Allen could think of to meditate was of course in the garden, under his favorite white pine. The temperature that afternoon was pleasant, despite the fact it was mid-autumn, and Allen sat in the shadow of the green-yellowish tree, cross-legged and his back straight. He closed his eyes and tried to empty his mind, not paying attention to the sound of the breeze in the trees' leaves or to the water falling in the hollow of a bamboo stick, or to the sweet scent of the pine above him. Trying not to think of a certain black-haired youkai.

He had to feel the stream of spiritual energy inside him and let it loose; he had to find where it was unsteady, and reinforce it. It would take time, because Allen had never tried that before, and no one would be able to help him do it. For at least half an hour, he tried to sense his own energy within his body but only managed to hear the heartbeat in his chest and the soft sound of his breathing.

It frustrated Allen. Of course, he hadn't expected to be able to succeed right at the first time, but still, why was it so difficult to feel one's own energy? Allen took a deep breath in, and concentrated again.

_Feel it._

_Sense it._

Like a wavering flame, Allen felt something stir inside him, though weakly._Got it_. Allen focused his mind on that hesitating sensation, trying not to lose it; and as he made an attempt at concentrating more on it, he suddenly understood what Tiedoll had told him. Indeed, his spiritual energy was a mess. Part of it was flowing freely in him while the other part struggled against Allen's own unconscious will. To Allen, it was exactly as if he was trying to walk forward and backward at the same time; he was using his powers while not using them.

Now what was left to do was to manage to lift the restrictions he had erected. _I want to use my full powers,_he thought strongly. Nothing. Of course it wasn't going to be that simple. Then he suddenly remembered what Professor Tiedoll had once said during his classes when Allen was still a student.

"_A problem is solved only when the origins of that problem have been taken care of. When a person is possessed by a demon, not only do you have to exorcise it, but you also need to find out why that demon chose to possess that particular person in order for them not to be possessed again. If it was a parasitic demon, then find its nest and destroy it. If it was a youkai which held a grudge against the person, make sure they didn't offend any other youkai. Find the source of the problem, and deal with it."_

The source of the problem. In Allen's case, the problem wasn't a youkai, but himself. According to his teacher, he had been blocking his own powers since… since when? Since he was born? Nonsense. He didn't even know he had the talent to become an Exorcist before being taken to the Temple of the Black Order. The boy's thoughts then slowly drifted to his first days at the Temple, how the nightmare had begun from then, how he absolutely refused to learn exorcism, how the other students looked down on him, how he wished to escape from that place to go back to his friends at Nara's, how he wished to remain locked in his room after he had learnt about their deaths, and how his hatred of youkai had been growing from that moment, deepening his resolve not to have anything to do with those monsters.

And then the obviousness of the answer came to Allen. It was as clear as the water flowing down the bamboo stick into the pond of the garden: he didn't want to feel pain anymore. He had always hoped not to be sent on difficult requests, thus he had always unconsciously suppressed his powers. He feared that, by fighting youkai, the painful memories he kept within him would never fade. For any other person than him, that kind of fear would seem absolutely absurd, but not everyone had faced the trauma of having close persons die by the hand of demons.

The origin of the problem was his self.

"Seems like you've noticed what's the problem with you." An arrogant voice suddenly rose next to him.

Allen jumped and opened his eyes. He didn't even need to turn his head to the one who had interrupted him to know who it was.

"Kanda for heaven's sake, don't startle me like that!" the silver-haired boy said grumpily. "And what did you mean by that?"

"Simply that it took you some time to realize that you've been limiting your own energy," Kanda replied, shrugging.

Surprised, Allen looked at his shikigami who was standing next to him, gazing somewhere else, long and black hair loose in the soft breeze. The boy quickly shook his head. Someday he would stop contemplating Kanda every time he saw him, he promised himself.

"You knew?" he went on.

"Che, of course."

"Then… why do you keep saying that I've got almost no spiritual energy?" Allen asked, slightly annoyed. "Why didn't you tell me first?"

"It's not my problem what you do with your powers."

"But you keep complaining that you're oh so powerful that I don't deserve you," the boy retorted with clear irony in his tone.

"You sure don't, even if you used your full powers. Unfortunately for me, it is my duty to protect you, no matter how weak you are," Kanda replied casually.

Allen was about to snap back but stopped at the last second and remained silent. Kanda's last sentence suddenly reminded him that he had plenty of questions to ask his shikigami, especially about their last request.

"Say, Kanda. The wolf which attacked me yesterday seemed to know you. How come?" the boy asked.

"Che, obviously because we met before."

"You mean, before you were sealed? For that long?"

"Idiot. I fought against that youkai when I served under your previous ancestor."

Allen looked at Kanda questioningly.

"What do you mean, 'previous ancestor'?" That question earned him an exasperated look and a sigh from the shikigami.

"What exactly do you know about me?" Kanda asked, catching Allen unawares.

"Huh? Well… you were sealed in an altar for centuries by a monk who cursed you in a way that only a person of the monk's blood could free you. At least, that's what Komui told me," the boy replied.

"Che. Then his information is incomplete."

"Incomplete? Why?"

Kanda let out another sigh, visibly annoyed, and sat down under the tree, right next to Allen. Their shoulders brushed, but Allen forced himself to ignore the sudden warmth seizing him.

"I'm in a good mood so I'll tell you," he went on. "That stupid monk who cursed me wanted to make sure I'd pay for all the lives I had taken. So he sealed me in that altar, saying that only people of his lineage would be able to find it, and only at midnight. If one of them were to find me, they could choose between making me their shikigami or seal me again until another person finds me."

"I know that, that's what K—"

"Shut up or I'll stop the explanation there." Kanda interrupted Allen sharply, who scowled a bit but nodded anyway. "What your superior doesn't know is that the curse will be lifted only after I serve nine Exorcists. After each of the first eight dies, I am sealed back in that freaking altar until someone else finds it. "

"Nine? Then I'm not the first one to have freed you?" Somehow Allen felt slightly disappointed, though he couldn't exactly tell why.

"Che, of course not. You're the ninth."

"The ninth? Which means that after me… you'll be definitely free?"

"You do have a brain sometimes," Kanda answered with a smirk, but Allen ignored the comment. After him, there would be no one anymore. Allen was the last. Knowing that didn't really change anything for the boy, but he suddenly felt an inexplicable satisfaction while knowing there wouldn't be any other after him. Allen would be the last to be bonded to Kanda.

"But… if you had eight masters before me… just how old are you?" Allen spoke again.

"I don't bother with such futilities," the youkai replied with disdain.

"And whenever an Exorcist found you, you had to serve him until he died of old age?"

To Allen's surprise, Kanda sneered at the question.

"Not quite so," he replied. "Originally, the monk only cursed me so I'd lose my powers if the Exorcist were to die by the hand of any youkai. I must say that was pretty dumb of him."

"W-what do you mean?" Allen asked hesitantly, though he started having a faint idea of what Kanda meant; which was confirmed by his reply:

"Well, if I have to make sure that you Exorcists won't be directly killed by youkai, it doesn't mean that you can't die_indirectly_because of them. For example…" Kanda turned to Allen with an eerie smirk on his lips and suddenly grabbed the boy by the neck, making him gasp for air. Then he murmured at Allen's ear:

"… I could kindly offer you some tea, and you'd drink it without knowing that it was – unfortunately for you – poisoned. What do you think happened to the two first Exorcists? The poor things died without even knowing that I had killed them."

Allen was desperately trying to free himself from Kanda's strong grip, panic written all over his face.

"Let… me… go…" he managed to articulate. And again, to his surprise, Kanda immediately let go though he was visibly pretty amused. Allen quickly stood up and stepped back. "D-don't get near me! If you do—"

"Then what? You'll scream like a defenseless girl? Go on, I'd like to see that," Kanda replied as he got up and walked towards Allen.

"Don't get closer!" Allen repeated, now angry. "You're horrible, simply horrible! Just how many people do you need to kill before you're satisfied?"

"I'll never be satisfied," the youkai replied, drawing a dark grin and still walking to the boy who kept stepping back. "You don't know how much pleasure I can get each time I kill someone." Then, with a more casual voice, he added: "Though I must admit that I didn't particularly felt very proud of myself when I poisoned those two. I dislike using a method such as poisoning, it's treacherous, it's sly and it's absolutely unworthy of me, but well, at that time the only thing I wanted was to get rid of them as quickly as possible."

Allen's face was pallid. He didn't know if he wanted to throw up or to jump at Kanda and kill him, or maybe both at the same time. His body was shaking out of anger – and maybe fear – as he kept stepping back. And then, he froze as Kanda caught him by the waist with one hand and suddenly pulled him closer while lifting his face with his other hand.

"Making you angry is still as entertaining as ever," Kanda said with a smirk.

Allen opened his eyes wide and blushed involuntarily because of the closeness of their faces. How many times did he end up like that, and at each time, he couldn't control his speeding heartbeat or the growing warmth on his cheeks. Why, why, why? Why did Kanda make him react like that every time? How could he forget his anger as soon as he plunged his eyes in that demon's? And why, hell why did he feel so_attracted_to him? How could an incarnation of evil have such gorgeous features?

"Well? No harsh words coming from that sweet mouth of yours or any attempt at struggling?" Kanda asked with an almost_seductive_tone, which made Allen shiver. No, he was imagining things. Allen was so disoriented by the effect Kanda had on him that he was beginning to imagine silly things, and that made him want to hit himself.

"Che, not very talkative." Kanda leant a bit closer to Allen and added, his lips right beside the corner of the boy's mouth: "Or maybe you're once again too absorbed by my superior being, Moyashi." It was almost like a whisper, and Allen shivered again. He thought he was going to faint as his heartbeat increased even more – was it even possible? But what made Allen believe he was going to have a heart attack was when Kanda licked the corner of his lips. The boy jumped and violently pushed Kanda away, more than shocked.

"Wh-wh-what did you do that for!" he exclaimed as he put his fingers on the slightly wet spot.

"Felt like it. It's interesting how humans can react sometimes," Kanda merely replied. And, ignoring Allen's outraged look, he walked back under the tree and leant against the trunk, crossing his arms. "That put aside, do you want to know the rest of the story?"

Allen, who was still partly stunned, took some time to register what Kanda was talking about. How could his shikigami act as if nothing had happened! While he was simply standing against the pine looking at Allen, the latter was trying to take his breath back and calm down.

"F-fine," he finally managed to articulate. "So you killed all the previous Exorcists and you plan to do the same with me."

"I take back what I said earlier. You're actually pretty stupid, Moyashi."

"The name's Allen! You're the one with no brain if you can't even remember that, Bakanda!"

"Shut up. A shrimp is a shrimp, that's all. And do you plan to stand there like a fool?"

"I'm perfectly fine where I am," Allen replied dryly as he sat down on the spot. "Now do you mind getting back to the story?" he asked with obvious irritation.

"Che. As I was saying, you are stupid. I told you I killed the two first Exorcists only, can't you guess why?"

Allen merely shrugged and looked somewhere else. Kanda went on:

"The third one was cleverer. He immediately understood that I could kill him without losing my powers, and since he was pretty strong – unlike you – he completed the curse that monk had put on me. You saw the tattoo on my chest; it appeared when the monk cursed me and grew bigger when the third Exorcist added his own curse."

The silver-haired boy looked at his shikigami again, intrigued by his cool tone as he was speaking. It was as if he didn't care anymore if he was cursed or not._Well of course, since I'm the last one and after that, he'll be free._

"That damn Exorcist applied a powerful charm on me, binding me to an oath which renders me unable to nourish any killing intent towards the one I am supposed to serve. Of course, if I still were to try and break the oath, I'd lose my powers."

"Are you that obsessed with your powers?" Allen interrupted with a hint of exasperation. "I mean, it's not like you're going to die or something, why can't you simply live without your powers?"

"That's why I keep saying you're stupid," the black-haired youkai replied. Then, after a second of silence, he gazed straight into Allen's grey eyes and he went on, his face darkening: "I'm a demon. Asking me to live without any power is the same as asking me to die. But a wimp like you couldn't possibly understand that."

"No, I don't, and I'm glad I don't," Allen snapped back. "Anyway, now that I know a bit more about your wonderful past, let's get back to the topic. That wolf demon. You said you've met it when you were still serving under the previous Exorcist. And then?"

Kanda let out a sigh.

"Talking like this is tiring me. We'll resume later," he said as he started walking back.

"No, I want to know." Allen stopped him, standing up. "That wolf aimed at me, calling me the 'owner of the monk's blood', meaning that it knew who I am. Care to explain how it knew?"

"Che, and here I thought you were too terrified by it to remember what it said," Kanda said with a smirk.

"I don't care about your sarcasms. Just answer me," Allen demanded.

"You're a pain in the neck, Moyashi. I said later," the youkai replied as he resumed walking.

Allen caught up with the youkai.

"Tell me now."

Kanda pinched his lips, visibly irritated, then finally replied:

"We're going to see your superior."

"Komui? Why?"

"Just shut up and come if you want to kno,." Kanda replied sharply as he resumed walking. Of course Allen followed, intrigued.

When they reached Komui's working room, Allen knocked on the door, waited for the reply and slid the panel open. His superior was sitting in front of his low table, writing. He raised his head and greeted Allen with a warm smile:

"Allen! What brings you here again?" he asked as he nodded at Kanda.

"Ah, well… actually Kanda was the one who wanted to come here," Allen replied.

"Really? Well, Kanda, is there something I can do for you?" Komui addressed the youkai in front of him while motioning both of them to sit down.

"Have you heard about the demon which calls itself the Earl?" Kanda asked as an answer.

"The Earl? No. What about it?"

"That guy's after me. And before you ask me why you would care about it, let me tell you that in order to get me, the Earl will have to kill the brat here first so I'll lose all my powers and become vulnerable," Kanda said as he totally ignored the glare said 'brat' threw at him.

Komui looked particularly skeptical.

"Do you mind telling me more details about that Earl and why would he be after you or why you are suddenly telling me this?"

"Che. The demon which attacked us two days ago was one of the Earl's underlings. And I've been sensing the presence of several of them for quite some time now." Then looking at Komui with his arrogant eyes, Kanda added coldly: "I want to hunt them down and kill them all."

The tone made Allen shiver a bit, and even Komui was also slightly surprised by it.

"Wait, wait, wait." The man went on. "This is still pretty unclear. Are you telling me that the Earl have been waiting for you to revive for God knows how many centuries?"

"No. He appeared when I was serving under the previous Exorcist a hundred and sixty-two years ago but he was defeated and sealed by that Exorcist. The—"

"Previous Exorcist? What do you mean?" Komui cut him short, only to earn an annoyed look from Kanda. Allen hurriedly intervened:

"I'll tell you about that later, Komui."

"As I said, the Earl was sealed," Kanda resumed, visibly impatient to be done with it. "However, the seal was supposed to lose its effect sooner or later, for the Earl possesses high demonic powers."

Allen glanced at his shikigami. If even Kanda said that the Earl was powerful, it meant that there was going to be serious problems coming. He wanted to ask him something, but Komui anticipated his thought:

"So at that time, you weren't able to defeat that Earl?" he asked.

As expected, Kanda snorted while giving Komui his most dangerous glare, but didn't deign to reply. The other man sighed:

"Ok, one more question: why is the Earl after you?"

"Obviously because I'm the only one worthy to be his opponent. Last time I met that guy, he wanted to massacre as many humans as possible to show them the superiority of youkai over humans. I was the only one who could stop him and his underlings," Kanda replied with the most natural tone possible.

"But your master only managed to seal the Earl," Komui pointed out again.

"Because the Exorcist I served was too weak," Kanda snapped back immediately.

Allen couldn't help but emit a strange noise, which made Kanda glare at him.

"But at least, he didn't have any problem with his spiritual energy, unlike you, Moyashi."

"The name's Allen, Bakanda!"

"Dare call me that once more and I'll shave your old man hair," the youkai replied with a threatening tone.

"Please, calm down," Komui tried to intervene. Then he let out a small sigh. "Kanda, what do you expect me to do?"

"Just send this brat on a demon hunt. The Earl will surely send some demons after him, and I'll take care of them. He'll end up showing his sorry face to me."

"Basically, you want to lure him to you?" Komui asked. "Sorry but I can't afford that. If what you say is true, then nothing can guarantee Allen's safety. There's no way I'm going to send him to his death."

"Are you deaf? I told you my duty is to protect the kid; and I'll do it!" Kanda raised his voice. "As long as he doesn't hinder me, I'll finish the Earl off in a minute."

"Well if you don't want me to hinder you, I could stay here and wait patiently for you to kill that Earl. And if you were really able to kill it in a minute, why didn't you do so the last time?" Allen cut him short, visibly hurt by Kanda's words.

"Idiot. I didn't kill the Earl the last time because your predecessor prevented me from doing it. And I need you to come as bait. You're their target," the youkai replied with contempt.

"Kanda, I refuse." Komui spoke again before Allen could reply, then turned to the boy: "Allen, your level isn't high enough for me to send you on any demon hunt; do not feel hurt by my words, though."

The silver-haired boy shook his head.

"Don't worry. I'm well aware of it myself."

"Then I'll freaking train him myself!" Kanda said as he stood up abruptly. Allen and Komui looked at him with surprise.

"What are you saying?" the latter asked.

"If this damn brat is too weak, I'll train him since there's no competent teacher in this place who can do it. As we talk now, the Earl may be sending some youkai everywhere to kill humans. I bet the villages which have been destroyed so far are his doing. Do you want to waste any more time chatting?" Kanda asked icily.

After a few seconds of silence, Allen spoke hesitantly:

"Komui, I-I think Kanda's right. We can't afford to waste time here. I'm willing to train to get stronger."

The older man looked at him with tired eyes, then bit his lower lip and finally turned to Kanda:

"How much time do you need?"

"It'll depend on that brat, but give me twenty days."

"That's short!" Allen exclaimed as Komui said: "It's too long!"

The black-haired youkai snorted again and looked down on Komui, who was still sitting:

"I already offered to let me go now. Now if you don't want to have to worry about the kid, you'll have to wait twenty days. Send out other Exorcists meanwhile if you want to, but the Earl won't show his face unless the monk's descendant appears."

Komui was visibly thinking hard about the right decision to make. Seeing it, Allen spoke:

"It's ok, Komui. We don't have much choice anyway."

The man looked at those grey eyes silently, and finally let out a heavy sigh.

"Fine."

"Che," was Kanda's last reply before he turned on his heels and left the room. Allen stood up, quickly bowed at Komui and hurried outside after his shikigami.

"Wait for me, Kanda!" Allen called out as he caught up to him. "Hey, what did you mean earlier when you said my predecessor prevented you from killing the Earl?"

"Exactly what I said," Kanda replied dryly.

"But why?"

"Because he was stupid, like all of you humans."

Allen looked at his shikigami, frowning. He didn't understand, but he knew that Kanda wouldn't add anything else, so he gave up on the topic. Maybe Kanda would tell him later.

"By the way, are twenty days really going to be enough?" the silver-haired boy resumed. "I mean, I can't really imagine improving that much in such a short time. How can you even teach someone?"

Kanda turned his head to the boy, and a devilish smirk appeared on his lips, making Allen shudder.

"I never said 'teach'," he replied. "I said 'train'. And I'm talking about real training, not those supposedly 'trainings' you have with your friends. Compared with what you're going to suffer, those are mere recreations."

The poor silver-haired boy could only gulp.

* * *

Here. A longer chapter than the previous one (and hopefully, better). I re-read this plenty of times, but if you spotted some typos, please tell me :]  
Next chapter will be about their training :D And thx to all those who still support this story, it helps :]


	7. Training

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is Hoshino Katsura's property. And it's fucking coming back in August.

A/N: flashback is in italics

* * *

**Chapter 7 – Training**

A thin layer of snow was covering the whole Temple of the Black Order; roofs, trees, grounds, everything was tainted in white in this early winter. Some people – students, teachers or Exorcists – were lazying outside despite the rather cold weather to take some time to gaze at the sparkling whiteness around them. The atmosphere was peaceful, and some harmless youkai even came to play with the people there. A good day, indeed.

A pity a certain silver-haired boy couldn't enjoy that day.

It had been ten days since Allen Walker had been undergoing a rather tough training under the coaching of his merciless shikigami, namely Kanda. Basically, he had been suffering living hell for ten days, and right now, he was panting heavily, hiding on a tree in the middle of the forest, trying not to get caught by a bear-like youkai which was particularly determined to kill him. Allen could feel the youkai's energy and tell that it wasn't near his spot. Sitting on a snow-covered branch and resting his back against the trunk, he allowed himself to think back on the first day of his ordeal.

_The morning after their meeting with Komui, Allen found himself being woken up by Kanda before dawn, and asked grumpily as he reluctantly sat up on his futon:_

"_What on earth do you want at this hour…"_

"_Just hurry up and get dressed. We're going in the forest, and it's pretty far from here. And take this too." Kanda replied as he tossed Allen's Exorcist costume to the boy, along with a small bag._

"_Wha-why in the forest? What do you want to do there? And what's this bag for?" Allen asked, half-asleep._

"_Idiot. I said I'd train you, and I intend to do it perfectly. Now hurry up."_

"_Can't we train here? And what's the bag for?" Allen repeated._

"_Che, I told you this isn't going to be the petty games you dare call 'training' in this school. And my patience has limits so get dressed before I help you."_

"_Fine, fine. Just tell me what's this bag for, at least." Allen replied as he hurriedly obeyed._

"_Bandages and ointment. You'll need them. And water." And before Allen had time to reply, he added: "And one last thing: during this period of training you won't be eating anything for the whole day; only at night when we come back you'll be able to." And with a smirk, the black-haired youkai added: "That is, if you still have enough strength to eat."_

_At that sentence, Allen opened his eyes wide:_

"_Not eating for the whole day? How am I supposed to do that? I can't train properly if I starve!"_

"_Oh yes, you can." Kanda replied coldly. "Now let's go and stop complaining like the useless brat you are."_

_Allen twitched. 'I'll show you who is useless.' he thought as he walked out of his room, already pissed off, followed by a smirking Kanda. That kid was so easy to manipulate._

A loud noise made Allen jump. Right, it wasn't the perfect time to get distracted. Perched on his tree, the boy carefully look in the direction where the noise came from. The bear-like youkai was there, frantically searching for its prey – namely Allen – and kicking on random trees with enough violence to make most birds and youkai flee from them.

'Ok, you can do it, Allen.' The boy mentally encouraged himself, then took a deep breath in and jumped on the ground, his feet slightly sinking in the layer of snow. As soon as the youkai saw him, it rushed to him with a loud growl. Allen quickly formed a seal with his hand and uttered an incantation. Immediately, large rings of light appeared around the youkai and encircled its body, preventing it from moving; Allen knew the spell wouldn't last long so he hurriedly took a seal from his sleeve and threw it on the youkai, chanting another incantation. In front of him, the bear-like demon turned to dust in a few seconds.

Allen allowed himself to let out a small sigh of relief.

"Not too bad."a voice behind said. "Next one…"

"Oh please! For heaven's sake, just give me five minutes to rest!" Allen cut his shikigami with an exasperate tone as he turned to him. The boy was clearly tired, his cheeks red from hunting youkai for hours. The only advantage of that training was that he wasn't cold, despite the low temperature outside.

Kanda was leaning against a tree, arms crossed, and stared at the boy for a few seconds before talking again:

"Che, I suppose you deserved it. Five minutes, no more."

The young Exorcist merely shrugged as he walked to Kanda, then leant down and grasped the flask of water at his feet. He sat down next to the youkai, drank a mouthful, then leant his head against the trunk and closed his eyes.

_It was still dark outside, though the sun had started rising. At the entrance of the forest, Allen suddenly asked his shikigami:_

"_Hey, you said we're going somewhere far from here. Where exactly?"_

_Kanda didn't reply, much to the boy's annoyance. Allen called him out again, more loudly this time:_

"_Hey! I asked you…"_

"_You'll see when we get there, and I suggest that you don't lazy too much." Kanda cut him sharply._

"_Being nice sometimes won't kill you…" the boy mumbled. The youkai merely glanced at him, not answering._

_They walked for more than an hour, not following the path, but instead going deep into the forest, which didn't really reassure Allen, since there was no way he could find his way back if he were to be left alone there. So he simply made sure to stay as close to Kanda as possible, and to keep up with the youkai's pace. They walked without saying anything all the way, though it embarrassed neither of them for both would rather remain silent than wasting their saliva on useless talks. And the forest was never completely silent, anyway, and Allen found himself enjoying the sound of the lively surroundings, or breathing in the multiple scents around him._

_Suddenly, Allen stopped walking and started looking around him, on his guards. Kanda glanced at him from the corner of his eye, then smirked._

"_So you felt it, huh?" the youkai said. "Very well, this will be a good spot to start your training."_

"_What do you mean? There's a youkai somewhere around here with more spiritual energy than all the other youkai you usually find in this forest. I have to inform the Temple about it!" Allen retorted._

"_Idiot. Who ever said there were only weaklings in this forest? If you've never felt that before, it's merely because you don't go that deep into it. And you are not going to inform anyone about it, you're going to eliminate that youkai. Since I'm very kind, I'll keep the bag for you."_

"_Wh-what? You want me to get rid of it without any reason?" the boy asked, obviously not wanting to comply._

"_The reason is to train you. Now find it and bring me back its corpse." Kanda replied, shrugging._

_This was definitely not the kind of training Allen had expected. He had thought he'd had to spare with Kanda, or something like that, but he was certainly not prepared to kill off youkai on his shikigami's orders. Allen stood in front of Kanda and stared right in his eyes._

"_Certainly not. I've never fought something with that amount of spiritual energy, and the Temple taught me not to attack youkai without any valid reason." he said. Kanda smirked:_

"_And here I thought the moyashi hated youkai enough to kill them without any hesitation."_

_Allen twitched but snapped back anyway:_

"_Shut up, Bakanda! Unlike you, I don't kill simply because I feel like it!"_

"_Very well. You want a valid reason? I'll give you one."_

_And without adding another word, and under a wide-eyed Allen, Kanda held out his arm in front of him and spoke a single word:_

"_Mugen."_

_A green light appeared in his palm, and took the long shape of a katana. As the light faded, Allen saw that it was that same blade Kanda had used during their last mission, but he didn't have time to think about anything else, as Kanda grabbed the hilt of the katana and slashed the air in front of him, releasing a blast which hit right on a tree nearby._

"_What did you…" Allen couldn't finish his sentence as a low growl rose, coming from the direction where Kanda's attack hit, and the boy gasped when he saw the youkai appearing from behind the trees, visibly pretty upset. It looked like a worm, except that it had the size an adult human being, was standing on what could be called a pair of legs, had two long arms which ended with claws, had a single huge eye in the middle of its body, and above all, there was an enormous mouth at the top of the body. A mouth with sharp fangs. Allen decided that it actually didn't look like a worm at all._

"_Now you have a reason." Kanda interrupted his thoughts. "If you don't get rid of it, it'll devour you." he explained as if it was the most natural thing in the world._

"_B-b-but you can't let me die or you'll lose you powers!" Allen said, panicked. He stepped back as the youkai was rushing to him – too quickly – and bumped into Kanda._

"_Indeed, I won't let you die. But it doesn't mean I won't let you get hurt. Now get to work, it's coming." Kanda said as he withdrew and jumped on a tree branch, observing the boy who glared at him with all his might, but soon focused his attention on the irritated worm-like youkai which had every intention to turn Allen into its meal._

"_What kind of training is that!!!" he shouted as he started running, chased by the growling youkai._

"_Facing actual danger is the best way to force you to release your spiritual energy, idiot." Kanda replied, visibly enjoying himself._

_The youkai plunged its head, or rather, its mouth, but Allen managed to dodge. He silently cursed his shikigami; unfortunately he didn't have much time to think about anything else but how to defeat that monster. He took a seal inside one of his sleeves, still running, then turned round and chanted an incantation as he threw the seal to the youkai. The small piece of paper exploded, but it was too small an explosion to stop the youkai; instead, that irritated it even more._

"_Damn it!" Allen cursed. From the corner of his eye, he could see Kanda following him by jumping from tree to tree. It was during that second of inattentiveness that a sharp claw plunged on him. Allen gasped as he barely had time to see it coming and tried to dodge, but wasn't quick enough and he soon felt pain in his right arm. His white sleeve started getting dyed in red._

_Allen fell on his knees under the pain and shut his eyes tight. Then he heard a slashing sound, a loud growl, something falling on the ground, and nothing. The boy slowly opened his eyes and raised his head, to find himself facing Kanda, who was standing right in front of him, looking down on him with his icy dark blue eyes. Behind him, the dead youkai was lying in a pool a blue liquid flowing from a clear cut on its body, probably its blood._

"_Stand up." Kanda's harsh voice made Allen slightly jump._

_The boy obeyed, though his legs were shaking a bit, and he winced under the pain in his arm. Kanda grabbed it and examined the injury._

"_A mere scratch. Here." he said as he picked a strip of fabric in the bag he was holding and quickly bandaged Allen's arm._

"_Th-thanks." the boy stuttered, confused. He didn't have expected Kanda to take care of his injury, even if it was a mere bandage._

"_Don't thank me too quickly, Moyashi. You're going back to work right now."_

"_Huh? But you saw I can't handle youkai of that level, Bakanda!"_

"_Even the lamest of Exorcists can handle that, as long as they don't repress their energy like you. You need to face real danger in order to lift your damn barriers."_

"_Well, sorry but Professor Tiedoll told me the best way to do it was to medidate." Allen snapped back._

"_Yeah, right. And did he tell you how long it would take? Based on what I saw of how you meditate, you wouldn't be done after a year, idiot. This is the quickest way."_

"_I can't." Allen replied stubbornly. Immediately, Kanda gripped him by the collar, and asked icily:_

"_And who was the one who cried like a baby because a person died on him? Who's the one who said he wanted to get stronger? Where did all your hatred for youkai disappear to? Is your resolve that low, useless Exorcist?"_

_Kanda's words hit straight at Allen's face. The boy looked away, unable to face the demon's insensitive look. Yes, he wanted to become stronger; yes, he didn't want to see anyone dying in front of him while he couldn't do anything; and yes, he still despised youkai because of what they had done to him. So why couldn't he fight properly? Allen bit his lower lip as he couldn't find an answer to that question. Kanda roughly shook him by the collar:_

"_I'm waiting, brat." His voice brought Allen back to reality. The silver-haired gulped, then still not looking at his shikigami, finally managed to articulate:_

"_Fine, I'll do it."_

"_Che." was Kanda's only answer as he dropped the boy on the ground. Then, as if nothing had happened, he went on: "This area swarms with more than enough youkai for you to train. Let's resume, shall we?" he added with a smirk as a new youkai appeared in front of them._

"Enough slacking, Moyashi. Get back to work or you'll freeze on the spot." Kanda's voice interrupted the boy's thoughts once more.

"It's Allen, Bakanda." he answered almost automatically, then reluctantly stood up and stretched his arms and neck. "You know, at that pace there won't be any single youkai left in this forest."

"At that pace? Don't kid me, you're still as slow as a turtle, Moyashi." Kanda replied with disdain.

"Allen. And it's only been ten days since I started."

"Meaning that you only have ten days left to improve. Now stop talking and get back to work."

Allen muttered something which greatly sounded like 'workaholic' and started scanning the area with his energy sensing, looking for some youkai to exorcise. It had been like that for the whole ten days; finding demons, killing them, then finding new ones, killing them and so on. At first, Kanda had been the one to find them, but now, the only thing he did was to follow the boy and sometimes – rarely – helping him if he had troubles.

_Allen couldn't tell how many of them he had faced on that day, and most of them had ended up being killed by Kanda. The young Exorcist couldn't tell whether his shikigami was pissed off by his poor results or no, since his face didn't show any sign of approval or disapproval. The poor boy was exhausted, he could barely stand on his feet and he felt as if all his spiritual energy had been drained by the 'training'. And on top of that, he was hungry. As Kanda had said in the morning, he didn't get any meal for the whole day, and now his stomach was begging to be stuffed with anything edible._

_Allen leant against a tree, the remains of a slain youkai at his feet. He raised his eyes; he could see the orange sky through the tree branches and deduce that evening was near. He turned his grey eyes to Kanda, who glanced at him then let out a small sigh:_

"_I guess you won't be able to do anything more today. Let's head back." he said as he started walking._

_Allen quickly followed him, but after a few minutes he found himself struggling not to fall while trying to keep up with Kanda's pace, as his legs seemed to refuse to carry him any farther. And what had to happen happened: he tripped, only to be stopped during his fall by Kanda's arm._

"_Oi, can't you even walk properly?" the youkai asked, annoyed._

"_S-Sorry, I tripped." Allen answered as he stood back and dusted his robe off._

"_Che."_

_They resumed walking silently for several minutes, before Allen's legs gave up on him once more. This time, Kanda immediately caught the boy by the waist with one arm, saying grumpily:_

"_Oi useless Moyashi, we'll never get back if you keep falling like that."_

"_Sorry… I wasn't looking at where I was walking." Allen replied in a weary tone. "I'll pay attention now."_

_Kanda let out a sigh of irritation, and before Allen could say or do anything else, he put his other arm behind the boy's knees and lifted him up._

"_W-what are you doing, Kanda? It's fine, I can walk by myself! Let me down!" Allen exclaimed._

"_Shut up. And hold on to me." Kanda cut him._

"_Wh-__" __ Allen gasped as his shikigami jumped on tree branch, then started jumping from a tree to another, careful to avoid getting scratched. Unconsciously, Allen gripped Kanda's kimono and snuggled closer to him, feeling the warmth of his body on one side of his face, and the cold wind on the other side as Kanda was moving. It felt nice being held by these strong arms, even if they were a demon's arms._

_Allen tried hard to keep his eyes open, but the numbness of his limbs along with the exhaustion of his mind put too much strain on him, and Kanda's swift and silent movements didn't particularly help him remain awoken. He ended up dozing off_.

"Idiot! Open your eyes!" Kanda snapped.

Allen obeyed, and to his dismay, he saw six youkai approaching him dangerously. He silently cursed his lack of attention which had preventing him from sensing them. Not one, but six! He had never dealt with six youkai at the same time before, and those ones seemed to be at least at the same level of the previous one.

"What were you thinking, letting your energy flow freely like that? Those stupid youkai were lured by that energy – not that it's very high, anyway." the black-haired demon went on. "Oh, fine. Just deal with them. That will teach you."

Allen ignored the comment about his level of energy. He knew that he wasn't potentially weak, according to what his professor had told him; he simply needed to fully use all his avalaible energy, which he still wasn't able to do, even if there had been some progress.

'Ok, so what do I do when I'm facing several youkai like this?' Allen tried to remember his lessons at the Temple, though he didn't have much time to think as a first youkai charged at him. 'A barrier. I need a barrier.' Now the problem was whether he would be able to create a large and powerful barrier enough to contain the six. 'Only one way to know.'

Allen formed a new seal with his hands and gathered his energy to create a barrier and pronounced the word to cast it. A thin, pale blue and transparent wall appeared and surrounded the youkai, enclosing them in a luminous dome though it wasn't very stable and threatened to collapse under the repeated attacks of the angry demons. Allen gritted his teeth and frowned in concentration; a drop of sweat fell from his temple to the ground.

"I'll be nice today." he heard Kanda say behind him. "Make your shield strong enough to contain them and I'll call it a day."

Very well. That only strengthened Allen's will to be done with them. He concentrated even more, trying to reinforce the barrier where it was the weakest, to ignore the furious growls of the enclosed youkai which kept hitting against it, to focus only on putting his energy in what he was doing.

"Not bad. Now keep it like this for twenty seconds and I'll consider you succeeded." Kanda spoke again.

Twenty seconds, huh? Fine. Allen started counting in head, trying not to lose his concentration on the barrier. The repeated assault against it made the boy flinch and put a knee on the snow-covered ground; but the shield held out. _'Ten more seconds.'_ A new drop of sweat fell to the ground. _'Eight… seven…'_ A thought crossed Allen's mind: what was he going to do after those twenty seconds? If he released his barrier, he would become cold meat. _'Damn it, do I have to fight them anyway? I don't have enough strength left for that!'_ At the same moment, he heard his shikigami's voice behind him:

"Twenty."

And with no further warning, Kanda jumped in the barrier and slashed the six youkai in an instant with Mugen as if they were mere tree leaves. Allen, stunned, dropped on the ground, his barrier vanishing around Kanda who turned his dark blue eyes to the boy then smirked as he saw the face Allen was pulling.

"How did you manage to go through my barrier?" the latter asked, frowning.

"Che. That level of barrier is nothing to me. Anyway, get up and let's head back" Kanda merely replied.

Muttering under his breath, Allen slowly stood up and winced as almost all the muscles in his body ached and screamed for rest. Like every evening. He quickly removed the snow on his robe and caught up to Kanda who had already started heading back. The fact that he was still able to walk despite being sore all over was a mystery to himself. Today, though, he felt more exhausted than usual and ended up calling his shikigami:

"Kanda, slow down a bit." he said, trying not to sound too worn out.

The black-haired youkai glanced at him, and to Allen's huge surprise, complied silently. On their way back, Allen allowed himself to think again about that first day of training.

_Allen slowly opened his eyes, to find himself in his own room, on his futon, blanket pulled over him. He sat up, still wondering how he ended up there. The room was lit only thanks to a small lamp. A familiar voice rose:_

"_Finally awake, Moyashi."_

_Right. Kanda. They were in the forest, going back to the Temple but Allen couldn't walk without tripping every three minutes, so Kanda carried him and…_

"_Kanda, did you bring me all the way here?" the boy asked, incredulous._

"_Che." The shikigami merely replied, turning his head on the side._

"_Is it late?"_

"_It's the middle of the night."_

_At that same moment, Allen's stomach made a rather loud growl, making the boy blush slightly. What time was it? He needed to go to the kitchens to take something to eat. As if Kanda could read his mind, he told the boy:_

"_Your two friends brought you a tray in case you haven't noticed."_

_Indeed, right next to Allen, a full tray of food was waiting for him, and the boy mentally thanked Lavi and Lenalee for their attention before literally devouring the whole tray._

"_Che, that's why human beings are so weak. They always need to eat if they don't want to die." Kanda said with contempt._

"_It's still better than killing others to feed on their energies." Allen snapped back, his mouth full._

"_Fool. If you were a demon, you'd understand. You'd understand the thrill when you kill someone and drain them from their energy, the excitement of chasing those desperate trash begging you to let them live, the pleasure to remove the weak from this world…" Kanda said slowly, licking his lip as he spoke, a strange glint in the eye. "And the feeling of the warm blood on you, the sight of those petrified faces as you plunge your sword in their entrails, the sweet sound of their screams and cries, that intoxicating scent of straw on fire after you burnt everything up…"_

"_Shut up."_

_Allen had stopped moving, looking at his shikigami as a sudden feeling of anger, disgust and fear rose within him. His tone had been as icy as his blood was boiling now, and the urge to beat the demon in front of him made him stood up abruptly, fists clenched, not caring about the spilled food at his feet._

"_What's your problem, Moyashi? Can't deal with the reality of having a demon as a shikigami? A pity for you, killing is in my blood." Kanda said with a smirk as he also stood up and started walking towards the silver-haired boy whose body was shaking out of fury._

"_You're not going to make me believe you said all those things simply to annoy me." he said, trying to control the anger in his voice._

_Kanda's smirk grew wider._

"_No, indeed. That was the pure truth. And it's a pity I can't experience it anymore… well that is, until you die. Then, after that…" He licked his lips once more._

_Allen felt sick as he looked at his shikigami – no, at that demon. He had never seen such a look in Kanda's eyes, and in the half-lit room, it looked even more eerie. Those were the eyes of a true demon, used to killing people and lusting to kill even more. Before Kanda came too close to him, Allen turned round and hurried away, slamming the panel shut behind him._

_He ran, not really watching where to, but he ran anyway. The only thing he wanted right now was to get as far as possible from Kanda. To his relief, he didn't hear anyone behind him, which was already a good point. Unconsciously, his steps brought him to the Temple's garden, and it was only at that moment that he noticed he was bare feet and that the floor was rather cold. Nevermind that. He stepped into the garden on the cold path of stones, taking his time to gaze at the pond in which he could see the reflection of the moon. He then raised his eyes and stared shiny spots in the dark sky, letting out a loud sigh of frustration, or was it annoyance, or tiredness, or all the three at the same time? It didn't really matter. _

_What mattered was that he had taken a bloodthirsty demon as a shikigami, and he was now realizing how much of a mistake it had been. At that moment, he wished that everything so far was a nightmare, including the fact that he was an Exorcist; he wished he would wake up soon and find himself on his futon, next to the other children he always played with at Nara's home, he wished that no Exorcist never really came to pick him up and bring him to the Temple of the Black Order._

"_If you plan to catch a cold so you'll be able to skip training, don't dream too much." the oh-too-familiar voice suddenly rose behind Allen._

_The silver-haired boy turned his head to Kanda and glared at him with a furious look on his face._

"_Give me one reason not to seal you back and…" he started icily._

"_I'm the only one who can make you stronger in no time." Kanda cut him with the same tone._

"Oi, listen when someone talks to you, Moyashi!"

Allen almost jumped as he was snatched out of his thoughts by Kanda's voice.

"It's Allen." The boy answered grumpily, his mood darkened by his thoughts.

"Tomorrow you'll train on more powerful youkai." Kanda went on, ignoring Allen. "Your energy is still not fully used, and this starts pissing me off. So you'd better be prepared."

"What's the use of making me train on more difficult targets if I can't handle them?" Allen mumbled.

"You humans are like any living thing on this earth and possess a survival instinct. Putting you in life-threatening situations will trigger that instinct and force you to erase your stupid inner barriers."

Allen didn't feel like arguing so he kept his mouth shut and both of them came back to the Temple silently. He despised Kanda, but the latter was right; he was the only one who could make him stronger.

* * *

Allen was woken up by several bangs on his door and at first thought it was Kanda, before remembering that his shikigami was still in his room, and would never bother knocking on any door.

"Allen! Allen!" Lenalee's voice called him from behind the wooden panel.

The silver-haired boy rubbed his eyes and quickly got up to open the panel.

"What is it, Lenalee?" he asked with a half-sleepy voice.

"My brother called for us." the girl replied, visibly agitated. "It seems it's an emergency, so please get dressed and come to his working room as soon as you are done." Then she turned her eyes to Kanda, who was looking at her with annoyance, and added, though with a more uncertain voice: "You too, please. My brother said he needs to see you too."

Both Kanda and Allen raised an eyebrow; the boy looked at his shikigami who merely shrugged and turned back to Lenalee:

"Fine, we're coming right away."

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Ok, I know this chapter was particularly long. But it's to celebrate my exams! I got the school I wanted, yay! So I give you all virtual cookies, champaign and juice for those who are underage :D  
Anyway, I'd be happy to receive some reviews; it takes you a minute to review something which took me hours to type :]  
And plot will (finally) be moving in next chapter ^^


	8. Release

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is Hoshino Katsura's property.

A/N: Yeah. An early update. But that's because I don't know when I'll be able to update afterwards.

* * *

**Chapter 8 – Release**

Allen had hurried to his superior's working room, anxious about which kind of emergency would require his presence as well as his shikigami's, and was now sitting among the eleven other Exorcists of the Temple, in front of Komui whose eyebrows were knitted in worry and whose look only increased Allen's fear that something really bad had happened. Kanda was standing right behind the silver-haired boy, arms crossed, waiting with slight annoyance for Komui to speak.

"I gathered all of you here because, as you may have guessed, we have a serious problem." the older man started gravely. "A messenger from the emperor arrived this morning and told us that more than half the villages around the city have been burnt down by youkai during the night. Approximatively two to three hundred people died but some villagers managed to escape and took shelter within the city, and now the emperor fears that the remaining villages will also be destroyed and that the youkai's next target will be the city itself." Komui finished, lowering his eyes.

As Komui was speaking, Allen's eyes were wide open in horror and disbelief. His whole body stiffened and he gulped silently, though it didn't go unnoticed by his shikigami.

"The emperor requested me to send all of you to the remaining villages to protect the people there. So…"

"Wouldn't it be safer to ask the villagers to move into the city? It'd be easier for us to protect them." One of the Exorcists interrupted Komui.

"Indeed, it would be easier, but the emperor does not wish for any more damage on the outskirts of his city. The fact is, all those villages and lands are necessary to supply the capital city with food and other raw materials, and now that there are only a few of them left, it has become an even greater priority to keep them as long as the surrounding fields. Now I'll assign you to your villages."

For the five next minutes, Komui gave his orders and the Exorcists started leaving the room one after another. In the end, only Allen was left, but it wasn't him Komui addressed first. It was Kanda.

"Kanda, I think I know the answer but I'll ask you anyway: do you think those attacks were the Earl's doing?"

"Che, of course." the demon replied, shrugging. Komui sighed, then went on:

"Then I can only assume that they'll be after Allen. Allen, how has your training been doing?"

The boy hesitated, not sure about what to say, but Kanda replied for him:

"The brat has improved, but it's still not sufficient." he said dryly.

"I see…" Komui answered. "Then I'll request you one last thing: please take care of Allen." he said with one last sigh.

* * *

As Allen arrived at his destination, many villagers rushed to him and Lenalee, who had been assigned the same village as him, with obvious relief on their faces. Despite the low temperature outside, it seemed that the whole village was there to welcome them; and some small children were even playing in the snow, singing that they'd be safe now the Exorcists were there.

"Thank the gods for sending you to us!" a woman carrying a baby in her arms exclaimed.

"Please, Exorcists-sama, protect us from those evil demons!" another villager almost begged them.

While Lenalee gave all of them reassuring smiles and words, Allen remained silent. How was he supposed to protect all those people when he still hadn't managed to develop his full powers? Seeing all those men, women and children looking at him with hope in their eyes left him with a very uneasy feeling. Especially after having crossed the destroyed lands and seen the burnt villages on their way here. His heart had sunk when he saw the once snow-covered lands turned into piles of rocks and uprooted trees, or the landscape scarred by heavy smoke coming from charred remains of what were formerly houses. He had bitten his lip in order not to cry, but a few tears had fell down his cheeks anyway, and Lenalee had kept sobbing all the way. To Allen's relief, Kanda hadn't said anything.

"I suggest we don't waste time and start patrolling outside." Allen wanted to avoid seeing those expectant faces. "What do you think, Lenalee?"

"Yes, you're right." the girl replied, then called out: "Shika, Tsugumo."

Immediately, two youkai appeared next to her and she addressed them:

"Shika, Tsugumo, you stay in the village. I'll be right outside. If anything happens, one of you comes and calls me, ok?"

"Sure thing." the first youkai replied.

"Got it." the second nodded.

Lenalee gave them a warm smile, then added: "You take care, as usual."

Meanwhile, Allen was watching Lenalee's two shikigami with attention. The first one, Shika, looked exactly like a huge mantis, except for the long brown mane falling on its back. The second one, Tsugumo, was a grey crane but with multicoloured feathers around its neck, like a necklace. These shikigami had nothing exceptional, but at least, they didn't argue with Lenalee all the time and didn't treat her like trash. For a second, Allen found himself wanting to possess a shikigami like them, but quickly shook the idea out of his head.

"Allen-kun, I suggest you watch the north side and I'll take the south one. Is that fine with you?" Lenalee's voice brought the boy back to reality.

"Yes, it's fine. Let's go then."

After wishing each other good luck, they separate and headed for their respective spots.

* * *

Evening was coming near and the sky had started darkening. There had been no attack for the whole day, and Allen assumed that the Earl's underlings prefered waiting until night came. He had spent whole hours patrolling his area with Kanda and was beginning to feel tired, though he didn't want to show it to his shikigami. Surprisingly enough, they didn't argue much, which helped Allen remain calm despite the fact that Kanda looked slightly tense. The boy looked at his shikigami, who was sitting on the ground, cross-legged and with his katana between his crossed arms. His eyes were closed, as if he was in a deep state of concentration, which Allen didn't mind at all. It was best when none of them spoke.

Kanda suddenly opened his eyes and Allen quickly looked away to avoid the deep gaze coming from those dark blue eyes.

"They're here."

Allen looked back at his shikigami questioningly.

"I don't feel anything." he said.

"It doesn't mean they aren't here. Stay near me." Kanda ordered, much to Allen's annoyance, but he complied anyway and stood right behind Kanda, unsuccessfully trying to sense any energy which might betray the presence of any youkai. He'd have to sharpen his energy sensing abilities later. If he managed to survive.

Right now, the boy could only look frantically around him, expecting to see a youkai jumping from one of the surrounding trees on him. The black-haired youkai noticed that and said sharply:

"I'll protect you so stop panicking like that, Moyashi."

Allen suddenly felt his cheeks growing warm at those words. Of course, it wasn't like Kanda was protecting him out of concern, but still. On the other hand, the boy was feeling more and more frustrated by his own powerlessness. Kanda had said he needed something to trigger his survival instinct in order to unblock his restrained spiritual energy. Fine. He'd use the present opportunity and show Kanda what he was able to do. That sudden self-confidence surprised himself, but everything needed a start, right?

His thoughts were interrupted as he heard a strange noise coming from right in front of him and as he watched, a small light appeared and grew bigger, taking the shape of a round sort of… portal. Allen's intuition was correct, for he saw several silhouettes coming out from that light though he couldn't see their faces because of the light behind them. He counted three opponents.

"Che, so you gathered the whole family this time?" Kanda said, smirking as he got into a fighting stance.

"Oh no, not tonight, my dear Kanda." a female voice answered. Allen saw her do a gesture, and the light disappeared. The sky wasn't dark enough and the boy managed to see the three youkai clearly.

And what shocked him the most was that they all looked human, despite their strangely dark skin and cross-shaped scars on their foreheads. Worst of all, the female voice had come from a girl! The girl looked twelve at most and was wearing a purple yukata despite the fact that it was winter, and it took Allen a few seconds to remember that they were demons. The other two were taller, two young men; the first one was almost dressed like Kanda, in a black kimono, and his foreign features were quite as handsome as his shikigami's, with curly dark hair falling elegantly on his shoulders. The second one looked less refined; he was wearing a red and black kimono, but the cut was eccentric with the top half-opened and the hakama opened in the middle. That youkai had long and blonde hair, which was a painful contrast for Allen's eyes. It spoke first:

"Hehehe, so we meet again, Kanda! And this time I swear I'll make you drown into an endless pain. That is, after I'm done with the brat hiding behind you!" it said, laughing evilly.

"Calm down, Jasdevi." The other male youkai said coolly. "Don't start rushing things like the last time or you'll end up injured because of your haste."

"Hey, don't spoil my mood, Tyki, and go to your target." the said Jasdevi mumbled.

"Tss, don't say I didn't warn you." Then, turning to the girl who had kept silent with an amused look on her face, he added: "Shall we go, Road?"

"Yes, let's hurry up so we can be back for dinner!" the girl replied happily.

Allen was literally frozen on the spot. The three youkai were chatting as if Kanda was no threat to them! What kind of demons were they?

"Oi, do you think I'll let you go freely like that?" Kanda suddenly asked with clear irritation on his face. "I'm going to kill you three in less than a minute."

"My, my, aren't we confident? I doubt you'll be able to take us three at the same time, especially if you have to protect that poor boy here." the one named Tyki said. "Oh, the poor little thing, I can barely sense his spiritual energy. Is it fear that paralyzes you like this, boy?" he kindly asked Allen.

The silver-haired boy gulped, unable to answer. Yes, it was fear. Because right now, Allen was able to sense the energy of the demon which had just talked to him. And it was awfully powerful. He couldn't tell which one was greater between Kanda's and Tyki's.

"Tyki, let's go." the girl repeated. "Leave Kanda and the boy to Jasdevi."

"Fine, fine. So I take the Chinese girl and you deal with the village?"

"That's the plan."

"Che, don't ignore me." Kanda interrupted. Then, he said to Allen: "Moyashi, don't faint like the last time. I'm releasing my energy."

"I'll be fine, Bakanda." Allen muttered, ready for the coming shockwave.

He didn't faint when Kanda let his energy burst out though he stumbled a bit, but managed to remain focused on his enemies. He even noticed the winces on their faces as Kanda released his full powers, which was encouraging.

"Hmph. If you're ready, then let's resume our fight." Jasdevi said.

Allen wondered what the demon was talking about, when he saw the said Jasdevi's body slowly transforming into something else. Fur started appearing on him, his face lengthened, his hands turned into a pair of paws which hit the ground as the demon lowered the upper part of his body. Allen gasped as he recognized the wolf which had attacked him.

"We'll come back quickly, Jasdevi." Road said. "Try not to get killed meanwhile."

She and Tyki were about to leave the third demon's side, when a flash of light made them step back.

"I said, you're not going anywhere else." Kanda's low voice rose. His katana was glowing in a green light, and without further notice, spoke two words:

"Kaichū: Ichigen."

Dozens of small youkai-shaped shafts of light escaped from Kanda's blade and flew right at the three demons, which dodged the attack. Allen was in awe, seeing his shikigami fighting for real.

"Don't make our work more difficult, Kanda." Tyki said nicely. "We're not leaving for too long anyway, just enough to kill the girl and her shikigami to prevent any help from coming then we'll be right back."

"Lenalee!" Allen gasped as he turned his heels, ready to go to where the Chinese girl was."

"You stay with me, Moyashi." Kanda ordered.

"But!"

"You won't be able to do anything for her anyway." Kanda cut him sharply.

"It's exactly like Kanda said, boy." Tyki added as he rushed forward, followed by Road.

"Don't think I'll let you pass that easily!" Kanda shouted as he readied his weapon.

"Your opponent is me, bastard!" the wolf howled and jumped towards him, forcing him to step aside. "You'd better pay attention to the brat if you don't want him to die! Not that you'll manage to keep him alive, anyway."

"Che." Kanda clicked his tongue out of frustration as he saw the two others waving goodbye at him and disappearing in the night, one into the village, the other going to Lenalee.

The next thing which made Kanda swear profusely was when he noticed the faint trace of spiritual energy which was Allen's disappearing from his sides. A mere glance behind him showed him that the boy was running after Tyki. Running _after_ Tyki. Kanda cursed even more. Was that brat suicidal or something like that? The black-haired youkai was about to chase after him when a mass of fur jumped in front of him, blocking the way.

"Oh no, no, no. You're not going anywhere. A pity for your little master, he'll die even sooner. And you'll follow him right after." the wolf added with a carnal grin, revealing his sharp fangs.

"Only in your dreams. You'll be dead in a few seconds." Kanda said before charging.

* * *

Allen was running, out of breath. Despite the sky was pitch black, he could see clearly enough not to trip over some rocks hidden by the thin layer of snow, thanks to the moonlight. He had to meet with Lenalee; she wouldn't be able to face a demon such as Tyki. What would he do when he got there? He had no idea. It was stupid from him, he knew that, but there was no way he was going to let Lenalee being killed by a youkai without doing anything. And there was the village to protect as well. He would be killed, that was for sure, but at least, he'd have to give everyone enough time to flee. But If he died, that also meant Kanda's death… No, it wasn't the time to think about that. At first, the silver-haired boy had thought he could rely on Kanda to take care of everything; however, now, he realized that he had been counting too much on his shikigami. It was time to fight by himself, to use his own powers to protect people. It was his duty as an Exorcist.

There was still a slight problem, though: he was still unable to fully use his energy. Well, that was the perfect opportunity to see if his survival instinct was of any good.

A blast caught his attention. It was Lenalee, with a youkai which greatly resembled a huge dragonfly but with no wings and a pair of legs and arms – probably one of her shikigami – already engaging a fight with Tyki. He heard her yelling:

"Makura! Get back!"

The shikigami immediately stepped back next to its master, and Lenalee cast a barrier around Tyki. For a second, Allen let out a small sigh of relief; Lenalee's specialty was shields and barriers, the demon now had no way out. The next second proved him wrong, as Tyki walked towards the stunned girl and crossed the barrier as easily as Kanda had with Allen's own one.

"Now, now, young lady." Tyki said with a charming smile. "You'll have to do better than that if you want to stop me."

"Lenalee!" Allen called her out as he ran to her.

"Allen-kun! What are you doing here? Where's Kanda?" she cried back.

"Oh? What are you doing here, indeed, boy? Maybe I should deal with you first, it'd make the task easier for Jasdevi." Tyki said as he looked at the boy with interest.

"Kanda won't be killed by that demon, even if he loses all his powers!" Allen snapped back fiercely as he joined up with Lenalee. "He's way more powerful than what you could imagine!"

Those words sounded childish, Allen was well aware of that, but he hadn't been able to stop them from coming from his mouth. Maybe, in a way, those words helped him reassure himself.

"I'm very moved by the trust you have for your shikigami, but that won't be enough to save him, boy. However, there is one point you got right: Jasdevi cannot killed Kanda, indeed. But who said we wanted to kill him? Let me tell you one thing since you are going to leave this world very soon: our only goal here is to weaken Kanda by killing his master, then bring him to the Earl. The privilege of killing Kanda will be given to him, and to none other than him." Tyki explained quietly. "Now that all details have been cleared, let's resume, shall we?"

And without waiting for an answer, he invoked a large star-shaped weapon and charged at Allen. Immediately, Lenalee's shikigami jumped between them and blocked the attack with its own weapon, a spear.

"Allen-kun, run away! You can't face him without Kanda!" Lenalee pushed the boy behind her.

"No, I can't leave you here either! He'll kill you!"

"Don't worry, I'll manage somehow. You need to escape, go back to Kanda, he'll protect you!"

"I don't care about Kanda!" Allen suddenly burst out. He was fed up with everyone thinking that his only worth was to have Kanda as his shikigami. "I can fight without him!" he went on, more violently than what he had intended at first. The Chinese girl was a bit surprised by Allen's reaction, but didn't have time to answer as a loud noise brought their attention back to duel between Makura and Tyki. The shikigami was on the ground, spear broken, unconscious. Tyki walked closer, this time with a smirk on his lips, saying:

"You were no match for me, sorry. And farewell." He raised his weapon and was about to plunge it into the body of the shikigami, when Lenalee chanted an incantation and threw a seal in Tyki's direction. The youkai merely dispelled the charm with one hand as if it was a mere piece of paper.

"Makura!!" Lenalee screamed as she quickly erected a barrier around her shikigami.

"It's useless, young lady. But don't worry, you'll be able to see your shikigami soon. I'll kill you right after I kill your dear Makura."

"No you won't!" Both Lenalee and Allen replied at the same time.

Allen formed a seal with his hands and pronounced an incantation; ropes of light emerged from the ground and bound themselves around Tyki's legs and arms, while Lenalee desperately kept casting spells at him, with no more effects than making the demon more and more annoyed.

"Fine. If you want to die that badly, I'll deal with you two Exorcists first, then finish your useless shikigami off afterwards." he said, no more smiling.

In less than a second, he broke free from Allen's binds and jumped on Lenalee, grabbing her by the neck and pinning her on the ground. Allen quickly stepped back, terrified, not knowing what to do to help his friend who was about to die.

Allen's mind was unable to form any coherent thought at that moment; he was looking everywhere around him to see if any help could come; Kanda, another Exorcist, anyone! But of course, they were alone. Sounds of explosions came from inside the village, along with screams. The villagers! They were going to die too! Lenalee's two shikigami were probably fighting against that girl, Road, and having a hard time against her. Everyone was busy against a demon, and here was Allen, standing in the middle of the fight, unable to move, to help, to act, to even think properly!

All of them were going to die, but Allen would be the only one to die without fighting. Without even trying. _'But I don't have enough power!'_ Was it a valid reason enough? Or simply an excuse to try and justify himself?

"Al-len…" Lenalee managed to articulate. "Run…"

"Now, now, don't talk or it'll be even more painful for you." Tyki cut her gently, his hand still on her neck. "I could stab you and give you a quick death, but I don't want to taint such a fine looking young lady with blood, it'd be a waste."

"Ru..n… Al…"

It was more than what Allen could stand. Even when she was about to die, the only thing she could think of was Allen's safety! Allen bit his lip. How could he be so selfish! Very well. If he were to die, then so be it. But he wouldn't die without putting up a real fight.

_Let your energy free._ Allen concentrated.

_I want to save her._ He felt his spiritual energy within him.

_I want to save them all._ He had to release his energy.

_I must save them all._

Allen felt like something exploded inside of him. Something which overwhelmed him, but didn't destabilize him like it did when Kanda released his own powers; on the contrary, Allen felt strengthened by that sudden surge of energy filling him entirely, unsuspected potential revealing itself and engulfing the boy into waves of power, putting him into a state of near ecstasy. Something that made him understand why Kanda had told him he was the same as dead without his powers. He felt more alive than ever.

"Hey, hey, what's with you, boy?" a voice suddenly brought Allen back on earth. A voice with a hint of… worry? Yes, Tyki definitely knew there was something wrong happening at the moment. Something wrong for him. His hand had loosened around Lenalee's neck, and the girl was desperately trying to fill her lungs with air though it was the last of Tyki's worries now.

"Let her go." Allen ordered. A white aura was emanating from his whole body, like the materialization of his newly released energy, and the sight of it was impressive enough to make Tyki slowly stand up and step back carefully. But a smirk soon appeared on his lips.

"It seems I've misjudged you, boy. Come, I'll gladly take you on." he said, getting into a fighting stance.

_Save her. Destroy him._

Allen held out his arm in front of him, and traced a large five-branched star in the air with his finger; the luminous star floated in front of the boy, and with a single movement of his hand, flew right at Tyki and exploded violently, making the demon fly a few meters away. It had been so quick Tyki hadn't got enough time to counter. He slowly stood up, wiping the blood at the corner of his mouth, and now the only thing which could be read in his eyes was extermination.

On his side, Allen was walking to the demon, not paying attention to Lenalee who had sat up and was staring at the boy with both fear and admiration.

_Destroy him._

He raised his hand again, ready to attack, when a shadow quickly jumped between him and Tyki. Road.

"What happened, Uncle Tyki? I felt an enormous amount of energy so I came to see…" the girl started.

"Get away, Road." the other demon cut her. "It's getting dangerous here."

"I can sense it! That's why I came. What's wrong with the boy? Not ten minutes ago I could barely feel anything from him, and now… and now… It's almost at the same level as yours or mine…"

"Get away, or you'll be hurt." Tyky repeated.

"No! I…"

She didn't have time to finish her sentence as a new blast of white light hit both of them head-on. They fell on the ground, and though their injuries were superficial, their mood weren't as playful as before.

"What the…"

"Look at him." Tyki said, pointing at Allen.

The silver-haired boy was walking to them, fists clenched, still wrapped in that luminous white aura, gazing at the two demons with unrecognizable eyes.

"It's the same look as Kanda's when we fought him a century ago." Tyki murmured. "Demon's eyes." he added, staring at Allen with more than interest. "And this aura… who could have imagined that such an amount of power was hiding in this frail body…Fascinating… coming from a mere human…"

"Uncly Tyki, this isn't what the Earl had planned. I suggest we get Jasdevi back and retreat."

"…" the demon was too busy observing Allen.

"Uncle Tyki!"

"Wha- oh, no. I want to fight him… That boy is very interesting…" he added to himself.

"Yes, yes." Road replied, slightly annoyed. "You'll have plenty of time later to fight him. Come on, we have to go and get Jas… Watch out!" she said as jumped on the side to avoid a new attack directed at them. Tyki also managed to dodge, and his eyes were locked on Allen.

"Very interesting…" he repeated, which made Road sigh.

"You'll fight him later. I can feel Kanda approaching but there's no trace of Jasdevi, so we'd better check on him first."

"Oh…" Tyki was visibly disappointed. "Fine, let's go then."

_Eradicate._

Allen pulled out several seals from his sleeves and threw them at the youkai. Road quickly erected a defensive barrier then said:

"Ok, we'll take our leave now. We'll come back for you later!"

She opened a door and both she and Tyki disappeared, right before a new explosion hit at the same spot.

"Oi, Moyashi!"

That voice? Oh, Kanda's voice. The shikigami was hurrying to Allen. The boy ignored it; he had a mission, and that was to kill every demon in the vicinity. Road and Tyki had left, probably to pick Jasdevi up and retreat, unless Allen managed to kill them all before. He could feel their presence not so far away, and started heading for their direction.

_Kill._

"Moyashi!"

_Destroy._

"Oi, where are you going!"

_Annihilate._

"Damn it, stay here!"

_Exterminate._

Those demons wouldn't remain alive for too long. He was going to erase their existence, and save all the villagers as well as Lenalee.

Kanda couldn't understand what was going on. He was fighting against Jasdevi when he suddenly felt an unbelievably huge amount of energy bursting out, which he immediately recognized as being Allen's. At first he hadn't believed it was the brat's, but he had to make sure. So he managed to knocked his opponent out and hurried to where Allen was… only to find him wrapped into a white aura, a tremendous power emanating from him, and above all, with nothing human anymore in his silver eyes. The boy's eyes were filled with determination, but a determination to kill, to slaughter and massacre… exactly like Kanda's own look when he was still free. For the hundredth time, he called the boy again:

"Moyashi! Say something, damn it!"

"Out of my way." was Allen's mere answer. Kanda had never heard such coldness in the boy's voice.

"Idiot! Get back to your senses!" the black-haired shikigami grabbed Allen at his shoulders, shaking him.

"I said, out of my way." Allen replied, sending a wave of energy at Kanda, who took the blow with no difficulty.

"Damn it!" he cursed again. That stupid brat clearly didn't intent to suppress his spiritual energy. In that case, Kanda would have to force him to do it. The shikigami tightly wrapped his arms around the boy and started using his own energy to envelop Allen's one and force it to subside. Kanda mentally cursed the boy's strength to resist.

"Idiot!" he said. "You said you wanted to save her, and look at what you've done. She passed out because she couldn't stand your spiritual energy! And look around you! You almost destroyed everything with your damn attacks!"

At those words, he felt the smaller body against him stiffen. Allen's eyes were wide open, grey pupils scanning the area around him, seeing smoke and craters on the ground, and Lenalee lying unconscious next to him. A wave of guilt suddenly seized him at that sight. Then he felt something else; he felt something warm around him, a faint scent of forest, and a strong energy trying to prevent his own from wrecking havoc again.

Slowly, the aura around him faded and his stormy spiritual energy calmed down. Allen's body was shuddering against Kanda, his head was throbbing with pain; he wanted to let himself fall into a deep slumber. And that's what he did.

Feeling Allen's body relaxing in his arms, Kanda glanced at the boy's pale – and now peaceful – face to see that he had fallen asleep. The black-haired youkai let out a small sigh and carefully sat down on the ground, Allen in his lap. The boy was breathing quietly, his head resting against Kanda's chest.

"Idiot." the shikigami repeated softly.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
So, as I said at the beginning, I don't know when the next update will be. Maybe in 2 weeks, maybe in 2 months. Because I'm going on vacation in two days, then I'll move to where my new school is, which isn't near. So I don't know when I'll have a computer and Internet. But this story WON'T be put on hold or anything, I plan to update sooner or later. Unless the plane explodes, or I am kidnapped or something like that.  
Anyway, I wanna change the rating to M in a few chapters. Is it ok with you guys? It won't be anything explicit since I fail at writing explicit stuff, but suggestive enough.  
And again, THX A LOT for your support on this story. I'll do my best to keep up to your expectations :]


	9. Hatred

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

* * *

**Chapter 9 – Hatred**

A knock on the wooden panel made Komui raise his eyes from his current work.

"Come in." he said. An old man barely taller than a young child came in. He had huge, black rings under his eyes but they looked more painted than due to some lack of sleep.

"I made some investigations as you requested, Komui.

"That was quick, Bookman." the Chinese man replied with a smile.

"That is because there was not much to be found." the old man went on, slightly annoyed. "I searched through all the archives of the library, and there is no mention of a demon that calls itself 'the Earl'."

"How is that possible?" Komui asked. "There should have been at least some tales or legends, as there are for Kanda. Or maybe the Earl is not an ancient demon as we thought?"

"This is why I say the library is pretty much incomplete. At first, I asked myself the same question as you, but it is very improbable that a youkai that can be a match for the demon Kanda could be younger than a few centuries. Therefore, I searched my own archives which gather data from countries overseas, and though it is very succinct, I found a note written by a foreign monk mentioning a powerful demon travelling all over the regions to gather subordinates. The translation may not be correct, but I am pretty sure the name of this demon is 'the Earl'."

"So what you are saying is that the Earl is coming from a far away country to gather... subordinates?" Komui frowned. "What for?"

"I found no further information." Bookman replied, making Komui sigh.

"Well, thank you for your work." he merely said.

* * *

_It's all blurry._ Allen blinked a few times and tried to raise his hand to rub his eyes. _Too numb to move._ The boy made an attempt at moving several parts of his body more or less successfully. _Headache._ He winced as he slowly woke up, feeling physically drained of any vitality and strength, and mentally as empty as a bamboo stick. _Exhausted._ He was about to let himself fall back to sleep again when a sharp voice next to him made him jump:

"Che, it took you some time to wake up, Moyashi."

_Oooh, great._ The silver-haired managed to turn his head on the side, though he didn't really need to since he knew perfectly whom that voice belonged to, despite his state of dizziness. Allen was barely awake and the first person to greet him had to be _him_, of all people and youkai. Kanda was standing right next to Allen's futon, his back leaning against the wall and cross-armed. Apparently, the glare in the boy's eyes was eloquent enough as a smirk appeared on Kanda's lips:

"What is it? Already in a bad mood?" he asked, his tone full with sarcasm.

"I wonder whose fault it is that I'm in a bad mood." Allen mumbled. "And the name's Allen, Bakanda. I want to sleep. Please get out."

"Che, you already slept during three whole days. You're not a human, you're a sloth."

It took Allen ten long seconds to register Kanda's words. Then his eyes widened in surprise:

"Three days? How could I have slept three days without waking up once?" he asked.

Before Kanda could reply anything, a doctor had come in and interrupted them:

"Oh, you're finally awake? Thank gods, we were beginning to worry about you, young boy. How are you feeling?" he asked Allen.

"A bit tired, but I'm fine." the boy answered as he tried to sit up, which he managed with some difficulties.

"Don't move too much if you can't." the doctor advised. "Well, you need to feed yourself first. I'll go tell the kitchen to bring you something then come back to examine you."

As the doctor left, the room fell silent. Allen tried his best to ignore his shikigami's presence, focusing instead on his blanket which he stared at intensely, while the black-haired youkai simply stood there, not having moved a single finger. None of them talked and Allen wished for the doctor to come back quickly to lighten the very uneasy atmosphere of the room. Fortunately, it seemed that his prayers were answered, for a few minutes later, the man entered the room again with a tray in his hands. He put it on the floor, then examined Allen's body before decreeing that he was in perfect shape and leaving him alone for his meal. As the doctor was about to leave, Allen asked:

"Ah, hm, is it ok if some people come and visit me?"

"Of course, there is no problem about it." the man replied.

"Then… if you see the Exorcists Lavi and Lenalee, could you…"

"Ah, those two? Don't worry, they'll come here in the afternoon. They've been doing it for the past three days." the doctor replied with a smile.

"Thank you." Allen bowed his head.

It was only after the doctor had left that Allen remembered he didn't know how soon afternoon was. Never mind that, he'd patiently wait for Lavi and Lenalee to come and thank them for visiting him those past three days. Now the only problem was how to kill time knowing that a certain black-haired youkai was still in the same room as him. Allen quickly glanced at him; Kanda hadn't moved and was looking elsewhere, as if there was no one else but himself in the room.

Several minutes passed during which Allen ate his meal silently and in a rather awkward atmosphere. He usually didn't mind silence, but with Kanda's presence, it was something else. The boy could barely stand his shikigami standing there while he was confined to bed, not saying anything nor moving the slightest bit, exactly like a statue. Except that a statue usually didn't make you feel so intimidated. After another couple of minutes, the young Exorcist decided to make an attempt at starting a conversation, praying that it wouldn't be too risky an idea:

"Hmm Kanda, how long have you been staying here? I mean, if you are bored, you can always go somewhere else." Allen said carefully.

The said Kanda didn't answer at first, instead he looked at the boy out of the corner of his eyes, and for a moment Allen thought that it had been a bad idea to open his mouth, until his shikigami finally answered:

"I'm always bored no matter where I am, unless I get to kill some youkai or some people."

Again with killing people. Allen managed to convince himself that Kanda was simply trying to annoy him, and let it go. In any case, he was still too weak in both mind and body to start an argument. So he resumed:

"That doesn't answer my question. Since when are you here?"

"I don't see why you should care about that, Moyashi." Kanda replied dryly.

"It's Allen, Bakanda! And I was just curious to know, that's all…" Allen replied, bringing his knees to his chest and resting his chin on them. "Oh by the way, how come I'm almost uninjured and yet I slept for three days?"

"You exhausted yourself too much." was Kanda's short answer.

"I noticed that by myself, thank you very much. What I'm asking is how did I manage to do that?"

Kanda glanced at Allen then raised an eyebrow.

"Don't you remember what you did back then?" he asked.

"Uh well, I remember that demon, Tyki, trying to strangle Lenalee, then I was kind of… panicked and didn't know what to do, then…" Allen frowned, visibly trying to remember what had happened next, before opening his eyes wide as something came back to him: "… everything was destroyed around me, and Lenalee was lying on the ground! Gods, is she alright?" he started panicking.

"Idiot, both she and the other Exorcist have been coming every day to see you, so of course she is." Kanda snapped, slightly annoyed.

"Oh, true… but what about the village? I can't remember very well, but those demons destroyed everything, right? I saw…"

"They didn't. You did." Kanda cut him again.

Allen looked at his shikigami questioningly, uncertain of what he had just heard.

"Don't make fun of me. I certainly don't have enough power to…" he said hesitantly.

"You did back then." Kanda cut him once more.

"Wh-what do you mean? Even if I was powerful enough, I'd never do something such as destroying the place I am supposed to defend." Allen wanted to believe that Kanda was mocking him again, but the serious look on his shikigami's face made him doubt.

"So you really don't remember." Kanda stated. "Che, you really are a pain in the neck, no matter the circumstances."

"Then tell me what happened!" Allen started getting irritated. "Tell me how in heaven a good-for-nothing Exorcist like me could possibly have cause such destruction! And were there casualties?"

"No. As for how, it seems you managed to lift your barriers. I wasn't there when you did it, but I'm pretty sure that's what happened. The only thing I didn't expect was the amount of energy which was concealed in you; I have to admit you surprised me quite a lot."

At those words, suspicion appeared on Allen's face. Was that supposed to be a compliment? Or another way to mock him? The boy didn't have to wait for the answer as Kanda immediately added:

"But I suppose it was pure luck since I can't feel anything from you anymore. And you couldn't even control your energy properly. You're back to your usual and useless self." he said with a smirk.

"Kanda, you jerk!" Allen snapped back. "A-anyway, that's not the point! You said I lifted my barriers and such, but why can't I remember anything from it?"

"Don't ask me about something which only concerns you, Moyashi." Kanda replied, shrugging.

Allen didn't have time to add anything else as he heard a knock on the door. His face brightened; it was surely Lavi and Lenalee. However, he was quickly disappointed as he heard Komui's voice on the other side on the panel:

"Allen? Can I come in? It's Komui."

"Yes, please do." Allen replied politely.

The panel was slid open, and Allen's superior stepped in, a smile on his face.

"Good afternoon, Allen. I'm glad you're finally awake. You got us very worried, you know?" he said, kneeling down next to Allen's futon.

"I'm sorry." the boy said apologetically.

"No need for that. Anyway, I'd like to ask you some questions. Do you feel in good shape enough to answer? Kanda already told me everything he knows, so now I'd like to see if you have something else which could help us enlighten what happened."

"Ah, yes, of course. I'm fine enough."

As Komui nodded and was about to speak again, Kanda cut him abruptly:

"It will be a waste of time. The brat said he doesn't remember a thing."

Both Komui and Allen turned to him, the latter glaring at him but he couldn't really retort anything since it was true. Then Komui turned back to Allen:

"Is it true?" Then, as Allen nodded, Komui sighed heavily. "This won't make things easier. Well, at least we know that those demons are after you, and after you only. The other villages were not attacked at all for these past three days, so my hypothesis is that the first wave of attacks against the surrounding villages was only to force you to come out."

"Wh- They killed so many people simply to force me out?" Allen asked in shock. Then, lowering his eyes, he murmured: "It can't be…"

"I already told you that." Kanda intervened, not sounding the slightest bit concerned. "The Earl wants to kill you so he can kill me."

"B-but he didn't have to go that far! It's too unfair for those people…" the silver-haired boy put a hand over his mouth as to keep himself from sobbing; at the same time, pain and sadness veiled his stormy eyes.

Komui glanced at Kanda, but the latter didn't look like he was going to move from his spot or do anything for the boy, so the Chinese man gently patted Allen's shoulder.

"Allen, don't blame yourself. It's not your fault those people died, it's those demons', you understand? It's not your fault."

After a few seconds, Allen managed to nod and pulled himself together.

"If the Earl wants me only, then I'll have to go meet him in order to prevent other tragedies from happening." he eventually said.

"Idiot, that's exactly the last thing to do." Kanda replied, irritated.

"I agree with Kanda. You can't possibly do something at your level." Komui added with a softer tone.

"But I need to d…" Allen started stubbornly.

"Stupid Moyashi!" The black-haired youkai suddenly uncrossed his arms, leant down and grabbed Allen by the hair, pulling the boy's face up and making him gasp. Then, staring straight into his eyes, he added icily:

"Don't even think about it. There's no way I'll let you go to your death, even if it means I'll have to tie you up. You may have managed to get the upper hand once against the Earl's underlings, but don't you dare think it means you can take down the Earl himself."

He then released Allen who was speechless and could only look away from Kanda. Feeling that things were getting dangerous, Komui quickly intervened:

"Kanda, I'll ask you not to treat your master that way." he said with authority. "Allen simply thought of others before thinking about himself, which is more than honorable for him. However, since I am pretty sure you can't understand that way of thinking, the only thing I'll ask of you is to accept that human beings don't necessarily have the same priorities as youkai."

"Che." Kanda merely replied as he leant back against the wall.

"This put aside, there is something I'd like to talk to you about, Allen. As your shikigami said, it seems you managed to handle two of the demons which attacker you all by yourself. Also, the area around the village was partly destroyed, and well… according to Kanda…" Komui hesitated.

"I'm the one responsible for that." Allen finished.

"I talked with Kanda about that, and it seems that you managed to lift your barriers for a moment. I also asked Professor Tiedoll about those barriers, and he thinks that they are parts of you and can't be suppressed easily; however, it should be possible for you to practise controlling them so you could use all your energy whenever necessary." Komui paused, then glanced at Kanda before going on: "And… your shikigami told me that he's found a quick way to make you control your barriers efficiently."

"Really? What is that way?" Allen asked his shikigami.

"You'll see by yourself." Kanda replied with his usual nice tone. "I'll take my leave now." he added abruptly, then headed for the door and left the room before Allen or Komui could add anything.

"That idiot…" Allen muttered.

"You can't really blame him, he's been staying by your side since you were brought here." Komui said with a smile, then chuckled as he saw the look of disbelief on the boy's face. "I assure you he did. Well, he may not be the nicest shikigami I've ever met, but at least you can count on him to take great care of you."

At those words, a slight blush appeared on Allen's cheeks, which he quickly hid by looking away and mumbling that Kanda was still an idiot anyway.

"Anyway, I need you to understand that it is vital for us all that you can control your spiritual energy properly. I am not accusing of anything, but next time you go into that state again, you may do much more damage than this time. Allen, it seems that you possess a great potential hidden within you, to the point that you managed to make Lenalee faint back then – no, don't worry about that, everything is fine now." Komui hurriedly added as he saw Allen's guilty face. "However, I'd like you to do your best to use this potential as fitted for an Exorcist, meaning that you should avoid destroying the whole area and render the other Exorcists ineffective." Komui said with a smile, though the small attempt at humour didn't work much on Allen. "Well, I won't bother you more, Allen. You need some rest. Hurry up and get well soon." Komui went on as he stood up and prepared to leave.

"Thank you."

Komui left the room, leaving the boy alone and deep in thought. His main concern was how to control his energy, and now that he could calmly think about it, he was beginning to dread Kanda training him once more. The ten first days of training had undeniably helped him a lot, but it had been particularly hard on him and the main goal hadn't been reached. _'But Kanda said he found a way to train me efficiently. I wonder what could it be… At the same time, I don't think I want to find it out right now.'_ he thought, shaking his head.

The rest of the afternoon passed pretty quickly as Lavi and Lenalee came to visit him; Lavi's natural good mood helped Allen lighten his own mind and he managed to enjoy himself for a short time in his two friends' company.

Another good news was that the doctor allowed him to leave the hospital room at the end of the afternoon, stating that his condition was absolutely normal. Allen was grateful and didn't waste a second to leave the room and get some fresh air in the garden of the Temple.

A layer of snow was still covering the ground, the temperature was rather low and the sky was getting dark, therefore there was no one else but the silver-haired boy, to his greatest satisfaction. He shivered a bit due to the cold, but he didn't feel like going back to his room to take his cloak, so he decided to simply walk around the garden and empty his mind as he did so. For half an hour he simply wandered on the alleys, ignoring the cold wind on his face, happy enough with being able to move after being stuck to bed for three days.

The sky was almost dark now, and the air was getting colder. Allen shivered violently as he put both his arms around him.

"I should go back." he spoke to no one in particular.

"Or you could dress more warmly, idiot Moyashi." a voice replied right behind the boy. Before Allen could turn round, he felt a wooden cloak being thrown over his shoulder. Then he turned his head on the side, to see his shikigami next to him, gazing somewhere else.

"Hm, th-thanks Kanda." Allen said, praying that the lack of light would hide the embarrassment showing on his cheeks. "Well I suppose I'll walk a bit more, then. A-are you accompanying me?" the boy asked hesitantly, and for some unknown reason, he wished that the youkai would accept.

"Che, it's not like I can leave a brat who can't take care of himself alone." Kanda replied with his usual tone.

"I can take care of myself, Bakanda!"

"Whatever."

No further words were exchanged as they walked in the silent garden for several minutes. Allen wasn't shivering anymore, it was like Kanda's presence warmed the atmosphere up. _'No, no way. There's no way anything warm could come out of him.'_ The boy convinced himself that it was the cloak that kept him warm. Yes, exactly. The cloak.

Still, he couldn't help but feel something different now that Kanda was there. Something he was pretty sure had nothing to do with his clothing. And it wasn't the first time he felt it. Allen searched his memory to remember where and when he had already experienced it. He was certain it was not so long ago, maybe… and then he remembered.

"Kanda" he called. "Earlier you said that you managed to calm me down when my energy went out of control. How did you do that?"

The long-haired shikigami didn't reply at first, and as Allen was about to insist, he spoke:

"I used my own energy to control yours."

"Yes, but how?"

"You're getting annoying, Moyashi."

"It's Allen. And I want to know the details."

"None of your business."

Allen stopped walking and turned to Kanda, now slightly irritated:

"Stop saying it's none of my business when it absolutely is. Now tell me what I want to know." he ordered, and to his surprise, Kanda didn't snap back. Instead he sighed and asked:

"Why do you want to know so much?"

"Well obviously because it concerns me!" Allen replied, clearly annoyed. Then on a softer tone, he went on: "I've been feeling something… strange since the moment you were here, and I think I also felt it during our last mission. I don't know, I think it must have been right before I passed out, but I felt something… soothing enveloping mine… like a warm aura…"

The boy stopped, knowing that Kanda would find his blabbering particularly stupid; why couldn't he have shut his mouth? He had just given his shikigami another reason to mock him, as if their constant bickering weren't enough already. However, to his greatest surprise, Kanda's answer wasn't the one Allen had expected:

"That was my energy you felt."

"Huh?" the boy looked at his shikigami with clear disbelief on his face. Kanda's energy? How could Kanda's energy be so warm and reassuring and calming and…?

"What's with that face, Moyashi?" Kanda asked, smirking.

"N-nothing! And the name's Allen, Bakanda!" Allen snapped back. "S-so, that really was your energy? Why can I feel it now? Usually I can't sense a thing coming out from you, did you stop suppressing it?"

"I didn't." the long-haired youkai merely replied as he resumed walking.

Allen followed him, waiting for Kanda to add something more, but seeing that his shikigami didn't have any intention of doing so, he stepped right in front of him, preventing him from going any farther. Kanda looked at the boy with annoyance; the sky was dark now, but he could clearly see the boy's face under the moonlight, and he could read the stubbornness in those grey eyes staring straight at him. The youkai let out a long sigh before speaking again:

"What I didn't tell your superior is that you didn't only lost control of your powers, but also of your own mind. At that moment, you didn't listen to anything else but your urge to kill. You heard me well. I read your eyes back then, and I can say it wasn't difficult for me to recognize the look of a demon yearning for blood."

"You're lying!" Allen exclaimed. "You're…"

"Feel free not to believe me." Kanda cut him sharply. "The fact is, I was forced to use my energy to compel yours to retreat back in you. Now the result is that you have traces of my energy mixed with yours, that's why you are able to sense me even when I don't release my powers."

"But I didn't feel anything when you were with me at the hospital room." the silver-haired boy retorted, barely half-convinced by Kanda's words.

"Because you were still too weak. You didn't even feel my presence in the garden until you saw me."

Allen kept silent for a few seconds, before murmuring to himself:

"So now I have some of your energy mixed with mine? A demon's energy?"

Then he gasped as Kanda lifted his chin with one hand and smirked.

"Feeling disgusted? Or horrified that your once pure energy is now tainted with mine?" he asked the boy, who started blushing under Kanda's gaze. Then, moving his face closer to Allen's, he added: "Let me tell you something: you like it. You like having me around you. You like the feeling of having a part of me in you."

"N-no! Certainly not!" Allen replied fiercely as he slapped Kanda's hand away and stepped back. "Are you so blind you can't see that I absolutely hate you! You and all your kind, I hate all of you! I…"

"Don't try to fool me. I have lived among humans for long enough to understand each of your reactions. And I can say that you don't hate me as much as you'd like to believe it. Anyway, it's normal for a brat like you with so little energy to feel attracted by power." And on a more casual tone, he added: "You should have dinner and go sleep now. Rest is something you humans need to an extent that amazes me."

That said, the black-haired youkai started walking back but stopped after a few steps. Without turning round, he said:

"One more thing. It doesn't matter if you manage to learn how to control your barriers if your mind is messed up like this, because your energy will be messed up as well. Stop lying to yourself, and you may improve."

His dark silhouette disappeared in the night, leaving a stunned Allen standing in the middle of the garden, multiple – and contradictory – thoughts conflicting in his head.

"I hate you. That's the one and only truth." he murmured.

* * *

"My dear children, you are aware that I am not particularly satisfied with the outcome of your little adventure."

The man who was talking was partially hidden in the shadows, however, his eyes ablaze with suppressed anger could clearly be seen in the half-obscurity of the place.

"Nevertheless, what you told me about that young Exorcist intrigues me to no end, and I wish I'll be able to meet him soon enough. Anyway, how are the preparations doing?"

"Everything is going as planned, Earl." a girl replied, grinning. She visibly wasn't afraid of the Earl, and actually, neither were the other demon which was with her, namely Tyki. "However, I fear that Jasdevi won't be able to do much for a few days more, so I suggest that Lulu takes his place."

"Very well." The Earl sounded happy now. "We should let Jasdevi rest as much as necessary, but that poor boy is so reckless sometimes…" he added with a sigh. "Anyway, you may go now. And inform Lulubell that she will be replacing Jasdevi." he said, gesturing Road and Tyki to leave.

As he was left alone, an eerie smile appeared on his face hidden in the shadow.

"This land belongs to us youkai. And it will soon return to us. Humans are weaklings who can't understand that. But they will soon understand it."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Yes, I'm back. And it took me quite some time for this chapter so I hope it won't disappoint you. Since I'm not drowning under the weight of my homework (yet), I plan to update another chapter soon. That is, if you're still with me guys :]


	10. Bonds

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

A/N: A pretty long chapter. And rating will go up next chapter. Yeah.

* * *

**Chapter 10 - Bonds  
**

For the hundredth time, a silver-haired boy tossed and turned on his futon, unable to get some sleep. First, because the words of a certain long-haired youkai kept playing in his head; and second, because the said youkai was sharing the same room as him. Of course, they had been sharing the same room since their first meeting; however, tonight was the first night the young Exorcist Allen Walker felt terribly uneasy by Kanda's presence next to him. He glanced at him; in the dark, Allen could barely see the silhouette of the youkai sitting against the wall – as usual – and assume that he was sleeping.

_You like it._

Allen bit his lip as he pulled his blanket over his head. No, he didn't like it.

_You like having me around you._

Allen shut his eyes tight, trying to shake any thought of his shikigami off his mind. Lies, lies, lies. All the words coming from that demon's mouth were nothing but lies. How could Allen possibly enjoy having such a despicable creature by his side when the mere thought of it made him nauseous?

_You like the feeling of having a part of me in you._

It was useless. No matter how hard he tried, there was no way to get rid of that faint yet warm and continuous sensation enveloping him. Since his last request, traces of Kanda's energy had been mixed with the boy's own and was now flowing within him permanently. Therefore, Allen could feel Kanda's presence anytime, even when the youkai suppressed his powers, and saying that it didn't rejoice the boy was an understatement.

The sensation in itself wasn't unpleasant actually, it was more the thought of sharing something that came from a _demon_ which was disturbing. It seemed that everything was going worse and worse for Allen. He who couldn't stand having anything to do with youkai had been forced to become an Exorcist, to bind with a demon which had massacred countless persons, and now he even had some of that demon's energy infused in him. The mere thought of it made the boy shiver under his blanket. He felt stained.

An idea suddenly crossed his mind. Or rather, an impulse. The urge to cut himself and let himself bleed until the feeling of having something demonic in him disappeared. Allen dismissed the idea as quickly as it formed in his head. No, he wasn't stupid enough to perform such a pointless act, and it wasn't like spiritual energy ran through one's veins anyway. His being was impregnated with Kanda's energy, and it was irreversible.

The silver-haired boy yawned silently. It was useless messing his mind any further; he'd better try to get some sleep otherwise chances that he would survive Kanda's training on the next day would be more than low.

* * *

Allen stirred on his futon and slowly opened his eyes. It had been long since the last time he could take his time to stretch himself, then stay under his blanket a few more minutes to relish the warmth of his cocoon, listening to some birds tweeting and…

Something was wrong. He wasn't supposed to be lazing like that. Kanda. The youkai hadn't woken him up like he usually did for training. Allen sat up and his eyes landed on his shikigami, who was sitting at his usual spot. Kanda turned his eyes to the boy and rose an eyebrow as he saw Allen's surprised look:

"What's with that face, Moyashi?" he asked casually.

"W-well, aren't we supposed to go train today?"

"Are you in such a hurry to suffer?" Kanda went on, smirking.

"Of course I'm not. I was simply wondering why you didn't drag me into the forest this morning."

"Obviously because there's nothing to do in the forest."

"So I won't be hunting youkai down?"

"I wonder…" Kanda merely replied.

"What kind of answer is that?" Allen snapped, annoyed.

"I'm not your tutor or anything like that. Don't think that I'll spend your whole life making your schedules for you, brat." the black-haired youkai replied as he got up and walked to the door.

"I never said that, Bakanda!" Allen retorted as his shikigami left the room and shut the panel behind him. The boy mumbled: "Gods, I hate him."

The first half of the day passed smoothly, given that Kanda was nowhere to be seen, though Allen knew he was somewhere in the Temple, for he could feel his presence. He sighed.

"I'll never be able to get used to it." he talked to himself.

"Used to what?" a voice from behind him made him jump. "Oh sorry Allen-kun! I didn't mean to scare you."

The silver-haired boy turned round, and a smile brightened his face as he greeted his Chinese friend:

"It's ok Lenalee. Where were you going?"

"Nowhere really. Lavi left on a request a few minutes ago so I thought I'd look for you so we could have a walk together. Unless you have something else to do." the girl replied with a charming smile.

"I don't. Where do you want to go?"

"How about the inner yard? It's less cold than the garden." she suggested. Then, as Allen nodded, she went on: "So, what will you never be able to get used to?"

Allen glanced at her, then answered, smiling: "Oh, nothing important. Don't worry."

"Well, if you say so. Anyway, Kanda isn't with you today?"

"No. And I won't complain."

Lenalee let out a short laugh. "I understand you."

'_No, I'm afraid you don't.'_ Allen thought, but kept quiet. Both of them kept walking to the inner yard, where they sat on a stone bench. The yard was actually a patio with a small pond in the middle and numerous trees and plants around. Right now, everything was still covered in snow as winter was at its peak. A few students were there also, and that was the main reason why Allen never went to that place. The garden was much larger, making it hard for two people to cross path, while in this small courtyard, he could feel the several glances directed to him. Allen's appearance was always considered a bad omen among the students who kept saying he had something demonic in him. _'At least they are right now.'_ Allen thought bitterly.

"Allen?" Lenalee tilted her head and looked at the boy questioningly.

"Wh-oh, sorry Lenalee, I spaced out." Allen apologized, forcing a smile.

The two Exorcists spent about a quarter of an hour talking before Lenalee chose to go back to her room, leaving an Allen who had nothing to do. As he was about to go back to his own room, he suddenly remembered that he hadn't seen Kanda for the whole morning and started worrying about that abnormality. Where was he? Allen could feel his presence, but was unable to tell accurately his location.

Then an idea came to him. If he concentrated enough, he could probably locate Kanda with his energy sensing. Allen closed his eyes and focused on the characteristics of Kanda's energy to find him: strong, powerful, overwhelming. He scanned the area around him for a minute before feeling something resonate in him, as if the little energy he possessed from Kanda was calling for its original owner; then an unexpected shock hit Allen's mind like an invisible wave, startling him.

The shock hadn't been violent or aggressive; on the contrary, a warm feeling had seized Allen the moment he received the shock. It took the boy a mere second to recognize Kanda's imprint in it, and he understood. Kanda's spiritual energy had responded to his call, and the young Exorcist now knew exactly where his shikigami was. That kind of energy sensing was new to him; usually, he simply let his energy search for any kind of youkai's energy, found it and that was it.

However, this time was different; it was exactly as if Allen had called his target, and the said target had answered the call. There had been a mutual exchange which didn't exist in the usual practice of energy sensing, and the only explanation Allen had was the fact that he and Kanda were bonded in a more closer way than the other Exorcists with their shikigami. The thought made Allen shiver though he couldn't decide if it was out of repulsion or out of… excitement.

_You like the feeling of having a part of me in you._

The silver-haired boy shook his head. He couldn't deny his strong attraction – no, fascination for Kanda, but he blamed it all on the demon's unbelievably huge amount of power. Still, even when Kanda suppressed his energy, something kept stirring inside Allen even if he continuously ignored it. However, since the 'accident' that occurred during his last request, the feeling had been progressively growing into a very disturbing sensation. He was torn apart between the disgust he bore for being contaminated by a demon and the unexplainable desire to merge even more into that powerful and protective energy… Wait. No, no, no. There was definitely nothing protective about Kanda.

Allen held his head between his hands and shook it once more, grumbling:

"He's going to make me insane."

"Who is?" asked a voice with a very familiar scornful tone.

Too absorbed by his thoughts, the boy hadn't noticed the presence of his shikigami right next to him and jumped slightly.

"K-Kanda! When did you get here?"

"Che, a second ago." Then, as if he was annoyed to ask Allen something, the youkai went on grumpily: "What happened just now?"

"What do you mean?" the young Exorcist asked, which irritated Kanda even more.

"What was that… thing you did?"

"That thing?" Allen asked again, truly perplexed. Then, realization came to him: "Oh! Ah well… I was trying to look for you with my energy sensing, and I think I did something which made your energy respond to mine, or rather to the traces of yours mixed with mine… Though I don't know if such a thing is even possible… What do you think?" he asked, raising his eyes to Kanda.

The long-haired youkai remained silent for a few seconds before talking again:

"Did you manage to find me?" he asked. Allen nodded.

"Yes, you were in the garden, weren't you?"

Again, Kanda didn't answer immediately. He looked deep in thought and Allen didn't dare disturb him. After what seemed to be an eternity, he finally spoke again:

"You called me. I don't know how, but you called me and I answered. The moment I sensed your call, I was able to tell precisely where you were, which should have been impossible with normal energy sensing. Now I must say it's the first time this ever happened to me. You're a troublesome one, Moyashi. I never imagined that leaving some of my energy in you would lead to this." There was no hint of sarcasm in his tone, which encouraged Allen to ask again:

"Does it mean that I'm able to call you wherever you are from now on?"

"Probably." Kanda glanced at Allen and seeing the boy's face, he added with a smirk: "See? I told you you liked it."

It took Allen a second to understand what his shikigami was talking about, before retorting vehemently:

"N-no I don't! Stop saying such things! I was simply thinking that it would be more convenient, that's all! Shikigami need to stay close to their masters so they can hear their call, but now you won't have to follow me everywhere, so it'll be far better!"

"And I told you I have lived for long enough among humans to know what your reactions mean."

"And I keep repeating that you are completely wrong! You don't know anything about me, so stop acting as if you understand me!"

"Oh, but I do." Kanda replied as composedly as Allen was agitated. "Your violent response, your blushing, your heartbeat raising. It's what you humans call 'denial' and what I, as a demon, call a stupidity."

Allen was taken off guard by those words, and lowered his tone:

"Don't talk as if you know how human beings think. You're a demon, so there's no way you can understand how humans feel. Now I'll demand that you stop making wrong assumptions like that, it's pointless."

It didn't go unnoticed by Kanda that the boy had avoided his gaze as he talked, which made the demon smirk.

"Whatever." he answered. "But remember that I told you there's no way you're going to improve with a messed up mind like yours."

"A-anyway, about the training" Allen quickly took the opportunity to change the topic. "You said you'd help me control my barriers. How?"

"What exactly do you remember of the other night?" Kanda asked instead of answering. Allen frowned, unsure whether the question had anything to do with his.

"Simply that Lenalee was going to be strangled by the demon. And I couldn't do anything." the boy added, a hint of bitterness in his tone.

"I don't mean that." Kanda said, annoyed. "What do you remember about your own state?"

"My... own state? What do you mean?"

"Che. Lifting your barriers require a mechanism that only you can understand because you erected them. Unless you manage to remember exactly how you felt before your loss of memory, training you is going to be a pain. You need to recall the precise moment when you suppressed your barriers; you necessarily must have felt something different in you at that moment, though I can't tell you what since you're the only one who can materialize the barriers in your mind. Now think well."

For a second, Allen was clearly surprised by Kanda's words. He hadn't expected him to actually give him such a detailed speech, but after all, Kanda was a very ancient demon and as such, he was probably knowledgeable when it came to those matters.. Therefore the boy concentrated, trying to remember how he had managed to lift his barriers. Back then, he had felt panicked, then desperate because of his own helplessness. Then the will to save Lenalee had taken over, and... nothing. Allen shook his head, powerless.

"I can't remember." he said apologetically.

"I didn't expect you to." Kanda sneered. Allen glared at his shikigami; of course he kept looking down on him. Exasperated, the boy asked:

"Can't you be more precise on what you expect from me then?"

"I already told you. One way or another, you must have gotten aware of your barriers in order to lift them. I want you to remember exactly how you represented them in your mind." Kanda repeated, strangely patient.

Again, the silver-haired boy frowned. Representation? Well, he didn't have any memory of representing anything in his head, given how he was too focused on saving Lenalee. Visibly, the look on his face was enough for Kanda to understand that Allen had absolutely no clue about what he was talking about. He let out a sigh of annoyance.

"Never mind. It's not like I had very high hopes about you anyway."

Though he forced himself to look indifferent, those words hurt Allen more than what he could have admitted and he retorted, offended:

"Well, you said that you found a way to train me so I'm waiting for you to do it so I can improve!"

"Don't put the blame on me, Moyashi." Kanda declared sharply. "Your inability to fight like a real Exorcist comes from you, and from you only. First you need to find out by yourself how you represent your damn barriers, then you have to get rid of that silly behaviour of yours."

"What are you talking about?" the boy asked dryly before gulping as Kanda plunged his dark blue eyes into silver ones.

"I'm talking about your inner conflicts that renders the control of your energy as uncertain as that of a beginner. I'm talking about your refusing that you're drawn to me." Kanda replied casually, which pretty much irritated the boy who snapped:

"Well, if you started training me so I could get stronger, I may not feel so eager to feel your own power any more!" he said before gasping and covering his mouth with his hand.

The long-haired youkai raised an eyebrow, and his smirk grew wider as he leaned towards Allen, removed the boy's hand and grabbed his chin.

"So the moyashi finally admits that he does feel attracted by my superior being?" he asked, slowly running a thumb over Allen's trembling lip.

The silver-haired boy gulped silently, unable to speak nor move as he felt a new wave of energy engulfing him, obviously sent by Kanda on purpose. Unconsciously, Allen shivered despite the warmth that ran through his entire body. He cursed silently; his shikigami was quick at learning how to use the newly created link between them.

"Dare tell me you don't like it when I do this." the youkai almost whispered as he sent another wave, earning him a gasp from the boy.

"I-I don…" Allen started hesitantly, but was stopped by those two dark pools gazing straight at him as if they were able to read through him.

"Che, you're hopeless." Kanda replied, suddenly releasing him and turning away from him.

The boy, still immobile, almost jumped when he heard a voice calling from behind him:

"Exorcist Allen Walker! Your superior Komui Lee requests that you come to his work room as soon as possible." a young boy – whom Allen recognized as being one of the messengers of the Temple – ran to him, out of breath. Oh, so Kanda had noticed the messenger coming and that was the reason he had released Allen.

"Very well." the silver-haired boy answered. "I shall go now then."

The young messenger bowed quickly and left. Allen let out a small sigh, before heading for Komui's workroom. A few steps later, he stopped, annoyed:

"You don't have to follow me everywhere." he said dryly.

"Che, if your superior is calling for you, it can only mean it's a request. Therefore I need to hear the details." his shikigami who had been silently following him replied.

"Fine, but don't do that _thing_ again. Unless necessary." Allen ordered, which made Kanda smirk.

They arrived at Komui's place and were invited in by the Chinese man who motioned both of them to sit down. As usual, Kanda merely stood right behind Allen. The boy noticed the presence of a large fox-like youkai sitting next to Komui, and immediately identified it as one of Lavi's shikigami.

"We can't afford to waste time so I'll get straight to the point." Komui started gloomily. "I sent Lavi on a request this morning, and about fifteen minutes ago one of his shikigami came back to me, asking me to send reinforcement to his master. Allen, I'm sending you out because I believe you will be able to manage somehow."

"Why do you think so?" the silver-haired boy asked, surprised. Komui gave a faint smile.

"You showed that you possess great abilities in your last request, and I am fairly sure that Kanda will be of great help in this case as well."

The thought of his previous request made the boy stiffen, but there was a more important matter right now; Lavi was in danger and needed help.

"Please tell me the details." Allen asked, with a determination unknown to him. Behind him, Kanda didn't repress a faint smirk of satisfaction.

* * *

A woman-like youkai was kneeling in front of a figure partly hidden by the shadows.

"I shall be leaving then, Earl." the youkai said placidly.

"Do not fail, my dear Lulubell. But I'm not too worried about you since you are not like this poor and reckless Jasdevi. You may go." the Earl dismissed her.

The youkai nodded, then suddenly turned into a black cat before leaving silently. An eerie grin appeared on the Earl's face. Lulubell's ability to transform into any living being was something very convenient.

"This year's Festival of the Emperor will be particularly interesting to watch." he spoke to himself.

* * *

Allen was gripping tightly at the russet fur of the big fox-like youkai on which he was riding, ignoring the icy wind whipping his face as the youkai was running at full speed. Next to him, Kanda was moving as quickly as Lavi's shikigami, which kept surprising Allen. Well, it's not like he could have imagined Kanda riding on a youkai anyway.

They were heading for the river at the edge of the forest, where Lavi had been sent to purify the area, for some youkai seemed to appear from the water's surface and scared the people coming near it. According to Lavi's shikigami, the purification was going on well, until a dozen strange youkai surfaced and started reacting violently against the purification; and despite Lavi's experience, he had had trouble dealing with them. That's why he had sent one of his shikigami back to the Temple to report to Komui.

As they got closer to the spot, Allen used his energy sensing to detect the presence of the youkai; it wasn't that simple because of the many other youkai living in the same area, however, in the middle of all those energies, he felt a stronger – no, three stronger ones. Abnormally stronger. Among them, he managed to identify two other ones: Lavi and possibly his shikigami. The Exorcist had probably managed to get rid of some of the attacking youkai.

"Lavi's here!" Allen exclaimed. "Please hurry up, Nishiko!" he urged Lavi's shikigami.

The youkai sped up, obviously as eager as the boy to save his master while Kanda looked absolutely bored. All three of them came in sight of the wide river; Allen gasped and quickly jumped off Lavi's shikigami as he saw the scene in front of him.

On the riverbank, the red-haired Exorcist and his other shikigami – which looked like a little boy but with the ears and the tail of a white fox – were facing three water demons. The first one was half-submerged in the river, its upper part was that of a huge eel while underneath, several tentacles kept splashing the water around it. The two others, though being water demons, were biped and their bodies were covered by green and dark blue scales, and were charging at Lavi and his shikigami, trying to slash them with the claws of their palmate hands or hitting them with their long and large tails while screeching loudly.

"Lavi!" Allen called as he ran to him and pulled a seal out from his sleeve.

"Al-" the older Exorcist started as he glanced towards Allen's direction, but that second of inattention was everything one of the demons needed to send him flying into the river. A tentacle then grabbed him tightly by the waist, making Lavi gasp for air and struggle to free himself.

"Gods, Lavi!" Allen called again. He knew simply by feeling the demons level of energies that they were serious opponents. "Kanda, Nishiko, take care of the two here! I'm going to help Lavi!" he ordered then quickly turned to the demon which was in the water.

He had seen that kind of demons only in his books, and knew that its tentacles had the ability to drain its preys from their spiritual energy to feed on it, meaning that Allen had to act quickly before Lavi was emptied from his energy. The red-haired Exorcist was wincing in pain and was visibly lacking air, which added to Allen's panic. The boy threw a seal at the youkai, unfortunately the only effect it had was to make the demon notice his presence. With a loud growl, it held one of its tentacles out to Allen who dodged it and threw another seal at it, again with no damage.

'_Damn it! I need more energy!'_ he thought. Then he glanced at Lavi who was still struggling though his energy was being slowly absorbed by the water demon. _'I have to hurry or Lavi will…'_ Allen knew perfectly that he had to lift his barriers once again to defeat the demon, however, the memory – or lack of – of what had happened when he had managed to release his energy during his previous request scared him. _'But this isn't the time for this! Lavi's going to die if I don't do anything!'_

He glanced behind him to see Kanda and Lavi's shikigami still busy with the other demons. _'Damn! Why isn't Kanda done with them yet?'_ Allen didn't have time to think any further as he felt something wrapping him around the waist and pulling him violently towards the river. Less than one second later, he was plunged into the more than cold water and the shock due to the difference in temperature almost made him faint. Then he was brought out of the water again, and was now hanging in the air, tightly held by the demon's tentacle, soaking wet and getting spasms from cold.

"Kan… da…" he tried to call weakly, his vision slowly blurring. Cold. It was too cold. At the same time, Allen felt his energy being drained by the youkai. "Kan…"

No. He had to stop relying on his shikigami. Right now, Lavi was gradually drifting towards death, and the younger Exorcist couldn't do anything. Again. It was like déjà vu. Lenalee. On the verge of dying.

_Lift your barriers._

But he didn't know how!

_Materialize them in your mind._

He still had enough strength to focus on his inner shields, despite the biting cold and the lack of air. This time, he'd managed without fail. He had to. He concentrated, trying to represent the barriers within him; they were part of him so there had to be a way to imagine them, for heaven's sake! Allen endeavoured to breathe as calmly as the situation allowed him to, to feel exactly how his energy was flowing in him and find where it was blocked.

And then he saw them. Or rather, he became aware of them being clearly erected in his very being, like an impermeable wall enclosing an energy that was threatening to make the wall explode if it wasn't released soon. As he concentrated even more, he felt that the barriers were wavering under the pressure of his own energy, that they only needed a little extra something to be lifted, and Allen suddenly understood the mechanism Kanda had told him about.

His energy burst out exactly like the first time, making the demon shake violently under the shock and loosing his constriction. Both Allen and Lavi were sent flying in the air, and Allen shut his eyes tight, awaiting the unavoidable collision with the ground. That didn't happen. He felt a pair of arms catching him in mid-air and heard the sound of somebody supply landing on the snow-covered ground. His first thought was 'Kanda', and as he opened his eyes, he met with the familiar piercing gaze of his shikigami who was still holding him.

"Th-thanks…" Allen started, but Kanda interrupted him:

"Your job isn't done yet, Moyashi. Go finish off that youkai first."

Allen nodded before turning to his target, then he formed a seal with his hands and uttered an incantation. The eel-demon let out a loud cry of anger before vanishing to nothing. Allen sighed of relief before turning round to see Kanda being about to slash the remaining demon – the other one having visibly been killed by Lavi's shikigami. The demon was severely injured and cursed before being cut in two by Kanda's Mugen:

"Damn you Kanda! You said we could eat the Exorcists!"

Nishiko walked near the two parts of the demon that had fallen on the ground, opened its mouth wide and sent a fireball straight at the demon's remains, turning them to ash in no time. Then the shikigami walked to his master who was sitting on the ground, shivering, and wrapped itself around him to warm him up.

"Thanks, Nishiko. Your fur is as warm as always." he said, patting the fox's head. Then he turned to Allen with a wide grin:

"Gods, Allen! You were terrific back then! And damn, what's with that energy of yours? I've never felt anything like that from you before! I can understand why Lenalee passed out when you released it, I almost did the same! Seriously, how come you've been hiding it all this time? I really thought you had no more energy than a plant – no offense though! Hey, can you suppress it a bit? It's really something you know. Allen? Hey, what's wrong?"

Lavi stared at the silver-haired boy who was standing still, head down, hair partly hiding his face. His spiritual energy was progressively subsiding; still not moving, he asked with a low tone:

"What did it mean by 'You said we could eat the Exorcists'?" Allen slowly raised his head and stared at his shikigami who was looking at him with indifference. "Kanda, answer me! What did that demon mean?" His voice was shaking with repressed anger. However, to his surprise, it wasn't Kanda who answered but Lavi:

"Hey, Allen. Please calm down, I'll explain." he paused, took a deep breath in and went on: "Basically, everything was planned from the beginning between your shikigami, Komui and me. It's Kanda who called the youkai here, and I was sent to get rid of them. The plan was that the demons would be too powerful for me to handle them alone, so Komui would have to send you out too to destroy them. That's all."

The redhead had tried to use a cheerful tone yet he noticed that Allen didn't look satisfied at all.

"What do you mean 'that's all'? Lavi, you could have been killed, for heaven's sake!" the boy said, exasperated. "And what did you come up with such an insane plan for? Kanda, you wanted Lavi to be killed or something? Damn it! What's the problem with you? And…"

"Shut up, Moyashi. You're annoying." Kanda cut him sharply. "You've been complaining all day that you didn't train, and now that you are done training, you still complain. Just shut up."

Allen opened his eyes wide.

"Tr-training? You dare call this a training?" he asked, not able to control his fury anymore.

"Indeed." Kanda merely replied.

"Allen." Lavi intervened calmly. "Let me explain. Komui didn't tell me every detail, but he told me that I could help you get stronger if I accepted this request. It seems that you get stronger anytime one of your friends is in danger. So I agreed, and I must say I'm proud of you Allen, I didn't imagine that you could get _that_ strong!" he finished happily.

"It can't be… Kanda, you told me that I had to face danger myself to lift my barriers!" Allen addressed his shikigami.

"That's how it usually works for normal people." Kanda replied, shrugging. "The problem is that I realized that you're not normal. You're an idiot. You don't care about your own life, you don't care if you get killed yet you go completely berserk as soon as someone close to you is in danger."

"Wh-what do you mean…" Allen's voice was now unsure. "You called high level demons here and made Lavi face death simply because…"

"Allen, don't worry." Lavi interrupted him. "I agreed to this, and so did Komui. And it worked. Now you can release a huge amount of spiritual energy, without destroying everything around you, isn't it great?"

The silver-haired boy lowered his head again. This was absolutely insane. His friend could have died if he had failed releasing his energy, what kind of training was that? Still, now he thought about it, Kanda wasn't wrong. From the beginning, he had never really valued his own life, thinking that it would be ok if he died since he didn't really have anything to lose. But seeing someone else on the verge of dying and not being able to save that person… the thought was unbearable. Did Kanda realize it even before he himself did? How could a _demon_ understand how a _human_ mind functioned?

"I… I guess you're right…" Allen managed to articulate, though he didn't really believed his own words.

A second later, violent shivers ran through him, making him lose his balance. For the past few minutes, his anger had made him forgotten that he was still soaking wet and that the temperature wasn't particularly high. He fell on his knees, putting both his arms around him and gritting his teeth.

"Allen!" he heard Lavi calling him. Seeing that Kanda wasn't making any particular move, Lavi exclaimed:

"Won't you go help him? He's freezing to death!"

"It's his own fault for falling into the river." Kanda replied dryly. "If you want to help him, ask your own shikigami to warm him up." He then started walking back to the Temple under Lavi's astounded eyes.

"But you're letting your own master die!" he shouted at Kanda, but the latter had already disappeared into the forest. The red-haired Exorcist swore before ordering Nishiko to take care of Allen.

Meanwhile, as he was walking, Kanda let out a sigh. If the brat died of cold, he would finally be free since it wasn't as if a demon had killed his master. Well, not like the stupid moyashi was going to die from that.

Stupid brat. Silly Exorcist. Foolish master. Kanda frowned. Since when did he consider this brat to be his master? He had to admit that the boy intrigued him more than any of the previous Exorcists he had served. He had never called any of them 'master' nor thought of them as such; however, the boy was an abnormality among the Exorcists. Who in their right mind would put others' lives before their own? No matter how much time he spent among those humans, that was something he could never grasp. To him, it was natural that his survival came first, and the rest could die for all that he cared. Oh, of course, during his long life he had met people like this stupid moyashi, mainly when he used to 'visit' a village and destroy everything in it; there were always some people who would try to save those dear to them by facing him, even if they knew they had no chance to survive.

Those dear to them. That was another notion Kanda didn't understand. Humans created bonds, then died because of those bonds. Silly creatures. Without bonds, they would be free to live; exactly like Kanda centuries ago. But Kanda was a demon.

Without bonds, the Earl would be dead now.

Kanda cursed silently as memories from when he was under the previous Exorcist's service flowed back to him. Who knows if the stupid brat wasn't going to repeat the same mistake as his ancestor? No, that wasn't going to happen. By any means, the Earl would be defeated. Matter of pride. And Kanda's pride was only second to his power.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Damn. I had a hard time with this chapter because I had two different endings, this one and a 'softer' one. In the end, this one won the battle. Hope you're fine with this chapter anyway. And as I said at the beginning, the rating will raise next chapter. Finally. Thanks for your patience (and your reviews? :D)


	11. The Demon in You, the Human in Me

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

A/N: Ahem. So here we go. I'd like to thank people who helped me improve this chapter (that is far from perfect), particularly Hanistar7 and Shinigami's voice. And I want to add something: feel free to tell me whatever you believe sux in this story since it's the only way for me to improve. As long as they are contructive criticism and not flames, I'll welcome them.

* * *

**Chapter 11 - The demon in you, the human in me  
**

A weakling. _Yet your thoughts are focused on him permanently_. A useless Exorcist. _Yet you want to make him stronger._ Because he's useless! _You never bothered about useless people... or youkai._

Kanda bit his lip out of frustration. That inner fight between him and himself was going nowhere. Yes, he had never bothered about those who weren't able to stand on par with him, meaning that he had never bothered about anyone. No one could be on par with him. _Lies, lies. You're a liar._ The youkai clenched his fist and hit the tree next to him, scaring a few birds which quickly flew away. He was walking in the forest where almost no light could pierce through the thick foliage of the high firs, where almost no human dared come for fear of the unknown youkai that lived there. Not even a single snowflake had managed to fall between the branches, leaving the ground bare of any trace of whiteness.

Kanda's ebony hair and black kimono helped the youkai merge very easily in the light-less landscape; the sound of his footsteps was the only way to locate him. Naturally, Kanda's presence was enough to keep most of them well-hidden in their dens. Therefore, the shikigami could peacefully enjoy the walk; not that he actually enjoyed having a walk, but at least it was silent, allowing him to let his anger out freely as he was doing right now.

Just what was wrong with him? Why did those memories from over a thousand years ago hurt him that much _now_? He thought he had been able to let them rust in a corner of his mind, so why now? _Because they remind you of how useless you used to be yourself._ Wrong! He had never been useless, it was just that _they_ had never acknowledged the range of his powers, simply because he was always second to _him_. _Still feeding your hatred for them, huh?_

An eerie smirk appeared on Kanda's lips. No, he wasn't feeling any hatred towards them anymore, since they had all died. By his hand. The last thought was enough to ease Kanda's frustration and, with a lighter mood, he kept walking in the middle of the dark forest.

What was the brat doing right now? Probably sitting in a corner of his room lamenting about his pitiful life, as usual. The youkai shook his head. How the hell could he be so concerned about such a useless creature? The brat was a mere human, therefore he was weak. For Kanda, it was easy. Humans were weak by nature, no matter how hard they tried, no matter how much spiritual energy they could have. Yet, the black-haired youkai couldn't erase that single human off his mind, that human who was supposed to be his master. He blamed it on the boy's silver hair that gave him the appearance of an old man and was the reason why people kept calling him a demon. Stupid humans. It would be a shame for the demons to have such a weakling in their ranks. Yet that same weakling was Kanda's master.

A brainless master who was too stubborn to admit the attraction he had for his shikigami. Which irritated the said shikigami to no end. Seeing the boy always acting in contradiction with his words, always blushing every time Kanda came too close while affirming that he hated him, all those hit on the youkai's nerves. To which extent could humans be dumb? Or rather, to which extent could the brat be dumb? Maybe he liked torturing himself by resisting his own feelings, who knows? The way the human mind worked was a mystery to Kanda. To him, if you wanted something, you simply took it. Easy.

On that last thought, the youkai decided it was time for him to check on his master. If the idiotic brat couldn't make up his mind, then Kanda would do it for him.

* * *

"I'm so looking forward to going to the Festival this year!"

"Yes, me too. You know what? I managed to invite Lydia out, she'll come with me to the Festival!"

"Seriously? Damn, I envy you. I'm going with my parents, they said they'd come to the capital to see me. Well, I suppose it'll be fun anyway!"

"Do you know which Exorcists are going to take part in the Rite of Purification?"

"No, I didn't hear anything about it but the Festival is in one week so we should know soon."

"I'd really like Miss Lenalee to be chosen, she would look great dressed with the celebration costume."

"Hey, be careful of what you say. I'll report this to Lydia!"

Allen glanced absentmindedly at the two students who were talking and laughing together as they walked past the garden of the Temple. It was true that the Festival of the Emperor was coming near, and while most people were looking forward to it, it was of no interest to the boy.

The Festival was a very important celebration held every year which started on the night of the full moon with the Rite of Purification. During the Rite, the Emperor along with priests, priestesses and two Exorcists of the Temple of the Black Order formed a long procession from the palace to the main shrine of the city. There, offerings and prayers were made to the gods who protected the whole country in order to keep harmony between youkai and humans. Without the protection of the gods, the two races wouldn't be able to cohabit on the same blessed land of Japan.

After the ceremony was done, there were three full days of festivities, and everyone was given permission to take a break from work to enjoy the Festival. Every year, musicians, dancers and many other artists gave performances all day and night, food shops and stands with various games for children popped out like mushrooms, allowing everyone to have fun.

Theoretically. In reality, Allen was one of the very few people who didn't particularly enjoy the Festival. He took pleasure in attending the Rite of Purification because of its sacred nature, but the three days of festivities had never interested him. After the Rite, he would usually go back to the Temple alone, and enjoy the silence and quietness of the place.

Oh, of course Lavi and Lenalee offered him to come with them every year, but Allen was clever enough to know that his friends wouldn't mind spending some good time with the two of them only. So the silver-haired boy would always find an excuse not to come, and the two other Exorcists wouldn't insist.

This year would be no different. But the Festival was not Allen's main preoccupation right now. Right now, he was trying to control his inner barriers, to use his whole energy as he wished and above all, he was trying to get used to the idea that he possessed far more spiritual energy than any average Exorcist. To him, who had always been seen as a weak Exorcist who couldn't be of any help, it was a thought that made him uneasy.

After lifting his barriers twice, he had been able to grasp the mechanism and could now control them properly. However, his use of his energy was more than random and Allen had a pretty good idea of why.

_You won't improve with a messed up mind like this._

Allen shook his head. A part of him knew it was true while the other part categorically refused to give any credit to the words of a demon.

And there was something else. The way he had managed to learn how to control his barriers was the main reason of his reluctance. In order for him to lift his barriers, Kanda had deliberately put Lavi's life in danger; and the fact that the redhead had agreed to it didn't change anything.

To put it simply, Allen couldn't stand his shikigami's way of handling things. The day after Lavi's rescue, he and Kanda had argued rather violently, the former saying that it was totally irresponsible to put others' lives in danger for the sole sake of training him, and the latter merely replying that it was the only way to make a brat like Allen stronger and that it was the boy's own problem if he'd rather prioritize other people's lives before his own.

Since then, Allen hadn't addressed Kanda even once. During the day, he avoided the youkai as much as possible, for fear of not being able to suppress his anger. Still, it didn't prevent the fact that he could sense Kanda's presence anytime, which was all the more irritating.

The boy, who was sitting under his favourite tree, sighed loudly. Everything was going wrong since that fateful day when he had taken Kanda as his shikigami. Kanda was a demon, his hands were tainted with more blood than Allen could imagine, he was still thinking about killing people and he would never stop thinking about it.

Allen felt nauseous; he was Kanda's last master, meaning that after his death, Kanda would be free to let his demonic urges take over him again, with no restrictions. And Allen couldn't do anything to prevent it from happening. Except getting killed by another youkai.

For a second, Allen's heartbeat increased. After all, why not? Why not find a youkai and tell it to kill him, without Kanda knowing. That way, he would lose all his powers and become a harmless, pitiful youkai. _'That would serve him right.'_ Allen thought, seriously considering his plan. After all, Kanda himself said that Allen didn't care about his own life, so that would just prove the youkai right.

The silver-haired boy shook his head. There was a huge flaw in the plan. The Earl. Allen didn't know what that demon's purpose was, but the simple fact that the Earl had ordered the destruction of dozens of villages was enough for Allen to decide that he couldn't let such a demon act freely. And though reluctantly, he had to admit that Kanda was the only one who could be on par with the Earl and his underlings. Not only Kanda, but himself as well. The thought almost made him chuckle. Allen Walker, an Exorcist powerful enough to face the Earl. How comical. And for that one reason, he couldn't afford acting selfishly.

Where was Kanda right now? Allen was tempted to call his shikigami, but his stubbornness stopped him. He didn't give a damn about Kanda, he couldn't stand his arrogance, he couldn't stand his presence, he couldn't stand his mere existence! Then why the hell couldn't he keep Kanda out of his mind? Why was he trying to avoid him, while still wanting to know where he was and what he was doing? Why couldn't he help but expect that Kanda would appear out of nowhere to annoy him? And why, why was he so frustrated that the youkai hadn't sent him a single wave of energy since their argument?

Rationally speaking, Kanda was only following Allen's order not to do it unless necessary. However, nothing was rational when it came to Kanda. Allen shook his head and buried his face in his long sleeves. What had he done to deserve such cruelty? His wish was to live a normal, simple life. Nothing else. And yet, he was denied that wish.

He spent another hour sitting under the pine, unaware of the time passing, his mind too tormented to notice a youkai watching him for all that time from the roof of the Temple, long and ebony hair floating in the wind.

* * *

Night had fallen on the Temple, and the common room was now full with students, teachers and Exorcists having dinner while chatting happily with their neighbours, and the main topic was of course the Festival of the Emperor.

"So it's official now, the ones chosen for the Rite are Exorcist Marie and Exorcist Miranda, right?" a student asked.

"Yeah, a pity Miss Lenalee won't take part. I wanted to see her in the ceremony costume, I bet she'd have been beautiful." another one replied, disappointed.

A bit farther from them, Allen couldn't help but chuckle silently while a smile drew on Lenalee's lips. However, Lavi pouted and mumbled:

"Hey, hey, the kids should watch their mouths."

"Why so? That was a compliment, and I'm pretty sure you'd have liked to see me in the costume as well." Lenalee teased.

"Wh-oh, never mind." the red-haired replied, sulking and making both Allen and Lenalee laugh. "Anyway, are you coming with us this year, Allen?" he went on more casually.

The boy was caught off guard by the question but reacted quickly:

"Ah well, I think I'll go watch the Rite then come back to the Temple…"

"… as you do every year." Lenalee finished for him. "Seriously, Allen. Why don't you come with us once? I'm sure you'll appreciate it, there are plenty of artists and cooks from the imperial palace, and some even come from overseas. At least, try to come the first day then if you really don't like the festivities, you can go back to the Temple."

"No, it's ok Lenalee. Don't worry about me, I really don't feel at ease in those kind of events."

"I suppose we can't force you if you don't want to." Lavi said, sighing. "Anyway, everyone's done eating? Then I suggest we go get some fresh air outside!" he added on a happier tone.

"Fresh? Freezing cold you mean!" Lenalee retorted as she got up anyway and prepared to leave.

The three of them exited the common room, and on their way back to their respective rooms, Lavi decided to ask the boy:

"Hey Allen, I haven't seen your shikigami around you lately. Has he decided to finally let you live in peace?" Allen didn't miss Lavi's careful tone.

"Something like that, yes." he replied.

Noticing that the boy wasn't willing to add anything else, Lenalee quickly changed the topic:

"I think I'll go see Miranda tomorrow. She was so stressed this afternoon when my brother announced that she was chosen for the Rite of Purification, I'll have to calm her down somehow."

"Miranda? I think I've never talked to her." Allen said pensively. "But she sure looked like she was about to faint this afternoon. Marie seems ok though."

"Haha, that guy is as tough as a rock!" Lavi declared, nodding. "He'll be able to help Miranda out if she forgets to do something during the Rite. Oops, here's my room. See you tomorrow then!" he added before leaving the two other Exorcists who wished him good night.

The Chinese girl also went back to her room and Allen starting heading for his own but stopped midway. He knew that Kanda was in his room, as usual, and he wasn't that eager to see his shikigami right now. Allen shook his head. No, he wasn't going to let Kanda decide on how he felt, how he thought, how he acted. The boy took a deep breath in, and walked to his room. If Kanda was in there, then he would simply ignore him.

He slid the panel open and walked in. As expected, Kanda was sitting in his usual position at his usual spot, eyes closed, face partly lit by the small lamp next to him. For the hundredth time, Allen stared at that flawless face, from the delicate eyebrows to the straight nose and those thin lips which could only smirk and utter poisonous words; that demonic, handsome face framed by long, dark hair falling perfectly on his shoulders… And Allen found himself being irresistibly attracted by the inviting and invisible darkness surrounding the demon. Again.

Allen bit his lip. Deep ithin him, he knew perfectly that it wasn't Kanda's powerful spiritual energy that drew him to the youkai anymore, for he possessed quite an amount himself. And that was what confused the boy the most; he had thought that, by becoming more powerful, he would be able to erase the fascination he had for his shikigami. How wrong he was. Since the night when Kanda's energy had been mixed with his, it had gotten worse and worse, no matter how much Allen struggled to fight back the attraction he considered disgusting and degrading.

That's why Allen kept trying to convince himself that he loathed the demon which was quietly sitting in front of him, unaware of the storm in the boy's head. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but no sound came from it as his lips silently articulated the only words he could think of at that moment.

_I hate you._

It was almost like a mantra to him; repeating those words over and over again in his head was his only way to ease his mind whenever it became too confused. Allen decided to calm down and simply go sleep. As silently as he could, he undressed and put on his night clothes – a dark green kimono. As he was done tying the belt, a voice right behind him made him jump:

"You really are hopeless."

Allen immediately turned round only to find himself facing Kanda, who was now standing way too close for his own comfort. The boy tried to step backwards but Kanda gripped him by his collar and pulled him back to him.

"Oh no, you're not going anywhere this time." the youkai said with a tone Allen couldn't identify. "How long do you plan to act like a stupid brat?" Now that tone was definitely not nice to hear.

"Let me go." Allen ordered sharply.

"Oh? So now the little brat has enough guts to talk back instead of being frozen on the spot? That's an improvement, indeed." Kanda sneered.

"I don't care about your opinion. Just let go of me."

"You don't care about my opinion yet you've been avoiding me because I said you are a fool to value others' lives over yours."

"There's nothing wrong with not wanting to see someone like you. Seeing you pisses me off, hearing pisses me off, everything in you pisses me off!" Allen snapped as he stared straight in Kanda's eyes defiantly.

"Yet you want to call me whenever you don't see me around. It's no use hiding it, I can feel it in your energy."

"Don't speak nonsense! I d…"

"You can't notice it, but your energy fluctuates whenever you are upset or confused. And it's been fluctuating pretty much lately." Kanda added with a smirk.

For a second, Allen was at loss for words. How could a demon read him so clearly? Not that the boy would openly admit that Kanda was right.

"I don't care about your pointless talk. Now let go of me, I want to sleep. And this is an order. Shikigami are supposed to listen to their master's orders." he declared dryly. He didn't fail to notice the twitch on Kanda's face and for a second, he thought he had managed to make the youkai shut up; however the latter didn't waste time proving him wrong:

"Don't start getting so cheeky." Kanda said in a dangerous tone. "You're still a brat who needs to grow up and be taught some manners. And it will be my pleasure to teach them to you."

With no effort, he pushed Allen backwards, making the boy lose his balance, and pinned him on the futon with one hand.

"Wh-" Allen started struggling, but Kanda's grip was too strong for him.

"Shut up." Kanda cut him as he leant over the boy. "You're a pain in the neck. None of the Exorcists I had to serve were so stupid as you. Let me tell you something: you may possess a great amount of energy, but because of your stubbornness this energy is being wasted."

"I don't see what you m…" Allen said, still wriggling under Kanda.

"I said shut up." Kanda silenced the boy again, very irritated. "I'm pretty sure your teachers taught you that your state of mind is reflected in your energy, am I wrong? Meaning that as long as your mind is chaotic, so is your energy. And nothing good can come out of a chaotic energy."

"My mind isn't…"

"And I'm telling you to stop denying it! And stop fidgeting like this!" Kanda added as he roughly pinned Allen's arm next to his head, making the boy wince.

"Why do you care so much about what I think of you!" Allen snapped, exasperated. Kanda stared at him, visibly wondering whether the boy was an idiot or not.

"I do not care about what you think of me, stupid brat." he went on, trying to control his annoyance. "The only thing I care about is that you're going to be a hindrance with a messed up energy like yours. Don't think that you can control it perfectly simply because you learnt how to lift your barriers. There's no way you can beat the Earl in your state."

Allen opened his eyes wide, then looked away, keeping silent for several seconds before speaking again, on a quieter tone this time:

"So that's it, huh? It's always about my energy, my powers, my usefulness as an Exorcist…"

"What's with you, Moyashi?" Kanda asked, intrigued by the boy's sudden change of behaviour.

"…"

"Oi, Moyashi." the youkai insisted, annoyed. As he still got no reaction from the boy, he sent him a wave of energy and had the satisfaction to see him gasp and turn his displeased silver eyes to him:

"What did you do that for? I told you not to do it unless necessary!"

"Che. Dare tell me you haven't been waiting for me to do it for these past few days." Kanda merely replied, leaning a bit closer to Allen who didn't manage to suppress the blush on his face.

"D-don't come that close!" the boy stuttered in vain, squirming on his futon, but Kanda prevented him from moving by using his body to immobilize him.

"I keep telling you that I know humans well enough to tell what they really want, despite what they say."

Allen was about to reply but the only sound which came out from his mouth was a gasp as he felt a pair of lips on his exposed neck – when did Kanda open his collar? No coherent thought came to the boy's mind at that moment, the feeling of warm lips trailing on his neck was enough to distract him from anything else. But no, this was wrong.

"Kan…da… this isn't funny… stop this immediately…" he said, making an attempt at freeing himself from Kanda.

"You're not convincing at all." the black-haired youkai merely answered before opening Allen's collar wider and pressing his lips on the warm skin again.

Allen's heart was racing uncontrollably, his arms were shaking slightly and his breathing was getting louder. But for heaven's sake, it was Kanda who was putting him in that state! This was so wrong! Yet those few kisses felt incredibly good. Allen bit his lip, mentally cursing himself for being so weak. And it wasn't as if his shikigami was trying very hard to keep him under control. At the same time, it wasn't as if Allen was trying very hard to escape from his grip.

But he had to. This was a test to try his will to resist temptation. Kanda was a demon; of course he'd try him, and it was up to him not to succumb to what the demon offered him, no matter how appealing it was. With his free arm, he grabbed Kanda's hair – soft and silky hair – making the youkai raise his head to him.

"Stop it Kanda." he managed to utter with some firmness.

Kanda stared at the boy under him, and a smirk slowly drew on his lips.

"Make me." he said, sending a new wave of energy. Once again, Allen's body was engulfed with the familiar warm feeling, and the boy had to release Kanda's hair to bite his own sleeve in order not to let any sound out. Seeing it, Kanda's smirk grew wider:

"Stop that useless fight, Moyashi. You know you like it, so there's nothing wrong with expressing it."

Nothing wrong? Of course it was wrong! Wrong and pleasurable at the same time… What was he thinking? How could he feel any pleasure in this? Kanda, a demon, a demon, _a demon_! Allen kept repeating in his head; yes, but a demon with gorgeous human features. Again, a new wave hit him, and Allen bit even tighter on his sleeve.

"Che. I'll make you admit it, whether you want it or no."

With the hand that wasn't holding Allen's arm, Kanda untied the belt of Allen's kimono and opened it, making the boy shiver. The youkai took several seconds to observe the pale and naked body exposed under him; well he could see it every night and every morning when Allen changed his clothes, but this was the first time he could see those trembling legs from this close, the white skin contrasting with the dark color of the boy's kimono that was barely covering his arms now, this was the first time he got to see Allen breathing so heavily, his cheeks flushed with heat and embarrassment, and this was the first time he could leisurely run his fingers on the warm skin and see it shudder under the touch. Admirable view, indeed.

Allen still refused to let go of his sleeve, determined not to give Kanda the satisfaction of letting him hear his helplessness. But was he actually resisting? Or was he slowly letting himself drown into that demon's game, gradually falling into his sweet trap and yielding to what his senses had been instilling in him since the first time he had met Kanda...

The boy shut his eyes tight when he felt Kanda's mouth on his belly, then on his chest, then on his collarbone. His body arched under the kisses, ignoring what the little reason he had left was screaming at him. And for the first time, he felt terribly aroused.

"Look at me." he heard Kanda's voice.

After a few seconds of hesitation, Allen opened his eyes, and silver melted into dark blue in a hypnotic trance.

"Your arm is getting in the way, Moyashi. Stop biting your sleeve and let me hear you."

Allen gulped under Kanda's piercing gaze and slowly let go of his arm, unable to disobey as he was swallowed into those dark, bottomless pools which were Kanda's eyes.

"Now tell me you like it when I do this." the demon whispered at his ear. He pressed his body against Allen bare chest and sent a new wave of his energy, hard, powerful, to make sure the boy would receive it to the core of his being.

"Kanda!" Allen cried unwillingly, caught off guard by the sudden shock that made him shudder violently. The youkai smirked, satisfied.

"Not so loud, Moyashi. You wouldn't like anyone to know what's happening here, would you?"

No, of course he wouldn't. If someone ever heard about what Kanda was doing to him, shame and humiliation wouldn't be quite enough to describe how he'd be feeling. Even now, he was torn in two; a part of him was feeling disgusted by his own submission to a demonic creature, while the other part was thrilled by the forbidden pleasure the same creature was giving him. However, Allen had the feeling that the second part was slowly taking over him, erasing any trace of guilt in him.

He had already lost control of his body, entirely in Kanda's care, and though the boy wondered for an instant how a demon could possibly know how to handle something like that, he quickly dismissed the thought when he felt a hand trailing over his thigh then brushing against that part of him that made his arousal obvious. Allen immediately covered his mouth with his free hand to suppress the gasp that came to him, which didn't please Kanda.

"Stubborn brat."

The youkai grabbed Allen's wrist and pinned both the boy's arms above his head with one hand, while forcing three fingers of his other hand in the boy's mouth and saying: "Lick them."

Allen opened his eyes wide at the command, and wanted to shake his head but again, Kanda's gaze on him made his already faltered will shatter. So he complied and coated Kanda's long fingers with his own saliva, until the youkai decided it was enough and pulled them out.

"What was that f…" Allen started, but was cut straight as Kanda's fingers moved to a place he'd never imagined could be touched by someone else. "Kanda! What are you… Nghh!" He squirmed at the sudden violation of his intimacy, not even believing that such a thing could happen, yet Kanda was showing him that it could.

"Stop resisting like that, you'll only hurt yourself." Kanda said.

It was unpleasant, to say the least, but Allen was getting more or less used to the feeling. His breathing was erratic and in spite of himself, he could barely suppress the soft moans and gasps that Kanda was drawing out of him.

"Kan…da…aah…st-stop it…I can't…Kanda…please…"

"Even now you're still telling me to stop it? How stubborn. Then let's go on, shall we?"

And before Allen could add anything else, electricity shot through his spine as he felt Kanda rub against a certain area within him and couldn't help but arch his back and let a cry escape his lips:

"Kanda!"

With a smirk, the youkai kept going a few more times, earning loud gasps from the boy underneath him, then he pulled his fingers out and released Allen's arms to untie his own belt and open his kimono, giving Allen a breathtaking view of his perfectly built chest marred by that strange black tattoo. But what made his cheeks even redder than how they already were was when he glanced at Kanda's lower body. Despite the fact that Kanda looked entirely like a human, there was no way such a perfect creature could be called a human. But Kanda was a demon, and when he pressed himself against Allen once more, the contact between their bodies made the boy let his desire for Kanda run freely in his veins. Pleasure was building up in him, making him yearn for more and he wrapped his arms around his shikigami's neck, letting his long and black hair fall freely around his face and whispered, like a plea:

"Kanda, I can't take this anymore… Do something… Anything."

"Are finally admitting you like this?" Kanda asked.

"…"

"Che."

He lifted one of Allen's legs, and the second after, the boy stifled a cry by pressing his hand over his mouth as a wave of sharp pain tore him apart, though he didn't manage to prevent tears from appearing at the corner of his eyes. Gods, how could that even be possible? To have a demon hurt him like that, shredding anything intimate in him, possessing his body like a mere prey… And finding himself not being able to reject that sinful degradation. A painful thrust in him made him shut his eyes tight and bite his sleeve again. His other arm was still tightly wrapped around Kanda's neck. Tears fell down both his cheeks, but soon after, a thumb was delicately wiping them away, and he heard Kanda murmuring at his ear:

"Dare tell me you haven't wanted to feel me like this. Dare say it." Allen kept shaking his head, but his thoughts were not matching his actions. How many times had he been so enthralled by Kanda to the point that it felt painfully good simply looking at his shikigami? As painfully good as he was feeling right now, drowned in the pulsing pleasure Kanda was giving him with each movement of his body. At the same time, Allen could feel Kanda continually pouring some of his energy in him as if to ease the pain which was actually fading, gradually being replaced with a pleasure so far unknown to the boy. And having Kanda take care of his manhood only helped increase that pleasure to an extent he had never believed could exist. He choked back his silent sobs, but tears kept falling anyway. This time, Kanda leant over him and kissed the tear away, with unsuspected care and gentleness. Then he pulled Allen's arm away, without forcing though, and got the pleasure to hear the boy gasp at each of his thrusts.

Allen was trapped in that forbidden garden of pleasure, and didn't even want to try and escape from it. The little voice at the back of his mind which was screaming that this was contrary to nature was no more, leaving the room free for the intense passion he was living right now. He was being taken by a demon, and so what? He was already tainted by that same demon's energy to begin with.

"Kanda…" he unconsciously called his shikigami's name. Kanda raised an eyebrow as he heard his name, but noticing that the boy was too immersed into his own fight not to lose the little sanity he had left, he simply put his lips on the pale neck and started sucking on it, though gently, earning him a hiss from Allen.

"Kanda… I can't... hold it anymore…"

"Then don't." Kanda murmured at the boy's ear.

In a matter of seconds, Allen felt his own release over him and Kanda's within him, filling him with a warm sensation that was far different from anything he had experienced until now. They remained there, not moving for several minutes before Kanda slowly pulled himself out and rolled onto the side of the futon, and both of them lay there, panting, their kimono more or less on, silent.

After a moment, Allen reached out his hand to his Exorcist clothes and started cleaning himself, though his hand was still slightly shaking. As he did so, Kanda watched him without saying a word then finally grabbed the boy's hand and finished the job for him.

"Th-thanks, Kanda."

"Che." Kanda merely replied before sitting up, but a hand grabbed his wrist and he turned his head to see Allen also trying to sit up, wincing a bit.

"Just sleep already. I'm not going anywhere soon." Kanda said.

"No, it's not that. It's just…" the boy stopped, confused. He had suddenly had an impulse to kiss Kanda but he was now hesitating, because he had the feeling that by closing his lips over his shikigami's, their relationship would bear a whole different meaning, a meaning he refused to name. To him, a kiss was something shared only between two persons who held true affection for each other, it was the expression of deep lo… How ridiculous and naive. That unspoken word couldn't possibly describe the bond between him and Kanda. And what nonsense. Kanda had just claimed his body in the most intimate way possible yet a mere kiss was making him hesitate?

"Oi, what's…" Kanda started, but was immediately interrupted as soft lips pressed against his. For a second, he was truly taken off guard by Allen's action but soon took control of the situation again, mentally smirking as he could feel the boy's uncertainty in the kiss.

Allen slowly pulled back, his breathing uneven and his cheeks unusually hot. He didn't dare meet Kanda's gaze on him; instead he barely managed to stutter some incomprehensible apologies, only to be cut by Kanda:

"Idiot, just go sleep already."

The boy merely nodded and lay back on his futon, not even bothering to close his kimono as he pulled the blanket over him. At the same time, Kanda got up, put the lamp out and turned back only to see the boy deeply asleep. A smirk appeared on his lips.

Making up the brat's mind for him was definitely a good plan.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Darn. My chapters keep getting longer and longer. -_-  
To be honest, I'm very anxious about this chapter. So don't hesitate to tell me if it lacked something, if it was too long, too lame, too.... I dunno. And don't worry about Kanda's memories (the ones in this chapter and the ones in the previous one), I plan to give some more details in the next chapters.

Thanks to all the readers/reviewers for your support, it really helps. :]


	12. Your Feelings, at Last

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property

* * *

**Chapter 12 - Your feelings, at last  
**

_Imperial Palace_

"Excuse me, do you know where the storage room for ceremonial items is?" a young servant asked another one who was passing by in the corridor. "I'm new here and I was told to bring some stuff there."

"The storage room? It's next to the imperial temple but there are guards in front of the door and the only ones who are allowed to go in are the priests and the Emperor." the other answered. "If you're not accompanied by one of them, the guards won't let you in."

"Oh, I see. So I need to ask a priest then?"

"Yeah, you know where the imperial temple is?"

The young servant nodded and after thanking the other, quickly left to the temple outside the main palace. There, he spotted a priest sweeping the stone floor; however, instead of going to him, the servant hid behind a pillar and quickly looked around him to check that no one could see him. His facial features started transforming, turning his face into the priest's one, his hair disappeared to leave room to a bald head looking exactly like the priest's. Then, with a gesture of his hand, his servant clothes turned into a priest's robe. Satisfied with the transformation, he glanced once more around him then hurried to the building next to the temple, careful not to be seen by anyone.

In front of the storage room, two guards were indeed keeping the door. As soon as they saw the "priest", they bowed and stepped aside, opening the two panels of the door. The priest nodded to them, and entered the room, hearing the doors being closed behind him. Several lamps were lighting the small room, allowing the priest to give a careful look around him. He was visibly looking for something, and after a minute of scanning, a small smile appeared on his lips as he walked towards a table on which a box made of ebony was lying. He held out his hand to the box but his fingers had barely touched the wood that it burnt his skin, making him hiss in pain. Of course there were protections against youkai, it wasn't as if he hadn't expected it; however, such a level of protection couldn't possibly be efficient on a demon of his calibre. He quickly opened the box, trying to ignore the sharp pain coming from the wounds and the soft sound of flesh being burnt by the wood, to reveal several pieces of paper.

There were scriptures written with black ink on them; the priest held his hand over them, and uttered an incantation. Red and glowing characters appeared on the pieces of paper for several seconds, then vanished, as if absorbed by the paper. With a smile of satisfaction, the priest walked out then, after making sure no one could see him, he turned into a black cat and disappeared from the palace.

The Earl would be satisfied. Everything was now ready for the Rite of Purification.

* * *

_Everything was pitch black around him. Alone, in the middle of nowhere, he was running without knowing where his steps would lead him, without even seeing where they would lead him. Voices echoed around him._

Filth.

Trash.

_The boy shut his eyes tight as he kept running, shaking his head._

Contrary to nature.

Monster.

_He wanted to shout 'No! No!' but no sound could come out of his mouth._

Disgusting.

Shameless.

_He covered his ears with his hands, running, running and running even more._

Disappear from this world and spare this sacred land from your rotten presence.

_It was no use covering his ears. The words were echoing directly in his head._

Knock knock.

_What was that sound? _Knock knock._ Somebody knocking at a door?_

Allen!

_Who was calling him? No! He didn't want anyone to see him, to know what he had done, or rather, what he had let a demon do to him._

"Allen!"

The boy woke up with a start, panting and trembling.

"Allen, are you in there? Can I come in?" Lavi's voice rose from behind the door. It took Allen several seconds to realize he was awake and that somebody was calling him.

"L-Lavi?"

"Oh Allen, you're actually there. I'm coming in."

"No!" Allen replied a bit too quickly. He went on on a cooler tone: "Please, no. I-I'm feeling a bit tired. I'll come out later."

"You're sure? Allen, it's late morning you know? Lenalee and I were wondering if something happened to you since we didn't see you for the whole morning. You want me to call a doctor?"

"No, don't worry, I'm fine. I'll come out later." the boy repeated, though he knew perfectly well that his tone wasn't convincing at all, and the clear suspicion he could hear in Lavi's voice was evidence of it.

"... Fine. But if you're not out for lunch, I'll come back and drag you out, ok?"

"Y-yes. Thanks, Lavi."

Allen heard Lavi leaving, and took a deep breath in. Kanda wasn't in the room.

Kanda...

The boy suddenly felt nauseous. Flashes of what had happened during the previous night came back to him, and for a second he hoped that it had all been a bad dream; however, a mere glance on the side proved him wrong. The Exorcist robe he had used to clean himself was still lying next to him and, as he made an attempt at sitting up, the soreness in his entire body made him face reality. He opened his eyes wide. What had he done? _'Calm down, calm down, calm down.'_ he repeated mentally. After taking a deep breath in, he allowed himself to think about the past night.

He had accepted the seed of a demon in him without even fighting back. He had succumbed to the attraction of a creature that wasn't even human simply because he had been incapable of showing the least bit of willpower. And now his body was impregnated with the sin of a demon. The blunt observation fell on him like a boulder.

Allen remained as motionless as a statue for several minutes, still not believing what had happened on the previous night. He pulled his knees to his chest and let his forehead rest on them, in a pure state of apathy. Then, after another few minutes, his lips slowly stretched into a weird grin before letting a nervous laugh escape.

Good grief. A demon. And him. It had happened too quickly for Allen. For sure, he couldn't say he hadn't enjoyed it the least bit, though he wasn't going to admit openly. It was human to enjoy carnal pleasure, after all. A question flashed through the boy's mind; did Kanda – who was a demon – enjoy such kinds of pleasure as well? Or was it simply a way like any other to entertain himself?

Allen shook his head and sighed heavily. Dear gods. It had happened too quickly. That damn shikigami didn't have any notion of delicacy in him; of course Allen had kept denying his attraction for the demon, of course his stubbornness exasperated him, but for heaven's sake, Kanda had almost forced him! _Almost._ That stupid, brainless demon had showed him once again that he was still a pretty efficient-less master, and the thought made Allen clench his fists. There he was again, with his lack of power and whatnot. Naturally, he could keep blaming himself for his own weakness, but right now, his frustration was directed at Kanda, who was the centre of his problems, and who was the reason why Allen was having a powerful headache hammering his skull right now.

Kanda. If he had never met that incarnation of the devil, everything would have been fine. Or at least, if Kanda didn't have such handsome features, if he didn't have _human_ features, it would have been all right. Not many shikigami possessed the physical envelope of a human, after all. Only the most powerful ones. Like the shikigami of Cross Marian. That man wasn't really considered an official Exorcist of the Temple because he kept disappearing here and there and would come back only when he felt like it. Allen had seen his shikigami only once and the memory of that youkai was still fresh in his memory; it was a beautiful woman with wings like a butterfly's masking her face. For a second; Allen wondered whether Cross Marian and his shikigami had also... He quickly dismissed the twisted thought. No one could be as weak as him and fall that low.

"Damn it!" It was more than rare for the boy to curse, but today his level of frustration was such that he couldn't act like his usual self. Deep inside him, Allen was beginning to realize that he truly wished for his relationship with his shikigami to improve, maybe not to the same extent as Lenalee or Lavi with their own shikigami, but at least to something that rendered both of them efficient. But that... that bastard Kanda had rushed things in his own way, without any care for Allen's opinion, and that's what was making the boy mad right now. Why couldn't he obey his master like any normal shikigami? _'Because he's a demon.' _Allen answered his own question. And he loathed demons.

Or did he? Allen sighed heavily. He certainly nourished a great hatred towards youkai, but now that he thought about it, wasn't it a mere excuse to justify his behaviour towards Kanda and towards his duties as an Exorcist? Actually... Saying he hated youkai... Had it become a mere habit, without much real feeling behind those words?

Allen let out a new sigh. _'Gods, what a hassle.'_ Thanks to a single night, the boy was reviewing most of his way of thinking, of acting, of living. Still, it didn't mean he was grateful to Kanda for that. The fact that his shikigami had almost forced him was real, and that was the one thing Allen couldn't forgive. He needed more authority, but the mere thought of it almost made him laugh. Authority, the one quality he had never considered possessing. However, it was more than time to make Kanda understand their respective roles.

The rational part in Allen told him that he was contradicting himself; he was willing to make effort to improve his interactions with his shikigami while refusing to let him get close. This was beginning to get complicated.

"Stupid shikigami!" Allen hissed. To say he was upset against Kanda was an understatement.

And as an answer to his last words, a wave of energy was sent to him, making him jump. Kanda was calling him.

Sudden and unexplainable panic seized the boy. He didn't want to see his shikigami! Allen could feel him coming, but he didn't want to meet him! Not now, at least. He needed time.

The boy hurriedly grabbed new clothes, got dressed and stormed out of his room. He ran out of the Temple, without paying attention to the few people who glanced at him questioningly, he ran into the forest until he was breathless, and even then he kept running farther. His mind had become a total mess, no coherent nor rational thoughts could come to him. The only thing he had in mind was to get as far as possible from the Temple.

In the end, his legs failed him and forced him to stop. As he was taking his breath back, he noticed that Kanda's energy wasn't near this area, meaning that his shikigami hadn't followed him. Good. Allen gave a look around him, to see that he was near the edge of the forest, next to the river. He rose an eyebrow; he had gotten that far? _'Well, since I'm here, I might as well go wash my face a bit.'_

He walked to the river, knelt down and splashed some water on his face. The freshness of the water seemed to cool the boy down. Or not. As his mind fully awakened, he suddenly grasped the full extent of what he had really done with Kanda, and the first feeling that came to him was horror. Him. With a demon. As if losing his innocence at his age wasn't enough, he had lost it to a _demon_.

For a second he considered plunging himself fully in the icy water to wash the stain on his body away. He wanted to scrub his skin raw to forget the burning touches of Kanda's fingers on him and the warmth in him as Kanda's body was pressed against his, he wanted to erase the shameful pleasure he had had when Kanda was inside him, he wanted to let himself drown in the river to freeze his senses that had led him to this disgrace. He who loathed youkai to no end had allowed one of them to... He couldn't even think about it. The voices in his nightmare were right, that was absolutely contrary to nature. Such revulsion for his own person could barely be withstood by the fifteen-year-old boy and he ended up throwing up.

Slightly panting, he washed his face once again then stared at his reflection in the water, disgusted by himself. A feeling of hatred seized him, but it was hatred towards himself, towards his own weakness. He was weak, despite the considerable amount of power he had. He was weak, because he couldn't even have his shikigami to obey him. That thought made Allen boil inside. He possessed power; now he needed to use it to clearly show Kanda who the master was. He was going to train even more, until Kanda acknowledged him as his master.

It was at that moment that he felt several energies from some youkai in the vicinity. Oh, nothing actually serious, but enough to annoy Allen who really wasn't in the mood to bear the presence of any youkai around him. He got up and lifted his barriers.

Those youkai would regret having crossed his path.

_

* * *

_

"E-Earl! What's the meaning of this?" a shocked Tyki asked as he saw the demon that had just come out from the shadows and was now standing beside the Earl. Next to Tyki, Jasdevi was on a fighting stance, eyes filled with desire to kill. Even Lulubell – who was the most placid of all – couldn't hide her surprise. She wanted to clench her fists, but the bandages on her hands prevented her from doing so. The burns were still hurting. A few other youkai were gathered there as well, and each of them had an incredulous look displayed on their faces. The only one who still had a wide grin on her face was Road.

"Yeah, what's that bastard doing here?" Jasdevi spat with disdain.

"Now, now my children." the Earl said with a reassuring tone. "I thought it was time for me to introduce you to our new family member."

"WHAT!!" Jasdevi exclaimed while protests started rising among the small group of youkai. "There's no way that... that... that guy is gonna join us!" he added, pointing a shaking finger at the said guy. "Earl! Just what..."

Jasdevi didn't manage to finish his sentence as he met with the Earl's icy stare, which was enough to make him shut his mouth. He gulped, then went on on a cooler tone:

"W-well, I'm just wondering how he ended up here. I mean, he's..."

"He's a shikigami." Tyki finished carefully before addressing the girl-like youkai: "Road, would you happen to know? You don't look surprised at all."

The only answer he received from the girl was a wider grin. Exasperated, Lulubell ended up asking with as much respect as she could put in her tone, despite her troubled look:

"Earl, we would all like you to explain why the demon Kanda is standing next to you at this very moment."

A broad grin revealed the Earl's two lines of white, perfect teeth. He turned his head to the newcomer and gestured him to step forward.

"Would you please introduce yourself?" Though it was a question, the Earl's tone as he pronounced the words made it sound more like an order. The addressed demon nodded, then stepped forward and glanced at all the youkai in front of him, visibly satisfied of the effect he had. Then, a faint smirk on his lips, he said:

"I'll be grateful if you don't mistake me for my trash twin. My name is Kanrou.

_

* * *

_

"Don't you seriously have the faintest idea of where Allen could be?" Lavi asked Kanda carefully. Next to him, Lenalee didn't even dare look at the youkai. They were still slightly afraid of Kanda, especially when Allen wasn't there.

"No." the youkai replied, annoyed. It was a lie, of course, but it was none of these two Exorcists' business.

About half an hour ago, he had called the brat with his spiritual energy and located him in his room. But right after the call, he had felt the idiot's energy messing up like never before, as if the boy had started panicking for whatever reason. So he had headed for his room and that's when he had noticed the the kid was rushing out of the Temple, into the forest. It had intrigued him a bit but he had merely decided not to pay attention to the brat's whims.

And now he was trying to get rid of those two parasites who were harassing him to know where the stupid moyashi had disappeared to.

Lavi sighed.

"Ok, thank you. We'll try to find him by ourselves."

They hurriedly took their leaves as Kanda remained there and gazed towards the forest. He frowned. There was something wrong. Well, not exactly wrong but not right either. Despite the distance between them, he could feel Allen's spiritual energy being released in multiple outbursts. It was almost uncontrolled and for once, he feared that something was about to happen to that stupid brat.

He clicked his tongue, irritated. _'Che, what a pain in the neck!'_ he thought as he hurried into the forest, calling Allen through his energy to find his current location. As he was coming near, he could clearly feel the trouble in the forest due to Allen's irregular emission of energy. Many youkai – and the ones in this area weren't the most harmless – were heading to Allen's location.

"Che, what's that brat thinking?"

Kanda arrived at a clearing and stopped dead at the scene displayed in front of him. Allen was in the middle of the clearing, killing every single youkai which was coming at him; and he wasn't doing his job lightly. He made one explode then turned round to behead another with a spell, then sent another one flying against a tree where it impaled itself on a branch, then turned round again to turn another youkai to dust with another spell, and so on... All the corpses of the youkai were lying all over the place filled with loud growls, screams and shrieks. The white tunic of the silver-haired boy was now coloured with bloodstains from the dead youkai, and some drops had even splashed on his face, but he didn't seem to mind it, too busy slaying every creature in sight. The youkai were no match for Allen.

Kanda couldn't believe his eyes. At first, he thought that for some reason, Allen had gone berserk like in his previous request; however, a closer look at the boy showed him that it wasn't the same kind of loss of control, he was simply... furious. Yes, he was furious against something and taking it out on the poor youkai around him. Still, there was something wrong, for it was the first time Kanda saw Allen in that state. It was a miniature battlefield, with explosions, furious youkai howling then agonizing, the wet sound of blood splashing on the ground, and in the middle, a single boy responsible for the carnage.

In a single and violent detonation, Kanda released his energy, shaking the whole area, and in the next second, everything fell silent; every youkai froze on the spot and started leaving the place slowly, carefully, terrified as Kanda's was walking towards Allen, a powerful and intimidating aura around him. A minute after, the only ones still standing in the clearing – littered with youkai corpses – were Allen and him. Dark blue eyes stared icily at fiery and defiant silver pools, unblinking. None of them moved nor spoke for several seconds until Kanda couldn't contain his exasperation:

"What do you think you were doing, Moyashi?" he asked dryly.

"My name is Allen." the boy replied with the same icy tone. "And I was training. That is, before you interrupted me. And I don't remember calling you here so go back."

"I don't know what game you're playing..." Kanda started dangerously as he grabbed Allen's collar, but the boy slapped his hand away and stepped back.

"Don't touch me." he ordered. "Don't you dare lay your hands on me."

Now Kanda had to admit that the boy's behaviour was strange, but the youkai didn't intend to let himself be ordered around by a mere brat, even if that brat was his master. A smirk appeared on his face.

"That's not what your body was telling me yesterday." Allen stiffened.

"Shut up. Yesterday was a mistake and I'm not going to repeat it."

"Che. So you're still denying it. Stupid brat."

"I said shut up." Allen snapped as he hit Kanda with a strong discharge of energy.

Not expecting it, Kanda took the hit and winced at the pain. He rose his head to Allen, eyes now ablaze with repressed anger. Before he could say anything, the young Exorcist talked again:

"There's something I failed to make you understand right at the beginning, but now I'm going to make it clear: you're nothing else but my shikigami, you're here to serve me and to serve me only. Disobey me and I'll make you regret it."

Kanda's blood was boiling in fury; there was nothing he could do, he knew it, because he wasn't allowed to use his powers to hurt any human, and Allen was perfectly aware of it and taking advantage of it. That damn brat! However, there was something else that intrigued him.

"Say, Moyashi. What has caused you to change into this arrogant brat?"

The only answer he received was a new, stronger discharge of energy that made him step back and put a knee on the ground.

"You damn..."

"Shut up, Kanda. You dare ask me what caused me to change?" Allen walked closer to his shikigami and hit him again with another wave of energy, sending Kanda against the nearest tree. "I'm going to tell you. _You_ caused me to change; and that will be the only thing I'll be grateful to you for. You soiled me with your demonic being. I'm well aware that you managed to do it because I didn't resist, that's why I'm going to get stronger so this won't happen again."

The boy was staring at his shikigami with unusual coldness. The latter wiped off the thin trail of blood at the corner of his mouth then, to Allen's surprise, an eerie smirk slowly appeared on his lips.

"I didn't see you complaining yesterday when I 'soiled' you. To me, you were rather enjoying it." he said, taking his time to savour the look of horror on the boy's face.

"Shut up. You're just a demon who doesn't get how a human mind works at all." Though Allen couldn't stand hearing such words from Kanda, he forced himself not to lose his self-control, even if he knew perfectly how true those words were. Yes, he had felt pleasure, but it was the way Kanda had made it happen that he couldn't forgive. It was the way he had rushed things, upsetting Allen's unclear feelings for him that he couldn't accept.

"You're an idiot. As long as your mind is messed up like this, there's no way you'll get any stronger." Kanda went on, standing up.

"Don't speak as if you knew how I feel. My mind isn't as messed up as you like to believe." the boy merely replied as his hands formed a seal. Ropes of light appeared and wrapped themselves around Kanda, sending him against the trunk of a tree. The youkai hissed, but his smirk didn't leave his lips.

"Che. Among all the nine Exorcists, you're the first one to be such a pain. If I had known that humans react like this after coupling with a demon, I'd have refrained."

Allen couldn't believe his ears. That demon was making fun of him! And talking so casually about "coupling" with him... It made him want to throw up again, but he definitely couldn't show Kanda any sign of weakness, therefore he took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down, more or less successfully.

"And let me tell you something else, Moyashi." In less than a second, the ropes binding Kanda smashed into smithereens and vanished, then he walked to the stunned Exorcist while speaking: "Your level is nowhere near mine. Don't think too highly of yourself simply because you managed to kill some weaklings a few minutes ago. You're centuries too early if you think you can make me submit to you with that chaotic mind of yours."

"That's what you think." Allen replied as he attacked Kanda again, but the latter didn't even flinch.

"And I'm telling you it's useless. Your messed up mind is weakening you, stupid brat." Kanda replied with contempt, still walking towards the boy. "Your supposed strength is nothing but a façade."

"Shut up." Allen sent a new discharge of energy, though frustration could now be read on his face. "I told you my mind is not as messed up as you think it is."

"See? Your attacks have no more effect on me." Kanda provoked him, though inside of him, he was pretty surprised by the boy's coolness. He had expected him to shout or to get desperate by the uselessness of his attacks; however, it seemed that Allen had changed in a way that made him look more confident, or at least, more thoughtful. "Come on, you'll have to do better than that." Kanda added.

Allen gritted his teeth. Another discharge.

"You're just a spoiled brat who doesn't even know what he wants."

The said brat didn't pay attention to those empty words. Another discharge. He'd keep on trying until Kanda flinched, or until his energy failed him. Which was the most probable outcome given how much he had already used before Kanda came, and it didn't go unnoticed by the youkai.

"You're wasting your energy. Stop this childish behaviour already."

In front of him, Allen was now panting heavily, exhausted because of the overuse of his energy, yet his eyes were still showing a rare determination. Kanda sighed.

"Just stop it. You can barely stand on your legs." The youkai was actually wondering how come the boy was still able to stand after using up that much spiritual energy; however, the next second, Allen fell on the ground and passed out, drained of his strength.

"Stupid brat. I warned you." Kanda said as he walked towards the boy and picked him up. Then, as he started heading back to the Temple, he felt several energies approaching and a few seconds after, both Lavi and Lenalee appeared from the middle of the trees, riding their shikigami.

"Allen-kun!"

"Allen! So here he was!"

Lavi jumped off his fox-like shikigami and ran to Kanda who was still carrying Allen in his arms, followed by Lenalee, visibly very worried. Then, seeing all the blood on the boy's robe, the male Exorcist asked Kanda:

"What happened? We felt a huge release of energy in the forest so Komui sent us here, but what the hell happened?"

Kanda merely shrugged and replied as if it was the least of his concerns:

"Training."

"Wha-" Lavi started, but was interrupted by Lenalee who was pointing a trembling finger in front of her.

"Lavi... look at that..."

The redhead turned his gaze to where she was pointing, and his eyes widened at the sight of the clearing strewn with countless corpses of youkai.

"What the heck is..."

"I told you it was training." Kanda cut him dryly. "Now you might as well be a bit useful and clean the mess that stupid brat left behind him. I'm bringing him back." he added as he resumed walking, leaving two speechless Exorcists behind him.

"Hey! You can't simply leave like that!" Lavi addressed the youkai who wasn't listening any more, but Lenalee put a hand on his shoulder and shook her head.

"It's fine, Lavi. Let's clean this up first. We'll have plenty of time to ask for more details later. Kanda's already taking care of Allen-kun." she tried to sound reassuring, but her voice was slightly trembling as she couldn't help but imagine Allen having to fight against all those youkai.

"All right." Lavi replied with a sigh. "Nishiko, you deal with all the corpses, please."

* * *

Meanwhile, somewhere in the forest, a youkai with long and ebony hair was walking, a boy snuggled against his chest and sleeping, exhausted. Kanda laid his dark eyes on the pale face stained with drops of blood – youkai blood – and wiped them off with his thumb. That brat was troubling him more than what he wanted to admit; for sure, not so long ago, he'd have simply let the boy lie on the ground and walked away. Now however, he couldn't bring himself to act indifferent though he didn't know why he couldn't. He had never deigned consider any human worthy of his attention, and had never planned to; yet, a mere brat was threatening to make him break the rule. And Kanda had been living for long enough – unlike those humans – to learn not to deny any of his feelings, even the least pleasant ones. And right now, what he was feeling was an unexplainable attraction for the boy.

The youkai suddenly winced as pain seized him. Nothing unbearable, but unpleasant enough for Kanda to swear before letting a smirk appear on his lips:

"Damn kid. He's actually improving." Well, he had received several blow of pure energy head-on, after all; and even though the brat was still far from hurting him seriously, it didn't mean the attacks hadn't had any effect on Kanda. The youkai kept on walking, ignoring the fading pain and raised an eyebrow when he heard Allen mumble something. And despite the boy's face was half-buried in his shikigami's kimono, Kanda clearly heard the words that escaped his lips like a whisper:

"I'm sorry, Kanda."

The youkai froze for a second, too stunned to believe that the brat had actually apologized to him. He was about to reply when he noticed that Allen was actually still sleeping. And then, for the second time of his long life, a faint – very faint – smile replaced his usual smirk.

"Che."

-----------------------------------------------------------  
So, what do you think? I'm trying to make Allen grow a bit, I hope you managed to see it (somehow) in this chapter. Otherwise it'll be more obvious in the next chapters. I also hope that you'll like the new character I've introduced here; he will be the only OC in this story I think, since I know many people don't like OC much (I usually don't like them much as well...)  
Don't hesitate to tell me if you see something wrong, as usual. Criticisms can only make me improve :D


	13. Encounter

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

* * *

**Chapter 13 - Encounter  
**

Allen woke in the hospital room – again. He had spent the whole afternoon in that room to recover but when the doctor had told him that he was in good shape enough to leave, the boy had asked him to let him stay for the night as well, under the pretext that he was still tired.

Actually, the main reason for Allen's request was that he hadn't wanted to take the risk of spending the night alone with his shikigami. The memory of what they had done was still vivid; and he needed time to put some order in his troubled mind. Moreover, he didn't want to meet with Kanda right away, as he was feeling very uneasy whenever he thought of the youkai. Especially after their little 'argument' in the forest. Allen felt a bit guilty for attacking his own shikigami – damn, he had even dreamt that he had apologized to him! Still, a part of him was telling him that Kanda had deserved it – even if the boy had ended up fainting. Allen sighed. His endurance needed to be seriously trained.

And then, there was his first priority: to defeat the Earl. And in order to achieve that goal, he had to train to get stronger. Strong enough to prevent hundreds of people from getting killed again, and strong enough to stop relying on Kanda all the time.

"Ah! You're awake, young boy."

Allen turned his head on the side and saw the doctor who was smiling at him.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked.

"Yes, thank you. I think I'm well enough to leave."

"Very well. Anyway, I told your superior Komui not to assign you any request for the next five days. After using that much energy, you need to rest properly so you can fully recover."

"Five days? I can't do anything for five days?" Allen asked, surprised.

"Yes. Exerting yourself too much isn't good for your body and mind."

"But I need to train." the boy protested stubbornly, standing up on his futon.

"If it's the same kind of training that brought you here, then the answer is clearly 'no'." the doctor replied firmly. "You need to rest."

"But..."

"Resting is also part of training, young boy. Listen, It's no use wasting your energy thoughtlessly on killing hundreds of youkai if you can't control the emotions that led you to kill them. Because that's what you did yesterday, am I wrong?"

At the question, Allen looked away, silent.

"Whether you did it out of anger, frustration or on simple whim, I don't care." the doctor went on. "Now if you want to improve, know that you won't manage if your mind isn't fully under your control."

Allen nodded, though reluctantly. Those words were so similar to Kanda's.

"Fine. Now I strictly forbid you to use your energy on any exorcism for the next five days, but instead, I want you to rest properly, to put some order in your mind so your energy can run smoothly in you again. Understood?"

"Yes." Allen merely replied before bowing and leaving.

The weather was fine outside, and the temperature was bearable. The atmosphere in the Temple was rather cheerful because of the Festival of the Emperor coming soon. Now Allen had to find a place where he could meditate peacefully, and the first answer that came to him was of course the garden. _'But Kanda is going to come and annoy me for sure.'_ Where was his shikigami by the way? In the vicinity, since Allen could feel him, but he refused to call him. Well, if Kanda was going to show his face, that would be a good training for Allen to try his self-control. So the young Exorcist headed for the garden, sat at his favourite spot and closed his eyes.

Except for the fresh breeze blowing in the trees, the birds twitting, water flowing and some rare voices of people, everything around him was peaceful, almost silent, and for the first time in days, Allen felt soothed by the reassuring atmosphere. He allowed himself to empty his mind of all worries and preoccupations, only focusing on getting some harmony in his troubled spiritual energy. Undeniably, his whole being felt more serene as minutes, then hours passed, and it made Allen realize how much rest he had lacked.

He had no idea how long he remained there, unaware of his surrounding, but when he opened his eyes, the sky had darkened and the boy suddenly felt terribly hungry. Emptying his mind was necessary, but so was filling his stomach. Therefore, he stood up, stretched himself and headed for the kitchen. On his way, a voice called him:

"Allen-kun!"

The boy turned round, and greeted his two friends with a smile.

"Hey Allen!" Lavi said as he patted the boy's shoulder. "So you're finally done meditating or whatever that was?"

"We didn't dare disturb you, even after several hours." Lenalee said with a large smile. "Because you looked so... content and peaceful that we didn't dare do anything."

"Ah... really?" Allen replied, slightly embarrassed. "Well, the doctor told me to rest, so that's what I did. Anyway, let's go eat." he added as he walked to the kitchen, followed by the two other Exorcists.

That day of meditation had been particularly relaxing for Allen. Therefore, he repeated it the next five days and surprisingly enough, Kanda didn't appear at all though the boy kept feeling his energy somewhere not too far away, like a constant presence around him.

* * *

The streets of the city were overcrowded with people from all over the country and even overseas, yet there was very little noise on that first night of the Festival of the Emperor; the Ritual of Purification was about to begin and everyone had to wait until the ceremony was over before starting the festivities. Thus, for now, the illuminated city was quiet and each pair of eyes was turned towards the Palace, though only a minority of people would be able to have a good view of the procession that was going to defile from the Palace to the main shrine, which was located at the end of the main road that crossed the city. Of course, hundreds of imperial guards were in charge of making sure that the Ritual would occur with no hindrance.

Allen, as well as the other Exorcists – except Miranda and Marie – were standing at the bottom of the stone staircase that led to the Shrine, also waiting for the ceremony to begin. From his spot, he could see a part of the crowd despite the darkness of the night thanks to the hundreds lanterns that were lighting the area; children, adults, rich and poor people were all present for that essential Festival. He knew that all over the city, there were also countless youkai which were waiting for the event, though most of them chose to remain hidden.

The Ritual had to be held every year to pray the gods – protectors of this land – so they kept harmony and balance between humans and youkai, which was necessary because youkai were by nature more powerful than humans; that's why some people were blessed with the talent of exorcising and subdue them. And right now Allen could feel a pure, positive aura radiating from the Shrine, place of all blessings. The magic impregnating the whole land was going to be renewed in a yearly cycle in which the Shrine was the beginning and the end. That was the power of the Ritual of Purification.

Next to Allen were standing Lavi, Lenalee and their shikigami. All the Exorcists had summoned their shikigami by their sides to attend the Ritual, all but Allen since he didn't know where Kanda was and hadn't felt like calling him, which had intrigued his friends but the boy had merely shrugged and stated that Kanda was somewhere around anyway, which was true.

Finally, after what seemed to be an endless wait, the sound of a gong rose, announcing the beginning of the Ritual. The entrance gates of the palace slowly opened, letting two columns of priestesses dressed in their usual red and white costumes walk out; each of them was holding a lantern in a hand. Coming right after them were a dozen of female singers dressed in light green kimonos, who were chanting in a loud and clear voice as they were following the priestesses. Behind them, forty guards holding a lantern in one hand and a spear in the other were escorting the Emperor who, for that particular ceremony, was walking instead of using a sedan. His face was hidden behind a veil but most people among those who were able to see him were busier admiring his ceremony costume made of several layers of red, yellow and green silk and embroidered with countless golden flowers of all kind. In his hands, a box made of ebony.

Behind the Emperor and his escort were Miranda and Marie, both dressed in red and black costumes; each of them were carrying a plate of food as an offering for the gods. The priests of the imperial palace closed the procession, some holding lanterns while the others were carrying more plates of offerings.

The long procession was slowly moving towards the Shrine while the population watched devotedly, listening to the singers' sublime voices. Though it wasn't the first time Allen attended the Ritual, he couldn't help but look in admiration as the solemn procession walked past him and climbed up the stone staircase leading to the altar. Next to him, he could also feel that Lavi and Lenalee and all the other Exorcists as well as their shikigami were as captivated as him.

The guards had stopped downstairs and stepped aside. When the priestesses arrived in front of the altar, they burnt dozens sticks of incense while the singers quickly left the shrine to leave room to the Emperor who put the box on the altar. Behind him, the two Exorcists and the priests did the same with the offerings.

Long prayers started, though Allen had to admit it was the part of the Ritual that bored him the most, and he usually tended to lose focus and let his mind wander elsewhere. That's why he didn't notice Kanda silently approaching him from behind and he jumped when a hand grabbed his shoulder. He was about to turn round but Kanda leant over his shoulder, making Allen shudder as he felt Kanda's lips next to his ear; however, the words his shikigami whispered quickly erased any intention from Allen to snap at him:

"Some of the Earl's underlings have come. They suppressed part of their energies but there's no doubt it's them."

Allen gasped.

"Where are they?" he asked as quietly as possible, his eyes still gazing towards the ceremony.

"Not far from here, but they've been here for quite some time now and they still haven't done anything."

"What does it mean?"

"How the hell would I know? Anyway, as soon as they release their energies I'll get them. You'll come with me."

"Why would I?" Allen asked, slightly annoyed.

"Because I can't live you alone, stupid moyashi."

"I can take care of myself!" the boy answered, still in a low voice though irritation could clearly be heard in it.

"I'd like to see that." Kanda sneered.

Allen was about to talk back, but he decided this wouldn't be the best place to start an argument, and he didn't feel like arguing anyway. So he simply shrugged and directed all his attention at the ceremony. Lenalee had noticed the conversation though she didn't hear anything, but as she looked at Allen questioningly while tugging his sleeve, the boy merely smiled and shook his head.

The prayers were now done and Miranda and Marie were standing in front of the altar and preparing to purify the place of any trace of evil energy. Allen couldn't see properly but he was almost certain that the poor Miranda was stressed to no end, for fear of doing something wrong. However, everything went well and, the purification being done, both Exorcists stepped aside to leave room to the Emperor who opened the ebony box, took the pieces of paper out and put them in a silver plate. The scriptures on them were prayers to the gods to renew the balance between humans and youkai, they were the most important prayers of all the Ritual, that's why it was the Emperor's duty to act as the messenger between the gods and the creatures of the earth. He faced the population that was watching him from the streets, the silver plate in his hand, then took the lamp one of the priest was handing him and set the papers on fire. The smoke rose in the sky, conveying the prayers to the gods.

Allen could have sworn he had seen a red light flash for less than a second, but it was very probable that he was imagining things as none of his friends seemed to have noticed it.

The sound of a gong rose again and the whole population lost itself in applause and loud cries of joy. It was the signal for the end of the Ritual and the beginning of three days of festivities. However, Allen wasn't really in the mood for having fun because of the news his shikigami had brought back.

"Allen? You really don't want to come with us?" Lavi interrupted the boy's thoughts.

"Huh? Oh, no, thanks Lavi." he replied with a smile. "I'm going back to the Temple."

"Fine, fine." Lavi pouted exaggeratedly.

"We'll bring you a souvenir back!" Lenalee added.

"Sure! Well, have fun!" Allen said, waving at his friends as they left.

Then he turned to Kanda who was still standing behind him, but the youkai spoke before he had time to say anything:

"They left. Except one." Those words made the boy sigh.

"Should we go and meet that one?" he asked.

"It could be a trap."

"Fine, then let's go back to the Temple." Allen replied dryly, expecting Kanda to tell him it was a stupid idea. Yet, to his greatest surprise, the black-haired youkai merely nodded and followed him.

There was no one on their way back since most people were enjoying themselves in the streets of the city. Allen was feeling very uneasy walking alone next to Kanda in complete silence, with only the full moon to lighten the path. He couldn't help but remember _that_ night and, every time he did, red would colour his cheeks in spite of himself. The heavy silence was beginning to get unbearable, thus Allen decided to react:

"Hm, Kanda. I... I'd like to apologize for attacking you when we were in the forest."

"Che. You already did." Kanda merely replied.

He did? Allen frowned. So it wasn't a dream? Oh well... Silence fell on them again as they kept walking without another word for several minutes.

"Why don't you go to the Festival?" Kanda suddenly asked, breaking the silence. Allen glanced at his shikigami with suspicion. Since when did Kanda care about such things?

"I don't like it when it's too crowded, and I don't like noise." he replied.

"So what do you plan to do to kill time tonight, since you'll probably be all alone?" Kanda asked with a strangely suggestive tone, which didn't go unnoticed by Allen who stiffened a bit.

"Wh-what kind of question is that?"

"Just thought you'd like to do something more interesting than sleeping." his shikigami replied with a smirk on his lips.

At those words, Allen stopped on the spot, imitated right after by Kanda who was clearly expecting the boy to snap. However, the young Exorcist merely lowered his head, silver locks of hair partly hiding his face, and sighed in resignation. Then he spoke, though carefully:

"Kanda... about that... I want to make things clear." Though Kanda couldn't see the boy's expression, his serious tone was enough to intrigue the youkai. Since when did the brat stop acting bratty? His eyes were now locked on Allen, who was biting his lip in search for words.

"What?" he asked impatiently.

"What am I to you?" came the blunt question. Blunt enough to startle Kanda for a few seconds before he regained his composure.

"What do you mean?" he asked dryly.

Allen raised his silver eyes to Kanda, and the latter could read all the will the boy had to pull to be able to face him without that usual lack of assurance.

"What you did on that night, was it a mere game to you? To annoy me? For your own pleasure?" There. He had managed to ask the question. And now, he almost dreaded the answer even if he was prepared for the worst.

During several seconds, Kanda merely stared at Allen, silently. Conflict in his mind. He wanted to give the boy a cruel answer, out of habit, to break that semblance of composure and see him lose himself into dismay and powerlessness; yet the thought of it was disturbing him, seeing the seriousness on that young face was preventing him from acting like his usual self. For the first time, he found himself unable to treat the boy like a mere weak human. What was wrong with him? How could a simple question like that put him in so much trouble? But what could he possibly answer? That he had slept with the boy because he found him interesting? Was that even an answer?

"Kanda?" Allen called him, a bit uncertain as he was gazing at the motionless youkai.

"I did it because I felt like it. Don't ask me any further." Kanda replied curtly.

At those words, Allen lowered his eyes, but he didn't flinch at the harshness of the tone. At least Kanda hadn't said he considered him a mere tool to entertain him. Unconsciously, his heartbeat increased as he replied:

"Kanda, I'll ask you not to do it again. It happened... too quickly. I... actually I... don't hate you for what you've done, but you have to understand that I need time." Allen was playing nervously with his sleeve, surprised by his own words that were coming out from his mouth. "Humans need time." he added, almost as an excuse.

"Che. You say humans need time, but your life span doesn't allow you to get that time." Kanda said.

"It doesn't mean that we don't need it. So I'm asking you – no, it's an order: don't do it again."

"And what makes you think I'll obey your order?" the shikigami retorted.

"Nothing. Except the fact that you're my shikigami." Allen replied equally.

Kanda looked at the boy with disbelief. Was that brat stupid or something? As if such an excuse could work on him! Yet, he had to acknowledge the boy's guts for not giving up or acting like a chicken. That's why he gave his reply without any further thought:

"Fine."

And then, at that precise moment, a faint smile appeared on Allen's lips.

"Thanks."

Not knowing what else to say, he merely added: "Let's go back now."

As he was about to resume walking, he felt a hand grabbing his wrist and turned round to see Kanda staring straight in his eyes. The youkai's expression was undecipherable, neither cold nor warm, it was like he was struggling with himself for whatever reason. Allen looked at him questioningly.

"What..." he started.

"You don't hate me. Why?"

"Well... because... I meant that..." Allen frowned as he looked away. He couldn't find words to explain himself. "I just..." Then he shook his head. "Never mind. Let's go back, Kanda." he said as he tried to walk away, embarrassed, but Kanda pulled him back and made the boy face him.

"No. Tell me clearly what you meant."

Allen was visibly eager to be done with the conversation. Actually, he was wondering why Kanda had become so talkative and why he was inquiring about those 'details'. Or at least, Allen was sure that Kanda considered his opinion about the youkai to be a detail. In any case, Kanda's gaze on him was getting disconcerting for the boy, and in the end, he didn't find any other solution to avoid that gaze but to lean his forehead against his shikigami's chest, to the latter's surprise.

"I just meant what I said." came the mere whisper. "Don't ask me any further, Kanda, because I would be unable to answer you."

Neither of them moved for a moment, until Kanda used his free hand – the one that wasn't holding Allen's wrist – to reach the boy's chin, and lifted it.

Silver eyes were captured by dark blue ones, slender body slowly pressing against a warm chest, heart racing, a pair of slightly hesitating lips reaching up to immobile ones, faces only an inch apart. Then a finger lay on those soft lips and, as an answer to questioning silver eyes, a few words were whispered:

"Not now, Moyashi. We have a visitor."

Kanda freed Allen's wrist and pushed him on his side, glancing around him. It took the boy a few seconds to come back to reality and sense an energy that did not reassure him at all. He lifted his barriers.

"Come out." Kanda ordered sharply.

A black cat came from behind a small rock on the side of the path and, under Allen's widened eyes, turned into an elegant woman dressed in a plain dark green kimono. Her long, blonde hair contrasted with her dark grey skin and she was bearing the same scars as Tyki, Road and Jasdevi on her forehead. Allen's blood started boiling in spite of himself.

"Lulubell." Kanda said darkly.

"I am only here to deliver a message from the Earl." the said Lulubell declared, her voice emotionless. "These are the Earl's words: 'Kanda, you dear scum, your mere existence is an eyesore to me. I haven't forgotten how blood-drenched your hands are, nor the fact that some of this blood come from my kin and from your own kin. Your existence will be erased by my hand, be certain of it.'"

"These were the same words that bastard told me the last time we met, and I'm still here." Kanda sneered.

"I wasn't done talking. Here is the end of his message: 'This land is corrupted by humans. Youkai who serve under them are traitors; however, I will save them from that enslavement and give the land back to us youkai. I will make an exception for you, who only deserve to be removed from this world. Humans need to be reminded that they have no power over us. It starts tonight.'" She paused a second before going on: "Do you wish to give him an answer?" she asked.

"I'll give him your corpse as an answer." Kanda said sharply as he readied to attack her.

However, the one who attacked first was neither of them. It was Allen, who released a blast towards Lulubell's direction. She dodged, though barely.

"I'm afraid the conversation will have to end here then." the female youkai replied quietly. She turned into a bat, but as she was about to fly away, a luminous cube appeared and enclosed her inside. She made an attempt at escaping, but hit against the transparent walls of the cage.

"You're not going anywhere."

Kanda turned his head to Allen, who had pronounced those last words with an unusually icy tone. The shikigami frowned. During a second, he felt a energy coming out from Allen, but which wasn't the boy's energy. It triggered something in Kanda's memory and he tried to remember where he had already felt that energy before but almost immediately gave up as it wasn't the best moment to lose focus on the current situation.

Allen's soft traits had left room to a cold expression, and again, it seemed that his eyes were glittering with a desire to slaughter. His whole body was trembling of pure excitement at the perspective of killing and the amount of released energy was increasing crazily, making Kanda open his eyes wide. The damn brat was going berserk again! And before he had time to react, Allen made the cube explode.

Heavy smoke was partly hiding the scene in front of them, but the sound of someone coughing could be heard. As the smoke slowly dispersed, the lying body of Lulubell – who had turned back into a woman – could be seen on the path. The youkai was injured, though not too badly, but she was losing blood from several wounds all over her body.

"You little..." she started, but Allen didn't give her time to continue as he landed another blow on her, sending her flying a few meters away.

"Oi, Moyashi! Stop this immediately!" Kanda ordered the boy as he rushed to him to stop him.

"I have to kill her." Allen replied coldly as he slapped Kanda's hand away. "Do not interfere."

"You're not yourself! Just come back to normal already!"

"I have to kill her. Get out of my way or I'll kill you too."

That was nonsense. There wasn't anyone to protect here, so why was the brat releasing so much energy again? Kanda cursed under his breath. He couldn't understand. The kid was supposed to be good for something only when his friends' lives were threatened! Then again, he wasn't going to complain since Lulubell was now injured; Kanda could simply finish her off, but his priority right now was the moyashi. Allen was shaking, fists clenched, panting heavily, visibly trying not to let his energy explode again. So Kanda seized his shoulder and poured his own energy in like he had done the first time Allen had lost control. As expected, the boy slowly calmed down, and his breath progressively came back to normal.

"Th-thanks, Kanda." he said hesitantly.

"Che, we'll talk about it later. You stay here." the youkai replied as he summoned his katana and walked towards Lulubell. However, he froze midway as he felt a new energy coming to him. No, not a new one. It wasn't the same energy he had felt in Allen, though. This one was familiar, and he had no difficulty identifying it though it had been a long time since he had last felt it. _'Impossible!' _That energy was... but it couldn't be!

A large shadow flew past him and landed between him and Lulubell. A brown cloak was wrapped around the newcomer whose face was lit by the moon, and Allen gasped as he saw it. He blinked several times to make sure he wasn't hallucinating, but no, there was no possible mistake; that long and black hair, that handsome face, that typical arrogant smirk on those lips...

"Kan-Kanda?" he asked hesitantly, but neither Kanda nor the newcomer heard him, too busy glaring at one another. To Allen, it was as if his shikigami was facing his double. Or his twin. The only difference was that the stranger had his hair tied in a long ponytail, unlike Kanda. Even their energies were similar, and Allen could hardly distinguish the faint difference between them. And their level of power was comparable.

Kanda was clutching Mugen's hilt so hard his knuckles were white, while his dark eyes were locked on the new youkai with obvious disbelief.

"You... how is that possible... what's the meaning of this?" he articulated, his voice dangerously threatening.

The smirk on the other's lips widened.

"Is that how you greet me after so many centuries?" the youkai asked. Then, glancing at Allen, he added: "Oh, so that's your new master. Poor boy, he looks terrorized. Kanda, you're pitiful as always."

"Shut up. What are you doing here?" Kanda snapped back, his whole body trembling out of fury.

"Look at you. You are cursed and doomed to serve a human. A human!" the youkai laughed. "You're a failure."

"Just shut up!" Kanda shouted as he charged on the youkai which dodged easily.

"Oh? So you want to fight me? Well, I merely came to take Lulubell back and say hello to you, so don't waste your time. Hey, Lulubell, you're ok?" he addressed the female youkai.

"Y-yes. But we have to leave right away." she replied, panting.

"Don't ignore me!" Kanda rushed towards his double again.

Allen could only watch the two demons, terrified by the presence of such powerful creatures in a same place. He saw Kanda's opponent holding out his hand in front of him, exactly like Kanda when he wanted to summon Mugen, though the name he called wasn't Mugen:

"Eien." the youkai called. A katana, similar in all points to Kanda's, appeared in his palm. "Come, Kanda. I'll be done with you in less than a minute."

"Don't get so cocky!" Kanda replied fiercely.

Blades clashed violently, the sound of metal against metal was ringing in Allen's ears as the two demons attacked each other tirelessly. It was on a whole different level compared with the fight between Kanda and the wolf-demon, Jasdevi. This time, Allen couldn't tell who was stronger than the other, and fear seized him. What if Kanda was defeated? To the boy, it had never crossed his mind that his shikigami could be second to anyone; however, now, the image he had of Kanda was being shaken by the fight he was witnessing. Not that Kanda was having a hard time dealing with his opponent, but it was the first time Allen could see his shikigami in such a state of rage, it was the first time he looked so determined to eliminate an enemy. Just who was that youkai that was a perfect copy of Kanda and could make him lose his cool to that extent?

The two demons were now panting, facing each other in fighting stances, katana ready to slash.

"I have to admit you improved a bit, Kanda." the youkai said between two pants.

"Shut up. This time I'm going to kill you for real and make sure you won't ever come back."

"That time back then was pure luck."

"You bastard! I'll show you if it was luck!" Kanda's whole being was filled with a single will: to erase his opponent from this world. He charged again, and the other youkai parried.

"Kanda, I'd love to play with you a bit longer, but right now my first priority is to bring Lulubell back otherwise the Earl will be displeased."

At those words, Kanda's eyes widened.

"The Earl? You work for that piece of trash?" he asked, voice trembling out of anger.

"I have no time to tell you the details. We must retreat now." the youkai said calmly as he leapt backwards, landed next to Lulubell, picked her up and vanished. In a split second.

"Kanrou!!!" Kanda yelled, out of control. With a cry of rage, he violently plunged Mugen's blade in the ground, which cracked under the shock, creating a long fissure on the road. He stood there, his breathing uneven, blood boiling and making his whole body shake under the intensity of his fury. Then an uncertain voice called him, reminding him that he wasn't alone:

"Kanda?"

He turned round, to see the silver-haired boy walking to him, face painted with worry. Allen stopped a few steps away from Kanda, not knowing how his shikigami could react if he came too close. But the latter merely shut his eyes, took a deep breath and exhaled in an attempt at cooling himself down. Then he opened his eyes and looked at the boy in front of him. Worried. The stupid brat was worried. Because of him.

"Who was that?" Allen asked carefully.

"None of your business. Let's go back." Kanda replied dryly as he was already walking back, but a grip on his sleeve stopped him.

"Please, tell me who that youkai was." the boy's tone was filled with concern. "Kanda, I've never seen you so... I mean, you weren't your usual self and..."

"What do you actually know of my usual self?" Kanda cut the boy sharply. The question took Allen off guard. What did he know? Well... nothing consistent, to be honest. But that wasn't the point.

"I want you to stop saying it's none of my business. As long as it concerns you, it concerns me, because you're my shikigami." the boy said stubbornly.

Kanda looked at the boy who was still gripping his arm and waiting for him to answer. He sighed. That would be the second time he yielded to the boy, in a single night.

"That was my twin brother."

"Your brother? But why were you trying to kill each other?" Allen asked.

"Listen, I'm not in the mood to talk about this. More importantly, _you_ tell me what the hell happened to you earlier."

"What do you m-Oh. That." The boy frowned, as if trying to remember what had happened exactly. "I don't know. I suddenly felt a terrible urge to kill her, though I don't understand why. But Kanda, don't change the topic. We were talking about your brother."

"No we weren't." Kanda replied, annoyed. "The priority right now is for you to put your damn energy under control. I don't want to spend my time repressing it for you."

"I told you I don't understand! I've been training for the past few days to regulate the flow of my energy, but as soon as I felt Lulubell's, something clicked in me and... I don't know, it was as if I was coerced into killing her. But tell me about your bro-"

"I said it's none of your damn business!" Kanda snapped, making the boy jump slightly. "Your business is to train so you-"

"Kanda! You're hopeless!" Allen cut him, exasperated. "Can't you forget about my energy for once and tell me why your own brother tried to kill you!"

The second after, the boy gasped as Kanda grabbed him by the collar and pulled him closer. There was nothing gentle in the dark blue eyes which were now glaring icily at Allen, making the boy shiver, and he gulped at Kanda's harsh tone as he spat his words like venom:

"I said. It's none. Of your business." he said before releasing Allen abruptly, making the boy lose his balance and almost fall. Then the youkai grabbed Mugen which was still stuck in the ground, dismissed it and started walking away but stopped after a few steps.

"And don't you dare speak about what happened tonight to anyone. This is my own personal problem."

And without any other word, he resumed walking, leaving a dumbstruck Allen behind him.

The boy's mind was utterly confused. How did it end like that? Not that long ago, he and his shikigami were almost having a civilized conversation – damn, he had even been about to _kiss_ Kanda again! The thought made him blush, but he quickly dismissed it. And now, now... Why did Kanda had to make things more complicated than they already were? Why did he always have to act all high and mighty while he considered the boy to be a hindrance?

Allen gripped his chest and shook his head. For a moment, he had thought their relationship was improving, but it seemed that their respective nature – a human and a demon – was a natural barrier between them, and would always be.

Fine. If things were going to be that way, then there was nothing he could do. At least for now. He was about to go back to the Temple, when another idea came to him. He wanted to lighten his mood a bit.

Tonight, he'd enjoy the Festival of the Emperor.

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'Eien' stands for 'eternity', I thought it'd match Mugen since it can mean 'infinity'. Anyway, exams are soon and teachers are harsh. So updates will be done more slowly.  
Thanks to all of you who read this, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	14. Little by little

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property. And I wish she made Yullen canon... because chapter 188 sooo calls for Yullen. I mean, Allen saving and comforting Kanda would be natural, right?

* * *

**Chapter 14 - Little by little  
**

The more Allen was strolling – with difficulty – in the lively and crowded streets of the capital city, the more he regretted coming there. The sky was pitch black above him but the festivities were in full swing, the boy had trouble avoiding bumping into people and the noise around him was threatening to give him a powerful headache. At first, he had come to the Festival to lighten his confused mind, and hearing all the cheerful voices around him as well as watching various artists sing, juggle, spit fire and exhibit many other skills had entertained him a bit. He had even been offered dumplings and sake, though he refused the latter.

But then, he started seeing drunk people yelling obscenities while scaring young ladies, men fighting after gambling, and even kids stealing purses of careless people. At the corner of a narrow street, a man was throwing up abundantly next to a person – Allen failed at identifying the gender – who was lying on the dirty ground, probably too drunk to stand. And there was the smell. Smell of countless dishes prepared by travelling sellers mixed with emanation of alcohol and odours of rubbish dumped on the streets were filling the air; it made Allen sick. And it was only the first night. The boy didn't dare imagine the state of the city three days later.

Since it was the first time Allen attended the Festival, he was clearly shocked when he realized that the party wasn't exactly how he had imagined it to be. How could Lavi and Lenalee stand all that... debauchery? The imperial guards were there to keep order, or at least they were supposed to, for Allen noticed with clear disapproval that most of them were holding either a bottle of sake, or a woman, or both. The silver-haired boy hurried to the main thoroughfare, hoping that it'd be more... respectable.

However, on his way there, his attention was caught by something moving furtively on the roofs. He stopped, trying to catch the thing – probably a youkai – with his eyes but a man bumped into him and started insulting him for standing on his way. Allen wrinkled his nose as the man reeked of alcohol – gods, were there only drunkards in the street? – but was about to apologize anyway when the same man let out a cry of pain and the woman – visibly as drunk as the man – who was holding his arm shrieked in surprise.

"What the..." the man started, shaking his leg frantically and almost losing his balance.

As Allen looked down, he saw a lizard about the size of a cat biting the man's leg.

"A youkai is attacking me!" he yelled. Some people turned their gaze to him but quickly walked away, visibly uninterested by such a minor event. The man raised his angry eyes to Allen:

"It's yours, right?" he barked at the boy, still trying to get rid of the youkai. His cheeks were red, but Allen couldn't tell if it was due to alcohol or to fury. "You sent your pitiful shikigami because I bumped into you, right? You son of a..."

"Call it back!" the woman ordered Allen. "Call it back or I swear you're going to pay, you little scum!"

Allen was distraught. He had originally intended to help the man, but now all his will had vanished. Fortunately, there was already so much mess in the streets that not many people noticed the ruckus the man and probably his wife were making.

"It's a wild youkai! I didn't do anything!" Allen replied as he stepped back.

"Liar! You sent it! You're a demon as well!" the woman snapped back, pointing at his white hair.

"I-I..."

"Yeah, you're a demon too! Take that, demon!" the man made an unsuccessful attempt at punching Allen. The boy mentally thanked the wasted state of the man that had prevented him from aiming correctly.

But he couldn't stand it any more, so he did the most logical thing possible: he ran away, bumping into several people but he didn't care. All he wanted was to flee the stifling crowd, the noise hammering his skull, the nauseous and heady smell of alcohol mixed with grilled food, everything. If he had thought that coming to the Festival would help him, he was now realizing how much of a mistake it was. At that moment, he was more willing to face Kanda than going back to the Festival. That's why he ran back to the Temple.

* * *

Kanda hadn't deign follow the brat to the Festival; his mind was busier thinking about the recent events. First, the Earl's words. _'It starts tonight.'_ The black-haired youkai frowned for the hundredth time. He was pretty sure he had felt the Earl's underlings leaving, meaning that he didn't plan any attack on the city tonight, so what was the meaning of those words? Or had the Earl already set a trap somewhere without Kanda noticing? And then, there was Kanrou.

Kanda gritted his teeth. That bastard... how the hell could he be still alive? And working for the Earl? What kind of joke was that? And if he was alive, then did it mean that _they_ were also...? Now things could really get serious. No. They _were going_ to get really serious.

Maybe it hadn't been a good idea to leave the stupid moyashi alone after all. From the garden of the Temple where he was walking, he couldn't feel his spiritual energy because of the distance between them; if any problem were to show up, Kanda didn't know if the brat would be able to call him, even with the energy bond – that's how Kanda named their bond after the 'accident' – that linked them. Strengthening that bond was going to become a priority.

He stopped walking abruptly, annoyed. The kid was such a pain in the neck. As Kanda was going to look for Allen, he felt the familiar energy of his master – no, of the brat who was supposed to be his master. Apparently, he was already tired of the Festival. Well, at least it saved Kanda the trouble of looking for him. He walked to a tree and leant his back against it, sighing. Too much had happened in a single night, and he didn't feel like meeting with the brat yet, for he was certain the boy would harass him with stupid questions about his brother and whatnot.

As soon as Allen left the capital city and took the path that led to the Temple, he filled his lungs with fresh air, savouring the sudden peace surrounding him. A faint smell of food and sake made him look at his clothes and frown. His costume was impregnated with the very unpleasant odour of the city, and so was his own body; a bath in the Temple's hot springs was going to be necessary. He reached the Temple about fifteen minutes later and headed for his room, praying that Kanda wasn't in there. His prayer was granted; he entered the empty room, grabbed a change of clothes and went straight at the hot springs.

The place was surrounded by a wooden palisade and divided in two separate baths, one for men and one for women. The inside was like a miniature forest with several pools of hot water in the middle, and as expected, all of them were empty, to Allen's greatest pleasure. He got rid of his clothes and quickly slipped into the water, immersing himself completely before leaning his back on the pool's edge. A pleased sigh escaped his lips as he closed his eyes and let the hot water relax his muscles. During half an hour, he allowed himself not to think about anything but the pleasant sensation of abandoning his tired body to this invigorating bath. It felt even better than meditating.

Unfortunately, one can't remain in that state of tranquillity for ever and in spite of himself, darker thoughts started coming back to the boy. The encounter with the demon Lulubell, for a start. Now that he thought about it, she had said some rather strange words. Back then he hadn't paid much attention to them because he was too busy trying to keep his energy under control, and also because of Kanda's... twin. All those made a total of three problems which Allen didn't have any clue about how to deal with.

Well, the most urgent was the Earl's matter. Allen forced himself to remember exactly what Lulubell had said, there was something about killing Kanda, freeing all the shikigami and that it was starting now... Allen shook his head. He couldn't grasp any of those, and the mere thought of asking anything to his shikigami discouraged him. The boy sank deeper in the water as his mind drifted to Kanda, his second problem.

Allen couldn't help it. He couldn't help but remember Kanda's lips trailing on his neck, then on his collarbone before going down his chest, the hot breath raising goosebumps all over his body, the silky hair flowing through his trembling fingers, the warm hand running up his leg and caressing his thigh before opening it and... Allen pressed his hands over his mouth, panicked at the pleasure those memories were bringing him. Directly between his legs. And the high temperature of the bath didn't help cool him down at all. Now Allen really wished he could dive in the icy river near the forest. _'Oh gods, oh gods! How am I supposed to deal with this?'_ He wanted to hit himself because of his own body's reaction to thoughts that should have been banned from his mind; at the same time, he wanted to convince himself that it was normal for a boy his age to react like that. _'No, no, no! It's not normal at all to like a demon that way!'_

And of course, as if things weren't bad enough for him, the voice he heard behind him completed his distress:

"Oi, do you plan to drown there?"

"K-Kanda!" Allen gasped, on the verge of a heart attack. He turned round and sank himself in the water so only his head was out, thanking the night for hiding the embarrassment on his face. "What are you doing here?" he asked hastily. Too hastily, in fact. Kanda raised an eyebrow.

"Simply making sure you weren't drowning. What's with that reaction?" Then, before Allen could even reply anything, a smirk appeared on the lips of the youkai. "Oh. So that's the problem." he added as he knelt down at the pool's edge, careful that the long sleeves of his kimono didn't get into the water.

"W-what do you mean?" the boy asked with a hint of worry.

"Che. I can smell your arousal from here." His smirk went wider at the boy's stunned expression.

"My- no! It's not what you think! I-I..." Allen stuttered as he sank a bit deeper into the water.

"You are." Kanda cut him. "I can take care of this for you."

"Certainly not!" the boy shook his head vehemently. It was embarrassing enough like that, he didn't need Kanda to be present! "And I already ordered you not to..."

"You ordered me not to mate with you, and I won't. But I can at least ease you." the youkai cut him. The blunt words made Allen go even redder.

"Stop saying stuff like that! I'm not an animal! And I'm fine. Just leave me." he said, looking away.

"I said I can take care of it for you." Kanda said very seriously.

The tone slightly surprised Allen, who made the mistake of raising his eyes to his shikigami. Kanda's gaze on the boy made his heartbeat speed up, his breathing was getting irregular. And like on _that_ night, he found himself unable to say or do anything but gulp. Kanda wasn't really forcing him, meaning that Allen could refuse if he truly wanted to, but now the mere sight of Kanda's handsome traits lit by the moon was enough to make him even harder and his body was screaming at him to obey the gorgeous and demonic creature that was Kanda.

The youkai rolled the sleeve of his kimono up and held out his arm before lifting Allen's chin from the tip of his fingers, taking his time to gaze – almost greedily – at the not so innocent, youthful face in front of him. Then, with one swift and quick movement, he plunged his arm in the water and grabbed the young Exorcist by the waist before standing up, drawing him out of the pool as if he weighted nothing, and pulled the boy to him so Allen's bare back was pressed against Kanda's chest. Allen barely had time to feel the cold air on him as Kanda wrapped an arm around him, covering him with his long sleeve while his other hand went straight between the boy's legs.

"Kanda!" he gasped, his legs threatening to fail him.

His shikigami didn't reply, more focused on working on Allen who was now panting under the action of Kanda's skilled hand. He gripped tightly at Kanda's arm that was around him, and for the next minute, the only sounds that could be heard in the hot springs were gasps and stifled moans. Pressed against Kanda's warm body, Allen gave in once again to the guilty pleasure his shikigami was offering him. Because it wasn't so bad after all. His arousal kept building up until Kanda finally made him reach his limits and release.

"It felt good, right?" he heard Kanda whisper at his ear. From his tone, Allen was pretty sure the youkai was smirking again. He didn't reply, busy trying to get his breath back and stop the trembling in his legs.

Then Kanda released him from his embrace, picked Allen's clean kimono up and threw it over the boy's shoulders. Shivering, cheeks flushed, Allen slowly put it on and tied his belt, then he turned round to see his shikigami looking at him silently with an expression the boy couldn't decipher.

"Is something the matter?" he asked cautiously. To his surprise, he saw Kanda bit his lip while looking away and frowning. Then the shikigami spoke:

"Let's go back to your room. I'll tell you about Kanrou. And about a few other things." he declared almost reluctantly.

To tell the truth, Allen hadn't expected such an answer, especially after what they had just done. It was as if nothing had happened, and it pretty irritated the boy. Moreover, he was feeling exhausted by all the events of the night and he only wished to get back to his room to collapse on his futon and sleep; however, Kanda's last words managed to catch his full attention. His shikigami was willing to talk to him? That was unprecedented, and Allen was more than inclined to make an effort and remain awake to hear what Kanda had to say. For fear that the latter would change his mind, the boy quickly nodded and picked up his clothes before following Kanda to his room.

* * *

"Woah, Lenalee! Look at these dancers over there!" Lavi exclaimed with excitement as he pointed towards a group of young female dancers dressed beautifully with multicoloured silk robes. Some musicians were playing a cheerful song and many spectators were in awe at the fluid and gracious movements of the dancers.

"Their costumes look so bright! And they are dancing wonderfully well!" the Chinese girl replied with the same enthusiasm. "A pity Allen-kun can't see this!"

"Yeah, next year I'll drag him here by force." Lavi declared with exaggerated authority, which made Lenalee laugh.

"You said the same thing last year. And the year before." she teased him.

"Yeah but next time I'll definitely make him come."

The streets of the city were as lively as ever, and the two friends were having a great time discovering as much artists as possible and tasting as many new dishes as they could find.

"Ouch!" Lavi suddenly grimaced as he felt something bumping into his leg, and as he looked down, he saw a small youkai run past him and jump on a man who was walking by. The youkai scratched the man's face and quickly disappeared in the crowd. The man swore as he held his face while another person was handing him a handkerchief to wipe the few drops of blood off.

"Are you ok?" Lenalee asked worriedly as she hurried to the man who was fortunately not injured that badly. Lavi followed her and examined the scratches.

"It's ok, this will heal in a few days." he said reassuringly.

"I don't care!" the man shouted, visibly very angry. "Why did that youkai attack me? If I see it again, I swear I'll make him regret this!"

"Please, calm down. It's possible that the youkai was scared of something and..." Lenalee tried to explain, but the man interrupted her:

"I don't care! And you, you are Exorcists, right? Why didn't you stop the youkai? It's your job, right? Then do it correctly!" He was waving his arms frantically while shouting at the two Exorcists who were too stunned to reply, but Lavi quickly regained his composure and grabbed the man by the collar:

"Hey. This isn't a way to talk to ladies, you got it?" he said threateningly. "And don't mistake Exorcists for pet-keepers." Then, addressing Lenalee, he added: "Let's go, Lenalee. This guy's gonna spoil the mood."

The girl nodded, more than eager to leave the place, and followed Lavi elsewhere, leaving a fulminating man behind them.

"Seriously, what's wrong with that guy?" Lavi asked, pissed off.

"Well, it's understandable since he was hurt by a youkai." Lenalee made an attempt at explaining.

"Yeah, well that wasn't a reason to yell at us. Anyway, don't you think it's strange that a youkai suddenly appeared out of nowhere and attacked someone like that?"

"Hmm... I don't know, but it's true that a small youkai appearing in the middle of so many people is a rare sight." Lenalee replied pensively. "Anyway, the night is still long, how about we enjoy ourselves instead of thinking about this accident?" she suggested on a more cheerful tone.

"You're right!" Lavi nodded vigorously.

* * *

Allen was sitting on his futon cross-legged, waiting impatiently for Kanda to start talking. His shikigami was facing him eyes closed, sitting in the same position and obviously still struggling against himself to determine whether he actually wanted to tell the brat about his twin. After a long, silent minute, he sighed before opening his eyes:

"I'm warning you: I'm going to tell you the bare minimum, I won't answer any of your questions about further information. Is that clear?"

Allen nodded. Despite the tiredness that was seizing him – it was way past midnight – he forced himself to keep his eyelids open and to focus all his attention on Kanda's words. After another few seconds of silence, Kanda went on:

"Kanrou is my twin brother. He was supposed to be dead. He and a few other demons. I killed all of them over a thousand years ago." He paused, observing the boy's expression, expecting to see him shocked, but Allen merely nodded again. That was an improvement.

"However, the fact that he is alive and working for the Earl worries me. He was not the kind of demon who would agree to work under anyone else's command. But that was a long time ago. Now I need to find out the motives behind his actions. And..." He paused again and looked away, visibly pissed off though Allen couldn't tell why and didn't dare ask. Then Kanda turned his gaze to the boy again and his voice was slightly shaking when he resumed speaking:

"... he's strong. You must have felt it back then, he's not on the same level as the others. And that's why..." Kanda's piercing gaze made Allen's cheeks turn pink. "... you have to get stronger. I'd like to believe the Temple can give you enough protection, but I highly doubt it. And I don't know if I'll be able to protect you as well."

"Why?" Allen immediately inquired, full of concern.

"I told you Kanrou is much stronger than any of the demons you've met so far. I could counter him if I were by myself. But with you around..."

The silver-haired boy couldn't tell whether Kanda was frustrated because he thought of him as a burden or simply because of his brother. Either way, it hurt Allen. And it worried him too. That was the first time he saw Kanda almost _afraid_ of someone. He lowered his head, in search for something to reply, but a hand grabbing his collar and roughly pulling him forward made him gasp, and he found himself facing a pretty upset Kanda, faces uncomfortably close.

"You need to put your damn energy under control." the youkai almost snapped. "You have the potential to be on par with powerful demons such as this bastard Kanrou, that's why I want you to train so you don't go berserk every time you face one of them."

"I know that..." Allen articulated with some difficulty. "Kanda, release me, you're almost choking me." he added. At first surprised, the shikigami slowly loosened his grip on Allen's collar, though he didn't completely let go.

"I promise I'll train harder." the boy went on tiredly. "I'll go see my former teachers to ask them for advice because I think my reaction when I meet with a demon is abnormal."

"It sure is." Kanda sneered, earning him a frown from Allen.

"No, I mean that... I feel as if my losing control is not natural... it feels like it's forced..."

Kanda raised an eyebrow.

"Forced?"

"Yes. The urge to kill I had when I felt Lulubell's energy didn't come from me, I'm pretty sure of it. I can't really explain, but you have to believe me." Allen insisted with almost pleading eyes.

"Whatever. I just want to make sure you'll be able to defend yourself when necessary." Kanda replied dryly.

"I will. I don't want to be a burden for you any more."

The boy's weary tone surprised Kanda who didn't find anything to reply at the moment. So he simply looked at his master who silently lowered his head. Then the boy yawned unwillingly and rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"Che. I guess brats like you shouldn't stay awake so long, after all." Kanda stated with a faint smirk. Allen glared at him, but the demon gently pushed him back: "Just sleep already."

Allen was about to comply, when he suddenly turned his gaze back at Kanda:

"I almost forgot." he merely said before leaning forward to Kanda and pressing his lips against his shikigami's. The latter barely reacted; it was the second time he was being caught off guard by Allen's unexpected action. He didn't push the boy away though, because demon or not, the feeling of soft and warm lips on his was undeniably pleasant. Almost unconsciously, he slipped his tongue between Allen's slightly parted lips and forced them to open more. The boy complied, experiencing the new sensation of having Kanda explore his mouth gently, letting soft moans escape and feeling inwardly pleased that his shikigami could sometimes not act roughly and impulsively.

After what seemed to be ages, Allen slowly pulled back, cheeks reddened and heart pounding against his chest. He didn't dare cross Kanda's gaze.

"Because I didn't get to do it earlier." he murmured.

"Che." was Kanda mere answer. "Don't tempt me or I don't know what I may do to you despite your order. Just go sleep now."

The boy looked surprised at first, then nodded hurriedly. As he watched Allen quickly change into his night clothes and slip under the covers, Kanda couldn't help but run his tongue over his lips, still feeling the boy's taste on them. The damn brat was definitely affecting him too much. And he couldn't tell whether it was a bad thing or not.

* * *

_The man – certainly an Exorcist given his white robe – was sitting on his heels somewhere deep in the forest, alone. He didn't want anyone to know what he was going to do. The grave expression on his face was proof that he had spent countless hours debating with himself in order to decide whether to take action or not, and the final answer he came with was a positive one. He closed his blue eyes and sighed in resignation. It was necessary._

_Six small cups of silver filled with red liquid were aligned in front of him, and next to each cup was lying a paper seal with scriptures on it. The man ran his right hand in his blonde hair before sighing again, then grabbed the knife lying next to him and brought the handle to his mouth. He bit on the handle tightly and with one swift movement of his head, gashed the palm of his right hand, tracing a crimson line on it. Why hadn't he used his left hand to hold the knife? Because he didn't have one. The loose sleeves of his costume couldn't hide the fact that he was missing a whole arm._

_He held out his palm over the first cup and let a few drops fall into it, then over the second cup, then the third, and the fourth... until the last one. Then he plunged each seal in each cup and opened his mouth. He was about to pronounce the incantation but stopped at the last moment._

_It was still time to go back. It was still time to give up and forget about this. The man shook his head. No, he had to do it, for the future's sake. No matter the price. Guilt was written all over his face; it was his fault, yet the one who was going to pay the price wouldn't be him, it would be his descendant. Still, he had to do it._

"_You won't have to worry about your next master repeating the same mistake as me, Kanda." he spoke to himself._

_No further hesitation was displayed in his eyes any more as he uttered the incantation._

Allen woke up with a start. He sat up on his futon, trying to understand what had just happened. A dream. It was a dream. Yet at the exact moment when the man had pronounced the words for the incantation, Allen had felt a violent wave of energy choking him, but the feeling was already fading and the boy decided it had been his imagination. The dream looked so real it was scaring. And what was the meaning of the man's words? Did he really say 'Kanda'? What the hell was Kanda doing in his dream?

Allen shook his head. It was nothing else but a dream. Still, he couldn't help but put a hand on his chest as if the sensation was still there. He wanted to forget about the dream; however something inside of him kept telling him there was something wrong. _'Maybe I should ask Kanda about it.'_ Stupid idea. The youkai would probably make fun of him.

It was at that moment that he noticed the fuss outside his room. It was probably morning already, but most people were supposed to be in the capital enjoying the three days of the Festival, so what was causing all that noise? To his surprise, he managed to recognize Lenalee's agitated voice; the girl was talking with several other people though the boy couldn't identify who since they were all talking at the same. Given their tones, something wrong had happened.

Allen quickly got up and put on his Exorcist costume before sliding the panel of his room open. Not far away, a small group of people was standing in the middle of the alley, and surprisingly enough, Kanda was one of them. Allen suddenly felt very hot at the sight of shikigami, but his thoughts were quickly distracted as one of the present people waved at Allen:

"Allen! Come here!" Lavi called.

The other people, namely Lenalee, Komui and the old Bookman, turned their heads to the boy and waited for him to come. Kanda was leaning against the wall, cross-armed, and hadn't moved a bit nor said a word. It was Komui who talked first:

"Allen, it seems you went to the Festival yesterday, didn't you?" he asked very seriously.

"Yes, is something the matter?" the boy replied, intrigued.

"Well, did you notice anything... strange? For example, wild youkai appearing and acting abnormally?"

Allen frowned, trying to remember. Kanda had forbidden him to talk about his twin or Lulubell, and that was about all he could remember about that night.

"To be honest, I didn't stayed there for a long time, but I don't think I... oh wait! Now that you mention it, something happened indeed. A man was attacked by a small youkai, but it was nothing serious, I think the youkai must have been scared by something." the boy replied, then seeing the 'I-told-you-so' look Lenalee was giving her brother, he asked: "Why?"

"Ah well, how to put it? The same thing kinda happened to us." Lavi replied, scratching his head.

"You mean, you were attacked by youkai?" Allen asked, surprised.

"No, I mean that Lenalee and I saw quite a bunch of people being attacked. It had never happened on the previous years."

"It's like some youkai have suddenly gone crazy." Lenalee added with a dramatic sigh.

"Were there serious casualties?" the silver-haired boy inquired.

"No, fortunately, since all the attacks were done by small youkai, but still..."

"Lenalee" Komui intervened, trying to calm his sister down. "It is possible that some of the foreigners who have come here for the Festival accidentally upset a few youkai out of ignorance and it scared them."

"You keep saying something scared them and led them to attack humans, and I keep telling you that this isn't normal!" Lenalee raised her voice. "You know perfectly well that weak youkai never wander close to where humans are, they tend to hide!"

"How many of those... attacks did you witness?" Allen asked the girl in an attempt at calming her down.

"About a dozen... maybe more." she replied, thinking. "We ended up leaving earlier than usual because I was fed up running into upset people, the mood was terrible in the end."

"Yeah, I dunno if I'm gonna go back today." Lavi added. "Just see around you how many people have decided not to go back to the Festival." he said as he gestured behind him.

Indeed, Allen noticed that the Temple wasn't as empty as it usually was during that period. He let a small sigh out. He wouldn't be able to enjoy a few days of quietness this year. But that wasn't the point. He turned to Kanda, who still hadn't said anything:

"Do you have any ideas about what happened?" he asked.

"No." the youkai replied shortly.

"Well, I still say there is nothing to worry about, and Bookman agrees with me." Komui repeated while the old man nodded. "And if you want to make sure, you can still go check the city and see if something is wrong. You're an Exorcist after all." he teased his sister.

"Brother! I told you I don't plan to go back this year!" Lenalee stamped her foot.

"Well, if you go to the Festival during daylight, it should be ok since youkai prefer going out at night."

"Ok, ok, let's stop this here for now." Lavi intervened as he patted the girl's shoulder. "How about we go rest a bit?" he offered.

Lenalee pinched her lips, then glared at her brother. In the end, she sighed loudly and shook her head:

"Whatever."

And without adding another word, she left. Komui waited for her to be far enough before resuming:

"I don't know what's gotten into her."

"Well, you have to admit those attacks are a bit strange." Bookman stated. "Though I don't think this is anything serious, it's always better to make sure. I'll go to the Festival tonight and see by myself if something happens again. Lavi, you'll come with me."

"Huh? Oh well, ok..." the redhead replied with obvious lack of enthusiasm. "You're coming too, Allen?"

"I... uhm..." the boy started, trying to find an excuse. "I already planned some things to do, and they are rather important to me, so I'm afraid I'll have to pass." Allen tried to sound apologetic.

"Oh really? Well that's a pity. You're really sure you don't want to come?" Lavi insisted.

"Yes, sorry Lavi. Anyway, I'll take my leave now!" Allen hurriedly replied as he grabbed Kanda's sleeve and started pulling him away. "Let's go Kanda!"

The shikigami, a bit surprised at first, snatched his arm back:

"No need to pull me, Moyashi. I can walk by myself." he said, annoyed, but followed Allen anyway.

"It's Allen, Bakanda."

The three remaining people – namely Komui, Lavi and Bookman – silently looked at the pair leaving. Then Lavi spoke again, though his tone was slightly uncertain:

"Hey, is it me or are they really beginning to get along?"

* * *

"Oi, Moyashi, what did you run away for?" Kanda asked as he was still following the young Exorcist.

"Ah well... I kind of... had to find something not to go to the Festival again." Allen replied very unconvincingly.

"It was the lamest excuse I've ever heard." the youkai sneered.

Allen stopped walking. Then, he replied cautiously:

"Actually... there _is_ something I'd like to do, or rather to ask." If Kanda was going to take him for a fool, then never mind. That dream had been bothering the boy since he woke up, and it wouldn't be the first time Kanda would make fun of him after all. He turned to his shikigami:

"Would you... would you happen to know about a blonde Exorcist, with blue eyes and... whose left arm is missing?" For a second, he felt really stupid for asking the question; however, the look he saw in Kanda's eyes as he raised his own was definitely intriguing. The youkai didn't say anything during several seconds, merely staring at the boy and making the latter feel rather uncomfortable. Then, after what seemed to be an eternity, he slowly asked:

"Who told you about him?" The cold voice in Kanda's tone was certainly not what Allen had expected, and now his curiosity was aroused.

"No one." he replied casually. "I had a dream this night, and the man was in my dream."

"You... dreamt?" Kanda asked, frowning.

"Yes. It was a bit strange. He was in the forest and looked like he was doing a sort of ritual. There were several cups filled with something red, I thought it was wine at first, but he cut his palm and poured some blood in the cups..." Allen paused, making a face at his own words and not noticing Kanda's eyes slowly getting wider as the boy was speaking. "And then he said something funny... though I'm not really sure, it was a dream after all..."

"What did he say?" Kanda cut sharply, slightly surprising Allen who replied anyway:

"He said something about you not having to worry about your next master repeating the same mistake as him again, but it was just a dr..."

Allen didn't have time to finish his sentence as he was suddenly dragged away by Kanda who merely said:

"To your room. We need to talk."

Allen was caught off guard by Kanda's action, and was even more surprised that he wanted to talk. Again? Well, it seemed that his shikigami was more inclined to talk lately, though the boy couldn't tell if it was a good thing or not, since Kanda never deign to speak except out of contempt or unless it was _very_ serious. And Allen had the feeling that right now, the conversation was getting more into the second category, which tended to worry the boy as he didn't know what kind of news he was going to learn from Kanda.

He followed his shikigami to his room, and took seat on his futon while Kanda went to lean against the wall, still standing. A few seconds elapsed silently while Allen waiting patiently for the youkai to speak, which he did after letting an irritated sigh escape:

"You Exorcists are a serious pain in the neck. All of you." he snapped. "I just can't believe how stupid human beings can be, seriously!" Kanda's tone was rising. "No living creature should be allowed to be that idiotic, damn it!" The youkai started pacing back and forth in the small room, almost ignoring Allen who didn't dare interrupt him.

Then Kanda stopped and directed his gaze at the intrigued boy. After an obvious attempt at cooling down, he went on:

"The man you saw in your dream was the Exorcist I had to serve before you. And as for why you dreamt of him, I have a pretty good idea about it."

Inwardly, Kanda was seriously getting tired of explaining so much in such a short time; first about his brother and now about this... Of course he could keep quiet as he usually did, not bothering to pull Allen out of his ignorance; nevertheless, he was progressively getting used to the idea that he couldn't act like usual whenever the damn brat was involved. Not so long ago, he would have seen it as a sign of weakness, but now, it was merely an annoying feeling, an anomaly he couldn't name. Fortunately, the brat was clever enough to keep quiet instead of urging him to talk. From Allen's point of view, it was merely a matter of taking precautions; despite all the questions he had in mind, he knew more than anyone else that an irritated Kanda was the least thing you'd want with you. His patience paid, as the youkai spoke again:

"That idiot is responsible for your chaotic energy control."

Allen stared at Kanda incredulously.

"What?"

"How many cups were there?" the youkai asked instead of replying directly.

"I don't remember... maybe five or six... Why?"

Allen watched as his shikigami sat down in front of him, talking to himself:

"Five or six... The number fits."

"Kanda, do you mind explaining me what's going on?" the boy insisted. It was getting frustrating to obtain all the pieces of information in dribs and drabs, and his patience was seriously beginning to wear off.

"Fine." Kanda replied dryly. "That stupid Exorcist put a curse on you. Or rather, on all his descendants to make sure that my next master – you – would receive the curse. Don't interrupt me." he added as Allen was about to say something. "You said you felt something forcing you to kill Lulubell, well you were right. It was him, through his curse."

"You mean, your previous master?"

"Don't call him my master." Kanda spat. "He was a weakling, weak enough to end up cursing all his lineage. Though I personally don't care, I'm pretty sure you would call it despicable. The principle of the curse is easy: by mixing your blood with a youkai's, it allows you to use your full potential to defeat that same youkai, at the price of losing your mind as you experienced it before. Obviously, the blood in the cups belonged to the Earl's underlings, and maybe to the Earl himself."

Allen was speechless. It was too surreal, too improbable, too... much. He was cursed? By his own ancestor? But why? He shook his head. This was simply too hard to swallow. Meanwhile, Kanda was still talking, unaware of the storm under the boy's head:

"... felt something familiar when you started attacking Lulubell. Now I remember: it was his energy that forced yours to attack without any restriction. However, I think the main trigger is the enemy's energy. Oi, are you listening?" Kanda asked, annoyed.

"Wha- yes, yes I'm listening. It's just that... I don't know what to think about this. It sounds so incredible..." Allen replied, almost to himself. Then, a sudden realization came to him: "Kanda, you said the main trigger is the enemy's energy, but I remember the first time I met Tyki and the others, I... well..."

"You were as useless as a dead fish." Kanda finished, not caring about the hurt look in the boy's eyes. "That's probably because of your barriers. As long as you don't lift them, then nothing will happen. Damn, it's actually the only thing your barriers are useful for."

Allen wanted to protest, but not one sensible word could come out. Both he and Kanda remained silent during a whole minute before the latter stood up and started pacing back and forth again. The boy could tell Kanda was making a huge effort to stay calm, despite his pissed off face. He then asked hesitantly:

"But why would someone curse his descendants? I mean, what kind of mistake was he talking about?"

Kanda stopped pacing at the question then, without looking at Allen, he replied with a tone where repressed anger and contempt were mixed together:

"He was unable to finish the Earl off, despite the fact we were on the verge of defeating him. That stupid Exorcist wasted his only chance at killing the bastard for good, and he failed! Well, it cost him his arm, at least." Kanda added with a faint smirk.

"Why wasn't he able to defeat the Earl?" Allen asked with apprehension at the thought that his shikigami could enjoy his master losing an arm.

"Because he was a human. Weak, gutless, brainless." Each of Kanda's words were filled with venom, and his clenched fists were slightly shaking.

"What happened exactly?" Allen insisted.

"None of your concern. And I don't feel like talking about it." the youkai replied dryly.

Deep inside, Kanda's blood was boiling at the memories that were flashing back in his head. The fury, the rage, the humiliating feeling of victory escaping right under his nose; and all because of one man... It reminded the black-haired youkai of why he despised human beings so much. Everything could have been over if the damn Exorcist had realized that some sacrifices were necessary to achieve their goal, yet the typical weakness of a human heart had allowed the Earl to live on. Of course, they had managed to seal the Earl for more than a hundred years, but that only delayed the inevitable. And now, the brat was paying the price for that 'mistake.'

Allen was clever enough not to insist, sensing that he was getting dangerously near Kanda's line of patience. He tried to change the subject:

"Anyway, isn't it a good thing that I can fight without restrictions? I mean, if I manage to... kill my target, then I won't feel their energy any more and I'll turn back to normal, right?"

The glare he received from Kanda made him gulp.

"You're an idiot. Did your teachers never told you anything about curses?" the youkai asked, more and more irritated.

"Well... not much since we aren't supposed to use them. The only thing I know about them is that even if the curse's effect look attractive at first, there's always a counterpart..." Allen's eyes opened wide as realization hit him. "What's the counterpart of mine?"

Kanda shrugged.

"I don't know." he said.

Allen stood up and grabbed Kanda's sleeve, forcing the shikigami to stop pacing and to look at him.

"Is it true?" Allen asked with a hint of suspicion in his voice.

"You're getting annoying, Moyashi. I'm not supposed to know everything."

The silver-haired boy sighed deeply.

"This is crazy. Kanda, is there any chance that it could only be a dream, after all? That none of this is real?" His voice betrayed the glimpse of hope he had, but Kanda didn't waste time shattering that hope:

"You know the answer." he replied dryly. "Now you need to find out exactly how this curse works, and the counterpart of it. Damn it! If he was still alive, I'd skin him raw!" Kanda let out as he punched the wall next to him.

Allen didn't need to ask who his shikigami was referring to and wondered if his previous master also had had a hard time dealing with Kanda. He tried to calm the youkai down, even if his own mind was pretty confused by all those news:

"I think I could ask Bookman about the... curse. Maybe he could help."

Kanda turned his gaze to the boy.

"Whatever." he merely replied before walking to the door and leaving the room.

Allen sighed again. Just what had he done wrong in his life to deserve such a fate? Why couldn't he live like a normal boy his age, with a family, a house, friends, nothing to worry about, no youkai, no Exorcists, no curses... His body suddenly shivered. He felt cold, though it wasn't physical cold, it was just... a lack of something in him, a need to talk to someone, to pour out all his troubles, to lighten the burden on his shoulders that threatened to make him collapse. But there was no one.

For a second, he thought about Lenalee and Lavi. They were his friends, yet he had the feeling it wasn't them he needed; they wouldn't understand, they would listen to him out of sympathy but they wouldn't understand how he really felt. They were kind and always willing to help him, still, they weren't close enough to understand. The boy sat back on his futon and brought his knees to his chest, resting his forehead on them, and remained still for several minutes, in complete silence.

Kanda's energy. Lately, it had become a normal sensation to Allen, to the extent that he didn't even pay attention to it. Yet, at this present moment when he was feeling more drained and empty than ever, he suddenly got aware again of that link between him and Kanda, of the warm feeling of his energy flowing in him as if to remind him that they were bonded irreversibly. He mentally grasped that feeling and let himself be seized by the small, soothing comfort that emanated from it.

The cold gradually faded.

* * *

Komui put his paintbrush down on the table and yawned, then stood up and exited the room to admire the black, star-studded sky. The fresh air on his face helped him remain awake. He had been working for the whole day and didn't find any time to rest as papers kept piling up on his table. From the people who had been at the Festival on that day, Komui heard nothing worrying about any youkai attack, but then again, youkai disliked coming out in broad daylight. The second night of the Festival had started for hours, Lavi and the old Bookman had gone to the capital city while Lenalee was still sulking in her room.

The Chinese man shook his head with a faint smile at the thought of his sister. She was his most precious person on this earth, but it wasn't a good reason enough to pay attention to each of her fantasies. Lost in his thoughts, he barely noticed the messenger running to him, until he heard him call him:

"Komui-sama, there's a report from Bookman-sama!"

Komui turned his head to the young boy who had stopped running, breathless.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Here are his words: 'A few youkai attacked some people in the north district and destroyed several booths for no apparent reason. No casualties. Lavi and I are staying here to investigate a bit further.' End of the message." the boy finished, waiting for Komui's dismissal.

"Thank you." the older man said before motioning him to leave.

He went back into his work room, frowning and thinking deeply. Now this was troubling.

------------------------------------------------------------------  
Exams are OVER. Well, next ones are in 2 months but never mind that. So I give you guys an update, which I hope you liked. If you didn't, then tell me what you think should be changed in further chapters. As always, any kind of comments are greatly appreciated and only requires a minute of your time. Thank you all for reading! °Lalala..... exams over... more time to write... :D°


	15. Fissure

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property. And gods, chapter 189 was.... so... how the hell is DGM not officially Yullen yet???

* * *

**Chapter 15 - Fissure**

The Festival was finally over, bringing back routine within the activities of the Temple. Allen hadn't been able to talk to Bookman during those two past days since the old man had been busy investigating the youkai matter along with Lavi. The boy was under the impression that problems kept coming like successive waves, adding even more strain on his shoulders. The reports made by Bookman had nothing alarming but it was a serious subject of concern enough and Komui couldn't afford to ignore it.

However, Allen had to admit that he had other priorities in mind than worrying about a few people being attacked by almost harmless creatures. That's the reason why he was heading for the library, hoping to find Bookman there and to ask him questions about his curse. Well, it's not like he intended to say that _he_ was cursed, he would simply tell the old man he needed to improve his knowledge concerning the practice of exorcism. Still, despite everything, he couldn't bring himself to realize that he was bearing a curse since he was born, nor could he believe that it was his own ancestor who had put that curse on him – or rather, on all his descendants. Another troubling part was the reason that had prompted him to commit such an act.

Kanda hadn't been particularly clear about that point and Allen could only make assumptions. Later, maybe, the boy could try and push his luck to see whether he'd manage to convince his shikigami to tell him. Later.

He arrived in front of the library and stepped in silently in order not to disturb the few people there who were busy reading various books or working on some essays given by the teachers. The main room was pretty large, and the high shelves were filled with thousands of documents about youkai, spirits, demons, ceremonial rites, spells, but also history books about famous Exorcists, religion and countless other topics. Yet, Allen had the feeling that the answer he was looking for wasn't written in those books; that's why he went straight to the small room at the end of the main one, which he knew to be Bookman's working room though it was the first time he ever came here.

As the door was open, Allen allowed himself to enter without knocking. The room wasn't as well lit as the main one, or maybe it was the humongous number of books and scrolls filling the whole room that was giving him that impression. It wasn't messy at all as all the documents were filed according to themes in shelves.

"Hmm, excuse me, is there anyone here?" he asked politely as he didn't see anyone sitting in front of the low table. Two seconds later, the head of the old man appeared from behind one of the shelves.

"What do you need, young Exorcist?" Bookman asked from his spot.

"Ah, well... I'd like to ask you a few questions about some... curses. Teachers never really detailed much on that topic and I was wondering whether you could tell me more about it." Allen replied carefully, not missing the frown on the old man's face.

"Is there any particular reason you would like to hear about curses?" he asked again.

Of course, Allen had expected to be questioned about his interest for curses, that's why he was also prepared to tell some of the truth, though as little as possible.

"It involves the Earl, and maybe how to defeat him." he replied.

Bookman remained still for several seconds, looking at the boy with severe eyes as if he wanted to make sure that Allen was serious, before nodding curtly and motioning him to come. Allen mentally thanked the gods that Bookman was the kind of person who never bothered about other people's business and could perfectly grasp the importance of a situation with few questions.

The old man went on:

"All the archives you see here are my personal documents, so be careful with them. Now, you said it involves the Earl, so I assume that you would like to have information on very powerful curses, am I wrong?"

Though Allen didn't have any idea of the level of his curse, his common sense was telling him to nod.

"Yes, powerful and ancient ones, if possible." he replied, remembering what Kanda had told him before. The old man looked thoughtful for a second before searching through his archives and pulling an old, dusted book from one of the shelves and handing it to Allen.

"I trust you to take care of it and not to lend it to anyone else." he merely said.

"Yes, I'll be careful. Thank you." Allen replied before bowing and leaving the library.

* * *

A knock on the door made Komui raise his head.

"Come in." he said, and immediately refrained from sighing as he saw the messenger boy carrying another pile of scrolls in his arms. "Let me guess: they are all exorcism requests?" he asked, though he already knew the answer.

"Yes, Komui-sama. Where shall I put them?"

"Next to the ones you brought me this morning, if there's enough room." the Chinese man replied wearily.

The messenger obeyed, then bowed and quickly left the room. Komui removed his glasses and rubbed his tired eyes. How was he going to manage all those requests? For the past three days, they had been piling up at an unusually quick pace; Komui had skimmed through most of them, and none of them were very serious ones, but what worried him most was their number. There weren't enough Exorcists to deal with them, and Komui couldn't afford to tire them out by repeatedly sending them out. Something was wrong, and it had started on the first night of the Festival. Lenalee was right after all, and he would have to remember apologizing for not taking her seriously at first.

However, right now, he had to take measures for those attacks to stop as soon as possible before things got more serious. Yes, but what kind of measures? The origin of the disturbance among the youkai was still unknown, and even Bookman had admitted that he didn't have any clue as for where to start searching.

A new knock pulled him out of his thoughts.

"Yes." he merely said, praying that it wasn't the messenger boy again. To his relief, the panel was slid open to reveal the smiling face of his beloved sister.

"Brother, I'm done with my request, here's the payment!" she said cheerfully as she handed Komui a small purse. Then her eyes widened as she saw the messy pile of new requests scrolls: "Gods, don't tell me there are that many unfilled requests?"

The heavy sigh coming from her brother was enough an answer for her. She frowned:

"What's happening lately? Why are there so many requests all of a sudden?"

"I fear you were right to suspect something behind the first attacks of youkai during the Festival..." Komui replied with a poor smile. "I don't know what's going on, but we have to find a way to stop those attacks before it turns into something dangerous."

"Dangerous? But all the youkai which attack aren't very powerful ones."

"For now..."

Lenalee kept silent a few seconds, before going on on a more cheerful tone:

"Anyway, give me another request, I'm ready to get back to work!"

"You're not serious, Lenalee. Have some rest first, you've been at it for two days already and you've practised exorcism more than what's good for your health."

"Don't worry, I'm feeling perfectly fine. I promise I'll go rest as soon as I feel tired, but for now, there people who need us to get rid of youkai for them." the Chinese girl insisted. And without waiting for her brother's approval, she grabbed the first scroll she saw and hurriedly left the room, waving at a resigned Komui. He shook his head at her sister's stubbornness, yet a faint smile was drawn on his lips.

* * *

Allen dropped the book on his futon where he was sitting, dejected. He had prepared for many different scenarios, but certainly not _that_. How could... how could his ancestor dare force such a cruel fate on him? And according to Kanda, it was because of that same ancestor's mistake that he had to bear a curse that was going to destroy the little hope he had in life. He wasn't demanding, he only wished to live as normally as possible given his status as an Exorcist, he only wished to spend his years helping other people out thanks to his gifts, and then, when he'd be old enough, he'd be allowed to remain at the Temple as thanks for his years of service.

The boy fell back on his futon, dull eyes gazing at nothing in particular. Of course he should have guessed that nothing could never go as planned, no matter what he wished for.

The counterpart of the curse. The more powerful the curse, the higher the counterpart. Allen closed his eyes. Then his curse had to be _really_ powerful. Of course, since it allowed the cursed one to use all his powers to their fullest potential, even if the user wasn't particularly strong. From the tip of his fingers, he grabbed the book and opened it at the page that had made his heart froze for a whole minute. His eyes lingered on those lines again and again, trying to make sure he hadn't read it wrong.

He didn't know whether to laugh or cry, because it looked so huge and at the same time so expected that it was almost comical. That's why it was easier for Allen to recover from the initial shock he'd received after reading the book. Well, he was getting used to taking any kind of blow now, and in a way, it was beginning to immunize him. Allen would have chuckled if the situation wasn't that serious.

He suddenly decided that he didn't care any more, it's not like he could change anything anyway, so he had better take everything that was coming to him with philosophy. Oh, and Kanda wasn't there to learn the great news since he had disappeared to the gods know where, though Allen could feel him in the vicinity through their energy bond.

Allen ran his hand through his hair and let a small sigh out. A thought crossed his mind, or rather, a feeling. The feeling that having Kanda by his side was alleviating and contributed to him not turning distraught by that curse. Little by little, he was realizing how much that bond was essential for him whenever he needed some support; and needless to say, the fact that he could find comfort in that invisible link still intrigued him to no end. The only question that remained unanswered was how his shikigami was feeling towards him, if he even felt anything close to concern.

The boy shook his head. This wasn't the time to clutter his mind up with more delicate issues. At that same moment, he suddenly remembered that Lenalee's birthday was approaching and he wanted to find her a decent gift, as he did every year. A little trip in the capital city would be perfect to find a present. And to lighten his mood.

* * *

As he was walking inside the main district of the capital, Allen was trying to determine which kind of gift would please the Chinese girl; well, she wasn't very difficult and always accepted any present with a broad smile. The boy kept wandering between every shop, undecided as for what to buy and above all, very careful not to listen to the sellers' tempting offers that would empty his purse in a blink of an eye.

Allen arrived in front of a small shop in front of which an old woman was sitting on a chair, and next to her, a table on which were displayed various hair accessories. As he was examining the items, the woman shrieked. Allen barely got time to see the small youkai that had jumped on the table and angrily threw all the items everywhere with its long tail before jumping on the woman to scratch her. Fortunately, Allen reacted quickly enough and stunned the youkai with a single spell. The creature immediately fell on the ground, immobile.

"Are you ok?" the young Exorcist asked the old woman as he helped her sit back on the chair. Some other people had also hurried closer to offer some help.

"Yes, I'm fine, young boy. Thanks to you." she replied with a weak smile. "I was simply surprised, that's all."

Allen didn't answer though he could say he was also intrigued by the attack. He picked up the youkai. It looked like a beige ferret with black markings. At first sight, Allen didn't find anything strange that could have explained the creature's strange behaviour. He frowned; this was getting more and more abnormal, since the Festival had started, youkai had been unusually aggressive towards humans and it was beginning to be worrying. Yet, knowing that something was wrong wasn't going to help Allen find the origin of the problem, and the boy sighed at the thought. He then released the spell on the youkai, and the creature immediately fled out of sight.

"It's been occurring more frequently lately." a man commented while picking up the scattered hair accessories and putting them back on the table.

"Yes, we don't understand what attracts the youkai here and what prompts them to attack us." another went on.

"Young boy?" the old woman called Allen. "Here, as a token of my gratitude, choose anything you like from these." she said as she made a gesture towards the table.

"Wh- oh no, I can't do that." the boy replied. "It was only natural for me to help you since I'm an Exorcist." he added with a smile.

"But I insist, pick one of your liking for your beloved, it's the least I can do to thank you." the woman replied.

"M-my beloved?" Allen was caught off guard for a second. An image of Kanda crossed his mind but he quickly dismissed it, finding utterly ridiculous to even think of his shikigami as his 'beloved'. He went on as naturally as possible: "It's for a friend only."

"A friend? Well, it doesn't matter, just pick one." the woman offered again.

"Do as she says, boy, it's better not to annoy her!" one of the present people said teasingly.

Allen smiled, then nodded.

"If you insist, then." he said before choosing a small hairpin with a white water lily chiselled on it.

"Oh, I'm sure your friend will love this one." the woman agreed. "She will look lovely with it."

"Thank you for the present." Allen merely replied as he bowed, then left.

As he was walking back to the Temple, he kept playing with the small hairpin, a smile on his lips, hoping that Lenalee would appreciate it. Well, presents were always appreciated, whether they came from lovers or friends. And it was at that precise moment that an absurd thought came to him. Maybe... he could also offer Kanda something... a little something simply to... to what? Show him that he cared for his shikigami? Kanda wouldn't even take it seriously. Still... why not... with a bit of luck, Kanda would accept it without asking any question. Allen shrugged. _'Well, I'll buy something not too expensive, just in case.'_

* * *

For the hundredth time on his way back, Allen looked at the bracelet resting in the palm of his hand and wondered for the same hundredth time how he was going to offer it to Kanda. It was nothing too flashy or inconvenient – a mere bracelet made of round and plain wooden pearls – but the boy had absolutely no idea what kind of reaction to expect from his shikigami. He shook his head. Right now, giving a present to Kanda was almost scaring him as much as facing the Earl's underlings and the thought made Allen chuckle. This was getting ridiculous; he'd give Kanda the present and that'd be all, it was easy.

He was walking in the noisy main street, full of shops and people, and didn't pay any particular attention to the tea shop on his right until he heard a voice calling him:

"Hey, brat."

Allen glanced towards the direction the voice was coming and frowned as he saw his shikigami sitting at a table, sipping at a cup of tea.

"Kan..." he started, surprised, but immediately stopped as he noticed the small detail that made all the difference: the black-haired demon in front of him had his hair tied in a long ponytail.

"It's Kanrou." the youkai finished for him, a smirk on his lips. "No, no, no, I didn't come to fight you or anything." he added hastily as Allen had already pulled a seal out and was about to lift his barriers. "And I'm alone, if that's what you fear."

That didn't help Allen let his attention wander; on the contrary, his whole body was tense though not paralysed by fear and his eyes were focused on the demon who was looking at him, amused. Saying that the boy wasn't panicking inside would have been a lie, yet he was trying hard not to show it. He couldn't feel any spiritual energy coming from the demon, probably because he was suppressing it. What was Kanda's brother doing there? And how could he be sure that there wasn't any other demon, despite what he had said? If he was going to fight, was there any chance for him to survive? And how about all the people around them? Allen couldn't afford to get anyone hurt.

All those questions came at the same time in Allen's mind as long as the few words Kanda had uttered about that brother. _'He's strong.'_ The boy bit his lip. He couldn't call Kanda through their bond for they were too far away.

"Come on, I said I didn't come here to fight, so you have nothing to worry about. Not today at least." Kanrou went on casually.

"Then why are you here?" Allen asked, suspicious.

"I just wanted to see the human whom my dear brother has to serve with my own eyes." he replied, and Allen didn't miss the disdainful tone he had used on the word 'human'. "Such pitiful creatures you are, you humans. Short lifespan, forced to rely on youkai to defend yourselves, weak."

It was hard for Allen not to believe that the demon in front of him was Kanda; that speech about the weakness of human beings sounded so familiar he almost chuckled.

"You didn't come here simply to insult me, did you?" Allen cut sharply.

"Insult you? I'm merely stating facts. Anyway, as I said before, I came to see with my own eyes your worth, and unfortunately, I didn't expect anything better."

Allen was too much on his guard to pay actual attention to the demon's words; he was much busier trying to determine what was his true goal and, above all, how he was going to manage if he had to start a duel with him. As he looked at Kanrou once more, he had to admit the demon's behaviour was intriguing him. He was merely sitting there and drinking tea while being absolutely oblivious to the furtive looks some young women were casting at him. It seemed like he really didn't intend to fight the boy, yet the latter wasn't foolish enough to let his guard down.

"And now that you saw me, what do you plan to do?" Allen asked coldly.

"My, my, you have some guts to dare speak to me with that tone. You know that I could kill you right here, right now for your arrogance, and your dear, useless and pathetic shikigami would lose all his powers." the demon replied pleasantly.

"I don't intend to get myself killed that easily." Allen snapped. "And Kanda isn't useless nor pathetic. If I recall correctly, you were defeated by him some time ago." He was playing with fire, he knew it, but hearing Kanda being insulted was making him boil inside, because – it was getting easier for him to admit it – Kanda was _his_ shikigami, and he was taking pride in it.

Allen's words made the youkai twitch, but the latter managed to remain composed as he spoke again:

"Trying to defend him, aren't you? However, I know my brother well enough to dare say he isn't the kind to have humans defend him. He despises your kin as much as I do, so you should at least hate him a bit, am I wrong?"

"Yes, you are." Allen replied at once, before even thinking. His answer not only surprised Kanrou, but himself as well, as the boy should have been the first one to agree with the demon about Kanda's absolute scorn of human beings. Yet, he defended him.

"Then you either are pretty stupid, or you don't know Kanda at all. Maybe both." Kanrou replied icily. "You have no idea what hides behind the one you seem so proud of." Then, on a more normal tone, he added: "Actually, I also wanted to meet you for this purpose. I think you must have plenty of questions about Kanda, and I'm willing to give you some answers."

"Why would you?" Allen asked suspiciously.

"Because I want to show you that your shikigami may not be who you think he is."

"If you're talking about the fact that Kanda killed many people, I already know that. And I'm asking it again: why would you tell me about him?"

Kanrou let a sigh out and tried to remain calm. At least, Allen had to admit that he was more patient than his twin Kanda.

"Now, the question isn't why I'd like to, but rather 'would you like to know about Kanda?'" he asked, a faint, strange smile on his lips.

Allen couldn't deny the offer was tempting. He _did_ want to have answers to his many questions about Kanda, about his past, about what had prompted him to try to kill his brother; yet, it felt like a trap. Why would his enemy be willing to give him information? But it was so tempting...

Seeing the hesitation on the boy's face, the smile on Kanrou's lips widened as he spoke again, with his most persuasive tone:

"Well? How about you stop seeing me as a threat for the time being, and start listening to a sweet story instead? Come, sit and have some tea with me."

* * *

"_...tremendous power, beyond any expectation. However, the user will be aware that it will consume both his mind and body more quickly than an normal use of exorcism. The few recorded uses of this spell have showed that the Exorcist tend to lose himself in the greatness of the power it provides until madness takes all common sense from his mind. A strong will can overcome this attraction and keep its sanity; however, no Exorcist who summons the powers of the curse can hope to reach past his mid-twenties. The..."_

Kanda closed the book. He didn't even bother to read the end of the page. For a few seconds, he remained immobile, standing in the middle of Allen's room, an impassive expression on his traits. For a few seconds only.

"Che. Stupid Exorcists!" he let out as he almost threw the book away. Fortunately, it landed on Allen's futon with no damage. What was he upset for, actually? He didn't know. Why had the brat not told him about it yet? And where was he? Kanda couldn't feel him near, and it added to his frustration.

There was no reason for the youkai to feel particularly pissed at what he had just read; yet he couldn't help the slight trembling in his clenched fist. The brat wasn't going to live long, and so what? It's not like a few decades made any difference for Kanda. Still, an unpleasant feeling was stirring inside him and made him let another 'che' out. He needed to cool off and not let unnecessary emotions take over him, there wasn't much more he could do, beside waiting for Allen to return from wherever he was at the moment.

* * *

"He killed our whole clan. He and I are the only ones left." Kanrou stated quietly after taking another sip of tea.

Allen was merely sitting immobile in front of him, not touching his own cup, waiting for the demon to go on. He didn't react as the latter pronounced those words, absolutely resolute not to give any credit to them as long as he didn't have any more explanation. Kanrou seemed to notice it, and raised an eyebrow.

"Aren't you even the slightest bit shocked by what I've just told you?" he asked.

"Why would you care about my opinion?" Allen asked dryly instead of replying, which made the youkai twitch again.

"Oi, oi... you really have some nerves to talk to me like this. I'm merely trying to comprehend what makes you support my brother like that. Anyway, as I said before, he massacred our entire clan. And not only our clan, but he also wiped out part of the Earl's as well."

"But you are still alive." the young Exorcist said, impassive.

A smirk appeared on the youkai's lips, and again, Allen almost mistook him for Kanda. They were identical to an extent that was barely believable, even between twins.

"Indeed. I suppose you'd like to know how, am I wrong? But telling you about me isn't my purpose right now. Aren't you curious to know more about your shikigami?"

Again, Allen kept silent.

"You stubborn brat." Kanrou let out. "I'll tell you anyway what kind of youkai Kanda is." He paused, and disgust started appearing on his traits as he spat his words almost like venom: "He yearns for power, more than you could ever imagine, more than any demon could imagine. Our kin is one of the most powerful ones, strength is innate and flows naturally in us and we are satisfied with it. However, Kanda is an exception. Feel free not to believe me, but he and I used to be inseparable, thus we knew everything about each other. And I knew about his thirst for power, since his early years. I kept trying to subdue that thirst that was slowly taking over him, unfortunately I failed. And the worst part in the story is that no one in the clan had ever suspected anything from him, because he was a master at hiding his true intentions. So, to make the story short, his greed grew to the point that, one day, he took on our clan's leader and killed him in order to steal his slot. Of course, the clan would have accepted him if it wasn't for the fact that he wanted all of us to declare war to our allied clan – the Earl's clan – and to take over it as well. So Kanda settled the problem by decimating all those who were against him."

"This is ridiculous." Allen cut the youkai. He couldn't imagine a single second the Kanda who was being depicted by his twin. It simply didn't fit Kanda.

"Oh, you think so? Listen, you have absolutely no idea of what can go on in a demon's mind. Kanda wanted to demonstrate how far he could go to satisfy his thirst for power, and even now, he still clings to power more than ever."

"How could you tell? You haven't been by his side for centuries." Allen retorted. "And I dare say that all of you demons cling to power, so Kanda is no exception."

Kanrou forced a laugh.

"Of course he is. Didn't you hear what I said? He killed his own clan and part of the Earl's. No demon is foolish enough to destroy what makes his roots."

"Let's assume that you're telling the truth. What does it have to do with me? Kanda can't harm me since his my shikigami." Allen asked.

"That's true. But what will happen after your death? He'll be free again, free to act as he pleases again, free to kill whoever he wants, youkai and humans. He'll go on such a rampage that you won't be able to recognize the landscape after that."

The faint tension on the boy's face showed Kanrou that he had hit the sensitive spot, that's why he went on:

"As long as he is bound to be your shikigami, he won't do anything that will betray his nature. However, I let you imagine how it feels for such a prideful demon to be forced to serve lowly creatures for several generations. You don't realize the extent of the revenge that has been building up in him for all this time; needless to say that as soon as he's set free, he'll catch up for all the time he lost."

"You're lying." Allen replied, though his voice was slightly shaking. "Kanda isn't like that."

"Childish answer. Then what do you think he'll do after you die?"

This time, Allen remained silent not because he didn't want to answer, but because he couldn't answer. Of course he had thought about what would happen after he died, of course he couldn't stand the thought of Kanda killing people again, yet he wanted to convince himself that Kanda was different from his former self, that there was a chance that he... he what? The boy painfully realized that he had never considered his shikigami doing anything else but turn back to being a feared demon who killed whenever he felt like it.

"Shall I understand that your silence means you agree with me?" a voice brought him back to reality.

Allen raised his eyes to the demon who was gazing at him with a satisfied look. The confusion on the boy's face was obvious.

"Just what do you expect from me after telling me all that?" he asked, unable to find anything else to say.

"Don't trust Kanda as much as you do. And let me take care of him."

"Take care of him? You mean..."

"I'll kill him. And I'd like you not to interfere."

Allen looked at the youkai, incredulous.

"If you want to kill him, then why haven't you killed me yet? That way, it'll be easier for you."

"You sure like tempting me, brat." Kanrou sneered. "And I can't kill you because I've been ordered not to do so. The Earl wants to meet with you."

"The Earl sent demons to kill me not so long ago. Why would he want to see me now?" Allen asked, getting more and more suspicious.

"It seems there's something in you that caught his interest. Don't ask me what, he doesn't share all his secrets with me." the youkai replied with a shrug.

Allen didn't look particularly convinced, but for now, he had to contend himself with that answer.

"Anyway, you don't seriously expect me to let you kill my shikigami. And anyway, I thought you didn't consider me as a threat for you, so why do you bother asking me not to interfere?"

"Well, it's true that your level of energy is awfully low, but I heard that you can become pretty impressive when you want to, so I'm just taking some precautions." Kanrou replied casually.

"You'll never manage to kill Kanda. And I won't let you kill him." Allen declared coldly.

"Are you stupid?" the demon's tone rose as he was clearly losing patience. "He's a threat for you humans, he'll obliterate your kind as soon as he's free. And he won't spare any youkai on his way either."

"The Earl isn't much better. And Kanda can defeat the Earl. That's why I need him."

"And after he does? What will you do?" Kanrou asked, irritated.

Allen opened his mouth, but no word came out. He remembered the many times Kanda had mentioned the pleasure he'd get once he was done serving him, yet at the same time, he also remembered Kanda's rare moments of... weakness, if he could ever be weak; when he had remained by Allen's side while he was at the hospital room, when he had carried him because he was too exhausted to walk, when he had let him kiss him... All those moments when Kanda showed a human side. Was he allowed to hope?

"Kanda is a demon. Don't forget that." A sharp voice cut Allen's thoughts. "And don't forget that he didn't hesitate to annihilate his own kin. There's no reason for him not to do the same with you humans. Think carefully about it."

Then the youkai stood up and walked away, leaving a more than troubled boy behind him. As Allen also stood up to look for Kanrou, the latter had already vanished from the landscape. Allen bit his lip. He was being stupid to defend Kanda. Of course he couldn't forget that he was a demon! Of course he knew that he was fooling himself by thinking that a mere Exorcist like him could somehow have any affect on Kanda! But what could he possibly do? The demon had already taken over him – in both mind and body – more than he wanted to believe, and he couldn't stand the idea being separated from Kanda.

Allen shook his head. He felt like going back to square one whenever he thought of his relationship with his shikigami, always wondering how sincere Kanda could be towards the boy.

He needed to see him. That's why he hurried back to the Temple without wasting another second.

As soon as he arrived, he went straight for his room, feeling that Kanda was inside, and indeed, he was. The youkai was sitting at his usual spot, dark blue eyes staring at him with a strange glint of... irritation? Allen couldn't identify it, and he didn't care at the moment.

"Kanda!" he called after carefully closing the panel behind him. "I need to talk to you about..."

"Your curse?" Kanda cut him sharply. "No need to, I read it myself." Then, before Allen could reply anything, he stood up while going on: "Why didn't you tell me earlier about it?"

"A-about what?"

"The counterpart!" Kanda replied almost angrily as he walked towards Allen.

It took him several seconds to grasp what Kanda was talking about, before he opened his eyes wide. The boy's mind had been so busy with his encounter with Kanrou that he had completely forgotten about the curse... and its counterpart.

"Oh, that! Well, now you know what the counterpart is. But this isn't the point. I want to talk to you ab..."

"You're sure you read it carefully?" Kanda cut him again. "Because it doesn't look like so."

Allen sighed.

"Listen, can we put this topic aside for now and..."

"Damn it, what's wrong with you?" Kanda asked as he seized the boy by the collar, visibly repressing his anger. "You know you won't be able to live for much longer, and that's all it does to you?"

"Why do you care?" the boy ended up replying, exasperated. "I don't understand why you're so angry with that, it has nothing to do with you! Unless you fear that ten years or so won't be enough to defeat the Earl? Is that it?"

"Don't talk nonsense, it's..."

"Then what is it? What's wrong with me dying in a few years? Isn't it convenient for you? You'll be free from your curse even earlier! You'll be free to do whatever you want!" Allen let out, suddenly as pissed as his shikigami.

Kanda froze at those words, eyes filled with astonishment. The thought hadn't even crossed his mind!

"You..." the youkai started slowly, his grip tightening on Allen's collar. "You really don't get it at all, do you?" he snapped, more than pissed.

"Get what?" Allen asked equally.

"I don't give a damn about my curse!"

"Then tell me what the problem is!" Allen went on, cheesed off.

As a sole answer, Kanda roughly pushed him towards the futon, and pinned him on it. If words weren't going to work on the brat, then maybe something else would. Beneath him, Allen was squirming in an attempt at freeing himself, though unsuccessfully because of Kanda's weight over him.

"Moyashi."

The boy stopped moving for an instant, surprised by the change of tone in Kanda's voice. There was no more irritation in it. He raised his eyes to the youkai's, intrigued.

Kanda was staring at him again, not knowing what had prompted him to pin the boy under him, nor where all his frustration was coming from, nor why he was feeling so concerned for Allen while the latter looked completely indifferent to his own fate. Just what was wrong with the damn brat? Kanda had never met someone who cared so little about their own life like him, it simply felt too... wrong. He was used to dealing with normal people who clung to their lives even if it meant sacrificing others', and this idiotic moyashi was everything but normal.

And that's why Kanda didn't want to let go of him. The brat was the first master towards whom he truly felt a bond – no matter how twisted the bond was – beyond what his curse imposed on him.

"Kanda?" the boy asked softly, confused by his shikigami's behaviour. The youkai plunged his eyes into Allen's silver ones, noticing the faint blush on his master's cheeks. Their gazes remained locked on each other for a moment, as none of them spoke. Then Kanda approached his mouth to the boy's ear:

"Let me take you." he whispered.

Allen opened his eyes wide, not expecting such a request. In a matter of seconds, his heartbeat increased in spite of himself, his whole body frozen. He gulped silently, ignoring how to react to those words. Above him, Kanda still hadn't moved, obviously waiting for his answer. Was he really serious? Allen wondered.

"Let me." Kanda repeated again. The murmur at the boy's ear sent shivers through his spine, and he closed his eyes in an attempt at calming down, fully aware that he wasn't going to resist for much longer.

As he wrapped his arms around Kanda to pull him closer, any thought about his curse or Kanrou's encounter vanished to leave room to only one person: Kanda.

The demon didn't waste time attacking Allen's neck, pressing his lips on the boy's pale skin and running them up to his flushed cheek. At the same time, Allen turned his face to Kanda and approached his partly open lips to his shikigami's, one hand running in the long, ebony hair that was falling on both sides of his head. Kanda claimed the boy's mouth as eagerly as the past night, savouring the stifled sounds that were coming out from it. Pressed against the smaller body, he could almost feel Allen's faint trembling as he inserted his knee between his master's legs, though the layers of clothes separating them didn't allow the boy to fully enjoy the pressure exerted on his sensitive part.

Kanda seemed to notice it, and sat up while pulling the boy to him, their lips still locked together until he broke the kiss.

"Your costumes are really a pain in the neck." he said as he started slipping his hands under the white tunic to remove it. Allen let him do, even helping him by getting rid of the tunic by himself before his hands reached for Kanda's kimono belt. He untied it hurriedly and opened the kimono enough to reveal that perfect chest marred by the tattoo, proof of the curse responsible for Kanda being his shikigami right now.

With his hand, Allen slowly traced the black pattern of the tattoo, at the same time feeling Kanda's heartbeat against his chest. Then he raised his silver eyes to his shikigami who was staring at him with unhidden lust, and buried his face in the crook of Kanda's neck. After a small sigh, a mere murmur escaped his lips:

"Do whatever you want."

Allen had long given up on resisting something he couldn't even explain, thinking instead that there was nothing wrong with listening to what his body wanted; that it wasn't much different than eating when he was hungry, drinking when he was thirsty, sleeping when he was tired. And now, the only thing that he wanted was Kanda. Now, he couldn't care less if Kanda was a demon yearning for power who had decimated a whole clan. All that mattered to him was to retrieve once again the intoxicating feeling of Kanda holding him, claiming him and never letting him go. After all, since he had only a few years left to live, there was no point in not enjoying them as much as possible.

The demon didn't need to be told twice as he quickly removed the boy's clothes, leaving him only in his kimono. He opened the top, and made it slide along Allen's shoulders to his waist, then sealed his lips over the boy's again while gently pushing him back down on the futon. His mouth trailed down Allen's neck, biting it and making the boy hiss. As he ran his hand up along Allen's arm, he could feel the long scar that deformed the pale skin.

True. The brat had had some issues with youkai years ago. And now he was letting himself be taken by a youkai. The way human brains worked was still a mystery for Kanda, yet right now it was the last of his concerns. Right now, he only wanted to take possession once more of the one human who had managed to shake his mind to an extent he'd never have suspected, and who was now lying underneath him, breath ragged, face flushed and above all, willing. The kid was driving him crazy, his mere presence was tantalizing enough to threaten Kanda's little self-control, and now that he had allowed him to do as he pleased, Kanda wasn't going to put any restrictions on his desire for the boy.

Allen wrapped his arms around Kanda's neck to pull him as close to him as possible; the frictions between their bodies were awakening his arousal and he could feel that Kanda wasn't insensitive to it either. Unconsciously, his back arched as Kanda slid a hand under his kimono to reach his member and let a loud moan out; but this wasn't near enough for him.

"Kan...da... send me... your energy..." he managed to articulate, though with difficulty.

Kanda raised an eyebrow at the request. Not even two weeks had passed since the first time they did it, and now the boy was completely different, asking for more instead of refusing the pleasure that Kanda provided him. Well, he didn't mind playing along.

"Is it an order?" he asked, enjoying the frown he earned from Allen.

"No... yes... aah... just..." the Exorcist wasn't able to form coherent sentences, thanks to Kanda who was working on him with a skilled hand. The youkai smirked, satisfied that the boy was so easy to please, and finally complied with his request.

As soon as he felt the wave of energy engulfing him, Allen gasped loudly as he clung to Kanda even tighter.

"Kanda... do it... again..." he said, almost pleading.

"Eager, aren't we?" the youkai asked in return. "Then let's not make you wait too long." he added as he quickened his pace on Allen's member and pressed his lips against the boy's, muffling any sound that could come out of his mouth.

They were literally devouring each other, though the demon was more forceful and demanding, but it didn't mean that Allen didn't yearn for it any less. They were both craving for each other with the same intensity, the same passion and the same violence, pleasure slowly building up in them, though Allen was the closest to releasing as Kanda worked mercilessly on him. He didn't last for much longer and a cry escape his lips as he reached his limits. Still, Kanda wasn't done with him.

His fingers slowly trailed in the liquid that was spread on Allen's chest while his dark blue eyes lingered on the boy who was panting heavily and looking at him, not yet sated and waiting almost impatiently for what was coming next. It intrigued him to no end how Allen had changed in such a short period of time, there had to be something that had caused him to change, though Kanda couldn't tell what.

"Is there... something wrong?" the boy asked, seeing that Kanda had stopped moving.

The latter didn't answer, instead he moved his fingers down between Allen's legs, and the second after, the boy was hissing and gasping as he felt Kanda's intrusion in him. That mere preparation was enough for him to feel his arousal grow again, and his poor attempts at keeping his voice down were reduced to nothing as Kanda brushed on his sensitive spot. Satisfied with Allen's reaction, the demon went on as he slowly leant forward to capture his master's lips once more; then, deciding that foreplay was over, he removed his fingers and positioned himself between the boy's legs.

Allen's back arched as Kanda was slowly joining their bodies together, and wrapped both his arms around his shikigami's neck, biting his lower lip as pain seized him. Well, it's not like he hadn't expected it, it was only his second time and his body had yet to get used to Kanda. However, pain was quickly forgotten as Kanda started emitting waves of energy that were pulsing inside Allen's whole being, making him drown in complete ecstasy.

Each moan, each gasp, each sound Allen was making were used to feed Kanda's unquenched thirst for him, his insatiable appetite was sending the boy's body to burn and be consumed by overflows of pleasure. They were so painfully drawn to each other that it was impossible to tell who was craving the most for the other's touch, their need for each other was slowly turning into overwhelming passion, then raw lust.

Allen just couldn't get enough of feeling Kanda inside of him, and Kanda simply couldn't stop claiming Allen's body again and again. Whether it was an urge, an impulse or a mere whim that had led them to this point, they didn't want to know. Right now, they only wanted to let their bodies speak for themselves, and speak they did.

As they were merging together with more passion than ever, climax seized them completely, Allen calling out Kanda's name while the latter bit hard on the boy's pale neck, drawing a few drops of blood out, as if to definitely mark him as his possession. They were panting heavily and sweating from their activity, Kanda still lying over Allen who had now his eyes closed and was trying to ignore the tickle of Kanda's hot breath against his ear. None of them deigned to move for several minutes, until Allen suddenly remembered something.

He held his hand out with difficulty to his Exorcist robe that was lying beside him and searched through it for a minute before pulling out a small item.

"Kanda."

The youkai didn't answer nor move, but Allen knew that he was listening.

"Here. It's for you." Allen went on as he slipped the item in Kanda's hand that was lying next to his face. The youkai took it, then sat up to take a look at it. He raised an eyebrow.

"What's this for?" he asked almost suspiciously.

"A mere gift. If you don't like it, give it back." Allen replied casually.

"Che."

A faint smile crossed the boy's lips as he saw Kanda keeping the bracelet in his closed hand. He rolled on the side while pulling his kimono over him and closed his eyes with a small sigh.

He had done it again. He and Kanda. He had willingly offered himself to a demon and, strangely enough, it didn't fill him with disgust. After all, as long as the step of the first time was crossed, doing it a second time couldn't worsen anything, could it? Actually, during all the time he was locked in Kanda's embrace, it had even given him the sensation of a temporary safety, an ephemeral means to put all his worries aside; and especially his worries about Kanda. Letting his shikigami hold him again was a way for him to close his eyes on the doubts and the countless questions he had about him.

Of course, Allen didn't fool himself by thinking that Kanda actually felt something for him, it was certainly a mere entertainment for the youkai. Still, Kanda's earlier reaction about the counterpart of his curse intrigued him. If he wasn't concerned about him not being able to defeat the Earl during the period of time he had left to live, then why had Kanda been so upset? It wasn't making any sense for Allen.

And then, the conclusion he didn't want to draw came to him anyway. The disturbing thought that Kanda may actually show hints of concern – though not too obviously – about him. Allen shifted uncomfortably at the thought.

"Oi, Moyashi." Kanda's low voice abruptly called him.

Allen slowly opened his eyes.

"It's Allen, Bakanda." he merely replied.

"What did you want to talk about earlier?" the youkai went on, completely ignoring the remark.

Earlier? Allen frowned. Oh, true. Kanrou's tale about his twin's bloody past. But how was he going to put it to Kanda? He couldn't simply tell him he had met his brother while having a walk in the city and then had a cup of tea with him while the latter told him that Kanda was a kin slayer. The mere mention of Kanrou's name was enough to make Kanda lose his temper, and Allen wasn't particularly eager to bear with it right now. After all, it's not like he had any obligation to tell his shikigami every detail of his life. So he merely said:

"It's nothing important."

Then he closed his eyes again, ignoring the frown on Kanda's features.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Here's an update :] Liked it? For those who are getting tired that nothing's happening, don't worry, action will resume in the next chapter.  
Thank you all for reading this and for your reviews! They make my day!  
By the way, updates may be irregular now because I'm in the middle of a campaign with some classmates to become the new school's student council, so my free time is very limited. Thanks for understanding.


	16. Frozen

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property. But I'd bribe her with everything I have to get some Yullen in it.

* * *

**Chapter 16 - Frozen  
**

One month had passed since Allen's meeting with Kanda's twin brother. Winter was reaching its end and, already, the temperature was warming up, allowing small leaves and buds to appear on the naked branches of the trees. However, Allen wasn't really in the mood to admire the rebirth of a new cycle of lady Nature. And not only him, but it seemed that the whole Temple was bathing in a rather glum atmosphere, mainly because of the youkai attacks that kept multiplying regardless of the effort of the Exorcists to halt the unexplainable phenomenon.

When Allen had asked Komui about it, the man had merely sighed and replied that the priests of the Imperial Palace were investigating it, though not quickly enough to his taste.

"What worries me most is that not only the attacks have been intensifying, but the level of the youkai as well." he had added. "At first, there were no serious damage nor casualties, but for several days, I've been receiving reports of material degradation and some injured people. And all of you Exorcists are completely exhausted at the end of the day, not to mention that you can barely sleep at night too."

Allen wasn't going to contradict the Chinese man. Requests kept arriving at the Temple and the Exorcists had barely time to fulfill one that they already had to go on another request again. The boy couldn't even count the number of hours of sleep he lacked, and the same could be said about Lavi, Lenalee and the other Exorcists as well. Allen wanted to think he was getting used to it, however the tiredness he could sometimes feel in all his limbs kept reminding him that his body was a mere human body that needed rest in order to work properly. It was at those kind of times that he wished he could be like Kanda, who didn't seem to mind sleepless nights.

Right now, Allen was enjoying a rare moment of peace in his room, reading. A glance on the side showed him that Kanda looked asleep, as usual. The boy sighed mentally as he remembered all the time he had spent during the month trying to look for information about his shikigami:

_A day after the meeting with Kanrou, Allen went to see Bookman in his small office at the back of the library. As he saw him, the old man immediately asked:_

"_What can I do for you, this time?"_

"_I uh..." Allen didn't expect the question but replied anyway: "I was wondering if you'd happen to have any document on... Kanda. Any piece of information on who he was before being cursed, what he did, anything. Please." the boy added quickly._

_Bookman silently stared at him during several seconds, then put the paintbrush he was holding on the table and stood up to head for a shelf. There, he took a thin pile of sheets and handed them to Allen:_

"_It took you quite some time to ask me for this, Walker. I thought you'd be more curious. This is the report I had to make for Komui right after you brought that Kanda to the Temple as your shikigami. He had asked me for as many details I could find as possible. Read this, and give it back later."_

_Allen thanked the old man and bowed before leaving._

_..._

_Allen frowned. He had expected not to find much about Kanda, but this was strange. On the report, there were only mentions of a lonesome demon. No clan, no brother, not even another demon that could have had some connection with Kanda. Only tales of destruction, slaughters and havoc, done by a single demon._

_Kanrou's words sounded more and more fake. Yet, they sounded so fake it was suspicious. Kanrou couldn't have thought that Allen was stupid enough to believe everything he had told him without even questioning it, could he? Which meant that there had to be a part of truth somewhere. Moreover, the elapsed time between that era and the present time could also be blamed for the lack of information, there was absolutely no assurance that the data was complete._

_Allen closed his eyes, tired of thinking too much. Nothing was said about any clan, but stories of Kanda's demonic acts were abundant. If the boy had thought that reading the report would have helped him, he was deeply wrong. It had only brought to light that he knew next to nothing about his own shikigami._

The Exorcist glanced at Kanda again. Kanda. Needless to say, their relationship was more than awkward. Since the last time they had slept together, Kanda hadn't touched the boy even once. There was a clear distance setting up between them despite their bond, and Allen was the cause of that distance.

He was the one responsible for the uneasy tension floating around them, since he avoided talking to Kanda as much as possible. Kanrou's words kept playing in Allen's head, and doubt had started instilling into his mind. Despite Kanrou was his enemy, he was at least right on one fact: Kanda was a demon, not a normal shikigami.

It was giving Allen a headache. What would Kanda do after his death? The answer was so obvious and yet, the young Exorcist couldn't bring himself to think about it. An irrational part in him only wanted to believe was different, that such a high-leveled demon couldn't possibly degrade himself by acting like the most primitive creature, only obeying a raw instinct to kill.

"_He longs after power. More than any other demon."_ Allen pinched his lips. What if Kanda's only restraint was the contract that linked a shikigami to an Exorcist? The boy shook his head. It couldn't be. Allen had seen some facets of Kanda's character that couldn't belong to a demon, there were times when Kanda did show something more than a mere duty towards him; they had shared moments of intimacy and had enjoyed them.

Or was the youkai simply playing with Allen? The boy had the feeling that his reflections were always leading him to the same – unanswered – questions; was it better to keep fooling himself by putting his trust in Kanda, or was he supposed to open his eyes and admit the harsh reality that was Kanda's demonic nature? To Allen, it was way easier to pretend the former, but it was more selfish as well.

Therefore, in order for him not to bother about that point any further, he simply avoided any useless contact with Kanda. Was he a coward? Maybe. But one can't blame a fifteen-year-old boy who's already ready to collapse under the pressure of all the recent events to try to lighten his burden.

And strangely enough, it seemed that Kanda wasn't pissing him off like he usually did. The demon merely followed him whenever he had to go on a request, killed youkai if necessary, then remained in the boy's room all the rest of the time, silent. The interactions between them was exactly limited to what Allen had wished for the day he had acquired his shikigami, which meant the bare minimum.

And paradoxically, it was disturbing Allen to no end. He was dying to ask Kanda why he had turned into an almost mute shikigami, while at the same time being apprehensive about starting a conversation. It was absurd, he knew it perfectly, but he couldn't bring himself to act. In a way, he didn't want to take the risk to break the fragile harmony between them by pronouncing the word 'Kanrou'.

_'I don't want to lose him.'_

The thought came to Allen's mind in spite of himself. The boy pinched his lips. No matter what, he didn't want to lose Kanda, he needed him by his side.

Even now, as he was sitting on his futon with a book in his hands, he couldn't help but interrupt his reading and glance every minute at his shikigami who was sitting cross-legged against the wall, eyes closed. Under the long sleeve of his black kimono, Allen knew there was a bracelet made of wooden beads around Kanda's wrist, and he always wondered why his shikigami was keeping it. Not that Allen was going to complain about it, on the contrary, he was secretly glad that Kanda had accepted his present.

At least, for the past month, they hadn't been arguing at all, which it was a great change for Allen. And it wasn't that bad actually, for he could enjoy not having to get irritated whenever he had to confront his shikigami, and he was going to get used to the quietness very quickly.

No, it wasn't that bad after all.

* * *

A figure was sitting on a tree branch, eyes gazing at the far landscape.

"I'm bored." Road said, pouting.

"Me too." Jasdevi replied. He was in his wolf form, lying lazily on the ground under the girl. "How about we raid the Temple to scare those Exorcists scum?" He suggested.

A swarm of black butterflies suddenly appeared from nowhere, and in the middle, another youkai materialized.

"We cannot." Tyki replied with a sigh as he walked to them. "You know the barriers they set around the Temple are good ones, and the Earl wouldn't want us to get injured stupidly."

"Yeah, whatever." the wolf youkai grumbled.

"Anyway, according to the report Lulubell made, youkai attacks have gotten pretty significant and trouble is spreading well around all the country. Actually, it's going on at a quicker pace than what the Earl has originally planned. The spell is working well."

Jasdevi raised his head at those words, and a carnassial smile drew on his lips.

"Let's see how long Kanda is going to last." he said. "I'm looking forward to seeing him lose his mind."

"It's going to take some time with him, he's powerful enough for the spell not to affect him yet."

"I know that." Jasdevi replied, annoyed.

"Uncle Tyki" Road suddenly spoke. "What about Kanda's master? Allen Walker? The Earl has taken an interest in him, right? Do you know why?" she asked.

"My dear Road, if the Earl didn't explain anything, even to you, how do you expect me to know it?" the youkai replied kindly. "All we know is that it is related to the power he's able to draw during battles."

The girl was obviously not satisfied with the answer.

"I wish the Earl would tell me more about what he plans for Walker." she said, almost with a sulky tone. "And I also wish he didn't trust Kanda's twin that much."

Tyki raised an eyebrow.

"Why so? Kanrou is Kanda's enemy. And our clans have always been allied, he seeks revenge, we seek revenge."

"I've got the feeling there's something not right with him, that's all. But it may be my imagination." Road replied, shrugging.

"Don't worry. We're keeping a good watch on him, just to make sure." Tyki reassured her. "Anyway, I have to go check another area to see if the spell is working well." he added before vanishing in the middle of his butterflies.

* * *

Komui frowned at the paper he was reading. It was an official invitation to come as soon as possible to the Imperial Palace, as the seal at the bottom of the page proved it. The reason: it seemed the priests of the Emperor had found something about the recent events, and they required Komui's presence to inform him about their discoveries as well as to allow him to act accordingly.

He looked as tired as ever, wrinkles had formed on his forehead and the rings under his eyes were enough to tell the little sleep he allowed himself to take. He was, to put it simply, overworked. Hundreds of requests were piled up on his desk, and no matter how much he urged the Exorcists to work quickly, it seemed that the piles were never decreasing in size. Also, he was very well aware that the Exorcists weren't going to stand that pace for much longer, which worried him to no end. Hopefully the priests of the Emperor would give him useful information.

The Chinese man sighed.

"Gerudo." he called.

Immediately, a green and small youkai appeared on his table, looking at him with his oversized and protruding eyes and a huge smile. Komui liked thinking his shikigami was a cross between a toad and a lizard: face of a toad, body of a lizard.

"Hey, I almost thought you forgot about me, Komui!" the shikigami exclaimed as it happily jumped on its two back legs. "So, what's going on, what's going on? Tell me, tell me? What can I do for you?"

Komui smiled at his shikigami's excitement.

"Just go find Bookman and tell him to take care of the paperwork for me here until I come back, will you? Also tell him that I'm going to the Palace for important matters."

"Ok!"

And in less than a second, the small youkai slipped down the table and got out of the room, while Komui prepared to leave.

An hour later, a priest was receiving him in the temple of the palace which was considered to be the oldest temple of the country. The priest made Komui cross the huge garden that could perfectly rival the one in the Black Order, before leading him to the small reception room.

"Please have a sit and wait for the head priest to come." he said before slipping away.

Komui sat at the low table and gave a look around him. It wasn't the first time he came here, thus he could tell that the place hadn't changed since the last time he had set foot in it. Sober, the only decoration consisted in two, large paintings of a winter and a spring landscape. The ebony table inlaid with nacre was the only sign of the temple's wealth.

After a minute of waiting, the door was slid open, but it wasn't the head priest, it was a maidservant who was carrying a tray with cups and a teapot. She put the tray on the table, then bowed at Komui before leaving the room. He filled a cup and brought it to his lips. It was amazing how the mere scent of a well-prepared tea could ease any troubled mind, and Komui was no exception to the rule. He sipped at the tea, and let the warmth of the liquid diffuse in him and make him forget – for a short moment – all the recent events.

"Komui, thank you for coming." a voice made him raise his head.

The head priest was a man around fifty years old, bald, with a smooth face and a severe look in his eyes. He sat in front of Komui who nodded at him, poured some tea in his cup before speaking again:

"I'll go straight to the point: we found out what's causing all the youkai attacks in the city." the priest said gravely. "And actually, they aren't occurring only in our area, but I think the whole country is affected. There's a disruption in the global flow of energy that runs through our land. The balance has been lost, and youkai are getting affected by it, the disruption is what is causing them to go berserk and attack people randomly."

"But the Ritual of Purification is supposed to keep the balance, isn't it?" Komui asked, intrigued.

"Indeed. That is why we investigated the items that were used during the Ritual, and we discovered that the protection shield we had put around the box that contained the prayers was breached."

The Chinese man opened his eyes wide.

"Which means that..."

"Which means that someone managed to get access to the prayers and put a spell on them to modify the course of the Ritual. We checked every other item, and the box was the only one to present an anomaly." the priest went on.

"So, what exactly is happening?"

"We made contact with the main temples of the country, and this is the conclusion we came to: on the night of the Ritual, impure prayers were sent to the gods; thus, the energy that surrounds us started getting disrupted because the gods are unsatisfied. And the disruption has been spreading from the capital city to farther regions, which isn't good at all since those regions lack Exorcists. The other temples as well as this one are trying to contain the disruption, but this isn't going to be enough. And that's when we need you, Komui, or rather, your Exorcists." The priest paused, took a sip, then went on: "There's only one way to put things back to normal. As you may know, each of the four main temples of our blessed land were built not far from a high concentration of spiritual energy that acts as a pillar of balance for the whole energy."

"And those pillars don't function properly." Komui said.

"Not exactly. Listen, do you know why the main temples were built next to the pillars?" the priest asked.

"To keep an eye on them, I suppose?" the Chinese man suggested. The priest shook his head.

"Not exactly." he repeated. "Now, I'm going to tell you something that very few people know. Each pillar possesses a guardian."

"A guardian?"

"Our role as a priest is to constantly keep the guardians of each pillar satisfied. But we failed in our mission since the night of the Ritual, and now the guardians are angry and filled with evil. The result is that they neglect their duty to keep the pillars stable."

"Wait. I don't understand who those guardians you speak of are." Komui interrupted him.

"Spirits. Entrusted by our goddess Amaterasu with maintaining the harmony in our land through the pillars. It seems that evil took over them, and the only way to bring them back to normal is to exorcise them."

"Exorcise them?" Komui asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Indeed. I went to the pillar of our temple and I sensed the presence of our guardian. He's possessed by an evil spirit who's controlling him. It is the same for the three other guardians. Your Exorcists need to overpower them, then expel the evil spirit in them. And there's no time to waste. The ritual to summon the guardians out takes several day, and I don't know how long an exorcism can take. The longer we wait, the more youkai will lose control of themselves, and I dare say that even shikigami will be affected sooner or later."

"Shikigami as well?"

"Yes. They are youkai, after all. No matter how strong the link between the shikigami and the master is, if the disruption in the energy flow keeps on worsening, then I can't tell you what will happen."

Komui didn't reply anything at first, busy registering the priest's words. Then:

"I understand. I'll send Exorcists out."

* * *

It was his third request of the day and it was now always the same pattern. Kanda glanced at Allen who was standing next to him and watching the scene in front of him.

"Kill them while I exorcise her." the boy merely said with a weary tone.

The second after, air was filled with shrieks of agonizing youkai and smell of youkai blood as Kanda was killing them, one by one. In the meantime, Allen walked towards a woman who was rolling on the street, screaming, with her eyes rolled upwards. A few other villagers were looking at the scene from far, absolutely terrified by the invasion of youkai. The woman was possessed, and it was Allen's duty as an Exorcist to save her.

A youkai attempted to jump on him from the roof of one of the houses, but before it could even touch him, a blade cleanly cut it in two and the two parts fell on the ground with a thud, next to Allen's feet.

"Che, pay attention, Moyashi." Kanda addressed the boy with arrogance.

"Why should I?" the young Exorcist replied calmly. "You're supposed to protect me. And your job isn't done, so get back to work. And my name's Allen."

"Don't order me around, _Moyashi_." Kanda snapped as he went back to finish off his slaughter.

Allen merely shrugged and walked towards the woman who was now trying to strangle herself in her madness. The boy pulled a seal out of his sleeve, then traced a five-branch star in the air with his fingers, threw the seal at the woman and pronounced an incantation. The woman screamed even louder, her body shaken by spasms, and Allen couldn't see from the corner of his eyes one of the villagers who was about to run to her, panicked, but another one prevented him from doing it.

"But he's going to kill her! Is he even an Exorcist?" Allen heard him exclaim.

They were scared that Allen was going to kill her? The boy shook his head and sighed. Sometimes, he tended to forget that his white hair and the scar on his face were the reasons why people kept thinking he was a demon, and having a real demon serving him didn't help refute that idea. Never mind. He was carrying out his duty, regardless of what other people could think of him. His eyes directed at the woman again. With satisfaction, he saw the spirit that possessed her being expelled from her body and pronounced another incantation which made the spirit explode in the air. The request was fulfilled.

Allen turned to Kanda to see if his shikigami was done, which he was. The latter was walking to him, oblivious to the petrified looks he was receiving from the villagers. Among them, a man gulped before gathering enough courage to go to Allen, a purse in his hand.

"T-This is the payment. T-Thank you for saving my sister." he stuttered as he handed it to the boy.

"It was what you requested." Allen replied casually. "It's only normal. You should go take care of her now."

"Y-yes, sir Exorcist." the man said before bowing quickly and going to attend to his sister who was still lying on the ground, unconscious.

Allen started walking away, followed by Kanda, when he heard a villager calling him:

"T-Thank you saving us!"

The boy turned round, looked at the man who had talked and replied with a smile:

"Please don't force yourself. I don't like hypocrites and I don't need thanks from people who thought I was going to kill her." Then, before the other man had time to reply anything, he left the village.

As he and Kanda were silently walking back to the Temple, the demon suddenly spoke:

"You're a liar."

Allen glanced at him and raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything.

"If you don't like hypocrites, then why did you give them that fake smile of yours?" Kanda sneered. Again, Allen remained silent, thinking. Then, after a few seconds, he finally answered:

"Don't make me laugh. A demon like you can't possibly make out a real smile from a fake one."

Strangely enough, the said demon merely gave Allen a disdainful look, choosing not to answer. None of them pronounced a word until they came back to the Temple. To them, it was now normal to have such limited conversations, as if they were strangers to each other. Yet, it was also as if a few sentences was enough to express themselves and make the other implicitly understand the real meaning of their words. It was as if their bond was enough for them not to use words.

However, this wasn't Allen's opinion at all. To him, Kanda had to serve him as his shikigami, and it didn't go any further. It was the best way for him not to torture his mind too much about who Kanda really was, about the past he never wanted to talk about, and it allowed the boy not to wonder too much about whether he had to believe Kanrou or not. It was as simple as that. In a way, he could pretend to lead a normal life, as a normal Exorcist, and it wasn't that bad.

As soon as Allen arrived at the Temple, he headed for Komui's office but got the surprise to see the old Bookman sitting at table instead.

"Hm, excuse me, isn't Komui-san here?" he asked.

"He's away for now. I'm the one in charge until he comes back." Bookman replied.

"I've come back from my latest request. Here's the payment." Allen went on as he put the purse on the table. "When will he come back?"

"In an hour or two, I think."

"Which request shall I take next, then?"

"None for now. A mere glance at you shows me that you need some sleep. Walker, I didn't have the opportunity to ask you this before: how is your research about curses related to the Earl?" the old man asked abruptly.

Though not expecting the question, Allen managed to keep his composure while remaining silent for a few seconds. As he was trying to find a decent answer, he got the surprise to see Kanda stepping next to him and declare coldly:

"This is none of your business. It concerns the moyashi and I only."

Bookman stared at the black-haired youkai who easily bore his stare with an equal intensity. In the end, it was the old man who gave up first.

"Very well. You may leave, Walker." he merely said before getting back to his paperwork, not paying the least bit of attention to them any more.

Allen bowed deeply before quickly leaving the room, followed by his shikigami. As soon as they were out, the latter addressed the boy:

"I expected you to react just now."

"Why would I? You answered for me." Allen replied as if it was obvious.

"You haven't been acting like your usual self for a month, Moyashi." Kanda remarked.

"Please don't talk as if you know my usual self." Allen replied, remembering that Kanda had pronounced similar words not so long ago. "And don't call me that."

"Che."

No further words were exchanged as they went back to Allen's room, in which the boy allowed himself to take a nap; it was rare to be allowed such luxury given the incredibly huge amount of requests. He stretched his tired limbs and fell asleep immediately, completely oblivious of Kanda's piercing gaze on him.

It was only when a loud bang was heard about two hours after that Allen woke up with a start.

"What was that?" he asked Kanda who hadn't moved a single finger.

"Like I'd know." he replied as he got up reluctantly.

Allen got out of his futon and quickly exited his room, followed by his shikigami, to look for the source of the noise. There were also several other people who were running towards the Temple's entrance, visibly as surprised as him by the bang; and among them, Komui. Then, a loud scream rose. Immediately, everyone rushed towards the direction of the scream, including Allen. He noticed smoke rising in the air and prayed that a fire hadn't started in the Temple. However, as he arrived on the premises, what he saw wasn't what he had expected at all.

In front of the Temple's entrance, several craters were covering the ground, and Lenalee was in fighting stance, though on her face, only confusion and bewilderment were displayed. As Allen looked at her opponent in front of her, his eyes opened wide.

"Makura! What's happening to you?" Lenalee addressed her dragonfly shikigami which was holding a spear, ready to attack her. "Makura! Answer me!"

"I want freedom." the shikigami merely replied before rushing at the girl, weapon directed at her.

"Lenalee!" Komui called along with some of the people who came with him.

The girl was quick enough to dodge the attack, and she asked again, with a desperate tone:

"Makura, please tell me what's wrong!"

"I told you. I want freedom."

"Lenalee! A barrier! Erect a barrier around Makura!" Allen shouted at her.

"No!" the girl replied. "Makura's going to hurt herself if she tries to escape!"

The shikigami attacked again, but at the last second, Lenalee summoned another of her shikigami which blocked the attack.

"Shika! Please reason with Makura! I don't understand what's gotten into her!" she pleaded.

The huge mantis nodded, visibly as confused as the girl by the other shikigami's behaviour. Meanwhile, Allen was watching the scene, struggling with himself in order to decide what to do. He didn't want to intervene for fear of hurting Makura while thinking that he couldn't remain there and watch the shikigami trying to kill its master. He turned to Kanda:

"Kanda, do you know what's happening? Can you do something to stop Makura without hurting her?" he urged him. The youkai was frowning, silent, which irritated Allen who tugged several times on his sleeve: "Kanda!"

Kanda turned his dark blue eyes to Allen and replied coldly:

"It's too late. That shikigami's already dead."

Allen stared at him incredulously.

"What are you talking about? Makura isn't..."

"Just shut up and look." Kanda cut him sharply.

As Allen looked back at the scene, words failed to come to him. Makura was squirming about on the ground, letting piercing shrieks out, obviously seized by acute pain. Not far from the shikigami, Lenalee kept calling "Makura, Makura!" desperately while Komui was holding the girl firmly to prevent her from running to Makura. The shikigami's breathing was erratic, its whole body shaking with spasms, giving a pitiful view of the creature.

"Le...na...lee..." it managed to articulate. "I'm...sorry..."

And then, under Allen's astounded gaze, the shikigami's body started vanishing slowly into tiny particles and disappeared completely. During those several seconds, it seemed to Lenalee that time had frozen, except for her shikigami. No one moved, nor spoke, all staring at the scene, stunned, as if it was too unreal to be true. With one last scream, the girl freed herself from her brother's arms and ran to the place where Makura was lying a few seconds ago, but which was now a bare, naked ground.

"Makura!!!!!"

She fell on her knees, letting tears flow abundantly on her cheeks, staring at the ground incredulously. Several people as well as Shika gathered behind her in an attempt at comforting her, though they failed miserably. Komui knelt down besides her and pulled her against him, patting her back despite he knew how futile his gesture was right now.

Lenalee had just lost one of her precious shikigami, and everyone who knew the girl knew how dear they were to her.

Allen was the only one who hadn't moved, choosing to remain aside. The sight was heart-rending, especially as he couldn't grasp entirely what had happened, nor why it had happened. He was simply staring, as his friend was drowning in her tears, inconsolable, and repeating over and over again the name of her shikigami.

"Do you plan to take root here?" an annoyed voice abruptly brought him back to reality. Of course, the only one who was insensitive enough not to care about other people's feelings was Kanda.

The boy turned to Kanda, at a loss:

"What happened?" he asked with a flinching voice. "What was... Why..."

"Che. That stupid shikigami rebelled against its master, that's what happened." Kanda replied bluntly.

"What do you mean?" Allen insisted.

"Exactly what I said."

"Explain to me clearly what happened to Makura!" Allen raised his voice.

"Oh? So now the moyashi suddenly wants me to talk with him after a whole month of ignoring me?" Kanda sneered.

At those words, Allen stiffened, then frowned. He wasn't going to be lead by his own shikigami like that.

"Answer me." he ordered, which pretty irritated Kanda.

"You stupid brat." he snapped as he turned round and started walking back inside the Temple.

"Kanda!" Allen called him as he quickly caught up with him. "Answer me! What happened to Makura?"

"Answer the question by yourself, you idiot." Kanda replied dryly as he kept walking towards Allen's room. The boy frowned, not understanding what his shikigami meant. Noticing it, the latter clicked his tongue out of irritation.

"Tell me the main rule for a shikigami." he let out dryly.

"The main rule? Well, they have to serve their master faithfully and are forbidden to use their powers on..." Allen froze on the spot as realization struck him. "Kanda..." he called his shikigami's name, lowering his tone. "I've never been told what happens to a shikigami that breaks the rule."

"Then now you have the answer." Kanda replied on the same dry tone as he pulled the panel of Allen's room open and stepped in.

"B-but why did Makura do that?" Allen asked with a trembling voice, completely at a loss. "Didn't she know that..."

"Why are you even here?" the youkai cut him sharply. "Aren't you supposed to be by that girl's side instead of having a useless talk with me?"

Again, Kanda's icy words took Allen by surprise.

"I-I..." Any retort died in the boy's throat, as he couldn't find anything sensible to retort. It was true that he had never been the kind of person to leave his closest friend behind in such a distraught state; yet it was exactly what was happening. Guilt seized Allen, and the boy bit his lip as he couldn't understand how he could have left Lenalee without even one word for her. She had just lost a shikigami under unclear circumstances and she needed as much support as possible.

Without wasting another second, the boy turned round and ran back towards the Temple's entrance. On his way, however, he met with Komui and the other people who were bringing Lenalee back inside. A teacher he recognized to be Cloud Nine had joined them, and was trying to calm the Chinese girl down, though unsuccessfully. Lenalee had her face hidden in both her hands, still sobbing and shedding tears endlessly. Seeing that, Allen wondered once again how in heaven he could have chosen to follow Kanda instead of going to her.

It was Kanda's fault. He was the one who continuously led Allen astray, who made him progressively change his personality. Was it childish to put the blame on Kanda? Maybe. But now, this was the last of Allen's concerns. He ran towards the groups of people, determined not to let his shikigami affect him any further.

Meanwhile, a black-haired youkai was standing outside, his back leaning against the wall next to Allen's room, arms crossed, eyes watching the scene from far.

"Che, stupid Moyashi. As always." he said before getting into the room and pulling the door shut behind him.

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Frustrated by the end of the chapter? Well, Allen and Kanda's relationship can't go on that smoothly, can it? Otherwise it'd be too easy haha :D Oh well, I hope you appreciated the chapter anyway! I'm gonna try my best to update asap, but next week I won't have my computer with me (which doesn't mean I won't be writing) **Merry Chrismas to all of you!**


	17. Acceptance

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

A/N: I totally forgot to mention it in my last chapter, but **a1y-puff** was kind enough to gift me with a very nice picture based on Shikigami. The link is in my profile, please go check it! And sorry for mentioning it only now!

* * *

**Chapter 17 - Acceptance  
**

Confusion was reigning inside the Temple after the unexpected death of Lenalee's shikigami. A day after it had occurred, Komui gathered all the Exorcists – except his sister – and the teachers to inform them about what the head priest had told him at the palace. Needless to say, the Chinese man looked as drained as ever, and the sleepless night he had spent trying to comfort Lenalee was clearly displaying on his tired face. In front of him, the Exorcists weren't in a better state because of the overflow of exorcism requests they had been filling for over a month.

After Komui was done explaining, the room was filled with a heavy silence for several seconds before Cloud Nine finally spoke:

"To sum it up, you're trying to tell us that our shikigami could suddenly go berserk and attack us, then die because they broke the contract binding them to us."

"And to prevent it from happening, we have to go find some unknown guardians of some invisible pillars of energy and exorcise them." one of the Exorcists added gloomily.

"Indeed." Komui replied, sighing. "If we want to avoid a new tragedy like yesterday, we have to stop the disruption in the energy flow."

"How is Lenalee doing?" Allen inquired, earning a new sigh from Komui.

"Not very well, I fear. She doesn't seem to realize that her shikigami is gone, nor does she want to believe that Makura attacked her."

No one could find anything to reply, all of them were wearing a downcast look as it was the first time in ages since a shikigami had rebelled against its master. But what made it more cruel this time was the fact that Makura hadn't even acted on its own will.

"Then, what are we waiting for?" Lavi asked, trying more or less successfully not to let himself be overwhelmed by the current mood. "If the only thing we need to do is to exorcise, then it should be easy. We're running out of time so I think we'll have to split."

"But while we'll be gone, there will be no one to take care of the youkai attacks here." Miranda said as she looked towards the hundreds of requests that were piling up on Komui's table.

"That's why some of you will stay here. Including the teachers, there are fourteen Exorcists – I'm not counting Cross in since we can't get in touch with him, as usual." Komui explained. "But there's one last thing I need to tell you. As I said before, the head priest is almost certain that an intruder – most likely a demon – managed to break the shield that protected the prayers for the Ritual of Purification. The odds are high that the demon was part of the Earl's underlings."

At those words, murmurs started rising among the gathered people, the Exorcists talking among themselves worriedly while the teachers frowned pensively. Allen was the only one who didn't react, suddenly deep in thought.

"The Earl?" Tiedoll intervened. "Well, it's not that surprising, indeed. However, we need to find out what the Earl's purpose is."

And then, it clicked in Allen's mind. The words Lulubell had pronounced on the night of the Festival came back to him, and slowly, he started putting the pieces together. _'Youkai who serve under humans are traitors'_, _'Humans need to be reminded that they have no power over us'._

"I think I have an idea about his purpose." Allen announced after a moment, loud enough to stop the chatter. All faces turned to the boy, intrigued. "Actually, I think that the Earl wants to free every youkai from us human beings. He regards us as unworthy of possessing shikigami, and I also think that he wants youkai to take over."

"What makes you say that?" Komui inquired.

"Well I..." Allen paused, unsure of what to say. Kanda had forbidden him to tell anyone about that meeting, yet he felt that keeping such a secret was now pointless. The current situation was too serious and the encounter with Lulubell did concern everyone. He could simply keep silent about Kanda's twin. "I met one of the youkai that works for the Earl on the first night of the Festival and..."

"You what!" Lavi exclaimed while several other Exorcists frowned. "Why didn't you tell us earlier?"

"Lavi, please calm down and let Allen explain himself." Komui cut him gravely before turning his eyes to Allen.

The silver-haired boy let out a small sigh , then resumed talking:

"She told me that the Earl wants to give our land back to youkai, and that he has a plan to make it happen."

"This is serious, Allen. Very serious. Why did keep for yourself such important information?" Komui asked, though he tried not to sound too strict.

Allen bit his lip. He decided to tell the truth, because it was the best thing to do at the moment.

"Because Kanda asked me to." he said firmly. "He asked me not to tell anyone because he thought it had nothing to do with anyone else but him, and at that time, I agreed with him."

At that time, Allen didn't have enough guts to upset his shikigami, and today, he was ready to take the blame for it. After all, it was his own fault for lacking authority towards his own shikigami. However, Komui's answer wasn't the one he expected:

"I see." he said after a moment of silence. "However, you need to understand that we are going through a crisis, and it's essential for us to have as much information as possible. In the future, please try to take this into consideration."

Allen nodded, partly relieved that Komui wasn't angry at him, though he could clearly feel the frowns and suspicious looks on the other people's faces.

* * *

The meeting was over after half an hour, to Allen's relief, for he had felt the tension rising after revealing his encounter with the enemy, especially among the Exorcists he usually never talked to. For some reason, he was ready to bet that they'd avoid him even more from now on. During the meeting, Komui had assigned each person to a specific task, and it had been agreed that Allen would be staying at the capital city to fulfill requests. The boy had protested, of course, but for some reason, even the teachers wanted him to stay here, which didn't particularly pleased him.

Now, Allen was on his way back to his room when he stopped abruptly and turned round, then raised his eyes to the roof of one of the buildings where his shikigami was sitting, watching him. The said shikigami smirked before jumping on the ground and walking to Allen.

"You're good at sensing my presence now, Moyashi." he commented.

"I suppose I am." Allen merely replied as he resumed walking back to his room, followed by Kanda.

Several seconds passed before the young Exorcist spoke again:

"I told the others that we met Lulubell on the night of the Festival, and about the Earl's plan. Komui said that..."

"I know that." Kanda cut sharply. Then, as he didn't add anything else, Allen raised an eyebrow:

"Did you listen to the whole meeting?" he asked, but didn't get any answer but a mere shrug from Kanda. "Aren't you angry that I told them?" he asked casually.

"I'm not the one to decide what you should say or not." the youkai replied icily, which surprised Allen a bit.

Their relationship had been stagnating for a month, not worsening nor getting better, and Allen couldn't tell whether he was supposed to rejoice about that fact or not. He still hadn't set up his mind about what to think of Kanda; every day he kept imagining what would happen after his death, would Kanda start killing off freely as his reputation said? Would he simply retire and... and what? Allen couldn't picture in his head his shikigami leading a peaceful life among other human beings, and naturally, it led him to wonder once again Kanrou's offer.

Kanda's twin wanted to kill him to avenge the massacre of his clan, yet Allen couldn't bring himself to put his faith into the words of a demon who was working for the Earl. And supposing that Kanrou actually managed to kill his brother – the thought made Allen shiver – nothing prevented him from attacking humans as well afterwards. Even now, the demon could be slaying a few people here and there for fun, or on the Earl's orders. It was making Allen sick.

However, the worst part of all was that he couldn't get rid of his attachment to his shikigami, despite his cold behaviour towards him. It was an endless conflict between his heart that was prompting him to stop his pointless attitude and give in to Kanda, and his common sense that was telling him not to fool himself any further with the youkai, no matter how close they got together. And gods, it was hardly possible for them to get any closer after what they had done twice.

"Oi, where are you going?" Allen heard his shikigami ask him. He turned round and noticed that he had walked past his room, too lost in his thoughts. The boy mentally shook his head and walked back, but then, as he slid the panel of his room open, Kanda started walking away.

"And where are _you_ going?" Allen asked in return.

"I've just decided I don't feel like spending my time with a brat who's incapable of making up his mind." Kanda replied icily.

The reply took Allen by surprise. How could his shikigami read so accurately in him? Not even his closest friends could guess his state of mind, and yet, a demon could. Kanda could.

Allen suddenly felt his heart clench and grabbed the youkai's wrist before his brain even recorded the gesture. Kanda's last mere words had clicked something in the boy's head, something that was telling him to give up his constant inner struggle.

For once, he thought, he could afford being selfish and act like he truly wished to, regardless of any common sense and whatnot on how horrible it was for demons to kill people. For once, he'd forget the many doubts he harboured towards Kanda, and would only remember the feeling of protection that emanated from his shikigami whenever he needed it. And it was vain to assert he didn't need it now.

Allen raised his eyes to his shikigami who was looking at him silently and impassively, as if he had expected the boy to stop him from walking away.

"Kanda, please. I'd like to talk to you." Allen requested. His tone wasn't pleading, it was more as if he had refrained from a long time and had decided to let himself out. Which wasn't wrong.

"Che. Fine." Kanda replied. "But you're coming with me." he added as he resumed walking away.

"Where to?" the boy asked, intrigued but following Kanda anyway.

"The forest."

"Why?"

"I'm getting tired of remaining stuck in your room."

Allen raised an eyebrow, then a faint smile appeared on his lips.

"So you do happen to have walks outside." he commented, though he didn't receive any answer.

They walked for half an hour in the forest, none of them talking. Allen was simply walking and gazing around him; winter had reached its end and the temperature was cool enough for birds to start reappearing again, filling the forest with pleasant and musical notes. Next to him, Kanda wasn't showing any sign of enjoying the sight of a reviving nature, then again, Kanda never showed any sign of enjoying anything.

"Didn't you say you wanted to talk to me?" he asked abruptly, snatching Allen from his contemplation.

"Ah, yes I did." The boy paused a second to gather his courage before resuming: "I met your brother a month ago." he declared bluntly, fully prepared for the storm that was coming. He didn't have to wait too long.

As soon as Allen pronounced those words, Kanda stopped dead and the second after, he was pinning the boy by the neck against the nearest tree, cold fury blazing in his eyes.

"Explanations." he ordered icily, trying to control the anger in his voice.

"Release me first." Allen replied on an equal tone, though with some difficulty since he could barely breathe.

They stared at each other, Allen not flinching despite the lack of air, and slowly, very slowly, Kanda loosened his grip on the boy's neck but didn't let him go completely. He acknowledged that the moyashi was showing some guts, at least.

"I said to release me first, Kanda." Allen repeated on a cooler tone. Too many guts, actually.

"Why didn't you call me back then? Did you think you could handle him alone? What if something had happened to you?" Kanda's icy tone almost made Allen shiver, but the latter managed to remain composed.

"I couldn't call you because you were too far. No, I didn't think I could handle him alone. And nothing happened to me, as you can see. Release me now or I won't say anything else." the boy replied.

He could feel Kanda's slightly shaking hand against his neck being slowly removed from him, though his shikigami's glare was enough to paralyse anyone who wasn't used to it.

Allen rested against the tree, massaging his neck while Kanda was waiting, arms crossed, and visibly not in the mood to wait indefinitely for the boy to speak. The latter decided not to play with Kanda's patience any longer and resumed talking:

"He told me to let him kill you. He told me about your clan, Kanda, and he wants revenge for it." Allen didn't miss the glint of surprise in his shikigami's eyes though the latter remained silent. He went on: "If I have avoided you lately, it's because I couldn't decide whether to trust you or not. You keep telling me that after my death, you'll act however you please, you'll turn back to your true self and start killing again, but I can't bring myself to believe it. Still, I'm very well aware that you are a demon and that's part of you to kill, and that's why Kanrou offered me to get rid of you, for the sake of us humans, and to avenge his clan. Your clan." Allen added with a lower voice.

The boy looked at his shikigami and got the surprise to see a smirk slowly appearing on his lips.

"Our clan, huh?" the youkai sneered. Then he went on with obvious contempt in his voice: "I don't have any clan. I never had any."

Allen frowned, then remembered that there was indeed no mention of any clan which Kanda could have belonged to in Bookman's report. However, he needed to make sure it wasn't a mere coincidence.

"What do you mean? Kanrou told me that you killed everyone in your clan because... because of..."

"Because of what?" the youkai asked, irritated. "What did that bastard tell you exactly?"

Allen let out a sigh. The difficult part was coming. He took a deep breath in and got going. He told Kanda the whole conversation – if that could be called a conversation – he had had with Kanrou, not forgetting a single detail on the description of Kanda he had been given: his inordinate adoration for power, his thirst for blood, his vile nature hidden behind a mask of coldness, that mask which would fall apart as soon as he wasn't bound to Allen any more.

During his speech, the boy noticed the impassiveness with which Kanda was looking at him, not reacting the slightest bit at Allen's words, barely moving, which didn't reassure the Exorcist at all. Kanda's attitude was abnormal, which was beginning to worry Allen as he expected his shikigami to burst out at any moment. When he was done talking, Kanda was still staring at him silently with what could only be disdain. Needless to say, Allen's heart was pounding hard in his chest, and for a second he wondered what had gotten into him to finally spill everything out.

His eyes didn't left Kanda at any second as the latter slowly walked towards him, and he started panicking inwardly, though not a single feature on his face showed it. Kanda was now only a few inches away from him, and Allen prepared himself for whatever was coming next.

What he didn't expect was that Kanda merely leant his hand on the trunk of the tree, right next to Allen's head while his other hand lifted the boy's chin.

"Don't tell me you were surprised by what Kanrou revealed you about me." he said with a smirk.

"I..." Kanda's last sentence caught Allen unawares. Was he implying that everything his twin had said was true? The boy didn't want to believe it. Maybe, in a corner of his mind, he had expected Kanda to convince him that everything was a lie. Maybe... Allen looked away though he couldn't turn his head as Kanda's hand was preventing him from doing so.

"It's not like that." he said softly. "It's just that I thought you could give me your own explanation. He said you had a clan while you're claiming the opposite, so..."

"There's nothing to explain. I don't care about what that bastard says about me. And I don't care about what you can think about me. Yes, I'm a demon. Yes, killing is in my blood. And I like it. If you're not happy with it, then go blame your ancestor." Kanda replied dryly.

Allen turned his eyes back to Kanda, and he felt his cheeks warming up at the closeness of their faces. At the same time, he felt hurt by his shikigami's words; of course Kanda didn't care, but hearing him claim bluntly his love for killing was a hard blow towards the expectations he had for Kanda.

"Why can't I get to know more about you?" he asked with a weary tone. "Why is it always so difficult with you? Why..."

"Shut up." Kanda cut him. "You're the one who makes things difficult with your stubbornness. You're the one who wants to keep a distance with me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining or anything. Actually I don't give a damn about how you act towards me, but don't go saying I'm the one at fault for your own stupidity." he declared in one breath.

"Don't change the subject, Kanda. I..." Allen started but was soon cut off when lips roughly closed on his and an arm slipped around his waist. He remained wide-eyed during several seconds before registering what was happening. His defences crumbled apart in no time. He slowly closed his eyes and almost instinctively wrapped his arms around Kanda's neck, forgetting for a moment every question he had about his shikigami.

_You don't give a damn about how I act towards you, yet you do this to me._

Allen couldn't help but wonder how much the part of truth in Kanda's words was. However, his silent question was soon erased by the relentlessness with which Kanda was devouring him, and he found himself unable to focus on anything else but the demon's hot breath on his skin that was making his head spin.

It had been a month since he had last tasted the sensation of a tongue running on his lips, then claiming entrance and invading his mouth, eliciting soft whimpers from him, and he wondered how come he hadn't got addicted to it yet, because it _was_ addictive. He pressed himself against his shikigami, leaving behind any pointless inner struggle about right or not right. Instead, he gave in to the long, burning and eager kiss – especially from Allen's part, as if his body was feeding on that kiss after being deprived for too long.

Kanda finally pulled back and looked at the boy who leant his forehead against his chest, trying to get his breath back.

"The only thing you need to know about me is that I can't afford any youkai to lay a hand on you." he ended the conversation. "The rest doesn't matter."

Allen pulled away, not replying. He wanted to give Kanda's words the meaning that was likely the less probable, he wanted to think that Kanda was offering to protect him of his own will, not because he was forced to. Yet he didn't want to content himself with such an offer, and one way or another, he'd bring Kanda to tell him the truth on his past, for he was now willing to believe that what Kanrou had stated was nothing but lies. Where did that will come from? He didn't know. He simply wanted to trust someone, and the one he chose was Kanda. It was as easy as that.

It was at the same moment that he heard a noise coming from behind Kanda, and the second after, a large, wild youkai jumped out from behind the trees and landed on its four legs a few meters away from them, baring his fangs. Allen frowned but reacted quickly; he was getting used to this now.

In less than a minute, the youkai was disposed of. Meanwhile, Kanda merely watched, as Allen was done exorcising and sighed deeply.

"This will never stop." he commented. "And that one wasn't a weak one." he added. "I hope it won't take too long before we can exorcise those guardians or whatever they are. Let's go back, Kanda. Komui may need me for a request."

"Moyashi." Kanda suddenly called.

"It's Allen, Bakanda."

"How come my brother didn't try to kill you?" the youkai asked, ignoring Allen's remark and taking the boy off guard as he was clearly not expecting the question. After a few seconds, he replied:

"Ah, about that..." he tried to remember. "Well, Kanrou said that the Earl ordered him not to kill me. He didn't know why though."

Kanda frowned pensively at those words but remained silent.

"Never mind. Let's go." he merely said after a while.

Both of them started heading back to the Temple; they were walking next to each other and – involuntarily or not – Allen's hand was brushing Kanda's at each step, and curiously enough, the demon didn't seem to mind it that much.

Then, after several minutes, the young Exorcist stopped abruptly, head lowered.

"Hey, Kanda." he called with a strangely trembling voice.

The youkai stopped as well and turned his head on the side to the boy standing there, immobile, face shadowed by white locks of hair.

"What?" he asked, slightly annoyed.

"You..." Allen started with a faint uncertainty. "You'll stay by my side, right?"

Needless to say, Kanda couldn't help but frown at the question and turned round to face the boy.

"What do you mean?" he asked back.

"You... There's no way you're going to attack me like Makura did with Lenalee, right?" The words spurted out of Allen's mouth as he raised his head to Kanda and directed his gaze straight at his shikigami. In those opaline eyes was reflected a mixture of worry, fear... and expectation. "You're not going to disappear on me any time soon, are you?" he insisted as he grabbed Kanda by his kimono with both his hands. "Because I won't forgive you if you do, and I'll..."

"Stupid Moyashi." Kanda cut him sharply. He then rested a hand in Allen's colourless hair. "Don't put me on the same level as those weak youkai. I'm not going to lose control of myself so easily."

Allen lowered his head again, then nodded slowly, partly reassured by those few words. Kanda withdrew his hand and started walking back.

"And in any case, if I were to attack you, you wouldn't have to bother about forgiving me since you'd be dead." he added with a smirk.

"Bakanda!" Allen snapped back, though deep inside, he knew he wouldn't mind dying by Kanda's hand. The thought surprised him for a second, but soon after, a sad smile appeared on his lips.

The truth was that he couldn't imagine living without his shikigami by his side any more. His feelings for Kanda were now deeply carved within him, and he was finally accepting them entirely. At the same moment, he felt as if a huge burden had been removed from his shoulders. Acceptance. It was as simple as that.

* * *

"Earl, some Exorcists have started dispatching. It seems they are heading for the main temples of the country to exorcise the guardians." Tyki reported.

A broad, eerie smirk appeared on the Earl's lips.

"So they think they finally found out the source of the youkai attacks, don't they? Very well, let them be. They'll notice their mistake soon enough." the demon commented.

"Earl, this is a good opportunity for us to get rid of them, I suggest you order some of us to take care of the Exorcists. Jasdevi, for instance, has been in a very foul mood lately because he's bored, and I have to admit most of us don't like waiting inactively." Tyki explained.

"Is that so?" the Earl raised an eyebrow. "Is Allen Walker part of the dispatched Exorcists?"

"No, it seems the Temple wants to keep him and Kanda here."

The Earl's smirk broadened.

"In that case, you are free to do however you want. I don't want my dear children to be deprived of some entertainments." he replied sweetly.

* * *

Several days had passed since Komui had sent the Exorcists to the main temples. It would take them about a week to get to their destination, then another couple of days to summon the guardians and an undefined time to exorcise them. Lavi was one of them, though he had asked to remain at the capital mainly to keep company to Lenalee.

The girl was locked in her room most of the time, and the few times Allen had come to visit her, the only thing he could see was the girl's dull eyes that used to twinkle with life. Lenalee barely talked, despite the effort of her other shikigami to comfort her. Allen never knew what to say whenever he came to see her; in the end he would merely sit beside her and pat her back while saying she'd get over it soon enough.

On that afternoon, the female Exorcist asked him with a weary tone:

"Would you be able to get over it if Kanda tried to attack you and died right after under your eyes while you wouldn't be able to do anything to save him?" And before Allen even had to reply, she added bitterly while forcing a laugh: "Oh, I'm so silly. Of course you would, since you don't like your shikigami."

At that moment, Allen couldn't find any word to answer her and left the room after giving her an apology. Outside, Kanda was waiting for him, leaning against the wall as usual. Allen sighed:

"She isn't getting any better. I don't know what to do for her. And Lavi isn't supposed to come back before weeks. He would know what to do."

"Che. All this trouble over a single shikigami. Humans are stupid." the youkai commented.

"Kanda! You don't understand!" Allen snapped, then murmured, almost to himself: "You really can't understand... If it had been you, I... I'd have..." He bit his lip, trying not to think about the possibility. On a lighter tone, he went on: "Anyway, I need to go see Komui. He hasn't given me any request today."

Kanda merely shrugged, then followed the boy to Komui's office. On their way there, the youkai spoke:

"You've been looked at in a rather suspicious way, lately."

Allen didn't reply. Indeed, since the last meeting with all the Exorcists and the teachers, rumours had been spreading that he had some shady connections with some demons that were supposed to be enemies, that Kanda was influencing him to betray the Temple, whispers had been running among the students that Allen was finally revealing his true nature, that it was obvious from the start that he had some demonic blood flowing in his veins, his abnormal hair colour and that ugly scar on his face were evidence enough.

He was used to hearing whispers on his back and receiving dubious glances whenever he showed his face, may it be inside the Temple or outside, during requests. Now however, the tension had increased by several folds and most people in the Temple clearly avoided him.

"Oi." the voice of his shikigami brought Allen's attention back.

"Yes, I know. It's not like I can help it. I don't care anyway." Allen replied casually.

They arrived at Komui's office and found the man as busy as ever in the middle of his paperwork. He raised his eyes to Allen as soon as he heard the boy entering and greeted him with a tired smile:

"Oh, hello Allen, Kanda. Can I help you?"

"Actually, I was wondering why you've been giving me less requests than usual these past few days. I thought that with more than half the Exorcists gone, I'd have been busier." Allen explained.

"Ah well, you see, I thought I'd force some rest on you since you never seem to complain about the workload. It's not healthy to exhaust yourself on requests, Allen." Komui replied kindly, though Allen thought he heard a hint of embarrassment in the man's tone.

"But I'm feeling fine, and there are many requests waiting there. People are getting attacked by youkai while I'm here doing nothing." Allen slightly raised his voice.

"Daisya and Miranda are taking care of the requests. When one of them comes back, I'll send you out, ok?"

"But..."

"Allen, I know you're concerned about the attacks, and so am I. But my duty isn't only to send you on requests, it's also to make sure you're in a good shape enough to fill them. You understand?" Komui asked with a firm voice.

Allen wanted to reply, but he knew it was useless against Komui, so he merely nodded.

"Fine. Sorry for disturbing you." he said as he bowed, then exited the office, followed by Kanda.

The boy pondered what to do to kill time and chose to take a rest in the garden. In this early spring, flowers had started blooming again and the small ponds were no more frozen, allowing people to gaze at the fish lazing in the water. Surely Allen wouldn't be alone in the garden, but he needed fresh air, and it wasn't inside his room that he was going to get some.

"Kanda, are you coming with me to the garden?" he asked his shikigami. The latter nodded and followed Allen to the white pine under which the boy sat, back leant against the trunk. Kanda stood next to him, arms crossed and glanced at Allen.

"He lied to you." he said.

The boy raised his head to Kanda, intrigued.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

"Your superior. He lied to you." Kanda repeated.

"About what?"

"Forcing you to rest was a mere excuse to prevent you from letting you out too often."

"I don't understand what you're saying, Kanda." the boy replied truthfully.

"Che. You're more stupid than I thought." the youkai sneered. "Your superior wants to keep an eye on you, that's why he tries to keep you here."

"Keep an eye on me? I didn't do anything wrong." Allen retorted, more and more surprised.

"Idiot. Since the day you told him you met with Lulubell, he's been more cautious on you. It was so obvious I wonder how you didn't notice it."

"This is Komui we're talking about." Allen replied dryly. "He's not like that. He's not like all the others who think I'm a youkai in disguise or something like that."

"Che. Believe what you want, but the reality is that everyone is suspicious of you, on a more or less serious degree."

The boy kept silent. If what Kanda had said was true, then Allen couldn't blame Komui for taking some precautions, even if it hurt him a bit to admit that even his superior didn't trust him completely. And then, before he even thought of it, his mouth opened and words came out of their own will:

"I don't care, as long as I have you."

At the statement, Kanda turned his gaze to Allen and a faint smirk appeared on his face. The boy had pressed a hand over his mouth, too stunned by his own words, and was now blushing in spite of himself.

"I... I mean, huh..." the embarrassed boy started stuttering.

"Exactly what you said." Kanda finished for him.

With those few words, everything was said: recognition, acceptance. Their silent and mutual understanding was more than enough for them.

Neither Kanda nor Allen spoke during several minutes, simply watching the few people who were having a walk in the garden. It was blatant that those same people were deliberately avoiding getting near Allen, and he didn't miss the furtive glances he kept receiving from them nor the faint movement of their lips, as if they were afraid that Allen could hear them from that distance.

If Lavi was there, and if Lenalee wasn't in such a bad shape, the boy would have gone to them to lighten his mood.

"Don't look at them if it bothers you so much." Kanda's abrupt voice rose next to him.

Allen looked at his shikigami and was about to reply when he noticed that he had unconsciously gripped his robe and was clutching at it tightly enough to make his fists tremble. How come? He normally never gave a damn about what other people could think about him, so why did he feel so frustrated today?

Sighing, he stood up and dusted his costume down.

"Sometimes I wonder why I was born with white hair. Even in my village, everyone but my parents would look at me as if I was a mistake of nature. Which I probably am." he added casually. "Anyway, I'm going back to my room. You..."

"You're not a mistake of nature." Kanda cut.

Allen almost jumped at his shikigami's strangely nice tone. However, the next sentence quickly dispelled any illusion of kindness from Kanda's part:

"You're just a stupid moyashi."

And oddly enough, it made Allen chuckle.

"You're probably right." he replied.

As he walked back to his room, the young Exorcist's feeling that he couldn't care less about the others as long as Kanda was with him became stronger and stronger.

"There's a fire in the city." It took Allen a whole second to register what Kanda had just said.

"What?" he asked.

"Che. Look in front of you."

As the boy obeyed, he saw a large column of smoke rising in the air. It was too far to come from the Temple, and in that direction was located the capital city.

"What kind of fire is that if we can see the smoke from here!" Allen exclaimed. Around him, some other people had also noticed the smoke and were pointing at it, panicked. At the same moment, Allen saw Komui running to him, followed by Cloud Nine:

"Allen! It's an emergency, please go with Professor Nine to the capital immediately. The city is being raided by youkai!"

The boy gasped.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
*stares incredulously at the chapter* I blame all the awkward passages on the fact that I re-read this thing at 2 am. And I have to apologize to my dear lil alien **Hanistar7** because I was unable to improve the chapter as she advised me. *looks like a zombie because is lacking sleep*.  
Thanks to everyone who's been supporting this story, despite it being updated quite irregularly -_-. Cookies for all!


	18. Demon

A/N: Ahem. Sorry for the very late update. So here's the new chapter, and to make myself forgiven, I made a fanart of Shikigami. You'll find it in my profile. Feel free to comment it :]

And here's a short summary for people who kinda forgot the plot:

Short summary: Youkai are turning berserk because of a spell the Earl cast, including shikigami. Lenalee's shikigami died after attacking her. Allen's being more and more suspected of being a youkai, but now he finally accepts his feelings for Kanda while still not really knowing what Kanda's feelings for him are. And now Allen is sent to the capital city which is under attack.

* * *

**Chapter 18 - Demon  
**

Screams. Barely covered by shrieks of youkai, cries of children and wooden houses partly or entirely collapsing.

Allen was run off his feet; he wasn't allowed a single second of rest as youkai kept coming at him endlessly, exactly like a swarm of locusts. The Exorcist was busy trying to deal with every single youkai in sight while avoiding hitting the people who were running everywhere, panicked, trying to find a safe place to take shelter. In a way, it really irritated Allen because it was only making his job harder.

"Damn those humans! Why can't they just stay back and let us do the job instead of acting like the brainless creatures they are!" Kanda swore. Apparently, Allen wasn't the only one to be irritated.

Nevertheless, the black-haired demon was displaying a great efficiency at wiping youkai out and the area was slowly emptying itself from the berserk creatures. On his side, Allen was carrying out his duty with unexpected skills; it seemed that, from the moment he had truthfully admitted the feelings he bore for Kanda, the mastery of his barriers and his energy had somehow improved. Allen hadn't suspected that having a confused mind could reduce his abilities that much, yet, the progressive easiness with which he was controlling his energy was the proof of it.

Right now, he was spending all his strength into eliminating the youkai that had invaded the city, partly destroying several of its districts. Cloud Nine who had come with him was taking care of another area, and it seemed that the Exorcists who hadn't left for the other temples were also trying to bring peace back in some other districts. Allen could easily guess that they had as much work as him given the several columns of smoke that were rising farther away.

Focusing back on his own situation, he gritted his teeth at the sight of a woman running with a baby in her arms, desperately trying to escape the battlefield and not noticing the dog-like youkai that was running to her from behind. She was too far away from the boy for him to be able to do anything but yell at her:

"Watch your back!!"

It was a futile attempt in the middle of all that noise, and Allen watched in horror the youkai pouncing on the woman who was still running. At the last second, right before claws managed to touch her, the youkai let out a pained howl as he was cut in two by Kanda's blade.

Allen sighed of relief but didn't get to enjoy the event any longer as another youkai was coming at him. Despite the tiredness spreading into his body, he focused his mind in order to fulfill his duty as an Exorcist. He had to be done with this as quickly as possible, to avoid further casualties. Allen didn't have time to pay attention to the wounded, though quick glances here and there showed him that no one looked seriously injured. So far.

The youkai that were raiding the city weren't high rank ones, nor were they weak; however, the fires and damage brought to the buildings were a more threatening source of danger for the people who couldn't escape from a burning house or for those who were hit by falling wooden pieces.

Allen bit his lip. There weren't enough Exorcists to protect the entire population, and that thought made him double his efforts to finish his job as quickly as possible. He simply couldn't stand the sight of helpless people being hurt – or killed – by youkai right under his nose, it was bringing back to him memories he'd rather have forgotten.

_Screams._

_Fire._

_Corpses lying on the ground._

The silver-haired boy shook his head and mentally smacked himself for letting himself be distracted in the middle of a request. Yet, each sound he heard, each blood stain he saw, each house that was burning reminded him of the living nightmare he had gone through six years ago, when he was a only mere nine-year-old boy who had found himself with no family, no house, no village left in a matter of minutes.

The only difference between the current situation and back then was the presence of qualified Exorcists; and Allen intended to make it a big difference.

"Damn it! If those humans weren't in the way, I'd have taken care of this in a minute!" the boy heard Kanda curse again.

"Please don't lose control of yourself." Allen addressed his shikigami as he was about to kill another youkai.

"Shut up." Kanda snapped back. "I'm not that weak."

Allen sighed again. At the same time, several screams rose behind him. He turned round to see a tea house being devoured by flames, walls slowly collapsing on the ground. A few people whom Allen immediately identified as being imperial guards were standing in front of the building, watching and pointing frantically at the house while calling a name that made the young Exorcist widen his eyes in astonishment:

"Prince! Please get out of here! Please hurry!"

The prince? What was the son of the emperor doing in such a place? Allen rushed to the guards. There was also a man dressed with rich silks, probably the prince's tutor. As soon as he saw Allen, he called him out with a hint of relief in his tone:

"Exorcist-sama! Thank the gods, an Exorcist is here! Please save the prince! He's inside the house and can't get out!"

Allen glanced at the half-destroyed house and saw a wild youkai that looked like a cat jumping on what was left of the roof and which kept igniting small fires simply by touching the wood. Before thinking of saving anyone, he had to deal with the youkai first. He made a first attempt at immobilizing it with a spell, but the youkai was too quick for him. As the creature noticed Allen's presence, it bared its fangs and let a strident shriek out before jumping off the roof on the ground.

From that distance, Allen realized that the 'cat' was actually the size of a large dog. Flames suddenly appeared on the youkai's paws, and the boy gulped. However, a quick energy sensing reassured him, as the youkai's level of energy wasn't as high as what he had feared; which didn't mean that it was to be taken lightly.

It was at that moment that Allen wished he possessed a water shikigami, but now wasn't the time for fruitless thoughts. He made a second attempt at casting an immobilizing spell on the youkai, which missed again. The next second, the cat jumped on him but Allen managed to erect a barrier right before the burning paws reached him. Out of anger, it came at Allen repeatedly, which gave the boy the opportunity to try and paralyse it a third time. Too focused on breaking Allen's barrier, the youkai failed to dodge the spell and found itself thrown on the ground with a shriek of rage.

At that same time, a loud rumble drew Allen's attention back to tea house – or what was left of it – and he noticed with horror the whole building was now engulfed in flames. Some people were trying to put it out with buckets of water, unfortunately the effort was futile.

The boy quickly looked for Kanda and called him:

"Kanda! Take care of this youkai!" and without wasting another second, he rushed into the house.

The black-haired shikigami turned his head to where the call was coming from and thought he was going to chop someone to pieces when he saw Allen disappearing inside the burning building.

"Idiot! I can't believe that moyashi's stupidity!" he swore while hurrying to the place. In a matter of second, the cat-like youkai was no more; instead, a very angry-looking Kanda was standing, fists clenched and trembling out of fury.

"What the heck did that stupid brat go in for?" he asked the guards, barely able to control the anger in his voice.

"W-well, h-he went in to save the p-prince..." one of the guards answered, fear displayed all over his face. He, along with his companions all looked frozen under the killing aura that was emanating from Kanda.

"Isn't it your duty to protect the prince? Instead, you bunch of cowards chose to stay here and watch? Humans are worthless." the youkai spat as he turned to the house and entered it.

Meanwhile, Allen was having a lot of trouble moving forward in the middle of the flames that were surrounding him, and the smoke inside was filling his lungs, preventing him from breathing normally. He was using his sleeve to cover both his nose and mouth and was walking almost bent in two, but couldn't help but cough repeatedly.

Above him, the ceiling threatened to collapse on him at any moment, thus he had to find the prince as quickly as possible, if the latter was still alive. Burning beams were falling around him, and flames were getting dangerously close to him. Some sparks hit him on the face but he ignored the burns on his skin. Allen's eyes scanned the area in search of the prince or any other person who could still be stuck in there, but the brightness of the place was making his task difficult.

"Hey!" he called out loud. "Is anyone here?" He knew that his voice was muffled by the crackling of the fire, yet he kept calling while trying to catch any hint of replies.

Beads of sweat were standing out on his face, air had more and more trouble getting to his lungs, still he kept walking forward in the middle of the flames and the smoke. And then, as faint as a murmur, he heard a voice.

"Anyone here?" he called once more, trying to locate the voice. Again, a very faint noise answered him. Allen walked towards the bar which was miraculously still intact, walked round it and saw a small figure snuggled up under the bar.

It was a child, who was trembling in fear and looking at Allen with tear-filled eyes. Given the rich embroideries on the child's silk tunic, Allen didn't have any trouble guessing his identity. The Exorcist let out a small sigh of relief and held out his hand to the child with an encouraging smile:

"Come on, give me your hand. It's going to be ok now."

But the child frantically shook his head, too paralysed to dare move a single finger.

"Please, hurry up; we need to get out of here." Allen insisted. He coughed, having inhaled too much smoke. "Otherwise we'll be burnt alive."

The child pressed himself a bit more against the bar, stubborn. Allen couldn't blame him, but at the same time, it was beginning to annoy him a lot. He didn't want to lazy around inside a building that threatened to collapse at any time, yet he also wanted to avoid scaring the child even further.

"Come on." he repeated with a smile. "We're getting out of here, everything will be fine."

Allen expected the child to shake his head once again; however, after a moment of hesitation, he held out his hand to Allen's and started crawling to him. The young Exorcist took the child in his arms and held him firmly, then stood up and started scanning the area to look for a way out.

He didn't see any. Any exit path was blocked by the fire that was spreading around him, leaving him no chance to escape. Had he been by himself, he may have managed to weave his way through the crumbling place, but with a small child in his arms, it was impossible.

The child was gripping firmly at Allen's robe, eyes shut and his whole body shaking. Allen's situation was desperate, and frustration filled him. He wasn't even able to save one child? What kind of poor Exorcist was he? Yet, all his willpower wasn't enough to counter the dizziness in his head, nor could it clear his sight that was beginning to blur, nor could it remove the sensation of hotness that was bringing him on the verge of passing out.

He needed air, or water, or anything that could soothe the feeling of suffocation in his lungs. Allen stepped forward, but his foothold was unsteady. _Damn it._

His consciousness was progressively fading, though his arms were still holding the terrified child tightly. The only thought in his mind was saving the child. Nothing else mattered. His duty was to save people, wasn't it? However, the lack of air was making any resolution waver, and no matter how hard he tried, Allen had to face reality: he wasn't going to make it.

His dry throat suddenly filled itself with a bitter taste. The child's sobs reached Allen's ears.

"It's going to be... all right." Allen whispered, patting the child's back and trying to get some air to enter his lungs, though unsuccessfully. "Everything… will be… fine…" he said, raising his eyes in front of him.

And then, at that same moment, through his fading vision, he saw a dark figure appearing from the middle of the flames. Maybe his state was making him hallucinate, maybe it was only another beamer that was falling; yet, the figure looked so familiar that the silver-haired boy couldn't help but close his eyes and smile.

"Yes… it'll be… fine."

Those last words escaped his lips as he fell on his knees and everything went black around him.

* * *

As soon as Kanda stepped in the tea house, he sent a wave of energy to Allen to locate the boy and though he managed to find him, the Exorcist didn't reply, probably because he was too distracted by the flames. Kanda cursed mentally, and used Mugen to cut his path open while protecting his face with his free hand.

He kept sending waves of energy to make sure the brat was still alive. _Not that I'd forgive him if he were to die._ Though he didn't want to admit it, the youkai had a lot of trouble keeping calm; the mere thought of letting the stupid brat die in such a ridiculous way was enough to make his blood boil – and his heart race.

A part of the ceiling cracked, but Kanda managed to avoid the falling piece. He had to hurry up and find the moyashi before they were both buried alive. _Where is he?_ The shikigami was losing his cool, so what? It was that damn brat's fault! Where the hell was he? Kanda could still feel his master's energy, which meant he was still alive, but for how long? _Damn it!_

Smoke was filling the air, preventing Kanda from breathing normally, and the fire was spreading around him, swallowing anything inflammable on its way and growing more and more. Stupid brat! Why couldn't the idiotic kid refrain from acting recklessly? Could he even use his brain sometimes? And yet, Kanda couldn't afford to let him die.

He was getting nearer, he could feel it; Allen was very close. Kanda looked in front of him and saw a silhouette staggering and carrying something – or someone – in his arms.

"Moyashi!" the youkai called as he rushed towards the boy. At the same time, the said boy fell on his knees but never hit the ground as he landed in Kanda's lap. The youkai wrapped his free arm around Allen's back and noticed the terrified child who was clinging to Allen with his eyes shut, trembling despite the hotness surrounding them.

"Che. Why couldn't you simply let him die?" he asked the unconscious Exorcist while scooping him up.

Now the main problem was to get out of there. Kanda was surrounded by flames, with two people to take care of. _Great._ He looked up and saw a piece of sky from the part of the ceiling that had collapsed. It was the only way out.

In two swift motions, he used Mugen to slice the ceiling which fell down on the floor and jumped on the parts which weren't consumed by the fire to make his way out, Allen still closely held against him.

As Kanda landed outside, the guards – who were putting futile efforts to put the fire out with buckets of water – rushed to him.

"The prince! Did you manage to find him?" the tutor urged him, to Kanda's utmost annoyance. But neither the guards nor the tutor seemed to notice the deathly glare he set on them as he laid Allen on the ground. The boy was still holding the small child tightly against him, despite he was unconscious.

"Thank the gods, the prince is fine!" one of the guards exclaimed.

"He's breathing." the tutor added as he carefully extracted the child out of Allen's arms.

The said prince was crying, his face buried in his tutor's robe.

"There, there. You're safe now. Please, stop crying." the man was trying to calm the child down.

No one was paying attention to Allen, which irritated Kanda to no end. He was kneeling besides the boy, one hand putting the sweat-damped silver locks away from his closed eyes.

"Oi." his low and dangerous tone surprised the other people. "Not only did you fail to protect this whiny brat, but you also plan to let the one who did the job for you die here?" It wasn't a question, but rather an implicit order, which the tutor didn't fail to notice, and he hurriedly ordered the guards to do the necessary for Allen to be brought to the palace and be treated there immediately.

"Che. Worthless humans." Kanda muttered under his breath.

* * *

"This is boring." Lavi complained for the hundredth time.

"We'll get to the place in a day or so, please bear with it." Nishiko replied with a sigh. The russet fox-like youkai on which Lavi was riding was making light work of distances, yet the journey was beginning to get tiring for both of them.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. You're the one who's been galloping for a week and I'm the one complaining. Sorry, Nishiko." Lavi apologized, patting his youkai's head. Nishiko chuckled.

"I think I'm not the only one you're bothering." the youkai said, then turned its head on the side.

Next to them, a male Exorcist was also riding his shikigami. He looked at Nishiko, then Lavi, and said with a smile:

"You're not bothering me at all. Don't worry, I'm also beginning to get a bit bored by this travel. And so are you, Saryo, am I wrong?" he asked his shikigami. The huge wolf-like youkai graciously shook its white head:

"I don't mind long travels like these. At least I can see some different landscapes. See how the scenery is nice today."

"True. It is." Lavi replied. "Suman, you're lucky to have such a cool shikigami!"

The man merely laughed.

The Exorcists were crossing the country, resting in the villages located on their way. It was easy for an Exorcist to find shelter when needed; if the costume wasn't enough, a few exorcisms in some houses usually convinced most villagers and they were more than glad to offer accommodations for a night.

Right now, the sky was blazing in fiery shades of red and orange and the next village could be seen a few miles farther.

"We'll get there before nightfall." Nishiko commented.

"Hm hm." the Exorcist replied absently, too absorbed in his boredom, until his shikigami braked violently, almost sending him flying over the youkai.

"Nishiko, wha-" Lavi started but stopped immediately as he felt an unknown spiritual energy right in front of him. He directed his gaze in the same direction and frowned at the silhouette standing there.

What struck Lavi was the unusual dark skin as well as the cross-shaped scars on the man's forehead. His elegant facial features were graced with a faint smile and his piercing gaze was only enhanced by the fading daylight.

"Good evening, dear Exorcist." he greeted Lavi warmly. "I think I heard you complaining that you were bored, so how about we enjoy ourselves a bit?" he suggested, his smile widening.

* * *

Allen opened his eyes, and the first thing he felt was the bandage on his cheek. Then, as he brought his hand to the said cheek, he noticed that there were also bandages on both his hands. He winced at the powerful headache hammering his skull but managed to gather enough strength to recall what had happened. Right. The fire. He remembered finding the child, then trying to escape, but after that, his memory was blank. With difficulty, he sat up on his futon and rubbed his tired eyes.

How come he was still alive, with a few mere burns only?

Allen didn't recognize the room he was in; if it was a hospital room, then it wasn't the Temple's one. This one was larger, and a pleasant fragrance of incense was filling it, mixed with a very familiar scent of forest…

"Awake, Moyashi?" Oh yes. That voice he knew so well. He turned his head on the side and saw his shikigami sitting cross-legged beside him.

"Where is this place? How long have I been sleeping?" Allen asked, not really expecting Kanda to reply. That's why he was surprised to hear the youkai's answer:

"Three hours. Better than last time. And this is the imperial palace."

"Oh…"

Silence followed. A rather uneasy silence, as Allen intensely stared at his blanket for lack of having anything else to do, while Kanda had locked his eyes on the boy. In the end, not bearing it any more, Allen decided to resume a semblance of conversation:

"Is the boy all right?" he asked.

"Che. I'm almost surprised it wasn't the first question you asked when you woke up." Kanda sneered.

"Just answer me." Allen said, sighing. He simply wasn't in the mood to argue.

"He's fine."

"Well, it's all that matters." the Exorcist commented with a soft smile. Little did he know, that mere sentence was enough to make something snap within Kanda. One second after those words were pronounced, Allen found himself being roughly pinned back on the futon by his shikigami who was holding him by the collar. As he gasped under the sudden gesture, his eyes met Kanda's, and the only thing he could decipher in those dark blue pupils was sheer anger.

"Kanda! Wh-"

"It's all that matters? Damn it, Moyashi, you could have _died_ back there!" the youkai cut him with a tone that clearly showed that he had been holding back for all the time Allen wasn't awake. "And you'd be dead now if I hadn't come for you!"

"I don't get why you are so mad!" Allen replied back, not registering Kanda's last words. "I honestly don't! There was someone dying in there, how could you expect me not to do anything? Unlike you, I _care_ about human beings!"

"You're right." Kanda replied icily. "I don't care about human beings. But I'm your shikigami and I can't stand having a master stupid enough to jump head on in a building on fire."

"Well, in case you have forgotten, you were the one who said that my survival instinct is close to zero, so you shouldn't have been that surprised." Allen snapped back with the same tone.

"Then maybe I should punch some of that survival instinct into your thick head!"

Allen was confused. There had been only one time when he had seen his shikigami lose his composure to that extent, and it was when he had met his twin brother. Secretly, he did have a faint idea as for why Kanda was reacting so violently, yet he didn't want to give much credit to his hopes, for fear of having to a face a much harsher truth. But he wanted to give it a try anyway. That's why he went on with a slightly cooler tone:

"You're not making any sense, Kanda. Why didn't you let me die there? It's not like I'd have died by the hand of a youkai, after all. Your curse would have been lifted, you'd have all your powers, and you'd be free to do whatever you want with them. So why?"

At those words, Kanda's eyes widened, and he was left unable to speak for several seconds as Allen was still waiting for an answer. The boy could tell how tight the youkai's grip on his collar was, because he could feel Kanda's hand shaking with what had to be fury.

Inside the demon's head, a storm was raging. He summoned all his self-control not to actually punch the boy lying underneath him. Why? Because the damn brat wasn't wrong. Under normal circumstances, Kanda would have let him die and everything would have been over. Under normal circumstances.

But now, he was painfully aware of the fact that the circumstances were everything but normal between Allen and him. He was more than reluctant to voice it out; however, the boy's stupidity was so exasperating that he couldn't restrain himself any longer and his mouth opened again to let out the words which definitely lifted any ambiguity:

"Is it so hard for you to accept that I may want to protect you not because I have to, but because I want to?" he asked dryly.

Allen's heart made a leap in his chest. In the room, the only sounds that could be heard were his and Kanda's breathing, though Allen was almost certain that his heart thumping was also very audible.

Finally. The words he longed to hear so much without never really hoping for it. Those words weren't a passionate confession of attachment; they were a mere statement of Kanda's will; yet, coming from him, the meaning they bore was everything Allen needed. Still, he wanted more.

He wanted to make sure.

"What do you mean?" he asked while staring straight into his shikigami's eyes. It was cruel to ask Kanda such a question, he knew it, but he needed confirmation. And the confirmation he got was more than enough for him, as his lips were captured by Kanda's and his mouth was forced open by a demanding tongue.

It didn't matter anymore that his burns were hurting him, the pain was easily erased by the warm feeling that seized his entire body, like every time he get to taste his shikigami. Allen pulled Kanda closer to him by wrapping both his arms around his neck, and let out a small whimper when the demon bit on his lip before kissing him again. The hand on his collar was now cupping his cheek and slowly sliding in his snowy hair while a tongue started making its way on his neck, eliciting a soft gasp from him.

It amazed Allen how Kanda's fury could turn so quickly into _this_. It was as if two characters were dwelling inside the same body and switching instantly at will. And gods, it felt _good_. Their lips met again in a not so gentle kiss, because the word gentle wasn't part of Kanda's vocabulary after all; yet Allen didn't mind the feeling of being taken over by his own shikigami. It was during those moments that the notions of master and shikigami were completely meaningless.

When Kanda pulled back, the boy sighed of delight, though his cheeks were flushed out of embarrassment. They were in a public place after all, and Allen had to thank his luck that no one had entered the room yet.

As Kanda sat back without another word or another look for Allen, the latter sat up, trying to find something to break the heavy silence.

"Do I have to understand that I do mean something for you?" he asked, and got the pleasure to see his shikigami twitch in annoyance.

"Che. Brat." Kanda merely replied with a shrug, and Allen couldn't help but chuckle.

"Kanda, I…"

"Shut up." the youkai cut him, irritated. "Just shut up."

This time, a faint smile appeared on Allen's lips. Kanda was a proud demon after all, one couldn't ask him to admit openly that he could share human feelings, especially when those feelings involved being attached to a human being.

Allen fell back on his futon and closed his eyes, exhaustion slowly reminding him that he was still recovering from his injuries.

* * *

"Are you certain you clearly saw him ordering the youkai to set fire to the house?" the priest asked.

"Yes. I saw it with my own eyes, it was a boy with white hair." the man replied while nodding vigorously. "There aren't many boys with white hair, that's why I'm sure it was him! At first I thought he was an Exorcist because of his robe, but then he summoned the youkai and ordered it to set fire to that house! I'm sure that brat is a demon under the disguise of a child! He probably also planned the whole attack on the city!"

"Very well. We shall investigate this matter immediately since I find it strange that an Exorcist who has been acknowledged as such by the Temple of the Black Order could actually be a demon. Your testimony will be taken into consideration." the priest replied with a tone that signified the end of the conversation.

The man nodded, obviously satisfied, then bowed and left. He walked in the streets of the city, then turned at a corner. A second later, the man was no more and instead, it was a black cat that was moving smoothly along the street, satisfied as the Earl's orders had been carried out successfully.

* * *

"What kind of joke is this?" Cloud Nine asked, visibly irritated. "I heard you're suspecting my pupil to be a demon? What is this nonsense?"

"We simply want to check whether the testimony we received is true or not." the priest replied. "If we realize that he truly is an Exorcist, then he'll receive the emperor's thanks and gratitude for saving his son. We are taking some precautions, after all the repetitive attacks. And this is the emperor's orders, thus I fear you have no power to intervene in this matter. However, you may inform the superior of your temple so he can come here and discuss with us."

"Of course I will!" the woman replied sharply. "You'd better treat the boy well meanwhile." she added warningly before striding out.

* * *

Allen didn't get to rest for that long as a doctor came in, followed by several priests and, strangely enough, by two guards. As soon as they stepped in, Kanda knew by the grave look on their faces that they didn't come there to thank Allen for fulfilling his duty as an Exorcist. His suspicions only rose when the doctor woke the boy up none too gently and one of the priests – visibly the head priest – coldly declared as Allen opened his eyes:

"Young boy, you and your shikigami are to come with me immediately."

Allen blinked twice, then sat up and asked, intrigued:

"Did something happen?"

"In a way." the man merely replied.

Frowning, Allen complied anyway, and followed the priest out of the room with Kanda by his side. Maybe it was his imagination, but the boy noticed a trace of tension among the people who were accompanying him.

They walked outside the palace and crossed the imperial gardens to the shrine. During the walk, Allen tried to break the silence that was beginning to make him very uncomfortable:

"What is it that requires my coming with you?" he asked politely.

"You'll see soon enough, young boy." the head priest replied shortly.

Needless to say, worry started instilling itself in Allen as he kept wondering what in heaven could be happening for the priest to be so stiff about it. They entered the shrine, but instead of heading for the altar, the priest who had talked to Allen walked towards what the boy thought was a wall at first before realizing that it was a huge, plain door. The priest slid it open, revealing a narrow corridor with staircases that were going down, but it was too dark for Allen to see where those staircases were leading to. There was a single torch hung at the wall of the corridor. If anything, the existence of such a corridor inside the imperial shrine seemed very gloomy.

The priest motioned to the others with a nod, then addressed the young Exorcist:

"We'll have your friend here follow the priests down there while you'll be coming with me to another room." It took Allen a second to understand that by 'friend', he meant Kanda.

"What for?" Allen asked. Now, it wasn't only worry that could be heard in his voice, but also suspicion.

"A mere check of your energy status. You need not worry about anything."

Despite the answer, Allen couldn't help but feel that something was definitely not right. He glanced at Kanda and noticed that his shikigami was frowning, obviously sharing the same feelings as him. As if the priest had read Allen's thoughts, he added on his lightest tone:

"It's your superior Komui who requested such a check for every Exorcist. He fears that the overuse of exorcisms may have disrupted your spiritual energy in a way that even doctors can't detect."

"Komui-san asked for it?" Allen asked, surprised. He was only half reassured by the reason, but then Kanda spoke:

"Whatever. Let's get over with it quickly." he said dryly.

The priest nodded, and a second later, Allen could only watch reluctantly as his shikigami went down the dark stairs followed by some of the priests. One of the remaining ones shut the door and turned to Allen:

"Then now, please follow us."

Allen was led into a circular room lit by small lamps on the wall, quite similar to the Room of Purification at the Temple of the Black Order with tall and wide pillars, except that there was no pool in the middle. However, many seals of papers were hanging in the air on strings that were crossing the room from one pillar to another.

"Please stand in the middle of the room." the head priest said.

Allen complied, and the feeling of insecurity inside him only increased when he saw the priests standing around him on a circle, then forming a seal with their hands. They started uttering an incantation, and a second later, the boy felt as if lightning had struck him.

Acute pain seized him and spread through his whole body, making him scream and fall on his knees. As he made an attempt at standing up again, he found himself unable to move as his arms and legs were now tied to the pillars by long ropes of light. With difficulty, he raised his eyes towards a priest:

"Wh…what did you…do?" he asked, panting.

"As I said, a check. The spell we cast on you was to detect any trace of demonic energy in you, and the fact that you were affected by it means that you are a demon. Which is why we are now keeping you in our custody here, and you'll answer all of our questions." the priest replied coldly.

"A… demon? What are you talking about?" Allen asked, disconcerted. "I'm not a demon!" he added, trying to pull on his ropes though unsuccessfully.

"Do not move, demon."

At those words, a new wave of pain engulfed Allen's body, drawing another scream from his mouth. In his mind, everything was confused. What the hell was happening? Were those people really priests of the palace? Did Komui really ask for such a 'check'? And… and…

"Kanda!" he called out between two pants. "Where's he?"

"If you are talking about that other youkai, then it's being taken care of too." the priest replied placidly.

"Let him go! He's my shikigami!" Allen exclaimed.

"Stop speaking nonsense. Demons do not possess any shikigami. Now, I think I ordered you not to move."

For the third time, electricity shot through Allen, but this time, the boy gritted his teeth in order not to scream. His limbs were trembling, his breathing was ragged and small drops of sweat were appearing on his forehead. Just what was happening? And was Kanda being treated the same way? No… not Kanda… he was too powerful to let himself be caught like that, wasn't he?

Allen made an attempt at calling his shikigami through their bond, but unlike the other times, he came up against and invisible barrier that was blocking him and preventing him from using his energy to call Kanda. The ropes binding him were certainly the origin of the barrier.

"Now tell us your name and your purpose here."

"You're mistaking…" he managed to spoke. "I'm not… a demon."

"I asked for your name, demon." the priest repeated coldly.

"A…Allen Walker. Please call Komui… I'm sure there must be… a mistake…"

"There isn't any. The spell detected an evil energy in you, it is no use lying to us."

"I'm not…"

"Enough!"

This time, Allen failed at muffling his scream as unbearable pain made his body spasm uncontrollably. At the same time, he could feel the ropes bruising his wrists and ankles every time they rubbed against his skin, and the boy shut his eyes tight to prevent tears from falling.

_Kanda!_ He kept trying to call his shikigami. _Kanda!_

But the familiar wave of energy that Kanda usually sent as a reply never came.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Here you are! And by the way, if you like it, I'll post some more fanarts of Shikigami. Otherwise, I'll keep them for myself :D


	19. Waver

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

* * *

**Chapter 19 - Waver  
**

"They what?" Komui asked, dumbfounded as he heard Cloud Nine reporting.

"I got the same reaction as you." the blonde woman replied dryly, though her irritation was directed at the priests of the palace. "How could the young Walker possibly be a demon after he risked his life to save their damn prince? The palace requested your presence."

"This is serious. I'm leaving at once."

"I'm going with you." a voice rose from the door.

Tiedoll was standing there, a grave look displayed on his face. The Chinese man nodded, obviously grateful for the offer, then addressed Nine:

"Will you and Bookman take care of matters here while I'm away?"

"Of course."

* * *

"What the hell is wrong with this youkai!" a priest shouted.

"Block his movements! Block him!" another one added, panicked.

"Impossible! He's abnormally strong! And I've used too much energy!" a third one replied.

The three priests were standing with difficulty, while two others had fallen to one knee, panting and absolutely not expecting to meet such resistance from the black-haired youkai that standing in the middle, glaring at them with eyes darkened by a barely repressed anger. The blazing aura that was emanating from his body contrasted sharply with the icy features displayed on his face, and the vibrations of his released energy could be clearly felt in the whole room where he had been taken to in order to be interrogated, filling the priests with fear.

Inwardly, Kanda was furious and enjoying himself at the same time. Furious because those stupid priests had thought they could restrain him with average level spells, enjoying himself because he now had the opportunity to legitimately instill true panic in those silly humans' minds. It had been so long since the last time Kanda was given a chance to face those pathetic creatures, to make them realize the wide gap between their respective levels.

And it was thrilling to see them desperately trying to bind him with spells only to have Kanda break free a second later. Oh, those spells were certainly powerful enough to prevent a youkai of a respectable level from moving; however, Kanda wasn't a youkai of a respectable level. He was a thousand-year-old demon, feared even amongst demons at that time before a curse was put on him.

Yet, he wasn't allowed to demonstrate his full potential. Despite his demonic nature, he was still a shikigami, and as such, he was bound not to use his powers on human beings. In some other circumstances, he'd have been more than glad to play with those priests, but right now, there was another priority: the moyashi.

He had tried calling him, but the boy seemed to be hidden by an invisible barrier.

One of the priests tried to enclose Kanda inside a barrier, but the latter shattered it in a matter of seconds. The only thing that was annoying him was that he couldn't summon Mugen for some reason. He suspected the room to be specially prepared for dangerous youkai, meaning that it had to be impregnated with spells and seals.

"I'm asking you again: what are your real motives?" Kanda demanded with no hint of obligingness in his tone. Then, as no one replied him, he walked towards one of the standing priest who started stepping back until his back touched the wall. Kanda smirked, then grabbed him by the collar.

"I want an answer." he ordered icily.

"You're... you're suspected of ordering the attack on the city, along with the boy who was accompanying you." the priest replied in a breath, sweat beading at his forehead.

Kanda growled with disdain.

"And what makes you think that?" he asked again.

At that same moment, a scream echoed through the walls, and Kanda didn't have any difficulty recognizing the voice.

"Moyashi." he said, frowning and looking up. His gaze then quickly turned to a priest who had chuckled after hearing the scream.

"Too bad. It seems your companion is having more trouble than you." the man said.

"What do you mean?" Kanda asked sharply. "Where's he?"

"He's being interrogated."

Another scream was heard. Kanda cursed.

"You're coming with me." he addressed the priest he was still holding. "Show me where he is."

"You're not going anywhere, demon!" Another priest shouted as he made another attempt at immobilizing Kanda. Which failed as he dodged the spell easily.

"Che. Useless. Now make any other suspicious move and this man's dead." he warned.

Of course he was lying. Kanda's hands itched to kill those worthless humans in a single blow, but he couldn't afford to let his temper loose, because of the rules that bound any shikigami. But those weaklings were too terrified to remember that Kanda was a shikigami; perhaps they didn't even thought of him as a shikigami. So instead, he used those same hands to drag the priest to the door.

"Lead the way." he said.

* * *

Again, Allen tried pulling on the long ropes tying him to the pillars of the circular room, but only managed to deepen the – now bleeding – scratches on his wrists. A hiss escaped his lips.

Misunderstanding. Confusion. He couldn't get why he was being held like this, questioned as if he had committed some crime.

Anger. It was unfair! He had saved the prince, hadn't he? Allen hadn't expected to be thanked with honours or anything; however, he certainly hadn't expected to be called a demon and treated as such. And he couldn't even call Kanda. That last point was the most worrying for him, as he kept wondering how his shikigami was faring. Certainly better than him. He found it almost funny to worry about his shikigami while he himself was in a pitiful situation.

And as if to answer his question, the door was burst open, taking the priests aback. Allen raised his eyes and a wave of relief seized him like never before.

"Kanda..." he called, a faint smile on his lips. Even if he was half knocked-out by the repetitive shocks the priests were sending him, he could clearly see Kanda's traits, and they certainly weren't showing compassion.

And indeed, at the sight of Allen on his knees, tied and with pain displayed on his face, Kanda couldn't feel anything else but his usual contempt towards those repugnant beings that dared called themselves 'priests' and yet were treating one of their own kind in such a way.

He dropped the priest he was holding on the floor and addressed those facing him, on their guards:

"Do you plan to kill him?" he asked coldly.

"How did you escape?" the head priest asked instead while forming a seal with his hands, imitated by his fellows.

"Che. Don't even think you're on the same level as me." Kanda spat. "You low priests don't have such a power." And as if to stress his words, he let out a wave of his energy, shaking the whole room and making the priests step back under the powerful shock.

The head priest was the only one who managed to keep a grave look on his face as he declared:

"Your words hold no power over us, for we can kill your comrade in an instant."

And to prove his statement, Allen convulsed again with a cry of pain under a new shock sent by another priest.

Kanda glanced at the boy with an undecipherable expression, then glared at the head priest was blocking the way. Behind him, Allen was panting heavily, his head down.

"I thought priests weren't supposed to kill people." Kanda merely replied.

"Indeed. But we can dispose of demons, even if their physical appearance is that of a human."

"What are you talking about?" Kanda snapped. "That brat is everything but a demon."

"Enough. Now tell us the truth: for what purpose did you attack the city? Are you the ones responsible for all the attacks that have been occurring for over a month?" the man asked impassively.

"I wish I was. Unfortunately I didn't have such a pleasure." Kanda's little patience was being dangerously eroded. "We've spent most of our time ridding the city of every youkai in it, and that idiotic kid even almost _died_ to save your prince!" he added while pointing towards the said kid.

"To deceive us. I'm giving you a last chance: tell us your goal or your friend might get seriously hurt."

Kanda bit his lip, feeling the urge to kill the priest on the spot. How human beings could be so stubborn was beyond him.

"Kanda..." Allen's voice brought him back to reality. "Don't mind me. There's something wrong here... and only you can..." he never finished his sentence as a new wave of sharp pain took over him. He screamed. Kanda growled.

"I don't need you to tell me that." he said sharply. Then he turned to the priest:

"What makes you think he's a demon?" he asked, voice hardened by scorn.

"We cast a spell on him and it identified him as a demon. But I'm not here to discuss with you. If you don't w..."

"Your spell isn't functioning, obviously." Kanda cut him. "Call his superior here, and he'll tell you."

"You are both pretty stubborn." the priest merely replied. However, in his head, doubts started rising. There was no point for a demon to lie about someone's nature, yet those two kept asserting that the white-haired boy was a human being. Was it some sort of trick? But what for? And if the boy was really a human, then the treatment he was giving him was unforgivable. But the spell had reacted to the boy's energy, meaning that it was of demonic nature.

He had to make sure. That's why he merely said:

"We already informed the Temple of the Black Order of this. For now, you are under the authority of the emperor and we'll interrogate you."

Kanda snorted.

"Che, what do you think you can do to me? I'm under no one's authority, and certainly not under the authority of a human who thinks he was sent by the gods."

The priest twitched at those words, but decided not to pay attention to them.

"As I said before, we can kill your companion right here." he said gravely. "We were given authorization to."

Kanda turned his eyes to Allen, and for a second, their gazes meet. Allen's heartbeat raced, he couldn't find any trace of concern in his shikigami's traits. Perhaps it was his blurry vision, or perhaps it was simply because there was no concern to be found. Kanda's next words pierced him more cruelly than any of the spells he had taken:

"Then kill him. I don't particularly mind."

Allen's blood ran cold in his veins. Of course, he had told Kanda not to mind him, still... The head priest also frowned in surprise, which made Kanda smirk.

"What's with that look? I'm a demon, so of course I don't care if a mere human is killed by his fellows. Actually, it'd be quite entertaining, so go ahead. And after that, I'll kill you." he added.

The priest didn't fail to notice the eerie glint that surfaced in the youkai's dark eyes, and gulped. A bead of sweat fell down his cheek, and his composure was now only a facade. His tense and pallid face could barely veil the fear stiffening his body, yet his voice wasn't trembling when he spoke again:

"If you wanted to kill us, you'd have already done so; which means there's something that prevents you from killing us."

Kanda cursed silently. That damn priest was too clever for his own good. And now, even the other priests seemed to look a bit less terrified after hearing those words. However, Kanda didn't show any sign of getting flustered.

"Don't try your luck with me." he declared with a low and threatening tone. The trick worked, as he saw hesitation painting the priest's face.

"We'll deal with you after we are done with that other one." he said, voice slightly wavering.

"Che. I didn't know that priests were also murderers." Kanda sneered, crossing his arms.

He turned to Allen who was now glancing quickly from the priest to Kanda, panic starting to build up in him. He didn't know what was the most unbearable, the priest's cold look on him or Kanda's impassive face. Why? Why wasn't Kanda more concerned about him? Had he been wrong thinking that the demon actually felt something for him? Had he gotten his hopes too high?

"Let me correct you." the priest went on. "We are not the ones who are going to kill this demon."

"Che, then who?"

The man didn't reply. Instead, he motioned the priests who were in charge of Allen with a quick gesture of his hand, and they nodded before releasing the spell that was tying Allen to the pillars. The ropes of light disappeared, and the young Exorcist fell on the ground, only to find himself being grabbed from behind by the collar and tied again by a new rope that wrapped itself around him, preventing him from using his arms. He was dragged towards the wall of the circular room and it was only at that moment that Kanda noticed that there was an almost invisible door with a lock on it. As soon as one the priest unlocked the door and opened it, a surge of spiritual energy flowed out, followed by a loud growl.

The black-haired youkai frowned. He hadn't felt the energy before the door was opened, which meant it had been concealed by some spell.

"To answer your question, it's not 'who'. It's 'what'." the head priest resumed talking.

It didn't take Kanda too long to understand what the priest was implying.

"Why are you keeping a youkai here?" he asked with a dangerously low tone.

"We captured a youkai that has lost its mind in order to study it and find the cause of the recent events." the man replied. "And now it'll be used to grant your wish: it'll be the one to kill your comrade."

Both Allen and Kanda's eyes widened. The boy struggled violently in an attempt at freeing himself from the ropes but failed miserably. If only he could use his hands, then he'd have been able to deal with the youkai, even in his state; but right now it was impossible for him to move.

Kanda was standing immobile, barely able to control the flows of anger and fury that were boiling inside of him. His fists were clenched so tightly they were trembling and his knuckles were turning colourless.

"Stop this immediately." the icy words came out from his tightened lips.

The head priest raised an eyebrow.

"What is it now? Didn't you say a few minutes ago you didn't care if your comrade were to die?" he asked lightly.

Kanda didn't reply, but his blazing eyes spoke for him.

"Do I have to understand that you may behave a bit more now?" the priest went on. "I'll take your silence as a 'yes'."

At that moment, when Kanda felt ropes wind around him and tasted the meaning of the word 'powerlessness', he swore to himself that the first thing he'd do once he was free would be to slaughter every living priest and make them suffer the most unimaginable tortures.

* * *

"Oh no. Oh no no no. Nononononono." Road despaired while pacing back and forth, shaking her head while gripping at her hair. "Uncle Tyki isn't going to be happy."

"Why is that?" a voice made the demon girl turn her head towards the direction where it was coming, and she sighed.

"Oh, I didn't hear you coming. Hello, Sheryl." she greeted non too enthusiastically.

"Road, Road!" the said Sheryl exclaimed theatrically. "How many times do I have to tell you to call me 'Daddy'!"

"And how many times do I have to remind you that I find it utterly stupid to call you by that name? I just hate that word created by humans to refer to their progenitor. And you're everything but my progenitor in the way humans mean it."

"But you call my brother 'uncle'! That's unfair."

"It's not the same. Anyway, I have more important matters to deal with now." Road quickly changed the subject.

"What would they be?"

Road sighed again.

"Kanrou disappeared." she said, making Sheryl frown. The male demon, whose traits undoubtedly shared the same characteristics as Tyki, crossed his arms then asked again:

"How so?"

"Uncle Tyki asked me to keep an eye on him, but he managed to deceive my vigilance somehow. I don't know where he is nor what he's planning."

"Being able to deceive your vigilance means that Kanrou was aware of your keeping watch on him." Sheryl commented pensively. "Does the Earl know about this?"

"Not yet. I'm still trying to find a way to find that damn Kanrou." the girl replied, though her eyes reflected a deeper apprehension than what her voice let show.

* * *

As soon as Komui and Tiedoll arrived at the palace, they was led to the usual reception room where tea and a few cakes were waiting for them, but the older man was the only one to help himself as Komui's mind was too preoccupied by what Nine had told him that he didn't even noticed them.

After what seemed to be hours, the head priest finally came and sat in front of them. Komui didn't waste a minute and went straight to the main topic:

"Would you mind explaining what exactly happened and why are you keeping one of my Exorcists in your custody?" he asked, trying to control the worry in his voice. After all, it could be a mere misunderstanding and everything could be settled in no time. However, the priest's answer quickly disillusioned him:

"During the attack on the city today, someone asserted they saw the one you call an Exorcist order the youkai around. That is why we had the boy undergo a test which revealed that he is a demon."

"This is impossible. There must be a mistake somewhere." Komui replied immediately.

"Could you lead us to Allen-kun?" Tiedoll asked right after. His tone was quiet, as usual, yet the hint of authority in it was clear enough and the priest wasn't stupid enough to give a negative answer.

"Of course." he merely said as he stood up.

He led the two men to the room where Allen was being held. As soon as they stepped in, Komui's eyes widened while Tiedoll emitted an indignant sound. Allen, whose arms and legs were still tied, raised his head and didn't hide the relief on his face as he saw his superior and his teacher.

"Allen!" the Chinese man called as he rushed towards the young Exorcist. "Allen!"

"I'm... fine." the boy replied with a weak smile. Exhaustion was showing on his face, strands of his hair were sweat-damped and his breathing was slow, as if he was trying to recover from an intense effort.

"What is the meaning of this?" Komui asked the head priest sharply, voice slightly trembling.

"He's suspected of leading the attacks on the city." the priest replied, barely flustered by Komui's tone.

"How could you think something like that?"

"As I told you before, a witness saw him ordering youkai around, and he has been identified as a demon by the spell we cast on him."

"What kind of spell did you use?" Tiedoll intervened as he walked towards Allen and knelt next to him.

"Who is that witness?" Komui added. Then, on a quieter tone, he told Allen: "Hang in there. You'll be released soon, believe me."

The priest frowned of disapproval.

"We never said we're going to release him any time soon. Not until he tells us what he knows. And to answer you both, the witness is a man who lives near the premises of the recent attack. I sent someone to look for him as I thought you'd ask to meet him. They should be here very soon. And the spell we used is the detection spell."

"You didn't have to treat Allen that way." Komui went on dryly. "He..."

"Komui, please let me concentrate." Tiedoll cut him abruptly.

Komui cocked an eyebrow and watched as the old man put a hand on Allen's arm and was now deeply concentrated, eyes closed, as if he was trying to feel something from the contact. Half a minute later, he opened his eyes again and looked at the priest:

"A detection spell, you said. It is supposed to determine whether one's energy is of demonic nature or not, isn't it? Then it is only natural that Allen-kun reacted to it. I felt traces of a demon's energy mixed with his." Tiedoll explained calmly. "And I'm pretty sure it is Kanda's energy. Now the only question is: how come? Do you have any idea, Allen-kun?" he asked the boy gently.

To say the least, Allen wasn't in any shape to think about anything; however, as he heard the mention of Kanda's energy mixed with his, his brain clicked. Images slowly came back to him. On that day... the first time he had gone berserk and Kanda had been forced to calm him down by pouring his own energy into his... it couldn't be anything else, could it? And he was being held here, tied like a criminal, enduring a pain he should never have tasted, simply because of that incident? It was ridiculous. Yet, it was the only explanation.

That's why he opened his mouth, and started speaking, though his voice was weakened by the treatments he had received:

"It was... during a mission. It was an accident. Kanda was forced to use his energy to... help me. It was an accident." he explained succinctly. He didn't feel like giving too many details, thus he tried to remain as vague as possible.

To Allen's relief, it seemed that Komui blamed it on his exhausted state, for he stood up and turned to the head priest:

"It seems it is because he was fulfilling his duty as an Exorcist that he ended up like this. And this is how you thank him. This boy is as human as you and I. Now I suggest you release him immediately before aggravating things." he demanded.

"We cannot oblige you with this." With a sigh, the priest went on: "You have to understand that we are in a period of crisis right now, and we cannot afford to risk anything. If doubt remains, then we have to act. It is..."

"Muneda-sama!" a voice interrupted him. The head priest turned round to the messenger who had just entered the room, out of breath.

"What is it? Where is the witness?" he asked with a hint of annoyance.

"Well... we can't seem to find him, the address he gave us does not exist..." the messenger replied, visibly apprehensive of the priest's reaction.

"What did you say?" the latter asked again, frowning.

"Now, it seems your reasons for keeping Allen here are not valid anymore." Komui intervened. "Therefore, I'll request that you free him at once."

The head priest bit his lip, visibly in the middle of an inner struggle with himself. Noticing it, the Chinese man spoke again, trying to soften his tone:

"I understand your will to deal with the attacks as quickly as possible; however, it shouldn't lead you to act thoughtlessly and risk an innocent life. And I daresay you even owe him the prince's life, don't you?"

Silence followed his words. Tiedoll was dabbing at Allen's sweaty forehead with a handkerchief while checking his physical state. The only visible wounds were the scratches on his wrists and ankles, which wasn't surprising as the spells used by the priests weren't supposed to inflict visible injuries.

"Please do make a decision, and quickly." the old man repeated. "We are wasting a precious time, and this boy here could be helping us right now if he weren't being held here for a reason that is unfounded."

"Very well." the priest replied dryly. "However," he addressed Komui, "you will be held responsible for the boy's acts."

"Certainly." Komui replied immediately.

With an annoyed sigh, the head priest reluctantly motioned his subordinates to break the spell binding Allen. The ropes of light disappeared, and Allen's arms fell flatly beside him. As soon as he was released, he turned to Tiedoll:

"Kanda... he's also being held somewhere around here." he said hastily. "I need to..."

"First, you need to have your wounds treated, no matter how shallow they are." Tiedoll cut him, gently but firmly. With a piece of cloth, he roughly bandaged Allen's wrists and ankles. "We'll treat these more properly when you come back to the Temple." he commented.

Meanwhile, Komui was addressing the priest: "You have to release his shikigami as well. I can assure you there is nothing to fear from him, as he's bound to the same laws as every shikigami on this earth."

"I pray that you are right, Komui." the priest replied gravely.

A few minutes later, the small group was standing in front of the room where Kanda was being interrogated. Allen had a bit of a trouble walking as his ankles were hurting him, and had to lean on Komui to ease the pain.

However, as the door opened and he saw Kanda, he forgot at once any pain he could feel and rushed to his shikigami. Surprised, the priests who were there tried to stop him but their superior's voice stopped them.

"Let him. And let the demon go as well." Then, given the confused looks on the priests' faces, he repeated more firmly: "There have been some unexpected events. For now, they are free to go."

On a single gesture from the priests, the ropes binding Kanda vanished. Allen knelt by his side and held his shikigami's face between his palms, eyes filled with worry. Obviously he had undergone the same treatment as him, even if he hid the pain pretty well; but Allen could tell by Kanda's small pants that the past few hours hadn't been particularly enjoyable. And it was his fault. It was because the priests had threatened to kill him that Kanda had to comply. Allen's heart sank for a second as he removed his hands.

"Kanda, how a..."

"Che, don't give me such a pathetic face." Kanda cut him sharply. "I'm fine."

At first slightly surprised, Allen soon smiled at the answer. It was so typical of Kanda.

"I can see that. Now, let's go, Kanda. It seems Komui managed to convince them that we're not involved in the youkai attacks."

"I swear the first thing I'll do when I'm free will be to kill every priest I meet on my way." Kanda muttered while glaring at jailers. Then, seeing Allen's expression, he smirked and added: "Don't look so shocked, Moyashi."

"I'm-I'm not shocked!" Allen replied, perhaps a bit too loudly. He went on with a lower tone: "I just wished you could stop saying such things so casually, that's all." Then, with a sigh, he added: "Never mind. Let's go."

Then, noticing that his shikigami didn't move, he called

"Kanda?"

The latter didn't reply. Instead, he picked something on the ground. It was at that moment only that Allen noticed the scratches on Kanda's wrists, but his attention was soon directed at what his shikigami had picked.

His eyes widened as he recognized the bracelet he had offered him; the wooden beads weren't attached anymore for the string was broken. And for some reason, seeing Kanda keep the beads as if they were made of something precious made Allen's heart pound more quickly than usual. To anyone else, it could have been a detail of no importance, but not to Allen.

"Oi, stop daydreaming, Moyashi." Kanda's abrupt voice made Allen jump. The youkai had stood up and was barely looking at Allen who was still kneeling on the ground.

"It's Allen, Bakanda." the boy replied, standing up.

* * *

"Komui, there's something I'd like to talk to you about." Tiedoll said gravely.

The Chinese man raised his head from his paperwork.

"What is it?" he asked.

"It's about Allen-kun. About his spiritual energy, to be more precise. When I went in contact with it back at the palace, I did felt traces of Kanda's energy in it, but there was also something else, something which I failed to identify."

"What do you mean?" Komui inquired, frowning.

"I kept silent back they would let go of the boy, but there's something that doesn't belong to him in his energy, and I can't tell what it is. However, what I can tell is that it is not of human origin, and that's what worries me." the old man explained.

Komui remained silent for a few seconds, deep in thought, then sighed:

"Does Allen know about it?"

"I don't know. I think I should try to ask him about it, though it may only add some extra burden on him."

"I know he already has a lot to cope with, but at this point, we can't afford letting any strange phenomenon pass by. And..." Komui paused, searching for words. "I fear he has to be kept under watch until we know exactly the details about this. I don't like the idea of having him under surveillance but..."

"Then I'll watch over him." Tiedoll offered, and Komui's traits visibly relaxed.

"Please do."

* * *

"Hey, Kanda. If they hadn't intended to get me killed with a youkai, would you have seriously let me die?"

The demon merely glanced at Allen and didn't bother replying. Allen looked at his shikigami, unable to decipher his expression. It had been bothering him for a while. Since they had come back to the Temple, he couldn't erase Kanda's behaviour at the palace from his memory, and doubt had started making its way through his mind. He kept trying to convince himself that it had all been an act to deceive the priests, yet at the same time he had trouble believing it.

And that made Allen wonder again about his complicated relationship with his shikigami. For a short while, he had believed that Kanda actually felt something strong towards him; yet, the way the youkai could act proved him wrong.

"Kanda?" he insisted.

"You sure would have been less trouble dead than alive." the demon replied dryly.

"But you saved me from the fire."

"I already told you I saved you because I wanted to. The same way I could have wanted to let you die afterwards." Kanda replied, annoyed.

"I don't understand."

"Then I'll make it easier for you to understand: I act however I want to. If I want to save you, then I do. If I'd rather let you die, then I let you die."

It was only at that moment that Allen fully remembered that Kanda was a demon before being anything else, and a sad smile graced his lips. It was Kanda, after all.

* * *

Since the day of the raid, the atmosphere within the Temple had worsened around Allen. It was when he came back to the Temple that he realized how devastating the power of gossips could be.

Now, there wasn't a single day that passed without Allen hearing whispers behind his back, receiving disgusted looks from the newest students or contemptuous glances from the older ones. However, if each of them had various reactions towards Allen, there was one common point: the glimpse fear hidden behind their mighty attitude.

And today was no different. All day long, he could only deplore the number of people suddenly changing direction as they saw him coming, or the attention they paid to put as much distance as they could if they really had to cross path.

The only quiet time of the day was at night. Like tonight. Allen let out a small sigh of annoyance. Those behaviours were seriously eroding his nerves, and he could barely cope with the rising tension around him.

Every day was like a trial to test his mental resistance to being considered an outcast. Isolation was weighting on him a bit more every day, despite knowing that he could still count on his teachers – especially on Professor Tiedoll – to support him. Or if they didn't support him, at least they didn't reject him. Bookman was also one of the few people not to change his behaviour in Allen's presence, which wasn't that much of a consolation for him as he had hoped that Komui would have been part of those people. However, if his superior wasn't openly suspicious of him, he wasn't as friendly as before either.

Sometimes, he felt like letting all his frustration burst out and yelling at everyone that they were all a bunch of brainless goldfish, that he'd be more than happy to fry all those goldfish and feed them to youkai. Then, he would remember that it was exactly what he was expected to do.

It was on those dark thoughts that he reached his room. To him, it was an immense relief to get back to his room, the only place where he didn't have to worry about what he was, how he looked, nor what his shikigami was. As soon as he closed the wooden panel behind him, a new sigh escaped his lips, but it was a sigh of relief, relief to be able to enjoy the isolation of his room again.

He yawned, realizing how late he had stayed outside to clear his mind a bit, and suddenly felt seized by overwhelming tiredness. He walked to his futon and dropped onto it, not even bothering to get changed. Not far from him, a pair of cobalt eyes closed.

* * *

_Fingers pointing at him accusingly._

_People turning away from him._

"_Demon! Demon!" they repeat._

"_I'm not!" he answers desperately, though his voice doesn't seem to reach their ears._

"_No, you aren't. You're worse."_

"_I'm a human!"_

"_Your energy is tainted." a voice echoes._

"_Your body is tainted." another one adds._

_Blurry figures turning their backs at him._

_Going away from him._

_Leaving him alone._

_He's alone, but he can still hear voices clamouring 'Demon! Demon!'_

Allen woke up with a start, silver eyes wide-opened. His heart was thumping against his chest and he had to wait for a minute before it came back to its normal pace. He covered his eyes with one hand and sighed heavily. This was definitely not good for his mental health.

"Oi." Kanda's low voice almost made Allen jump. He sat up and tried to distinguish his shikigami in the darkness of the room.

"Ah, Kanda. Sorry if I woke you up." he said tiredly.

"Che. What's your problem this time?" Kanda asked with the most uncaring tone possible, though it didn't prevent Allen from smiling at the question.

The boy stood up and lit the lamp on.

"If those idiots bother you, just ignore them." Kanda stated, as if it was obvious. Again, Allen smiled. He didn't need to say anything for Kanda to understand perfectly what was wrong.

"I'm trying, Kanda. But it's hard to ignore them when they suspect you of being a demon that destroyed part of the city." Allen replied wearily as he went to sit next to Kanda, back leaning against the wall. "You know what they say? They say I'm an evil spirit which came to torture them once I find them off guard, that I'll start by erasing this Temple before targeting the palace, then I'll capture as many people as I can to offer them to the Earl to become his slaves. They say you're my servant and you'll help me spread destruction on this world, then..."

"Oi, give it a break." Kanda interrupted Allen, visibly irritated. "I'd rather turn deaf than hear anyone say I'm your servant."

"I suppose you would." Allen replied, chuckling.

Silence followed. The young Exorcist turned to face Kanda who had his eyes closed, and his gaze remained locked on his shikigami's face, lingering on each detail of his handsome features: thin eyebrows slightly frowned as if painted expertly with Indian ink, typical oriental eyes following a perfect slant, long strands of hair as dark as a moonless night... Allen felt his cheeks warming up.

Kanda was anything but nice towards him, the ever-cold face he always gave him was anything but gentle, the words coming out from his mouth were anything but kind; yet Allen could allow himself to drift off into the illusions that he could find all the comfort he sought in Kanda, simply through the indelible bond between them.

Before he even realized it, his heartbeat had increased and he had held out his hand to delicately slip his fingers in Kanda's ebony cascade of hair. Dark blue eyes opened at the touch and met with silver ones. They stared at each other, unblinking.

It was during that exchange that Allen become conscious of a fact that should have been obvious to him for a long time: he liked having Kanda's eyes on him, he liked the hunger that was slowly surfacing within those dark pupils, he liked the lack of restrictions that made Kanda press his lips against his without wasting another second, and above all, he liked yielding to Kanda's embrace.

Maybe it was only physical for Kanda, but as long as he was by Allen's side, then it was enough for the boy.

The black-haired youkai pulled Allen in his lap, lips still locked together, and slipped one arm around the boy's waist while his other hand cupped the back of his head. Allen gripped the collar of Kanda's kimono and pressed his shikigami against the wall, opening his mouth to invite him in, and Kanda obliged him right away.

If there was something Kanda had realized a long time ago, it was that he liked the soft whimpers he managed to elicit from Allen whenever his tongue rubbed against the boy's palate, he liked the small pants he could easily draw with a mere – though demanding – kiss, and above all, he liked how Allen kept asking for more. It wasn't hard to tell that Allen was releasing all his frustration on Kanda; the boy was strangely less passive than his usual self, which Kanda didn't really mind. He also didn't mind when he felt his master's lips on his neck, leaving fevered kisses all along before capturing his own lips again. Kanda smirked mentally; Allen was improving a lot when it came to acting according to his instinct.

The boy pulled back, panting, and looked at Kanda again, obviously waiting for him to do something. The youkai decided it was time for him to take matters in hand.

"I already told you your clothes are a pain." he stated.

Glaring at Kanda, Allen started removing every layer of clothes covering him while mentally agreeing with his shikigami. Next time, he'd make sure he'd have fewer clothes on him. There was an invisible force within him that was making him impatient to feel Kanda's touch on him, that was urging him to speed up and have Kanda take him, because he _longed_ for it. And now he wasn't even embarrassed to admit it. He wasn't even embarrassed when he saw the lust-filled stare Kanda was directing at him while trailing his eyes over the pale skin. In a way, having a creature such as Kanda desire him to such an extent was his pride. Kanda, powerful and feared for his powers, not human yet sharing traits that would make a lot of humans go green with jealousy; and it was Allen who was slowly fuelling his craving for him, no one else but Allen. However, as the Exorcist untied his belt and was ready to remove his kimono, Kanda stopped him.

"Let's not be in such a hurry, Moyashi." he said. Then he approached his mouth to Allen's ear and whispered: "I'll make you forget about those stupid rumours and show you how pitifully human you can be."

Those words sent shivers through Allen's spine and the only reply he could come with in his current state was: "Then make me."

Kanda didn't need to be told twice as he made Allen turn round and sit with his back against his chest. Then, before the boy had time to protest, he wrapped an arm around his waist and with his other hand, he reached between his legs. Kanda's sleeve tickled Allen's thigh, but the second his fingers made contact with Allen's member, the Exorcist tilted his head back on Kanda's shoulder, exhaling deeply. Kanda started sliding his hand along the organ, feeling it slowly getting erected between his fingers. Each of his movements earned him a 'Kanda!', or a gasp, or even a 'Oh gods...' when he knew where to touch; Allen was pressing his back against Kanda as much as possible, gripping tightly at the youkai's arm with both hands while trying to prevent the lower part of his body from rocking against Kanda's hand. Even with his unclear mind, he still wanted to show a minimum of self-control, no matter how hard it was, given the circumstances. Yet, that same body he was trying to control was protesting violently against his own will, seeking every ounce of pleasure it could obtain from the demon who was generously taking care of it.

The temperature was rising in the room, or maybe it was only Allen's imagination, but each of Kanda's movements on him were sending hot waves of pleasure through his whole body, quickening his pants and gasps. Both his arms were tightly gripping Kanda's one around his waist, as if he was trying to remain physically there while his mind had already started wandering in some other worlds.

Allen bit on his lower lip when Kanda made his kimono slide over his left shoulder and sank his teeth in the white skin, at the junction of the neck and the collarbone. The boy barely had time to feel the pain as Kanda's warm mouth started sucking on the skin; and also because he was far more focused on the pleasure that was converging at the pit of his stomach, threatening to make him reach his limits a bit too soon. It was as if Kanda knew exactly which spots to tease to make each part of Allen's remaining sanity shatter, leaving him at the mercy of anything Kanda could do to him. Words and sounds kept escaping Allen's lips in an incoherent flow that was terribly arousing for Kanda; and the latter suspected Allen to do it on purpose, the damn brat.

"How long do you think you can last like this, Moyashi?" he whispered at the boy's ear again, but the only answer he got was another long moan. The second after, his hand was covered with a creamy fluid, and he felt Allen relaxing against him while trying to get his breath back.

"Oi, don't you dare think I'm done with you already. We're nowhere near the end." Kanda said. And to prove his point, he spread one of Allen's legs on the side and plunged his hand even deeper in between, to the boy's entrance. Allen gasped at the touch and his whole body tensed again.

"Kanda..." he called out between two pants.

The youkai rested his chin on Allen's shoulder, and his lips brushed on the boy's cheek as he spoke:

"You can feel it, right?" he asked huskily. "You can feel my want for you, can't you?"

Allen nodded, still panting. How could he not feel it? The obvious bulge that was pressing at the bottom of his back was only waiting to be deeply welcomed inside of him. The mere thought of it made his body tremble in excitement. He raised one hand to Kanda's face and turned it so they were facing each other, and joined their lips together once more, biting, licking and fighting with unsuspected aggressiveness from Allen's part. Now Kanda was sure of it; Allen was fed up with keeping all his negative emotions in and had finally chosen to let them out by using Kanda as a catalyst. Which was perfectly fine to Kanda's tastes.

The demon grunted as Allen drew a drop of blood from his lip and decided it was more than time to get serious; he couldn't allow the boy to take the lead. Allen jolted when a finger intruded in him, before relaxing a bit to allow his body to get used to the preparation. Kanda mentally decreed that he could afford speeding that part up as it was Allen's third time already, and the boy soon found himself being stretched at a rather quick pace matching with the ragged pants that were escaping through his swollen lips. Bent over his shoulder, Kanda noticed the reawakening of Allen's arousal and had to fight the urge to make him release once more with his hand only. In his lap, Allen was almost squirming impatiently, and he wondered how Kanda managed to keep a semblance of control when it was so obvious that he was already at the peak of his pleasure, given the insistent bulge pressing against his back.

And as an answer to his silent question, Kanda removed his fingers and opened his kimono before lifting Allen a bit by the waist. Allen felt Kanda's erection at his entrance and felt the urge to let himself drop on it, though he quickly changed his mind as he wasn't really keen on hurting himself by acting on an impulse. Instead, he supported himself by putting a hand on the ground and waited for Kanda to slowly push him down. He winced a bit when he felt Kanda entering him, but his mind was soon taken over by waves of pleasure and his vision turned blank when his shikigami started moving him up, then down again. His reason had drifted so far away from this world that he barely heard Kanda talking to him:

"Look at me." he breathed.

With difficulty, Allen turned his head on the side and Kanda almost came at the erotic sight of that flushed face, lips partly open, hazy silver eyes looking at him with nothing but want. A strong desire for the boy seared through him and he unconsciously sent a wave of energy to Allen, which seemed to snap him out of his torpor.

"Kanda!" he called out as the familiar warmth spread throughout his entire body.

"Moyashi..." Kanda managed to articulate. For the first time, he was reaching a point where he could barely keep control of his own reactions. "Move by yourself." he ordered between two pants.

If Allen was surprised by those words, he didn't show it. He slowly nodded, then put his lips on Kanda's as if to gather courage before using his hand to lift himself up and sitting back down. It was the first time he had to do it by himself, and it was requiring more effort than what he had reckoned. He repeated the action again, trying to find a decent pace for both him and Kanda, though the latter's pants clearly indicated that any pace was fine to him.

Allen was in no state to think clearly anymore, far too drowned into the pool of bliss that each thrust was filling endlessly. The demon hadn't lied to him; at that instant, Allen was feeling more human than ever. The burning desire, the desperate need he had for Kanda could only belong to a human.

He was human, and he was sinning with a demon. Did it make him less human? The question was pointless now, for if sinning was always that pleasurable, then he'd gladly give up his humanity for the sole sake of being with Kanda.

The black-haired youkai had both his arms tightly wrapped against Allen, his chin resting on Allen's shoulder, and was losing himself in the hot tightness rubbing around his member. To tell the truth, he hadn't expected such a stamina from Allen, yet, right now, the boy was showing him what he was capable of doing whenever he lifted all the restrictions those human beings were so fond of. And it was far from being unpleasant. Through the fabric of Kanda's sleeves, Allen could feel the heat of the demon's skin, and it reminded him that next time, he'd asked Kanda to remove his kimono.

Allen pushed down one last time before feeling Kanda's release in him, and the warm spurt immediately made him follow his shikigami while his lips let out a last 'Kanda!'. Then he finally allowed his body to fully relax against Kanda's chest that was heaving at each of his breathing. He tilted his head back on Kanda's shoulder and closed his eyes, panting, still under the effects of his euphoria. Kanda's arms were now loosely wrapped around him, and he rested his hands on his shikigami's. His fingers wandered on the wrist on which the bracelet was, and a faint smile appeared on his lips.

The first thing Allen had done when they had come back from the palace – after treating his wounds – was to repair the bracelet. And since there hadn't been any string close at hand, he had taken a string from one of the robe he used to wear before becoming an Exorcist.

Now, the only sounds in the room were those of the two taking their breath back. Neither Kanda nor Allen pronounced a word during several minutes, as both were trying to recover their senses. It was only after a long and quiet moment that Allen finally spoke:

"Hey, Kanda."

"..."

"Why do you sleep with me if you despise humans so much?" he asked bluntly.

"Why do you sleep with me if you despise demons so much?" Kanda asked back with an equal tone.

There was a second of silence.

"Because I wasn't strong enough to resist." Allen replied. _'But I don't mind bearing such a weakness.'_ he added to himself.

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Here you are! I hope this chapter made up for making you wait a whole month.... And fortunately I managed to update this before exams start... Thank you all for your support, it really means a lot to me.

And for those who want to see **fanarts** of Shikigami, feel free to check my profile, I put links to fanarts that some of you were nice enough to draw (thank you so much!) and some that I did myself. I'll put some more whenever I have time!


	20. Resignation and arrival

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

A/N: A heated beginning for this chapter, because I was in the mood for it :D Be warned: this chapter is a very lame filler...

* * *

**Chapter 20 - Resignation and arrival  
**

The spiked-haired girl, perched on a tree, shut her eyes and focused her mind on the world surrounding her, letting every vibration, every fluctuation of energy activate her senses. Once more, she made an attempt at locating Kanrou's energy.

Seconds passed, then minutes. Oblivious to the breeze cooling her face, the ruffling of the leaves or the distant noises of the city, Road thoroughly scanned every inch of the area.

Nothing. Out of frustration, she punched the trunk and swore.

"Damn it. Just where the hell are you, and what are you plotting?" she muttered.

* * *

The first thing Allen noticed when he woke up was that he was lying comfortably in his futon, despite he was positive he had fell asleep in another place. In Kanda's arms, more precisely.

The boy sat up, letting the thin blanket slide on his bare skin, and his eyes met with Kanda's gaze. The demon was sitting beside him, not moving even a single finger while his dark blue eyes lingered on Allen's exposed chest with a strange glint which meaning was no more unknown to the Exorcist. Feigning ignorance, the latter looked away, searching for his clothes.

"It's been a while since we last got news from Lavi and the others. I wonder if they're doing fine." he commented casually as he held out his hand to pick his robe.

"Moyashi." Kanda's low voice sent a shiver through Allen's spine, though he tried to keep acting as normally as possible. It was simply surprising him to no end how receptive to Kanda he could be since he had fully opened himself to his shikigami.

"What is it?" he asked, still pretending to be completely oblivious of the situation.

However, the moment Kanda seized him by the waist and pushed him back down on the futon, Allen couldn't keep the act anymore. And when his shikigami buried his face in the crook of his neck and he felt a tongue making contact with his skin, he couldn't help but gasp as his body jolted.

"Kanda! What are you d…"

"There's still frustration in you. Let me release it for you." Kanda replied as his hand slipped under the blanket and reached down between Allen's legs.

"You… that's not… Kanda, stop this!" Allen managed to articulate despite the new stimulation he was receiving from Kanda. "This isn't the time to b… ngh… Kanda! Are you listening to me?" he asked, failing at sounding irritated.

The demon paused, then crossed Allen's gaze. The boy was already slightly panting and obviously trying to keep his composure, which made Kanda smirk inwardly.

"What's wrong, Moyashi?" he asked, pleased to see the faint blush painting Allen's cheeks.

"It's just that… we just did it yesterday and… and…" the boy could feel his will wavering as if Kanda's mere gaze was enough to erase any certainty in him.

"You're not convincing at all, Moyashi." Kanda stated.

"W-well, you're the one to blame! I'm just not ready to do it again yet."

"Then let me please you in another way."

"Wha-"

Allen didn't have time to finish his sentence as his mouth was captured by Kanda's. He emitted a vague sound of protest that immediately died in his throat when his shikigami started going down his neck, then his chest, then his navel, then down again, and even more down… to a place he didn't suspected. Needless to say, Allen wasn't used to having such a high amount of pleasure rushing at him so quickly, and he was soon overtaken by a wave of dizziness that rendered him unable to bear any coherent thought.

He had never imagined that Kanda's lips would someday taste _that_ part of him; therefore, the moment he felt a sudden hotness wrapping his member, his heart failed a beat and he had to press both hands over his mouth to prevent a too loud gasp from escaping. _'Gods, Kanda is… Kanda is… Gods, this can't be…'_ he mentally repeated over and over again. He didn't want to look at Kanda yet, at what he was doing, it was simply too… sudden. Embarrassment and bliss were conflicting within him, as it was the first time he got to experience such a service from his shikigami. And while he was too busy still trying to record what was happening, Kanda was slowly bringing him to his limits, using his tongue on the sensitive parts of Allen's member and tasting every inch of skin he could. Every time he heard a louder whimper from Allen, he knew he was hitting on a particularly vulnerable spot.

It was obvious the boy hadn't expected this at all, given the way his body was squirming under Kanda's care. The youkai pressed a firm hand on Allen's trembling thigh while slowing down his ministrations on the boy in order to let him enjoy his pleasure a bit longer. However, to Allen, it was getting close to torture. Kanda wasn't even touching any other part of his body, yet his whole being was seized by a surge of pleasure that was particularly violent in Allen's lower area.

"Kan…da… I can't… hold back…" he said between two pants, his eyes on Kanda. The sight of his shikigami between his legs and taking him in his mouth was unbearable for his poor remains of self-control. With a last spasm, he released his seed inside Kanda's mouth. He lay on the futon, immobile but for his breathing before slowly sitting up. His eyes widened in shock when he saw the youkai wiping a thin trail of liquid from his mouth with the back of his hand. Kanda smirked at the boy's reaction:

"What is it?" he asked.

"You… Did you… swallow…" Allen stuttered, getting even more embarrassed and feeling his blood rushing to his face. The smirk on Kanda's face widened. The second after, his lips were sealed on Allen's, and the Exorcist immediately felt a strange taste in his mouth; his own taste. He quickly pulled back with a wince, not daring to meet Kanda's eyes as he knew the youkai wouldn't miss the opportunity to make fun of his reactions.

"You taste good." he commented, observing Allen with a certain satisfaction as the boy turned even redder.

"Stop saying things like that! It's… it's… oh, never mind." Allen gave up, shaking his head. It was no use trying to apply a human standard reasoning in a demon's head after all. With a sigh, he grabbed his clothes and started dressing, trying to recover from his rather heated waking.

No matter how hard he tried to hide it, the frustration and the weariness that affected him because of his isolation towards the other people of the Temple was still present, like an unceasing feeling gnawing at him inwardly. He kept telling himself that having Kanda by his side was everything he needed; yet, a tiny party of him was still not convinced. Why couldn't he satisfy himself with Kanda only? Why did he feel as if there was a void somewhere?

_Because you're a human. And he's a demon._

The answer was obvious, and it displeased Allen. Kanda was a demon, therefore his way of thinking was different. Yes, he could give Allen protection, support, and pleasure. The bond between them was stronger than any other bond he could have created with anyone else. Yet, Allen couldn't help but ask for more; he needed something more from Kanda, and what distressed him was to know that he wouldn't be able to get it, because Kanda was a demon.

A glance at his shikigami showed him that the latter was silently staring at him with his dark eyes, and for a second, Allen got the feeling that Kanda was able to read his thoughts simply through that mere visual contact. He quickly averted the gaze, saying:

"I'll go see how Lenalee's doing."

As he shut the panel behind him, he failed to hear Kanda's words.

"Che. If you really don't care about what people think about you, then act accordingly, stupid Moyashi."

* * *

Lavi opened his single eye and blinked several times, trying to discern his current location. He was lying on something soft, there was a roof above his head; which meant he wasn't outside. A second analysis showed him that he had to be in a temple, in one of the healing rooms. He made an attempt at moving, but his whole body protested as pain seared through him.

"Gods… What the hell happened?" he muttered in his breath. Vague memories slowly came back to him, blurry, uncertain, and started patching together to reconstruct the events that had brought him to this place. A boring trip, a rather desert land, another Exorcist and two shikigami as his only company, and then, a spiritual energy suddenly sprouting up from nowhere...

Lavi's eye widened as a succession of events swept over his memory, reminding him very clearly what had brought him to this place...

"_Good evening, dear Exorcist." the youkai greeted Lavi warmly. "I think I heard you complaining that you were bored so how about we enjoy ourselves a bit?" he suggested, his smile widening._

"_Who are you?" the redhead asked, on his guards._

"_I just happened to be as bored as you are, and thought it'd be nice to have some fun together. My name's Tyki. It's a pleasure to meet you." the said Tyki replied as he bowed elegantly._

"_What's your purpose here?" Lavi went on dryly. Something was telling him that, despite the youkai's civilized manners, there was something really suspicious about it; which was confirmed a second later as a swarm of black butterflies materialized suddenly behind the youkai's back, forming an eerie dark cloud._

"_As I said, I'd like to have some fun with you two." Tyki replied. "Please entertain me." he added, and without another warning, the army of insects rushed at the two Exorcists who quickly dismounted and protected themselves with a barrier._

"_This isn't going to work." Tyki commented quietly._

_To Lavi and Suman's surprise, the butterflies flew through the barrier and were ready to attack the Exorcists, when a huge flame coming from the side forced the insects to stop._

"_Woah! Thanks Nishiko!" Lavi exclaimed._

"_You're welcome. You two do something about that Tyki guy, Saryo and I will take care of the butterflies!" the shikigami replied._

_Suman's shikigami, a huge wolf with pure white fur, growled loudly and bared its fangs. Nishiko knew it was best not to get too close to Saryo, for its fangs and claws both contained a powerful poison, able to kill in a matter of seconds. The fox-like youkai was using its flames to kill the flying creatures, but it seemed there was no end to them, which was particularly irritating._

_Meanwhile, Lavi and Suman were fighting Tyki, but the damn youkai was quick and kept avoiding their attacks gracefully, which was starting to get on Lavi's nerves. Why wasn't the demon attacking? Instead, he – no, it – merely dodged every single spell the two Exorcists cast on it._

"_What the hell is wrong with this youkai?" Suman asked, visibly pissed off. "He isn't attacking at all!"_

"_Yeah, I wonder what he's waiting for." Lavi replied. "But don't let your guard down, Suman."_

"_I know that." the older Exorcist replied as he made another attempt at immobilizing Tyki._

"_My, my. Can't you do better than that?" the demon asked while dodging the spell. "I must say I'm pretty disappointed in you. Well, I suppose not every one of you can be on the same level as Allen Walker."_

"_Allen? What does Allen have to do with this?" Lavi asked, then realization soon hit him. "You're one of the Earl's followers." he said darkly. At those words, the demon gave a broad smile that sent shivers running down both Exorcists' spines._

Lavi shut his eye. He could remember the scene perfectly. It was at that moment that everything had gone wrong. Terribly wrong.

_In a blink of an eye, Tyki wasn't at his spot anymore and the second after he was only a few inches away from Suman who barely had time to see the demon coming at him._

"_Suman!" Lavi called out, and widened his unpatched eye in horror when he saw Tyki plunging a full arm in his friend's chest._

_Time froze for both Exorcists, and even the two shikigami stopped moving for a second though Nishiko quickly tried to focus back on its own battle. However, Saryo was still immobile, eyes locked on its master while the fox shikigami was calling its name to remind it it wasn't the time to get distracted._

"_Suman!" Lavi called again, not daring to make a single move. Then, he noticed something strange: there was no blood whatsoever, and the older Exorcist didn't look like he just had his chest pierced by Tyki's hand. He was simply frowning and looking at the arm that had disappeared in him, as if he couldn't believe his own eyes. Lavi stepped forward, but was immediately stopped by the demon's voice:_

"_It would be wiser for you not to move, otherwise I may accidentally crush your comrade's heart." he said sweetly._

"_What?" Lavi asked in disbelief. A closer look at Suman showed him that the man's face was now tense, his breathing ragged and that he was putting every effort not to make the slightest move. Then he finally spoke, though slowly and by moving his lips as little as possible:_

"_He-his hand's on my heart. I can… feel it."_

"_Indeed, my dear Exorcist. And now the question is: would you like me to give you a quick and almost painless death, or should I enjoy myself a bit with you?" Now Tyki's tone had changed from suave to a sadistic one. Even his traits had darkened, his charming smile turning into an eerie smirk, eyes filled with a nasty glint._

"_Suman!" a loud growl came out from nowhere._

_It was Suman's shikigami, which had rushed to its master for help and was growling threateningly at Tyki. Behind the youkai, Nishiko was still dealing with the butterflies while trying to glance every second at the scene, at the risk of letting the insects come too close._

"_So, what do you choose, Exorcist?" Tyki asked again. "Or maybe you want me to choose for you?"_

"_You damn… let him go!" Lavi ordered, hands forming a seal._

"_I don't think you are in any position to order me around." Tyki replied coolly. "Unless you don't care about what could happen to your friend. For instance, if I do this…"_

_A second later, Suman let out a cry of pain and flinched, though he didn't fall on the ground because of Tyki's arm that was still plunged in his chest. Then blood spilled out from his mouth._

"_Suman!" Lavi called again, absolutely helpless._

"_Get away… from here, Lavi." the other Exorcist said with difficulty. "Hurry up."_

"_I'm not gonna let you die here!"_

"_I'm already… done for… so…"_

"_It's exactly as this man said." Tyki intruded casually in the conversation. "And you'll be the next one." he added to Lavi, who could only greet his teeth and clench his shaking fists._

"_Lavi… go… I'll keep him busy f…" Suman started, but Tyki tightened his grip on his heart once more, making him spit blood again._

"_You won't be able to do a thing, Exorcist." the demon said with cold amusement._

_Lavi couldn't decide on what to do at that moment. If he fled, he'd never be able to forgive himself. If he stayed, he wouldn't be able to do anything. Torn apart by a choice he couldn't make, he barely felt something roughly pulling his arm until a pair of canine teeth sank into his skin. With a yelp, he looked at what had bitten him:_

"_Nishiko! Wh…"_

"_We don't have time to waste here. We must do as Suman says and leave. Now." the shikigami said hurriedly._

"_We can't!"_

"_We have to inform the temple! Lavi, I know it's hard but we can't beat this guy! Even the butterflies are a pain for me!" Nishiko went on with a desperate voice. And with the side of its body, the youkai prompted Lavi to mount, but the Exorcist was still stunned on his spot. The swarm of insects was already flying to them at a dangerous speed.  
_

"_Suman…"_

"_Lavi! Get out of here!" the other Exorcist yelled. "I'll keep the demon busy! Hurry up!"_

"_And what do you think you can do to me?" Tyki asked sweetly._

_Suman didn't reply. Instead, he locked his gaze on Tyki's and grabbed the arm piercing his chest with both his hands, then started uttering something. Lavi didn't have time to see what was next as Nishiko literally kicked him in the stomach, cutting his breath._

That was the last thing Lavi remembered. For a whole minute, he cursed his shikigami for rendering him unconscious and kept telling himself that he could have done something to help Suman, he could have saved him somehow… What had happened to Suman anyway? Lavi couldn't bring himself to think the Exorcist was dead; he had to be alive. And Tyki? Lavi clenched his fists at the memory of that demon. One of the Earl's followers. And one that had already met with Allen. Why hadn't Allen said anything about such a powerful demon? If he hadn't kept silent, then perhaps they'd have been better prepared to face Tyki, and things wouldn't have turned into this disaster.

A profusion of incoherent thoughts flowed into Lavi's head. There had to be someone responsible for what had happened, and his dizzy mind wandered from his shikigami to Allen, and at some point, he even wanted to blame Komui for sending them out.

A violent headache seized him, and the latter decided to have a break in his tortuous reasoning to let sleep take over him as he closed his valid eye with a sigh.

* * *

Allen was standing in front of Komui's desk, immobile and speechless, not believing what the man had just told him. It couldn't be true, could it? Yet, given Komui's miserable face and how dejected he looked, there was no way it could be a joke.

"Lavi… where is he now?" the Exorcist finally managed to ask with a trembling voice.

"He's being taken care of at the temple he was supposed to go to. The other survivors are also being treated by other temples." Komui replied.

"How many… survivors are there?" Allen asked, though he feared the answer.

"Out of the nine we sent out, five. It's not like we didn't expect an attack, but…" Komui's voice died in his throat, unable to go on. After a few seconds of silence, he resumed talking: "The letters I received from the temples are very succinct, and we'll have to wait for more details."

"How about the guardians of the pillars? They still haven't been exorcised, have they?"

"Out of the four guardians, only two have been exorcised. The other temples are waiting for the Exorcists who survived to recover enough to finish their job." Komui paused, then went on: "However, there's still something wrong. Even with two pillars only, the energy that flows throughout our lands should have become less hectic. But the reports I received mentioned that not only did the disruption not lessen, but it's spreading more and more."

Allen nodded distractedly, as if he had never really believed that something could have turned well. At some point, it felt like all of them were progressing on a slippery slope that threatened their precarious semblance of balance at any time. It seemed that everything they undertook was bound to go wrong. In a way, Allen had the impression to be slowly sinking a bit more every day in a bottomless chasm with no hope to escape.

"Does Lenalee know about it?" he inquired.

Komui sighed, then shook his head.

"Not yet. I don't know how to tell her, especially when Raphaelle isn't part of the survivors. I know they were good friends, and I can't imagine how she's going to react when I tell her that one of her friends died. Especially after the loss of her shikigami." he said, dejected.

"I was about to go see her. Would you like me to try?" Allen offered though he had no idea on how to tell Lenalee either.

"I'd appreciate it a lot, but I don't want to put this burden on you. You already have enough to cope with lately, haven't you?" Komui replied, and he allowed a weak smile to appear on his lips. "It's been hard on you to be suspected of being a demon, am I wrong?"

Not expecting the conversation to take such a direction, Allen remained silent for a second before speaking:

"It's been like this for years, I'm used to it." he gave his usual reply almost automatically.

"But it's been getting worse and worse. Don't think I didn't notice it, Allen. Unfortunately, there isn't much I can do about it, especially with all these youkai attacks. I can only ask you to keep it up and help us as much as you can." Komui added with a sympathizing tone.

Or at least, it sounded sympathizing. The white-haired boy couldn't help but remember Kanda's words about everyone suspecting him, including his superior, and for some reason, Komui's words didn't sound right. Or maybe it was Allen's imagination that was getting too twisted. In any case, he didn't have anything to answer Komui; that's why he merely nodded and asked permission to leave.

As he stepped outside the room, he stopped for a moment, unsure as whether to go and visit Lenalee or go talk to Kanda first. Then, shaking his head, he headed for his room. Lately, Allen noticed, he had been less and less willing to spend some time with anyone but Kanda; in a way, he wanted to avoid people while paradoxically wishing that they'd stop rejecting him because of what they thought he was.

Allen kept telling himself that having Kanda by his side was all he needed, yet deep inside him, a part of him still longed for the warmth of a human company. Was there something wrong in seeking relationships with those of the same kind? _But they don't even consider me a human._ Allen thought humourlessly before sighing.

There were more urgent matters right now than his petty socializing issues. While walking back to his room, he started thinking intensely about the news Komui had given him, so deep in thought that he barely noticed where he was walking. Exorcists had died. Probably killed by the Earl's followers, according to the vague descriptions in the letters Komui had received. And the flow of energy was still disrupted. Which meant even more berserk youkai and shik…

"Oi."

Allen almost jumped at the familiar voice and raised his eyes. Kanda was leaning against the wall, crossed-arm.

"What are you doing outside?" the Exorcist asked before realizing it was a pretty pointless question.

"Che. Your energy is so troubled it gives me a headache. What's the problem now?" Kanda asked. Allen was almost certain that his shikigami pretended to sound as indifferent as possible, which made him chuckle inwardly.

"Hey, Kanda." he went on instead of replying him immediately. "I want to go sit on the rooftop. Take me there?"

The black-haired youkai cocked an eyebrow, visibly not expecting the request, then merely shrugged before seizing Allen by the waist and scooping him up, and in one swift jump, both of them found themselves on the roof of the building. Allen sat down, careful not to lose his balance on the sloping surface and let the cool breeze hit his face, eyes closed. Next to him, the light rustle of fabric indicated him that Kanda had taken a sit as well. Allen remained there, not moving, forgetting for a moment the burdens on his mind, and merely enjoying the semblance of peace he was offered. Opening his eyes, he suddenly realized it was the first time he was given such a view of the Temple. From that height, he felt free, as if he didn't belong to the Temple anymore. It'd take a few steps only to get out of that place, walk away never to look back again, and to forget each of the worries that beset his mind. The thought sent chills throughout his body. It was so tempting to give everything up; however, it wasn't in Allen's nature to be carefree and stay put when he was needed.

Needed? Was he still needed? Or was it only sheer suspicion that was prevailing in most people's hearts?

"Moyashi. I don't plan to wait here eternally." Kanda's sharp voice rose, interrupting the boy's thoughts.

"Sorry, Kanda." Allen replied softly. "You want to know what happened? Well, I've received some news from Komui. They are not what you could call good news." he added as he pulled his knees to his chest and leant his forehead against them.

Allen started reporting everything he had been told, his voice hoarse by a lump in his throat as he spoke. When he was done, Kanda remained silent – not that Allen expected him to say anything anyway – as if he hadn't listened to a word of what had been said.

"Do you have any idea why it isn't working?" the boy made an attempt at starting a conversation. "I mean, why is the global energy still chaotic?"

"Don't ask me that. I'm a demon, not a priest."

"I just thought you'd…"

At that moment, a male voice rose inside the temple:

"Uro! What are you doing!" There was a hint of panic in the voice.

Allen stood up abruptly, almost losing his balance, and turned to Kanda:

"It's coming from the left wing of the Temple! Take me down, Kanda, I'm going to see what's happening."

The demon obeyed with a grunt, and both of them ran towards the direction where the voice was coming. As Allen turned at the corner of a building, he stopped dead and his eyes widened.

In front of him, on the ground, the remnants of a youkai were turning to dust. An Exorcist was kneeling not far from there, unmoving, eyes locked on the spot where the youkai had just disappeared, his face looking dumb.

"Daisya-san!" Allen called as he ran to the man. Hearing his name, the latter slowly turned his head towards the boy and glared at him.

"You…" Daisya started with a low voice. "How dare you show your faked sympathizing face here?"

Allen stopped dead, a confused look on his face.

"You, the Earl, your alleged shikigami!" Daisya barked as he pointed his finger to Kanda. "You're the ones responsible for this! You killed Uro! How many more shikigami do you have to kill before you're satisfied, huh? First Lenalee's, then mine, then who else's? You shouldn't even be allowed to live in the Temple! Why does Komui let you live here? Why d…"

Before he had time to finish, a strangled noise escaped his mouth and he collapsed on the ground. Allen had barely time to understand what had just happened. A second before, Kanda was still beside him, and the second after, he was right behind Daisya.

"Kanda! You didn't have to knock him out!" Allen said reproachfully as he hurried towards the older Exorcist, knelt down and lifted the man's head.

"Che, he was getting annoying." Kanda merely declared.

"Still, there was no reason for you to…"

"Allen!"

The boy raised his head towards the one calling him. It was Komui, followed by Tiedoll, who were hastening to come to Allen.

"What happened?" the Chinese man asked, slightly out of breath. "Why is Daisya unconscious?"

Allen didn't reply. Instead, his gaze drifted towards the ground, at the spot where some tiny, shiny particles could still be seen. Komui and Tiedoll followed his gaze, and silence fell on them as they understood immediately. The old man shook his head, obviously very affected by the incident. Looking at him, Allen remembered that Daisya was – for some reason – one of Tiedoll's favourite former pupils, and it was normal that such a tragedy concerned him so much.

Komui sighed heavily, his traits as tired as ever.

"We need to stop this. We can't let any other shikigami die because of some twisted spell the Earl cast." he said with a determination that contrasted sharply with his apparent tiredness.

Allen couldn't do anything else but nod, trying to ignore the hurtful words Daisya had addressed him.

* * *

Road barely dared to move under the intimidating Earl's aura.

"I am disappointed, my dear Road." the Earl said with a semblance of coolness that failed to veil his dissatisfaction. "You lost track of Kanrou who was supposed to be kept under tight surveillance, and you waited all that time before telling me?"

"I-I thought I could find him." the demon girl replied apologetically. "Unfortunately, it seems my skills weren't enough."

"Indeed. Now I'm sure you must realize that this is problematic as we have no idea what plan he might pull to reach his goal."

"I sent some youkai out to gather information about where Kanrou may be right now." Road said tentatively.

"I doubt those lowly creatures will be able to find anything. It is Kanrou we are talking about, not a mere youkai." the Earl replied. "Anyway, we have some other priorities now. I want to go see my poor Tyki-pon."

Road nodded, too happy to have avoided the Earl's wrath.

They were living in a huge mansion that formerly belonged to a human general but was now abandoned, and a powerful charm set by Lulubell was enough to prevent humans and most youkai from detecting the building. Right now, the Earl was walking in a corridor, followed by Road, and stopped when he arrived in front of a huge, wooden door. He opened it, and stepped in.

The room was large, and a body was lying in the middle, surrounded by two youkai with human appearances which were taking care of the body.

"Out." the Earl ordered, and the two youkai vanished immediately. The demon stepped closer to the lying form and sat down on a cushion next to it. Road remained standing, looking concerned.

"Tyki-pon." the Earl called softly.

Tyki slowly opened his eyes and turned his head to the Earl with difficulty.

"H-hey, Earl." he managed to articulate with some effort. His breathing was irregular, his face sweat-drenched and each word was making him wince in pain.

"Tyki-pon, you have been pretty reckless back there."

"I… know." he replied with a small chuckle that immediately made him hiss.

"How is your injury doing?" the Earl asked sweetly.

"See… for yourself…" Tyki replied between two pants. "But it's not… a nice view."

Ignoring the warning, the Earl delicately removed the blanket covering Tyki's body, and Road had to press both her hands over her mouth to muffle the gasp that escaped from her. Tyki was missing his whole right arm up to above his elbow. A bloody bandage was hiding the stump, but small scarlet drops were still dripping from it.

"I underestimated… that damn Exorcist…" Tyki explained with a disgusted look. "He took my arm with him… when I killed him… Didn't think… he'd have the guts to… sever my arm while… having his heart… crushed to bits…"

"Uncle Tyki, stop talking now. You need rest." Road intervened with an almost pleading voice.

"Heh… when I get better… I'll kill the other Exorcist… too." the demon added before exhaustion took over him and he fell asleep.

The Earl remained silent for a few seconds, then he called:

"Lulubell."

A black cat moved out of the shadows from a corner of the room, and the second after, a tall, dark-skinned woman dressed in a red kimono was standing in front of the Earl.

"I will stay here for a while. Be sweet enough to bring me some tea. Road, you are free to do whatever you want for now, though I suggest you keep looking for Kanrou's whereabouts."

The two demons nodded and left the room. A minute after, the door was opened again, but it wasn't Lulubell.

"Earl, I have a report from our sentries."

"Any good news, Sheryl?" the Earl asked.

"Not really." the youkai replied gloomily. "They spotted Exorcist Cross Marian in _that_ area."

The Earl didn't miss the stress on the word, but didn't react immediately either. His gaze still hadn't left Tyki's sleeping form, and he looked deep in thought.

"When you say 'that area', you mean…" he paused.

"Yes, Earl. The mountain."

The Earl cursed silently. He hated Cross Marian. Oh, how he hated that sneaky man…

* * *

Somewhere around the city, a long, scarlet-haired man sneezed. A smile graced his lips as he saw the Temple of the Black Order standing in front of him.

"I'm finally home. Heh, Komui's gonna kill me for sure after all this time." he said.

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And another chapter done! Tell me what you think? I still can't thank you all enough for your support; I really appreciate it!  
And many thanks again for those of you who offered me to draw fanarts of this story! Links are all in my profile :)


	21. Mnemosyne

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man is H. Katsura's property.

* * *

**Chapter 21 - Mnemosyne  
**

Since the last incident with Daisya's shikigami, things were getting worse and worse for Allen. The whole next day passed with people openly pointing at him and saying out loud that he was the cause of Uro's death. Incomprehension was filling the atmosphere inside the Temple as most students couldn't fathom why Allen was still allowed to move freely along with his shikigami. Another rumour had also started spreading: that Kanda wasn't actually a true shikigami, but an ancient demon which had come to wreck havoc among humans and youkai, and it didn't make things easier for Allen. He had no idea where that rumour came from though he couldn't help but suspect a few teachers of having investigated about him.

And rumours were as rampant as wild and uncontrolled fire. Allen's daily life was getting less and less bearable, not because of the people who were avoiding him like the plague – those were a majority and didn't really bother him – but because of the few reckless ones who kept finding every opportunity to irritate him. Like on the previous day, when he had found the white Exorcist robe he had put to wash in tatters. Or during meal time, when he was about to help himself with his favourite food only to find out that some students – who usually never ate those kind of food – had been quicker than him, leaving empty dishes behind them.

And Kanda didn't really help Allen. The one time when the boy came back to his room, hair and costume drenched by the grace of a bucket discharged on him , the youkai merely snorted in disdain, though Allen couldn't tell if the feeling was directed at him or at those who had done this to him.

Humiliation. Frustration. He held great powers in him, yet he wasn't allowed to use them to teach those stupid humans a lesson. Sometimes, he would punch the wooden wall of his room out of anger, silently cursing those who dared look down on him, and the next second, he would be shocked at himself for bearing thoughts that were unpleasantly similar to Kanda's. To a demon's.

Allen shook his head, trying to forget even momentarily all the repressed anger that was building up within him. Right now, he was heading for Tiedoll's office because the old man had called him there for some reason. As he knocked on the door, a quick glance on the side showed him that a few students were hidden behind a corner, observing him – or rather, spying on him. It was pissing him off. _'A bunch of idiots.'_ he thought. He glared at them, satisfied as they quickly ran off, confused at being found out so easily. Allen was showing less and less signs of patience; instead he didn't hesitate to show anyone who annoyed him that he was ready to pick a fight at any time; but usually, a mere glare was enough.

"Come in." Allen heard Tiedoll's voice on the other side of the panel and went in. "Ah! Allen-kun, I'm glad to see you." he greeted with his usual kind smile.

For an unknown reason, Tiedoll was about the only one with Nine not to give a damn about all the spreading rumours.

"What did you call me here for, Professor?" Allen asked politely as he sat down in front of his teacher.

"I'd like to talk to you about something that's been bothering me for a while now. You told us that some of Kanda's energy was accidentally mixed with yours, is that correct?" Tiedoll asked bluntly.

"It is, Professor."

"Apart from that incident, did anything else happen to you during any of your requests? I mean, something abnormal."

Allen could tell that Tiedoll was trying his best not to sound inquisitive, and the worried traits on the old man's face strengthened Allen's belief that Tiedoll was on his side.

"No, I don't think so, Professor." Allen replied truthfully after a few seconds of reflexion.

"Is that so?" Tiedoll said, slightly disappointed. "Are you sure that nothing happened that could have had some effects on your energy?"

The young Exorcist frowned, trying to remember each of his requests, but nothing came to him. He shook his head.

"No, Professor. I can't recall anything that could be qualified as abnormal. May I know if there's something wrong with my energy?"

Tiedoll seemed to hesitate a bit, then spoke:

"Actually, back at the palace, I detected traces of Kanda's energy in yours, but I also sensed something else that I believe do not belong to your energy."

"What is that something? Someone else's energy?" Allen asked, confused.

"Unfortunately, I wasn't able to identify its nature. I'm not even sure that it's a normal spiritual energy but I may have been mistaken back then. Don't worry Allen, this is only a minor detail, and I certainly do not believe that you have any connection with what's happening right now." Tiedoll said reassuringly. "However, I can't do much about those who think otherwise. The only thing I can do is to tell you to ignore them as much as you can. And if you have any problem, you can come and find me."

"Thank you, Professor."

"You may leave now, Allen-kun."

As Allen left the room, questions started running through his mind. What was all of this about? What was it that Tiedoll felt in his energy if it wasn't Kanda's? He then shook his head, deciding that he was fed up trying to find answers to questions that concerned him. There were more urgent matters to deal with.

* * *

"What kind of request is that?" Kanda asked sullenly.

"I don't know, it's the first time I'm sent into the forest to deal with a youkai." Allen replied while re-reading the scroll for the fourth time, slightly frowning. "When I asked Komui about it, he said that it was a hunter who found traces of an unknown youkai in the forest, and it worried him because that part of the forest is pretty near the city, so I have to go check this."

"Che, maybe they are sending you hoping that you'd be killed by whatever the youkai is." Kanda said with a strong hint of sarcasm.

"That wouldn't be very convenient for you, I reckon." Allen commented absently.

"Che. Let's go and finish this crap before nightfall."

After a quarter of an hour walking in the forest, Allen stopped and gave a look around him, frowning.

"I think it's somewhere around here, but I didn't see anything suspicious so far." he said.

"Che, you 'think' it's somewhere around here." Kanda repeated. "Then obviously you're lost."

"Well, sorry for not being good with directions." Allen snapped back. "And Komui said the hunter didn't want to come back here before the youkai is taken care of."

"Humans are as useless as always."

"Let's move a bit farther." Allen said, ignoring Kanda's comment. "If the youkai is strong, then I should be able to sense it."

And indeed, it didn't take the silver-haired Exorcist much more time to feel a hostile energy coming near. As he headed for the direction it was coming from, he felt a hand on his shoulder stopping him.

"Wait." Kanda said.

"What is it?" Allen looked at his shikigami who was frowning as he looked in front of him.

"I know this energy. It's a spirit of memories."

Allen opened his eyes wide.

"A... spirit of memories? You mean the same spirit that is supposed to live only in mountains, is very rare and difficult to find?" As Kanda nodded, he went on: "But we're in a forest!"

"No kidding."

"It can't be a spirit of memories."

"And I'm telling you it is." Kanda repeated, annoyed.

"How in heaven can such a youkai be here?" Allen retorted.

"Why are you asking me? Feel free not to believe me, but I think my sensing skills are slightly above yours." Now faint irritation could be heard in his tone.

"Wait, wait, wait. Let's presume you're right. I was taught that the only way to get rid of a spirit of memories is to feed it with someone's memories. Kanda, please tell me you can defeat it."

"Che, no." Kanda replied, shrugging.

For several seconds, Allen merely stared at his shikigami with obvious disbelief in his eyes.

"What do you mean, 'no'? My teachers told me that no spells can affect spirits of memories, which means that I'll be useless against it!" Allen's temper started rising.

"You're always useless." was Kanda's reply.

"This isn't the time for that kind of comments. What will happen if we simply let the spirit go freely?"

"See by yourself. It's coming."

Allen turned round and narrowed his eyes in an attempt at making out the blurry shape coming to them. As it came closer, Allen clearly saw the spirit floating in the air and slowly moving forward, exactly like the descriptions in his books. It looked like a huge jellyfish but with no tentacles, moving gracefully by swaying its transparent membrane. It suddenly stopped in front of a tree and landed on its trunk, pressing itself against it and started glowing. A few seconds later, the glow stopped and the spirit detached itself from the trunk.

To Allen's horror, the area of the tree where the spirit had stuck itself was no more. Instead, there was a plain hole. The tree, with part of its trunk removed, couldn't bear its own weight and started bending on one side until it completely collapsed on the ground with a loud thump, making the ground shake.

"When the target bears no memories, it simply vanishes." Kanda merely commented.

Allen was pallid. He gulped, then clenched his fists.

"We have to get rid of it somehow." he stated firmly. "Kanda, are you sure there isn't any way for you to kill it?"

"There is. Just go find someone and bring them here so the spirit can feed on their memories. End of the story." Kanda sneered.

"Kanda! I'm being serious here!"

"So am I."

Irritated by Kanda's behaviour, Allen traced a five-branch star in the air and uttered an incantation. Immediately, a cube-shaped barrier appeared around the spirit, enclosing it inside; but it took no effort for the latter to fly through it as if it was nonexistent.

"Damn it!" Allen cursed out loud.

Kanda glanced at him, seeing the boy bit his lip and frown, obviously desperately trying to find a solution to get rid of the youkai. He, however, had something else bothering him deeply: how the hell did a spirit of memories managed to get to that place? Those kinds of spirits weren't usually inclined to travel too far from their mountains, which meant that the probability of it getting lost was very low.

However, the idea that someone had brought it there was even less conceivable since it was impossible to touch the spirit without losing one's memories. Then how? And above all, who? And what for? All those questions without answers only raised Kanda's suspicions that nothing good would come of it; and the next events proved him right.

"Kanda, did you hear that?" Allen abruptly interrupted his thoughts.

"Hear what?"

"I think I heard voices! Gods, it's dangerous for them to be here!" the Exorcists frantically looked around him in search for potential strollers.

Indeed, childlike voices could be heard very close to them, and soon after, three boys appeared, playing and laughing, completely unaware of the unsafe situation until they saw the scene in front of their eyes. They stopped dead, staring with disbelief at the sight of a boy wearing the costume of an Exorcist, a frightening-looking man all dressed in black and... something flaccid they failed at identifying.

"Don't stay here!" Allen ordered them. "Get out of here immediately!"

But the three children were merely standing there, fascinated by the strange and white floating thing that was slowly flying to them. Exasperated, Allen ran to them, urging them to quickly leave the place and tell anyone in the area not to go back.

"Sir, are you an Exorcist?" one of the boy asked, absolutely ignoring Allen's warnings.

"Is that a youkai?"

"Are you trying to exorcise it?"

"Why does it look so weird?"

"Are you playing with it?"

"It looks funny! Can we play with you too?"

"Yeah! Yeah! We want to play too! Let us play with the youkai!"

Allen was at loss for words. Saying that he was irritated was beyond a euphemism; he purely and simply wanted to slap those three carefree children and knock some reason into their heads. Next to him, Kanda wasn't paying attention to the scene; his eyes were still following the slow movements of the youkai, trying to guess what its next target was.

Meanwhile, one of the boys had already started running to the spirit of memories and the two others were about to follow when Allen managed to grab the first one by the collar and violently pulled him back.

"Idiots! Get out of here!!" he shouted at them as he shoved the boy he had caught towards his two comrades. "This isn't the time to be playing! It's dangerous here!"

"But... but..." the first boy started whining while the two others glared at Allen.

"You're a bad Exorcist!"

"You don't like children! I'm gonna tell my dad!"

It was at that moment that Allen's last remains of control snapped.

"Shut up and leave immediately before I turn you into cockroaches!" he ordered, his temper completely lost.

The three kids froze on the spot, one hiccupping, another one on the verge of crying and the last one with tears already beading at the corner of his eyes. The harshness of the words surprised Allen himself, but at that moment, his only priority was to have the boys leave the spot before something irreversible happened.

"Didn't you hear me?" he asked icily. "Get out o..."

"Moyashi! _You_ get out of here!" Kanda suddenly interrupted him, and the next second, Allen felt something violently pushing him on the side, making him hit against a tree.

During the few seconds he was busy dealing with the kids, he hadn't noticed the spirit flying near him and if it hadn't been for Kanda, his memories would have been eaten away by it.

"Th-thanks, Kanda." Allen said while rubbing his head and wincing at the faint pain.

"Don't stay there, its next target is you!" Kanda warned him.

Indeed, the spirit was now heading for Allen who made a new attempt at sealing it in a barrier, with the same result as previously.

"Damn it!" Kanda cursed under his breath. Then he glanced at the boys who still hadn't moved from their spot and grabbed the wrist of one of them. "Come here!" he called the spirit. "I have a better prey for you!" he added as he pushed the terrified boy towards the youkai.

The latter immediately stopped before momentarily floating on its spot, then changed its direction to head for its target which was too stunned to move even a single finger. Behind him, his friends' faces were pallid and their whole bodies were trembling in fear, not understanding what was happening.

"Kanda, you can't!" Allen said, panicked.

Everything happened in a flash of time. A second before the spirit touched the boy, Allen jumped in between the two, pushing the boy aside. Next thing he knew, his whole body was enclosed by a gelatinous substance in which he was floating, and the substance started glowing under the kids' mesmerized eyes and Kanda's look of disbelief.

The spirit glowed, emitting a pulsing and gentle light that partly hid Allen from the others' eyes, it glowed during half a minute while Kanda could only watch, powerless, fists clenched and gritting his teeth. If he tried to slash it directly with Mugen, the sword would simply vanish since it didn't bear any memory.

"It's so pretty..." one of the boys said shyly.

Those mere words were enough to unleash Kanda's fury. He turned to the three boys and released a powerful wave of energy, making them scream and huddle up under the shock, then glared at them with blazing eyes which reflected nothing but contempt and anger.

"Out of my sight. Or I'll make sure you will never be able to go back home anymore." he declared without raising his tone, but the murderous aura enveloping him was speaking enough for him.

The boys were sprawled on the ground, as if they were pinned by Kanda's overwhelming energy, but fear lent them wings and after almost miraculously managing to stand up, they took to their heels and disappeared in a blink of an eye, crying and calling for their parents.

With a disdainful 'che', Kanda turned back to a more urgent priority: Allen. Despite the almost dazzling glow, his silhouette could be made out inside the spirit's body. Kanda summoned Mugen and activated its power; the blade was now wrapped in a bright blue aura, and as its wielder slashed the air, a discharge of power was released, aiming straight at the spirit.

Though Kanda had purposely avoided hitting Allen, the attack simply went through the liquid body, making the shikigami curse profusely even if he knew perfectly well by experience that no spell, no curse or no magic could have any effect on a spirit of memories. However, it seemed that the gelatinous youkai noticed that something had happened, for it suddenly stopped glowing and released Allen who fell on the ground, his body as limp as a boneless corpse. Long and white filaments were linking the boy's head to the spirit, floating like spider threads, and Kanda immediately guessed what they were: Allen's memories.

The filaments were slowly being absorbed by the youkai, filling its transparent body with the white material and melting inside. Without wasting another second, Kanda rushed to the spirit and severed the threads as close to its envelope as possible, then quickly stepped back to avoid any contact with it.

Next to him, Kanda could see the threads that were still linked to Allen gradually being absorbed back inside of him. His focus went back to the spirit.

The latter remained in the air during a few seconds, then started swirling graciously and to Kanda's relief, it rose through the thick foliage of the trees and disappeared, visibly sated.

After making sure the spirit wasn't coming back, the black-haired youkai walked to the lying body of the young Exorcist and knelt down. He slipped a hand under the boy's nape and made him sit up, then called him:

"Moyashi. Oi, wake up!" In a way, Kanda was apprehensive about Allen waking up, for he was very well aware of what kind of bad surprise was awaiting him. Still, maybe there was a chance that the worst hadn't occurred, maybe Allen would still be the same as ever, maybe nothing would have changed... Maybe.

"Che, damn brat, as useless as ever."

......

_Blackness._

_A flash of light here._

_Someone, running away, far, far away. Who was that?_

_Another flash over there._

_Laughter, words, voices. Who are they?_

_Why are they all running away from me?_

_Emptiness._

_I'm feeling drained._

_A void here. Had it always been void?_

_Another flash of light._

_Was that a forest I saw?_

_Countless colourful images streaming past, mixing and merging together._

_Then a sudden darkness._

_Had it always been dark?_

_Stop taking from me... I'm feeling tired._

_A voice? Who is it?_

_My eyes won't open._

_Let me sleep..._

_Please, stop speaking so loudly, I only wish to sleep._

_Won't the voice stop? It's annoying._

_What is it saying?_

_Moy... what?... Moyashi?_

_Weird._

_The voice won't stop._

_A glimpse of light.  
_

......

Allen blinked once, then twice, then fully opened his grey eyes to reality. Kanda, who had the boy leant against his arm, saw him rub his eyelids then glance around him.

"Moyashi." he called.

The boy jumped and quickly turned his head to the side, facing Kanda. And it was at that moment that the youkai knew that it was pointless to hope for a miracle.

Allen was staring at him the same way he had stared at him on their first encounter, and it wasn't hard to read the same puzzlement and the same surprise as the first time they had met. Kanda bit his lip, visibly irritated, and stood up abruptly. Not expecting it, Allen almost fell backwards but managed to avoid it by supporting himself with one arm, then raised questioning eyes to Kanda who wasn't even looking at him anymore.

Kanda couldn't believe it. That idiotic Exorcist who was supposed to be his master had chosen to get caught by the spirit instead of those annoying and whiny brats! The mere thought of it stirred a desire to kill within him, but what drove him to the epitome of exasperation was when Allen finally opened his mouth.

"Hm, excuse me Sir, but who are you and where are we?" he asked a bit hesitantly. The second after, he hunched up as Kanda turned to him and glared at him icily. "I-I'm sorry!" Allen apologized immediately.

And back to square one. At that moment, Kanda couldn't tell what the worst was between his curse and having to endure a spineless master again. As he looked at the frightened boy who didn't even dare moving, a sigh escaped his lips and he eventually said:

"Let's go. And don't lag behind." he ordered as he started walking back to the Temple.

Sitting behind the low table and almost buried under the impressive mountains of scrolls and papers, Komui looked like a house of cards about to collapse as a new card was added, the said card being Kanda's piece of news about Allen's state. The Chinese man pinched the bridge of his nose, obviously too tired by the countless problems that kept piling up a bit more every day, and let out a loud sigh.

* * *

"Nothing?" he asked the clueless boy who was standing in front of him, visibly scared and lost. "Absolutely nothing? You don't have a single memory of your past three years at the Temple?"

"N-no, Sir." Allen lowered his head, letting silver strands of hair hiding his face. Kanda was standing next to him, arms crossed and a very pissed off look on his face.

"What's the last thing you have recollection of?" Komui asked again.

"I-I... was playing in the street with my friends, and then..." Allen shook his head in distraught. "I don't remember what happened afterwards! Why do you say I spent three years at the temple? Which temple? I have to go back home otherwise Nara will be worried. Please let me go! I didn't do anything bad, I swear!" his tone started rising with a hint of panic in it.

Noticing it, Komui stood up and walked round the table to Allen, then gently put a hand on the boy's shoulder – making him stiffen at the touch – , and gave him a small smile:

"Allen, please calm down. I understand that you may be very confused, but you have no reason to be scared here." he said as reassuringly as he could. "Now, let me ask you another question: how old are you?"

"I'm twelve, Sir." Allen replied shyly.

Komui bit his lip, frowning.

"I see." he made a short pause before resuming: "Listen to me carefully, Allen. And you have to believe what I'm going to tell you. Your memories have been erased by a spirit of memories, though I have absolutely no idea how it managed to reach this place. According to what you told me, it seems you were lucky enough to have "only" three years of your memories removed."

"Only?" Kanda interrupted abruptly. "It was more than enough to turn the stupid kid back to a scaredy cat."

The harsh tone made Allen jump slightly, and it was obvious his only wish at that moment was to get as far from Kanda as possible. Komui sighed again:

"Kanda, I guess it must be hard on you but please try not to scare Allen more than what he is right now. And it could have been worse, he could have lost his complete memory. It's fortunate that you managed to stop the spirit."

"Che. Whatever." the black-haired youkai shrugged then started heading for the door.

"Where are you going?" Komui stopped him.

"Do something about the kid instead of asking pointless questions." Kanda snapped back as he exited the room.

As he left, Komui merely shook his head, then turned back to Allen who hadn't dared move a single finger meanwhile.

"Don't worry, he's always like that, but it seemed you two managed to get along, more or less." he said with a smile.

"Get along with him?" Allen asked, eyes widened in surprise. "But who is he?"

Komui raised an eyebrow before remembering that the boy still didn't know anything about being an Exorcist.

"He's your shikigami." he replied.

Three seconds passed before Allen finally reacted.

"My what?" he asked, dumbfounded.

* * *

Allen was, to say the least, completely lost. And confused. From the moment he found himself in the forest to the moment Komui told him he was an Exorcist, there was nothing but sheer blackness in his mind. How did it happen? He was playing in the streets with his friends in front of Nara's house, and suddenly, he was in the middle of an unknown forest, dressed with clothes that looked too much like an Exorcist costume, with a man he had never seen before and who seemed to hold a grudge against him, though he didn't know why.

Then the same man had dragged him almost forcefully to this place, the temple, which he had absolutely no idea what kind of temple it was. And then, he was told that absurdity which he refused to give any credit to. His memories had been stolen by a youkai as he was on a request. An Exorcist. He was now fifteen. Like he'd buy something like that. Obviously, the disbelief on his face had shown too much for the man named 'Komui' had offered to bring him to a certain 'Professor Tiedoll' who would allegedly be able to help him somehow.

And now, here he was, in an unknown room, standing in front of another unknown face and starting to get seriously worried about his current situation. He only wanted to go back home where Nara and the others were certainly waiting for him, wondering about his whereabouts.

"Komui, Allen! To what do I owe the honour of your visit?" the man asked, and Allen had to admit – though reluctantly – that he looked rather kind, like a caring grandfather.

"Actually" Komui started, "We have a slight problem."

* * *

Someone who'd have slid the panel open and taken a look inside would have thought it was a statue that was lying on the futon.

Allen was immobile, empty eyes gazing at the ceiling without really seeing it, his body as limp as a corpse. This was crazy. Completely crazy. Inwardly, he was wondering if he wasn't the insane one in the whole matter. Komui and Tiedoll had spent two whole hours with him trying to tell him about his three supposedly missing years of memories; from the moment he had joined the temple to now.

They had told him about his training with various teachers, about his 'friends' – what were their names? Lenalee and Lavi, weren't they? – about his _shikigami_ – a shikigami, for heaven's sake! – and about details that were too numerous for him to remember. But the most striking point for him was that shikigami. Kanda was his – no, _its_ name. It required a lot of effort from Allen not to mistake it for a human, given its appearance, and he was often finding himself lost in deep thoughts about that fascinating youkai. He hadn't got to see Kanda that much, but it had been enough to carve that severe face into his mind, and that pair of onyx eyes glaring at him with enough power to stun him on the spot...

Something else seemed strange since the moment he had woken up in the forest. He had suddenly started noticing a warm feeling spreading through his limbs and even now, he was still feeling it. He had no clue what it was though it felt like it was someone else's presence he was sensing, and it disturbed him all the more as he couldn't understand where the feeling came from.

However, the most troubling part was when he had requested them to let him go back to Nara. Both of them had remained silent for a second before Komui offered to show him his room so he could have some rest, then they'd talk again later. Why had he eluded the question?

A shiver ran down his spine. He wrapped himself up in the blanket but it didn't warm him up at all. This foreign room wasn't his and there was no way it could feel as warm as his actual room at Nara's house.

His eyes closed in spite of himself, and tiredness soon took over him, leading him to a dreamless world of blankness.

* * *

Three days passed, during which the Temple seemed to be carried away by a sudden overflow of requests – more than usual – and could barely cope with it. Allen rarely went out of his room and the visits he received were even scarcer. As a result, he was often left alone to brood all day long.

Well, there was still Kanda, but saying that he was scared of that demon was an understatement. The silent presence of his supposed shikigami disturbed him and intimidated him at the same time; it required a lot of efforts for him not to constantly stare at the handsome creature, though he couldn't help but glance every once in a while at the youkai.

On that day, he found himself brave enough to start a conversation with Kanda and it was with a slightly trembling voice that he spoke:

"Hm, excuse me Sir... I..."

"Che, I'm your shikigami, you stupid brat, and my name is Kanda." the youkai cut Allen sharply. The boy flinched.

"I-I'm not really used to it..." he apologized.

"Whatever. What do you want?"

"Well I-I thought we could... talk a bit and-and see if I can remember something." Allen stuttered. "But if you don't want to, then it's fine with me!" he added hurriedly, visibly afraid to upset Kanda. But the answer he was given wasn't exactly what he had expected.

"You don't even believe that you have a memory loss." Kanda replied.

"Well it's not that I... well... it's hard for me to believe everything I was told so..."

"So there's no point in us talking. It's no use telling you things you'll refuse to hear. Make up your mind, and then we'll see." Kanda finished for him before walking out of the room, leaving an utterly bemused Allen behind him.

Kanda was fulminating inwardly. Right when Allen had finally started becoming a master worthy of his interest, _that _had to happen. What irritated him the most was that he didn't have a single clue on how to give Allen's memories back. And to top it all, if the boy were to face the Earl or even one of his followers, he'd be as defenceless as a newly-born. The situation was getting dangerously critical. There was no telling what the idiotic kid could do now that he had no recollection of anything that was Earl-related; the best solution for now was to keep Allen at the Temple under close surveillance until a way was found to make him recover his memories – if such a way existed.

Naturally, Kanda could still feel Allen's presence for the bond between them hadn't been erased, but it was less powerful, as if Allen had unconsciously which was already a good start; still, it wasn't in his plans to babysit a kid who was unable to defend himself. What was in his plans, however, was to go look for the Earl and eliminate him as quickly as possible.

That's what he should have done a long time ago.

* * *

The red-haired man crossed the gate of the Temple, a faint smirk on his lips as he looked around him at the familiar surroundings. He walked confidently through the place, ignoring the questioning looks on the few people's faces he crossed, and soon stopped in front of a door. He knocked.

"Come in." a voice answered immediately.

The man slid the panel and stepped in, his gaze directed at the other man who was sitting behind an overloaded low table and scribbling on a scroll. The latter raised his eyes at the newcomer and opened them wide as he recognized the one standing in front of him. He put his brush down and stood up before walking round the table.

"Cross? You finally came back?" he asked with a hint of disbelief in his voice.

"Well, it seems so, my dear Komui. Glad to see me?" the said Cross replied, amused.

"Where were you during all those months? What brought you back here?" Komui inquired hastily.

"Hey, hey, calm down there. First, I want a cup of tea and some rest, then we'll talk."

Komui looked surprised at first, then sighed, a faint smile on his lips.

"Sure. You must have had a tough travel." he replied.

Half an hour later, both men were sitting in the reception room and drinking tea served with a plate of biscuits. Komui was just done summarizing all the recent events that had occurred during Cross's absence and was now observing the man's thoughtful expression.

"I see..." he muttered after a moment, more to himself than for Komui to hear him. He scratched his chin adorned with a small, russet beard then raised his eyes to Komui: "And you say the youkai attacks haven't decreased at all, right? Well, it's no wonder."

"What do you mean?" Komui inquired, frowning. Cross kept silent during several seconds before replying:

"I'll tell you, but for now, I also have a question: where's the Walker brat?"

The Chinese man cocked an eyebrow, clearly not expecting the question.

"Allen? Why do you ask?"

"I want to talk to him too. He needs to hear what I have to say." Cross replied on his most serious tone, which only served to increase Komui's curiosity. He sighed loudly.

"Well, you see... To tell the truth, there's a slight problem with Allen..." he started.

* * *

Kanda's eyes widened. He was aware of the fact that the energy bond he shared with Allen had weakened, yet he hadn't suspected the Exorcist's presence to abruptly disappear without any warning. There was only one explanation: usually the more distance there was between them, the less he could feel Allen's energy, which meant...

The youkai cursed profusely at his own lack of attention.

* * *

Cross slowly put his cup down, his face displaying a dangerously calm expression.

"Memory loss?" he asked, his voice still cool though a faint trembling could be detected, showing that he was displaying great self-control in order not to snap. "That's pretty inconvenient." he added.

"We don't know how a spirit of memories managed to get to this area. If we can determine that, maybe it'll give us a clue to retrieve Allen's memories." Komui said with not much conviction.

"Someone who got their memories stolen cannot retrieve them." Cross retorted darkly as he stood up. "I must say I didn't expect such a turn of event. And I thought I had made myself clear when I told you to take care of the brat three years ago."

"I know." Komui replied, sighing. He looked suddenly weary as he went on: "I'm the one at fault. I suppose I relied too much on Kanda to protect him." he added to himself.

"Kanda, huh? Where's he, anyway?" Cross asked abruptly, surprising Komui once more.

"You know about Kanda? How come?" the Chinese man asked, frowning.

"It doesn't matter how. There's a more urgent problem to deal with. Memory loss or no, I need to see both the brat and his shikigami.."

This time, Komui didn't even bother to ask how the other knew about Kanda being Allen's shikigami. The man had always been a mystery to him, and that fact wouldn't change.

"Well, Allen should be in his room. Let's go s..."

At that moment, the door of the reception room was violently opened, and the grim face of Cloud Nine made Komui fear that something had happened again. The blonde woman barely looked surprised at the sight of Cross – or maybe she simply ignored him – as she addressed Komui:

"We have a problem. It seems the young Allen Walker disappeared."

* * *

He was running, running, running. Where to? He had no idea, yet he kept running. Trees flashed by the edge of his field of sight as he was sinking deeper and deeper into the forest, not stopping even one second to catch his breath. For some reason, he couldn't stand staying among those people, no matter how nice they looked; he felt like a stranger there. What he only wanted was to go back to Nara and retrieve the reassuring feeling of a warm and welcoming house.

That's why he kept running. And as he did, he noticed the warm sensation in his body slowly vanishing. Allen shook his head. He didn't have time to bother about such petty details. If he was lucky, then he'd manage to get out of the forest and find a way back to Nara.

"Well, well. Aren't we in a hurry?" a voice suddenly echoed around him, making him stop on the spot.

Allen looked frantically around him, trying to locate the origin of the voice but saw nothing at first. Until a silhouette slowly appeared from behind a tree, walking to him with no haste and a smirk on their lips. Allen gasped as he saw who it was.

"K-Kanda?" he asked hesitantly.

The smirk widened as the one whom Allen had called brushed his ponytail with his fingers.

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Ok, here's another chapter for those who have been waiting. I hope the plot is fine to you so far, and I want to thank all those of you who're still supporting this story.  
Oh, and you can go check **TheSilentDream**'s fanart she kindly made for me in my profile!


	22. Missing

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man belongs to H. Katsura.

A/N: Just a word to tell all those who were disappointed by the previous chapter that I can understand you could dislike the memory loss thing, but I'd hoped that you'd give me at least the benefit of the doubt. Sadly most of you didn't. So now I have to spoil a bit: Allen wont' remain memory-less forever. To the few of you who still trusted in my plot, I deeply thank you.

Thanks to **Klappy** for checking the chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 22 - Missing**

With a cry of rage, Kanda punched the tree next to him. No matter how hard he tried to focus his attention in order to catch a glimpse of the brat's energy, he couldn't feel anything. The bond that linked him to Allen as a shikigami was still there, but the one they had been sharing since the day their energies had mixed together was almost non-existent. He had tried several times to call his master by sending him waves of energy, but there was no result. At best, he could only sense a fleeting disturbance that would disappear right after, like a sign that his master was still somewhere around though Kanda couldn't pinpoint the exact location.

He cursed silently under his breath, walking – almost wandering – in the forest while his head was filled with countless murderous thoughts. He had been looking for Allen for hours without really knowing where to go while people had been scattered throughout the area and into the capital city in search for any information about the boy. As he progressed deeper in the forest, one main question kept bugging him: how did that spirit of memories manage to get there? It was beyond pure luck. And why was the youkai brought there?

"Che, you damn brat." Kanda muttered for the hundredth time.

* * *

"I can't believe how careless you were, Komui." Cross said, visibly irritated as he paced back and forth in Komui's work room. "The kid lost his memory and _you left him on his own._ It's a wonder he managed to survive all those three years under your care."

As the Chinese man was about to answer, Tiedoll intervened:

"It's no use blaming anyone for this, Cross," he retorted gently. "We already informed the emperor about this matter and search parties are being held as we speak. All we can do now is to wait and hope."

"By the time he's found, it could already be too late," the red-haired man muttered. "Is the kid's shikigami still outside?" he then asked.

"Yes, he's probably also looking for Allen." Komui replied. "Some people said they saw him storm out of the Temple hours ago, heading for the forest it seems. Maybe he'll be able to find Allen quickly even though it's night-time already. Your own shikigami is also outside, right?"

"I sent Maria out so she could gather some information among the youkai." Cross nodded. "But I doubt the results will be satisfying. I know by experience that the kid is an expert at running away," he added grimly.

"What do you mean?" a blonde woman who was also there asked.

"I never told you how I found the kid, did I, Cloud?" As the latter shook her head, Cross went on: "First time I found him, his village was being attacked by youkai and he fled in the woods. I caught up to him on time to save him from a youkai which was about to kill him. And the kid fled again and I let him go because I knew there was a town nearby."

"You let him go?" Nine asked, surprised.

"I just made sure he was taken care of by someone and I kept an eye on him for three years." Cross replied, shrugging.

"What did you wait all that time for? Why didn't you bring him to the Temple at that time?"

"I guess I wanted to leave the kid a few years of peace," the man replied thoughtfully.

"I never knew you were such a soft man, Cross," a voice rose with a sneer.

"Hey, shut up old man." Cross snapped at Bookman who was standing at a corner of the room. "He'd have been a burden for the Temple during those years anyway. Then when I thought he was about the right age, I came to fetch him up and bring here. And hell, he was a serious pain in the neck all the way long. I can't count how many times he tried to escape to go back home. In the end I had to put him to sleep. Seriously, I'm telling you it's in his blood to run away," he added with a sigh.

"Anyway, you still haven't told us what brought you back to the Temple." Tiedoll asked implicitly. "You keep worrying about the young Allen but I think we ought to know what business he has with you."

"It's not our priority." Cross replied dryly. "Our priority right now is to find the idiotic kid as quickly as possible."

"You could also stop calling him 'idiot' or 'stupid'. He has a name, you know." Komui sighed.

"I call him an idiot because he's an idiot, nothing more."

"But you need him for some mysterious reasons." Nine intervened. "Tell me, Cross, there's something that sounds wrong in your little tale. You said you found Allen while his village was attacked. I can't believe you stumbled on him out of luck…" She left her sentence hanging while staring straight at the man whose face was always partly hidden by that strange mask.

Cross let out a short laugh and spoke:

"Most Exorcists-to-be are found out of luck, my dear Cloud. This one is no exception."

"I'd have believed it if it had come from anyone else but you, Cross," the woman retorted. "Luck doesn't seem to have its place around you."

"You flatter me, but I'm afraid you may have too high an opinion on me." Cross replied courteously with a charming smile.

Feeling that the conversation was getting tense, Komui quickly stepped in:

"Enough. We have plenty of work waiting for us here; therefore we have no time to waste on fruitless talks. Now that we are one Exorcist short, it's going to be even more difficult to handle the many requests we receive every day. I suggest you all go take a short rest then take assignments and we'll decide on what to do tomorrow. And Cross, I expect you to give a full report tomorrow, whether you want it or not. You can't afford to conceal information from us at this time," he said gravely.

The man made a noise of obvious disdain then walked away with a mere 'whatever'.

* * *

Night had fallen for a few hours, but it didn't seem to bother Kanda. He was in such a foul mood that his whole energy was quivering accordingly, emitting dangerous waves around him that dissuaded any living being from getting near him. At some point, he thought he had managed to locate the brat, but the only thing he had found was an empty spot.

At least, he was certain that Allen had been somewhere in the forest; now the question was whether he was still there or not. He kept hoping to receive the familiar wave of energy from the boy that'd allow him to find his location, but his energy sensing was desperately un-reacting.

Until he suddenly felt something approaching. He turned round abruptly and tried to make out the silhouette that was coming near. It wasn't Allen, he was certain of that, and he was proven right when he saw an oddly-dressed woman with a huge butterfly hiding her eyes walking to him, completely oblivious of the negative energy coming from him.

"Demon Kanda," the woman simply stated.

"And who might you be?" Kanda asked sharply.

"I am Maria and I am Exorcist Cross Marian's shikigami. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"Che, cut the crap. Where's your master? I can't sense him anywhere."

"He is at the temple, and wishes to talk to you about urgent matters."

"I don't have time to talk." Kanda replied dryly as he turned his back to the female shikigami, ready to walk away; but the next words made him stop on the spot:

"It is about Allen Walker."

"Does your master know where he is?" Kanda asked immediately.

"Please do come back to the temple and meet with him if you want some answers." Maria replied politely.

Kanda hesitated. He wanted to keep searching for the brat, yet he was also curious to listen to what that Cross Marian had to tell him. As if she could read his thoughts, Maria went on:

"I am also gathering information about the boy. Please leave it to me for now."

The black-haired youkai frowned, then gave up.

"Che, fine."

* * *

"Earl?" Sheryl asked carefully, standing at the doorframe of the room.

"What is it?" The said Earl was sitting next to a futon covered by a thin, white sheet. The faint movements of a breathing chest underneath revealed the presence of someone who seemed asleep.

"I just came back from the capital, and I have some intriguing pieces of news for you. It seems an Exorcist has disappeared and the emperor has given orders to find him. The description of the Exorcist is: a fifteen-year-old boy with white hair."

At those words, the Earl silently raised his eyes to the standing youkai. After a moment, he finally spoke, but completely changed the subject:

"How about Cross Marian?" he asked.

"He's currently at the temple."

"As long as Allen Walker is missing, he won't be able to do a thing," the Earl commented to himself.

"Do you think Marian found out about the Source?" Sheryl inquired.

"Who knows what that sneaky man managed to find? We'll soon have to go there and see how it's progressing."

"The remaining Exorcists are dead tired because of the attacks, and some parts of the capital city are already in ruins and sealed off. The situation throughout the country is even better: the youkai are slowly gaining control of the lands and it's only a matter of months before we're completely in control." Sheryl reported cheerfully.

"In any case, tell Lulubell to go and find the Walker boy. Alive," the Earl ordered. "If the Black Order finds him before us, everything we've done so far may be reduced to naught. And remind Road that I'm still waiting for answers about Kanrou's whereabouts."

"I will." Sheryl replied, bowing his head before leaving.

A moment after he left, the Earl gazed back at the lying figure and sighed:

"Tyki-pon, you'd better get well soon because I will need you very soon," he said.

* * *

Before Kanda even opened the panel of Allen's room, he knew that someone else was already inside. And indeed, as he stepped in, he saw a man standing in the middle of the room, his back turned to him. The man had long and thick scarlet hair and was wearing an Exorcist robe. As he turned round, Kanda noticed the white mask hiding half of his face and the trace of a smirk on the man's lips.

For some reason, the youkai immediately disliked him. Was it that glimpse of arrogance in his visible eye or his haughty bearing as he scanned Kanda from the top to the bottom? Or the almost non-existent energy he could sense from him though Kanda was almost certain that he was concealing it one way or another? He couldn't tell, but one thing was for sure, he wouldn't get along with that man.

They stared at each other silently, Kanda's icy dark blue eyes clearly reflecting all the contempt he felt for the intruder. Cross finally gave up with a sigh, though it was obvious he was amused by the whole situation:

"I finally get to see the demon Kanda, feared even among the most powerful youkai and – ironically enough – unable to harm a single human."

It took Kanda less than half a second to pin Cross against the wall, one hand tightly holding his neck. The urges he had to kill that man on the spot were at the limits of his self-control, and the only thing that prevented him from finishing that bastard off was his self-preservation instinct that kept screaming that he'd disappear if he were to harm a human being.

"As soon as I'm free…" he started with a dangerously threatening tone, "…it'll be my pleasure to get rid of worms like you. You'll be dead before you even understand what happened to you."

"I'm looking forward… to seeing that, then." Cross replied with some difficulty though that damn smirk was still stubbornly printed on his lips. "But in order… to get free, you'll need… Allen Walker."

Kanda glared intensely at Cross for a few seconds before slowly releasing him with a 'che'.

"I have no time to waste here with you," he then added, ready to walk out, but Cross stopped him:

"And here I thought you'd like to hear a bit about the Earl."

"What could you possibly know about him?" Kanda asked with a shrug.

"More than what you may suspect. And I also have a few questions for you about your master. But first, how about we go have a drink in the city?"

"Che, whatever."

Despite the pitch black sky, a crescent moon was providing enough light for the two individuals to see clearly. They reached the capital in no time and Cross started walking with assurance in the animated streets of the city. Despite the multiplying attacks, it seemed that it didn't stop people from leading more or less normal lives; the only noticeable change being the presence of armed soldiers at every corner of the streets.

After a dozen minutes, Cross finally stopped in front of a tall house with two huge, red lanterns hanging in front of the large and decorated doors, and was guarded by a single, muscled man.

"Here we are," he said with satisfaction.

"Oi." Kanda grunted.

"What?"

"We're in the red light district."

"Indeed, we are. I know the owner of this shop here, and I can assure you they serve the finest spirits of the whole capital, and their other products are of the highest quality too, if you see what I mean." Cross added as he started heading for the doors.

It was another reason why Kanda hated the human race. They didn't have any sense of priority and could only think of their own pleasure first, even if the situation didn't fit.

"I didn't come here for this. If you have nothing interesting to say, I'm afraid we'll have to part ways." Kanda replied dryly.

"Heh, come on. I assure you there will be some _extremely_ interesting stuff inside," the red-haired man insisted.

This time Kanda frowned. There had been something strange in Cross's tone that made him doubt. After a second of hesitation, he decided to follow the man inside.

"And I'm sure a demon like you which have lived for so long has undoubtedly enjoyed itself in such a place, am I wrong? The burning taste of alcohol in your throat or the addiction to beautiful women sighing in your arms…" Cross added with delight as he walked to the entrance.

"Che, alcohol doesn't affect me."

"How about women, then? With a look like yours, they'd fall at your feet."

"I'm not interested in women," was Kanda's sharp reply. _Not anymore, _he mentally added.

"What are you interested in then?"

After a second, as he heard no answer, Cross looked at Kanda behind him and barely managed to hide his surprise when he saw the predatory smile on the youkai's lips. For some unknown reason, a chill ran down his spine, telling him he'd better not inquire too much about the demon's tastes.

"Long time no see, Cross Marian," the guard at the door greeted, and it was at that moment only that Kanda realized that the man was actually a woman, despite the generous amount of muscles she had. "Anita will be glad to see you," she added as she opened the door, letting the two newcomers in.

The inside of the building was softly lit, enough to bring out the numerous young women who were half-lying on red silk sheets, either smoking opium or fanning themselves gracefully while giving men the eye. There was a stair, for obvious reasons, and a bar where women kept filling bottles of sake and various flavoured spirits.

It was a high-class brothel, for the decorations were refined and elegantly organized, the floor was clean of any drop of alcohol, and the women themselves acted with delicacy and behaved like nobles.

As soon as they saw Cross, several of them called him and waved their hands at him with bright smiles, inviting him to come; however, the man was merely smiling back at them and telling them 'some other time!' while walking straight to the bar.

Though Kanda didn't even deign to look at them, he wasn't blind enough not to notice he was also the centre of the attention. He completely ignored those women with too much flowers and pins in their sophisticated hairstyle of ebony locks, with their artificial red lips and strong fragrance, almost drowning under the several layers of bright-coloured fabric with multiple birds and flowers printed on them.

Beautifully decorated shells, indeed. But still shells.

Sudden images flashed through Kanda's mind. Images of simple strands of bare and snowy hair framing a flushed face, naturally pink and warm lips gasping and letting out the sweetest of noises, a plain and white robe sliding down a shivering body, arms wrapping around his neck and inviting him into a whirlpool of exquisite pleasures…

"Damn brat," he muttered.

He focused his attention back on Cross who was now standing by the bar and giving his best smile at the waitress there:

"I'd like to see Anita right now," he said.

"Certainly, though she may be a bit angry at you since she's been waiting for your return for months!" the woman replied cheerfully as she made a gesture towards a door next to her.

"Don't worry; I brought her a present to make myself forgiven."

"Of course you did! You always bring her something back from your travels, I'm so jealous!" the waitress purred, making Kanda snort in disdain. The woman immediately turned to Kanda, a seductive glint in her eyes:

"And who might you be, my handsome lord?" she asked.

However, before Kanda even had time to answer – not that he had intended to – Cross cut him:

"Someone who wouldn't be to your tastes, believe me," he said teasingly. "Now excuse us, but we have some business with Anita."

"Sure, go ahead," the woman pouted.

As he walked past the door, Kanda found himself in what seemed to be an office though the soft light created an atmosphere rather unfitting for work. There was a table in the middle, definitely tidier than Komui's, and a woman sitting behind it and writing.

"Good afternoon, Cross," she said without even looking up as she kept writing.

"Anita, my dear, I missed you, you know," the Exorcist replied warmly.

"It's not my fault if you decide to leave – the gods know where – for months."

"I brought something for you." Cross hurriedly added as he took an item from his pocket, then walked to the table, took one of Anita's hands in his own and put the item in her palm.

The black-haired woman glanced at the item – a hairpin – before putting it on the table. Then she put her paintbrush down and sighed. Finally a gentle smile adorned her lips.

"Welcome back, Cross," she said softly. "You know I don't need presents from you."

She then turned to Kanda and greeted him with a warm smile:

"I believe we weren't introduced. My name's Anita and I am the owner of this establishment."

"Whatever." Kanda merely replied, visibly irritated. He was wasting his time here while that stupid man was busy courting a woman. The latter was obviously surprised by Kanda's reaction yet she didn't insist.

"Mr. Grumpy here isn't patient, Anita." Cross went on. "How about we get down to business now?"

"Fine. Please take a seat," she said. While Cross gladly sat down, Kanda chose to remain standing.

Anita then stood up and walked to the shelves next to her, and took a scroll out before handing it to Cross.

"This is the latest report we have about the activities around Mount Shiomi."

Kanda twitched at that name, but decided to keep silent and to listen to what the two others had to say.

"No matter all the effort we put into it, we can't manage to tell exactly what's happening over there." Anita went on. "We only know that something is being prepared inside the mountain, but my men keep asserting that they can't see anything unusual there. We believe that there must be some kind of magic that conceals it from our eyes, and since we do not possess the gift that you Exorcists have, it's as if we were completely blind."

"There's indeed powerful magic." Cross nodded. "I went there and I can tell you that whatever it is the damn Earl wants to protect, it's there, hidden by that magic. My guess is that he's using the same kind of magic demons use to hide their whole clans. What do you think, Kanda?" he asked the youkai abruptly.

The latter remained silent for a few seconds, before Anita's voice rose:

"Kanda? Cross, you don't mean _that_ Kanda, do you?" she asked, visibly puzzled.

"Of course I do. Come on, tell her by yourself." Cross added to Kanda.

"Shut up," the demon snapped. "Cut the useless talk and finish your story. Why are you watching Mount Shiomi?"

"A-actually, when the attacks started, Cross asked us to investigate." Anita replied, her voice slightly trembling. "After months of investigation, w-we finally managed to find something in that area so we deepened our research there. Excuse me, I still can't believe that you're Kanda, i-it was so sudden…"

"Che." Kanda didn't give a damn about that woman who was now looking at him with respect – and fear. "At least you were a bit more efficient than the whole bunch at the temple," he added as he walked to the door.

"Hey, we aren't finished here." Cross intervened. "I asked you a question and I'd like an answer."

"Whatever." Kanda merely replied as he left the room.

Cross let out a sigh.

"Demons sure are a pain," he said.

"Is it alright with you? That he left, I mean." Anita inquired.

"Yeah, don't worry. Sooner or later, he'll go to Mount Shiomi by himself and then, we may have some answers."

"How can you be sure he'll go?"

With a faint smirk, Cross replied: "He won't miss an opportunity to confront the Earl. Anyway, I'd like you to withdraw from all of this. No more investigations, no more spying, nothing. In short, don't get involved in this any further."

"What? We can't…" Anita started protesting, but Cross cut her short:

"You and all your men put yourselves in enough danger. Now I want you to go back to your old, normal life."

The fine woman looked at him with incredulous and pleading eyes.

"But Cross…" she murmured as she looked away, "… you know perfectly well what my 'old, normal life' is, and I don't want such a life anymore. Before you found me, I…"

"I didn't mean that!" Cross quickly corrected. "You know I didn't mean that. I simply want you to be the normal owner of a normal establishment where I'll be able to come and see your pretty face as a reward for all my hard work," he gently added as he held out his hand to her cheek.

"But you only come here to read my reports… if you ask us to stop working for you; I won't have any excuse to call you here anymore…" Anita answered as she leaned against the palm of his hand.

"I'll come back if you promise me not to get involved in this matter anymore."

"… Fine," the woman yielded with a sigh.

* * *

Too easy. It had been too easy. Kanrou smirked inwardly; all he needed to do was to find a spirit of memories, a bunch of obedient youkai to lead it to the forest – at the cost of their own memories – and to order another few dozen youkai to raid the city in order to keep the Temple as busy as possible. It hadn't required much talent to persuade the three stupid kids to go play in the forest – sweets and the promise of finding a hidden treasure.

Luck was by his side for the first Exorcist to come out was the target he wanted: Allen Walker. From that moment, it all had been a matter of minutes since he knew that Kanda would never sacrifice himself to get rid of the spirit; and as planned, the human boy had got his memories eaten by the spirit.

After that, Kanrou had sent another wave of youkai and the boy found himself neglected by those who should have taken care of him. Humans' reactions were so easily predictable; running away was the first thing they could do naturally, and it didn't take long before the boy escaped as planned.

And now, a completely clueless Allen Walker was standing in front of him, in the middle of the night, with fear clearly reflecting in his eyes.

"K-Kanda?" The hesitant voice made the youkai laugh. The brat was fully at his mercy.

"Come with me, Allen Walker," he said invitingly instead of answering.

"I don't want to go back to the temple! I want to go back to Nara!" the young Exorcist suddenly lost his temper.

"I never said we're going to the temple." Kanrou replied calmly. "You want to see Nara? Fine, I'll bring you to her but first, you have to do something for me."

Allen was obviously not expecting the answer for clear surprise was displayed in his grey eyes. He looked at Kanrou, frowning, as if trying to detect any lies in the latter's words, before speaking again:

"You'll take me to her?" he asked timidly.

"Of course. But as I said, I need you to do something for me first."

"What do you want me to do?"

"Let's not stay here for a start, unless you want the people of the temple to find you."

"No, I don't! But why are you helping me now, Kanda?"

A smirk was Kanrou's answer as he started walking away, motioning for the boy to follow him. Allen was intrigued; he couldn't understand why his – supposedly – shikigami's behaviour had turned from cold and scary to something close to kindness. However, it didn't really matter much to him, as long as he could go back to Nara.

Allen had no idea how long they had walked until they finally got out of the forest and arrived at a village. Or rather, the remains of a village. It was too familiar a vision for him: traces of a burnt ground riddled with craters, charred frames of empty houses in ruins, and the persistent smell of wet ashes indicating that the drama had occurred not so long ago. Despite the darkness of the night, he could imagine every detail like a vivid memory.

He didn't need to ask what had happened for he knew the answer all too well. His body refused to move at the sight of the desolation in front of his eyes, he was paralysed as repressed reminiscences came haunting him again, making all his limbs tremble uncontrollably. Panic swept over him and the only thought in his head was to run away from that place, as far as possible, to erase the scenery that had taken him years to forget.

A hand on his shoulder made him jump. He turned his head to see Kanrou looking at him inquiringly.

"Oi, what's your problem?" he asked sharply.

"N-nothing. I was just… surprised to see this. It's the work of y-youkai, isn't it?" Allen managed to articulate.

"Yeah. Let's go there."

"Why?" Allen asked abruptly.

"Those idiots from the temple won't look for you in such a place."

"F-fine."

It was on shaky legs that he entered what was left of the village. As soon as he stepped in, he saw the one he believed was his shikigami hold out his hand and utter something. Immediately after, Allen felt as if the air distorted around him, twisting and twirling, making his head feel dizzy for a few seconds, then everything went back to normal.

As he steadied himself and gazed around him, he noticed that nothing had changed, which made him frown. What had Kanda done? And as if to answer his silent question, he heard the youkai speak next to him:

"It's a barrier to prevent needless humans and youkai from finding us," he explained casually.

"You can do such a thing?" Allen asked, amazed. "What else can you do?" he went on with a childlike curiosity.

"That is none of your concern." Kanrou replied as he started walking towards a small house that looked more or less spared by the attack and entered.

Allen followed him inside and the feeling of uneasiness increased in him as he saw that the place was almost intact. Strangely enough, the presence of that spared house seemed out of place; to him, a village that was attacked by youkai was doomed to be turned to nothing but dust and the fact that Kanda had brought him here suddenly made him doubt the good intentions of his shikigami.

There was something strange in his whole behaviour; why was he helping him now after completely ignoring his existence not a day ago? What was it that he had to do before being finally able to see Nara?

"Do you plan to stay standing all day long?" an annoyed voice interrupted his thoughts. "You humans need sleep, don't you? So sleep, and we'll talk tomorrow."

It's true that he was feeling exhausted, probably because of his escape through the forest, and his tired limbs were begging him for rest. Allen looked around him. The floor was covered by a tatami on which Kanrou was sitting cross-legged, and a few pieces of furniture were left there by the former owner – who was probably dead, Allen thought darkly. He walked to Kanrou and sat down right next to him, leaning his back against the wall.

Usually, at Nara's house, it wasn't rare for all the children to sleep together on the floor, cuddled up to keep themselves warm. However, this time, Allen highly doubted he could do the same with the youkai sitting next to him. He tentatively leant his head on Kanrou's shoulder, hoping that it'd be ok, but the latter immediately snapped at him:

"What do you think you're doing? I'm not a pillow," he said dryly.

"S-sorry." Allen quickly withdrew.

After a few seconds of thoughts, he glanced at Kanrou who now had his eyes closed, and decided to lie on the tatami, curled up. He didn't know how long it took for sleep to take over him, but the last thing he remembered was how cold it was compared with his room at the temple.

Morning came, and Allen opened his eyes wishing that everything had been a bad dream. However, the first words he heard next to him quickly proved him wrong.

"It's a miracle Kanda managed to bear with a wimp like you," he muttered.

"I… beg you pardon?"

"I'm just saying that my brother must have had a hard time dealing with you." Kanrou shrugged.

"Your… brother?" Now confusion could clearly be read on Allen's face. "But aren't you Kanda?"

"Did I ever say so?" the youkai asked back with a smirk that soon vanished to leave room to a cold expression that made Allen gulped. "You silly brat, know for your own good that I hate it when I'm mistaken for my brother."

"I-I'm sorry! Then… are you also… a shikigami?" Allen asked, his last words almost inaudible as he flinched under Kanrou's stare. The second he pronounced them, he knew he had made a mistake.

"Don't you dare imagine I'm part of those low-ranked youkai, you ignorant fool," the demon replied icily. "As if someone could be able to defeat me," he added with sheer contempt.

"I'm sorry!" Allen repeated hurriedly as he bowed down, his face now pallid.

"Let's stop with the useless talk." Kanrou decreed on a kinder tone. The abrupt change of tone made Allen raise his head. "Do you like stories? I'm going to tell you one."

Not knowing what else to do, Allen nodded hesitantly.

"Very well. Then let me tell you the story of a demon from thousands of years ago. That demon lived in a clan with his kind but unfortunately, its demonic powers were ridiculously weak, and the clan it belonged to was a proud clan feared by both youkai and humans. There wasn't a place where the sole mention of the name of whichever member didn't make one tremble in respect. One of the most powerful lineages of demons. Yet, there was that single demon, a stain for the clan, an aberration, an anomaly, whatever you want to call it. It was barely at the level of the lowest youkai and was a shame for the clan. Therefore, the latter tried to get rid of it. However, the demon managed to run away and disappear. For a century, no one heard about it and believed it to be dead; until that day when it came back to his clan."

Kanrou paused, amused by Allen who was hanging on his every word, then resumed after a short while:

"The demon wasn't the same anymore. From a harmless insect, it had turned into a terrifying youkai worthy of its clan. No one could believe the changes that had occurred in it, it's not exaggerated to say that it far outdid most of its fellows and that only a few of them could stand a chance against it. Now do you know what that demon did after it came back?"

As Allen shook his head, he went on:

"It killed them all. As a proof of his power. It exterminated every single member, claiming its revenge on a clan that had tried to get rid of a worthless trash. Then it left and started bringing death in every place it set foot in, therefore becoming an unstoppable bloodthirsty demon whose main entertainment was to see entire villages being devoured by flames."

Kanrou stopped again to observe Allen's reaction. He wasn't surprised to detect shock, anger and maybe even rage in the boy's eyes.

"But…" Allen started, "This is only a story, isn't it?" he asked, worried.

"Do you think so? Then let me tell you the end of the story: there was a single survivor after the massacre of the clan. It was the demon's own brother. Its twin, more accurately. In other words, me."

Allen's eyes opened wide, then he stood up hastily and stepped back clumsily, not believing his ears.

"Y-You're making fun of me, aren't you?" he stuttered.

"Feel free not to believe me, but your shikigami is actually a demon which would have killed you a long time ago if it weren't for the curse it bears."

"You're lying…" Allen said with a trembling voice. "You've made up this entire story, right? You're only trying to scare me. You're trying to scare me into going back to the temple, am I wrong? I'm not even an Exorcist, I don't have any shikigami and I don't have anything to do with any kind of temple so leave me alone!" he burst out.

Enough. He had had enough of those fantasies. He only wanted one thing: go back to Nara. Was it so hard for those people to understand? He didn't want to have anything to do with youkai, exorcism and whatnot.

"Stop your whining immediately." Kanrou's cold voice made him jump. "Your memories were stolen, deal with it. I already said I have nothing to do with the temple, I only want to help you."

It was enough to silence Allen. Satisfied with the result, Kanrou went on with a softer tone:

"Now, about what I want you to do… It's pretty easy actually. I want you to release Kanda."

Allen was still looking at him, visibly not really understanding, which only increased Kanrou's annoyance.

"Right now, he's your shikigami, which means you can release him from his service towards you," he explained with a hint of impatience.

"But I don't know how to do that! I-I'm not even sure I have a shikigami…" Allen replied, fidgeting with his fingers.

"You're not sure? Then I can help you with that. Since he's my brother, I can feel the bond linking both of you together. I can help you feel it. That way, you'll believe me, won't you? All that will be left for you to do is to sever the bond."

"How do I do that?"

"I'll help you." Taking an unexpected kind tone, he went on: "All you'll have to do is let me cut it for you. Easy, right?"

"If I do that… you'll let me see Nara again?" Allen asked hesitantly.

"Of course. I'll lead you to the person you're looking for after we're done."

"But what will happen to Kanda?"

"Why do you care about him?" Kanrou sighed. "He doesn't deserve any kindness, and certainly not from an innocent child like you. Now let's not waste more time on this. You want to be freed from all of this, don't you?" he asked with a sympathy that could have fooled even the most suspicious one.

Allen's brain was overloaded with the income of information that was threatening to make him lose his mind at any second. A part of him wanted to comply without any question while the other part kept finding the whole situation particularly suspicious. There was something wrong about that youkai – which he didn't even know its name – sitting in front of him nonchalantly with that never-fading smile on its lips.

Still, what did he have to lose if he obeyed? Nothing. If everyone believed he was an Exorcist, then fine. If the youkai wanted him to sever the bond with his supposed shikigami, then he saw no reason not to do so. And after that, he'd finally able to go back to his own town where his friends were certainly waiting for him.

"Still hesitating?" Kanrou asked. With a sigh, he stood up and his tone suddenly turned as gentle as Nara's: "Then let me remind you this: Kanda is a demon which only longs to kill and spill as much blood as possible. Can you really stand being linked to such a creature? I'm offering you to cut ties with it. If you refuse the bond by severing it, I'll be able to kill Kanda for you and you'll never have to worry about him again. How does it sound?"

"Why can't you… kill him now? Why do you need me to… release him first?"

Kanrou felt irritation rise in him, though he didn't show any sign of it outside. With a faint smile, he replied:

"For a reason you don't need to know, it'll be better for me if you two aren't linked anymore," he said, standing up and walking to Allen who instinctively stepped back. "Come on, there's nothing for you to fear. I'm simply going to find the bond in you and make you feel it for a start. Is it fine with you?"

The young Exorcist was slightly quivering and he gulped, still unsure about what to do. The next second, he felt Kanrou's hands on both his cheeks, and they were surprisingly warm and pleasant to feel. Their faces were close enough for Allen to blush and avert his gaze.

"Look at me," the demon said softly, and Allen obeyed.

He stared into those two dark blue irises and found himself being hypnotized by them.

"I'm not like my brother," Kanrou almost whispered. "I simply want to help you, to free you from something you don't want. Do you understand?"

"I-I'm scared..." Allen replied, intimidated.

"You don't have to," the demon said reassuringly. "I promise you, if you do as I say, then you won't have to worry about anything else anymore. So, what's your answer?"

The boy gulped, then slowly, very slowly, nodded. Kanrou smirked mentally. Foolish brat. A few soft words and gentle gestures were enough to deceive him. It was simply too easy.

"Very well." Kanrou put his hand on Allen's shoulder and closed his eyes.

At the same moment, Allen felt something stir inside of him, like a stream flowing through his whole body, and it took him by surprise. The sensation was strange but not unpleasant.

And then, the warm feeling which he had started to get used to increased in intensity, sending him an unexpected chill of pleasure that took him off guard. He was engulfed into that overwhelming wave of whatever-it-was and was almost swept along with it. He felt goose bumps rise on his skin but didn't have time to recover as he received a new wave, then a third before it finally stopped.

Obviously, it also disconcerted Kanrou for he abruptly withdrew as if Allen's body had burnt him, and he frowned deeply.

"What the…" he started, though more to himself than for Allen to hear. The boy was still standing immobile, not understanding what was wrong until Kanrou spoke again: "What the hell did my brother do to you? It wasn't enough for him to mate with you, but he also managed to mix some of his energy with yours?"

Allen opened his eyes wide.

"M-mate with me? What do you mean? And mixing?" he asked, horrified.

Kanrou held back his annoyance and kept the act:

"Exactly what I said, unfortunately," he replied with a sigh. "But I don't understand why there are traces of his energy in yours. Mating doesn't…"

"You're lying!" Allen exclaimed. "How could a youkai possibly… well…" His voice lowered and a faint blush appeared on his cheeks as he spoke, "… do those kinds of things?"

"Oh, there's no doubt he coupled with you. I can smell his scent all over you." Kanrou replied. He started pacing back and forth in the room, looking deep in thoughts. "But what was that surge of energy I felt in you…" he started muttering to himself before Allen interrupted him again:

"That's absolutely disgusting! Do you think I could believe something like that? You're just messing with me!"

Kanrou finally remembered that human beings didn't share the same values as demons. To him, what he considered secondary was absolutely inconceivable for the brat. Humans were so complicated. Gathering all his self-control, he walked to Allen, faking sympathy as he rested a hand on his shoulder and said:

"I know it must be terrible for you. But this is the truth and I'm sorry I was so tactless. I shouldn't have told you, but now you know what kind of creature my brother is. And you also understand why you have to cut ties with him as soon as possible, don't you?"

Feeling that Allen was still tense and doubtful, he completed his act with the most efficient gesture to have someone drop their defences: he embraced the boy, not too tightly yet enough to make him relax in his arms.

The trick worked; Allen instinctively pressed himself closer, lost and confused.

"Will you let me help you?" Kanrou asked softly.

A few seconds elapsed before Allen nodded again, sealing Kanrou's victory.

"Let's start then."

-  
That's all for now. Next chapter should be up soon. And those who read 'Sensitivity' may have seen that I prepared a present for Kanda's birthday and may have already tried it out. Those who didn't can go check my profile. I made a **Yullen doujin mini-game** to celebrate. Feel free to download it and tell me what you think of it.


	23. Trust

Disclaimer: D. Gray Man belongs to H. Katsura

* * *

**Chapter 23 - Trust  
**

Never had Kanda run as fast as he was right now. He had been calling Allen every once in a while, hoping to receive an answer though everything he had got so far was plain silence. He couldn't even reach the boy's energy. Except on that time.

He had made a new attempt at calling his master, and finally, the brat's energy had responded, telling him exactly where he was. Kanda didn't know why it suddenly worked, and he tried calling him again. It responded twice before Kanda lost track of Allen's energy again, which upset Kanda. What had allowed the brat to be receptive to his call, even for a few seconds only? Pure luck? He doubted it. But he had no idea what else it could be. Not that it mattered to him.

Right now, he was heading for the place where he had last felt Allen's presence, only wishing that the brat would be clever enough not to move. However, as he got closer to the location, he still couldn't feel anything despite the shortening distance. The area was desert, except for a partly destroyed village.

Kanda frowned. Was the brat hiding inside? If so, why was he still unable to sense anything? Did it mean that Allen had moved somewhere else?

"Che, stupid brat." he cursed as he moved forward.

* * *

For the third time, Kanrou stepped back from Allen, not understanding why he kept failing at severing the bond.

"What happened? Are you done yet?" Allen inquired, slightly worried.

"No." Kanrou replied, annoyed. "My brother did something to you that prevents me from cutting the tie."

"Wh-what did he do?"

"I'm not sure myself, but it seems that the energy he put in you is closely intermingled with yours and makes it impossible for me to separate you from him."

"I-I'm afraid I don't understand."

Kanrou had to call forth all his self-control in order not to break the boy's neck and keep a more or less normal face despite the obvious irritation growing in him.

"Then I'll explain it in a way you can understand." he said patiently. "It seems that you share two different kinds of bonds in you with my brother; the first one is the usual bond that an Exorcist and a shikigami share, but the second one is something I never heard about. It's like a bond of energy linking both of you in a way I never saw before. And those two bonds are completely interlaced together."

"Did Kanda do that to me on purpose?" Now panic could clearly be heard in Allen's voice. "But isn't it possible for you to cut both bonds?"

"That's where the problem lies. I tried, but I can't manage to. And it's pretty irritating." the youkai replied before putting his hand on Allen's shoulder again. "Let's try again."

Allen nodded. Inwardly, Kanrou was fulminating. If he couldn't achieve this, then his effort would become vain. The risks he had taken were multiple; hiding from the Earl for example, and from the pain in the neck that was Road. But the fact was that he was currently incapable of erasing the bond between the brat and Kanda. _Damn you, Kanda. Just how far do you intend to go to rouse my hatred towards you?_

And as if to answer his silent question, a sudden shockwave shook the area, making Kanrou froze and his eyes widen. It barely took him half a second to recognize the offensive energy approaching him at dangerous speed. He clenched his fists, and at that moment, he couldn't tell whether his body was trembling out of loathing or thrill.

Allen didn't miss the sudden change and he asked timidly:

"Wh-what is it?"

"Kanda..." the youkai pronounced the name as if it was a curse.

"He's here? He found us already? How come?" Allen asked again, panicked.

But Kanrou wasn't listening to him. His focus was now fully directed at the source of spiritual energy coming to him; it didn't require great sensing skills to detect the hatred that was emanating from him, and saying that Allen was now terrified was an understatement.

His mind was blank from fear, and he barely noticed Kanrou summoning his sword until he felt the cold blade against his neck. The youkai was now behind him and holding him firmly against him.

"Wha..."

"Don't move." the youkai ordered icily. "He's there."

And indeed, a second later, the front door and a part of the wall was demolished and turned to dust in less time than required to describe it. The whole house was now trembling dangerously and threatened to collapse at any time; but Allen's attention was more drawn to the person – or rather, the youkai – standing in front him, his dark hair floating freely under the clouds of dust, a blade in his hand and the promise of death in his blazing eyes.

During a few seconds, none of them either spoke or move, simply staring at each other while the house was falling apart, until Kanrou finally broke the silence:

"My dear brother. Glad to see you."

"Don't fuck with me. You thought a barrier would hide you from me? Get real. This time I'll kill you for sure." Kanda replied, his voice full of abhorrence.

"I wonder about that. Aren't you worried about the human boy here?" Kanrou went on, slightly pressing the sharp blade against Allen's neck.

Needless to say, Allen was immobile, his heart pounding so hard against his chest that he feared it was going to rupture. He daren't even gulp for fear of upsetting Kanrou.

"You trash." Kanda spat, and for a second, the young Exorcist thought he was addressing him. "What business do you have with him?"

"Something that doesn't concern you, but I'm afraid we'll have to postpone this conversation, unless you want your _master_ to be buried here." Kanrou replied with a strong hint of sarcasm on the word 'master'.

"I won't let you go anywhere."

"Oh but I fear you won't have much choice. It'd be problematic for you if this kid were to die, wouldn't it?"

From where he was, Allen could see clearly Kanda's gripping the handle of his sword so tightly that his hand was turning white. A loud thump next to him almost made him jump, and a quick glance on the side showed him that the building was crumbling apart. Kanrou was right; if they didn't get out of there quickly, they'd be buried alive, but how was he supposed to intervene between those two demons which could see nothing but each other, and which could only think about killing each other?

Kanda stepped forward, but his brother immediately stopped him:

"Don't move or the kid's as good as dead." he threatened icily.

And in a sudden surge of courage coming from nowhere, Allen finally managed to speak, even if it was a mere stutter:

"B-but you said you'd take me to Nara..."

"Obviously, I lied." Kanrou snapped back with obvious disdain in his voice. "Hell, how stupid can you human beings be?"

It wasn't hard to read Allen's disbelief and distraught in his widened eyes and suddenly, he pleaded silently for Kanda to save him. Without even knowing why, he wanted Kanda to save him and protect him, but it seemed that his shikigami was ignoring him completely for he was entirely focused on Kanrou. The latter loosened his grip on Allen and spoke again:

"Kanda, I'll withdraw again for this time but if you want to settle things with me, I'll be waiting for you at Mount Shiomi. In the meantime, try to take care of your _master_ with more attention. It'd be a pity if he were to die." he sneered before shoving Allen towards Kanda and slashing the wall behind him. A second later, there was no trace of him anymore.

"Kanrou! You damn coward!" Kanda's cry of fury paralyzed Allen and filled him with terror. The aura enveloping his shikigami reflected nothing but sheer anger and during a few seconds, the boy thought he was going to be consumed by the flames of that anger; until the pair of dark blue eyes finally set on his quivering form.

"Che, let's get out of here." he barely said as he roughly grabbed Allen's wrist and pulled him out with such a strength that the boy thought his shoulder was going to dislocate.

The next second, the whole building collapse in a loud rumble that made the ground shake under their feet. Allen was at loss for words; too many events had happened in such a short span of time, his mind was a complete mess and not a single coherent thought managed to cross his head.

"Oi." The tone was everything but kind, and it wasn't hard to guess the barely repressed anger behind it.

Allen slowly turned to Kanda, not daring to meet his gaze, and waited for whatever was to come next. His surprise was big as the demon merely said:

"We're going back. If you try anything funny, I swear I'll make you regret it."

The trip back to the temple was as silent as death, for Allen didn't dare pronounce a word and Kanda was completely absorbed by his thoughts. Afternoon was soon to leave room to the coming evening and the air was already getting chilly despite it was past mid-spring. The road they were walking on was desert, and so was the landscape around them. Oblivious of the weather and the temperature, Kanda was having a hard time thinking about the recent events.

The reason why Kanrou had fled was beyond him, it was clear that the hatred they bore for each other was equally intense; and why he wanted to sever the bond between Allen and him was another mystery. Even more, it was completely absurd. Cutting the bond meant that the contract made between a shikigami and its master would be nullified and the said shikigami would be free.

In Kanda's case, it'd mean free to kill again, free to use his powers without restrictions. What would Kanrou gain by achieving this? It wasn't logical at all.

And then, there were those words. _I'll be waiting for you at Mount Shiomi._ Mount Shiomi. The fact that the Earl also had some business there couldn't be a mere coincidence. Kanda clenched his fists at the mention of that name; it was bringing him back too many memories from thousands of years ago, memories of humiliation, sworn vengeance and annihilation. Even after so many centuries, the screams of those who were once his kin as he was tearing their flesh apart, the looks of fear, disgust and loathing as they breathed their lasts, the final words of curses directed at him before they turned to dust, all of those were as clear in Kanda's mind as if the events had occurred on the previous day.

A sudden thrill ran down Kanda's spine, and his lips unconsciously stretched into an evil grin. How he missed those times when he could go on the rampage whenever he felt like it, simply because he had the power to. The memory of the warm trails of blood on his skin and the metallic taste in his mouth raised a surge of excitement that he could barely control.

However, a faint gasp next to him brought him back to reality and he glanced annoyingly at the boy next to him who had just frozen on the spot.

"What is it?" Kanda asked dryly.

"I-I don't know." Allen replied hesitantly. "Something weird just happened to me. It was... I don't know, I suddenly had the urge to... to kill someone... But I'm fine now!" he added hastily as he saw Kanda's eyes widening.

There was a second of silence before Kanda finally spoke:

"You suddenly had the urge to kill someone." he repeated. As Allen nodded shyly, he went on: "That was my urge to kill that you felt."

"I beg your pardon?"

"Che. You and I are damn linked by our energies, you should have felt it back then when I called you." Kanda replied with a hint of annoyance.

"Called me?"

"Like this."

As soon as his shikigami pronounced those words, Allen jumped literally as Kanda sent him a wave of energy. Again, the warmth seizing him took him off guard and he shivered from the pleasant sensation enveloping him. However, something else happened: from nowhere, images flashed in his mind, too blurry for him to identify them, though he was certain he caught a glimpse of Kanda in them. But as for the meaning of the images, he was completely clueless.

"Wh-what was that again?" he asked, puzzled.

"I just called you. What you felt was the energy I poured into you." Kanda replied.

"I see... but what were those images I saw?"

"What images?"

"Well, when you... called me, several images appeared in my head, but I couldn't tell what was on them. But I think I saw you on one." Allen tried to explain with some uncertainty.

Kanda frowned. What was the kid talking about? Even when he still had his memories, he never mentioned seeing 'images' whenever Kanda called him, so what kind of nonsense was this?

"Let me try again." he declared, and without waiting for Allen's approval, he sent a wave of energy again, more powerful this time, powerful enough to make the boy step back at the received shock.

And again, new images emerged in his head, and this time, he was almost certain that Kanda was present in each of them. It lasted only a mere second before everything turned back to normal, but it was enough to destabilize him.

"So?" Kanda asked sharply.

"I-I saw them again. And I'm pretty sure I saw you on every image." Allen replied.

"Did you recognize something else?"

"Well, I think I saw the forest, then my room at the temple, and some other places that seemed familiar to me but I can't tell where they are." the boy enumerated. "Also..." he was visibly endeavouring to remember as many details as he could: "In the forest, I was... killing youkai, I think? And you were watching me. I'm not really sure. There was snow everywhere. This is weird..." Allen lowered his head and was now more talking to himself than to Kanda. "I feel like I've already seen that scene somewhere, but at the same time, this sounds ridiculous... I don't understand..."

While Allen was muttering to himself, Kanda was slowly starting to realize the meaning of the boy's words without really wanting to believe it at first. Yet, he had to make sure before jumping to conclusions.

"... and when I was in my room, I think we were quarrelling about something, but I don't know wh..."

"Oi." Kanda interrupted Allen.

"Yes?"

"Shut up for a second and come here." he ordered dryly.

"What for?"

But Kanda merely emitted a sound of annoyance as he pulled Allen to him and wrapped his arms around the smaller figure.

"Wha-!" Allen started, but his protests died in his throat when Kanda submerged him with his energy – literally. The amount of energy he was receiving wasn't even comparable to the previous time; this time was on a whole other level, as if Kanda wanted him to drown him by sending him successive tidal waves of energy.

And to Allen, it was as if he was suddenly swept away by a stream of unidentified scenes rolling past his eyes and filling his head with countless pieces of information, threatening to blow up his skull. He shut his eyes tight and held his head between his hands in an attempt at not losing himself in the flow of images coming at him continuously.

_A fire in a shed. Kanda fighting a wolf demon. Contempt._

_A night walk in the temple. Kanda mocking him. Disdain._

_A shrine in the middle of the forest. Kanda appearing from the broken altar. Awakening._

_A lake. Kanda glaring at his soaked and trembling figure. Scorn._

_A room. Kanda claiming him with unsuspected passion. Lust._

_A burning tea house. Kanda appearing from the middle of the flames. Worry._

_A forest again. Kanda slashing a spirit of memories. Powerlessness._

The scenes kept streaming past him at dizzying speed, but now not only could Allen see them clearly, but he could also _feel_ the various emotions which were conveyed in them, and strangely enough, it seemed that some of them weren't his own emotions, as if he was borrowing them from someone else.

The images weren't mere images anymore. They were true experiences, real memories piecing themselves together like an unfinished puzzle and progressively rebuilding the foundations of someone's life – Allen's life.

The young Exorcist had no clue how much time passed until he completely absorbed the rush of memories but when he finally managed to get a grip on himself, the last sunrays were slowly disappearing behind the horizon. He blinked several times, as if he had just woken up from a deep sleep, and realized he was still being held firmly by Kanda. He didn't even try to free himself from the embrace, and neither did Kanda release him.

Allen raised his eyes to his shikigami who was staring at him with an undecipherable expression on his face and opened his mouth as if to say something, but the words wouldn't come out. It was Kanda who spoke first:

"So?" he merely asked.

A faint smile graced Allen's lips as he replied:

"Kanda..."

"Did you retrieve all your memories?"

Allen lowered his head again, still trying to recover his senses, before he went on:

"Where to begin?" he said softly. "I... I feel as if a part of me has been given back to me, but not entirely."

"What do you mean?" Kanda asked, frowning. With a sigh, Allen went on:

"I know I'm supposed to be fifteen, but I can't recall anything of the past three years. I know how I met you, I know how you became my shikigami, I know everything we did together, but... I don't know how I became like this. I remember fighting youkai, but I don't even know when in heaven I learnt how to fight them! I know I live at the Temple of the Black Order, I can name the faces of the people there, but I can barely tell anything else about them. It's like... some pieces are still missing."

"Are you sure about that? Try to concentrate." Kanda insisted.

"I've been trying, but no matter how much I force myself to remember, it's completely blank." Allen replied, shaking his head in defeat.

"Then I'll give you more energy."

"I don't think it'll help. Listen, when you sent me all those memories, I felt something more than my own impressions. I felt yours as well, Kanda."

"Wh-"

"Let me finish." Allen interrupted him. "During the request at the lake, I felt contempt. On the first times you talked to me, I felt disdain. In many of the memories, I felt negative emotions that weren't mine, and if they aren't yours, then who could they belong to? You're the only one I know who's able to display such a high amount of haughtiness. And the few times we..." Allen paused, suddenly blushing as he recalled the overwhelming desire he had felt when _those_ memories were brought up. "Never mind." he finished, shaking his head.

As he was speaking, Allen stepped back and looked at his shikigami:

"I think that the fact that you were in all the memories I got back and the fact that I could feel what you felt aren't a coincidence. Also, I absolutely cannot remember anything about the other people except for the moments where you were with me. For instance, I know that the man named Komui is my superior, but I can't remember what my opinion on him is. I can't explain it, but I suppose it has something to do with the fact that you used our energy bond to give me back memories."

"So you're telling me that you only retrieved the memories we have in common?"

"I suppose so."

"Che, you're as annoying as ever."

A sad smile appeared on Allen's lips.

"You don't need to tell me, I know how you feel about me now. But I have to admit I didn't imagine you could despise me to that extent."

"And so what? Are you going to whine about it?" Kanda asked dryly.

The question made Allen chuckle.

"Oh no, certainly not, because among all the memories I got back, there were some of them where you were definitely not unhappy with me." As Kanda cocked an eyebrow, the boy went on with a more cheerful tone: "Well, let's say that I never suspected you to lust after me that much. I'm surprised that a mere human like me can please you like that."

"Don't flatter yourself." Kanda snapped as he resumed walking, but Allen quickly grabbed his sleeve to pull him back, and without any other warning, sealed their lips together.

If there was something that Allen clearly remembered, it was the fascination – or the attraction – he felt for Kanda, and which kept growing a bit more every day to the point that not an hour could pass without him thinking about his shikigami; and the bond linking them didn't help him ease the matter.

Allen slid his hand behind Kanda's neck to pull him closer while discovering once again the delicious taste of a demon's lips. However, and to Allen's slight disappointment, Kanda soon pulled back, saying:

"Che, don't tempt me now. You might regret it."

"I wonder about that."

Again, Kanda raised an eyebrow at the boy's last statement. Had the latest events given him some guts? Well, Kanda wasn't going to complain.

"Let's go back. It's getting late." he merely answered, which made Allen chuckle again.

* * *

It wasn't that Allen didn't want to go back to the temple, but rather, he was apprehensive of meeting all those people he was supposed to know and telling them that he barely had any clue on who they were. And he couldn't rely on Kanda's opinion on them either since most of the time, it was either indifference or disdain.

He let out a small sigh; now that he was standing in front of the temple's entrance, it was a bit too late to worry about those matters. Night had fallen and the only source of light was the huge lanterns hanging at the entrance. He took in a deep breath and crossed the entrance, Kanda by his side.

"It's funny. I know where Komui's work room is, but I don't remember how I know it." he commented.

Kanda merely shrugged. They walked in silence through the court of the temple, and Allen couldn't help but glance at every corner of the place, unable to get rid of the unpleasant feeling of being familiar with his surroundings while barely remembering anything about them. As he walked, the uneasiness in him grew, for he was feeling like a stranger in that place. His incomplete memories were leaving him with gaps he couldn't fill no matter how hard he tried, and those gaps only increased the feeling of insecurity in him.

His only anchor was Kanda, and even if the demon wasn't particularly kind to him, something was telling him that he could rely on him. Maybe it was because of the bond they shared, or maybe it was only Allen's guts, but he truly wanted to believe that Kanda would be able to help him. And he didn't have much choice anyway, Kanda was the only one who he had certain memories of.

"It's here, right?" Allen asked as they stopped in front of a door. As Kanda nodded, the boy knocked and waited for an answer.

"Come in." a voice replied from inside.

As Allen obeyed and stepped in, he received the expected reaction from his superior:

"Allen!" Komui exclaimed, putting his paintbrush down. He stood up and hurried to him, and grabbed his shoulders, as if to confirm his presence. "We were dead worried about you! Are you ok? Where were you? What happened?"

"I..." Allen had simply no idea what to say to that man whom he was supposed to know.

Komui visibly noticed the confusion on his face, for he stepped back and smiled apologetically:

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't urge you like this. But at least, tell me if you're fine."

"I'm fine." Allen replied, then he glanced at Kanda, expecting him to say something. As his shikigami kept silent, he sighed and went on: "I suppose I have to give you some explanations..."

A loud sigh escaped Allen's lips as he shut the door behind him. The small meeting with Komui hadn't been particularly exhausting, but it had been hard trying to explain to that man that his memories were incomplete, that he knew some details without understanding how he had come to know them. It was as if his retrieved memories were resting on an unstable footing that threatened to collapse at any time.

"I don't want to meet with the others tomorrow morning." he let out flatly.

Of course, Kanda merely shrugged at the comment and Allen didn't take offence at it; it's not like he had really expected an answer after all. They came back silently to Allen's room, and as the boy stepped inside, he gave a look around, recognizing his futon, the box which contained his robes, the folding screen and the painting on the wall. He knew that this place was his home, but at the same time not quite.

"I feel like a stranger here; but at the same time, everything looks familiar to me. Weird, isn't it?" he said out loud, though he was more or less certain that Kanda wasn't even listening to him.

That's why his surprise was real when he heard his shikigami's voice right behind him:

"Then just focus on what's familiar for you and forget about the stranger part."

Allen turned round and raised an eyebrow at Kanda who wasn't even looking at him:

"Since when do you care so much for my well-being?" he asked teasingly.

"I don't. I simply don't want to hear you complain all the time." Kanda snapped, which made Allen laugh.

"Whatever." he replied, still chuckling.

Then he walked to his futon and was about to discard his clothes when he noticed that Kanda had already gone to his usual spot against the wall, eyes closed, and decided to go sit next to him. The faint rustle of his clothes as he sat down made Kanda open his eyes and he glanced at Allen, visibly pissed to be disturbed. The young Exorcist merely ignored the glare, leaning his head on his shikigami's shoulder like he did with Kanrou – except that this time, he wasn't pushed away – and sighed.

"What the hell are you sighing again for?" Kanda asked, annoyed.

Allen didn't reply at first, too busy contemplating the wooden floor for no particular reason. After a while, he finally decided to speak:

"Say, Kanda, your brother told me a rather strange story which he claims to be your own past..."

"Don't mention that bastard in front of me." Kanda interrupted him immediately as he stiffened abruptly enough to shake Allen's head off his shoulder. "And I thought you weren't stupid enough to believe whatever he told you."

"I don't think everything he told me was a lie, actually." Allen replied. "At least let me tell you about the story I heard from him."

"I don't give a damn about it." the demon snapped harshly. "Go sleep if you don't have anything better to say."

"I don't feel like sleeping." Allen didn't get flustered by his shikigami's reaction. Instead, he grabbed his chin and forced Kanda to face him, his silver eyes plunging directly into the displeased marine pupils glaring at him. "I have plenty of questions, and if it's necessary, I'll have to order you to answer me honestly." he said firmly.

"Since when did you become so cheeky, brat?" Kanda asked, smirking.

"Don't change the topic, Kanda." the boy replied, releasing his shikigami. "Now tell me, is it true that you were once a demon with almost no powers at all?"

Of course, Allen had expected the question to irritate or even infuriate Kanda, and he was well-prepared for any reactions that were to come; however, the demon merely stared at him silently for a few seconds before he emitted a grunt of contempt:

"Che, guess by yourself."

Allen wasn't blind; he hadn't missed it when Kanda stiffened, nor did he miss the overflow of a very ancient and almost forgotten rage in those dark blue eyes. He was even certain that if he put his hand over Kanda's, he'd feel it shaking. Despite his shikigami's attempt at hiding it, the truth was crystal clear for Allen. Yet, he wanted to hear it from Kanda's mouth, not to torture him, but to try and understand what it was that had turned a harmless demon into a bloodthirsty legend.

"This isn't an answer, Kanda. Tell me honestly what I want to know."

"You're annoying. Just go sleep already." Kanda replied dryly.

"Do I have to order you to answer me?"

At those words, the black-haired youkai pushed Allen away and stood up abruptly, then glared at the boy who was still sitting on the floor.

"What for?" he asked harshly. "You already know the answer. Just seeing that look of pity in your eyes makes me sick." he added, more than irritated. "I don't need pity, and certainly not from you, Moyashi."

"Kanda, you're wrong. I'm not..." Allen started as he stood up as well, but was quickly interrupted:

"Shut up. I'm not in the mood to talk."

"You never are, that's your problem, Kanda." the Exorcist retorted.

"No. My problem, right now, is you. You have a detestable past, so do I. There's nothing more to add."

"You don't get it! Just listen to me for once, will you?" Allen started raising his tone. "What I want to know is how, just how you became the one you are now. How did you acquire your powers if they weren't inborn? How did you manage to get that strong if it wasn't in your blood? How d..."

"Don't get the wrong idea." Kanda cut in on him icily. "The blood of my kin is filled with tremendous power. But it happens once every thousands years that the power is dormant and needs to be awakened. I merely awakened mine, end of the story."

"How did you do that?" Allen insisted, fuelling Kanda's exasperation.

"None of your business. Or maybe the reason you're so eager to know is because you also hope to turn from the insignificant worm you are into a powerful Exorcist worth praising?" the demon spat. "Then let me tell you something: you'll never reach my level, stupid moyashi."

Silence filled the room, leaving an uneasy atmosphere floating around them. Allen's head was slightly lowered and his face was partly covered by silver bangs, but the faint shaking of his fists indicated that he was clearly angry and trying to repress his anger.

"Maybe you're right." he finally said with a low voice. "Maybe I wasn't worth anything, maybe I was an insignificant worm." He raised his defiant eyes to Kanda. "But that version of me disappeared along with my memories. I do remember how I was at first when I met you, but I also remember improving a lot, enough to make you feel satisfied for having me as your master. I felt it, Kanda. Don't forget it."

The demon's eyes glittered with something close to fury.

"Don't fool yourself, little brat. It's not because you gained some powers that I'll acknowledge you're worth something."

"Then I'll prove you wrong, and I'll force you to acknowledge me."

"Che, only desperate brats like you would speak that way." Kanda snapped back.

"This is getting nowhere." Allen went on, shaking his head. He paused a few seconds, trying to cool down before he resumed talking: "We're both on the edge and speaking nonsense. Kanda, I'm sorry if I hurt you by inquiring about your past, but..."

"As if a wimp like you could hurt me."

"...but you're my shikigami, and no matter how much I forgot, I still remember that I care for you." Allen went on, ignoring Kanda's interruption. "Maybe you don't believe me, but it's true and I just want to support you in any way I can."

"Che, such words coming out of your mouth is unusual." Kanda sneered.

"I told you, my old self disappeared along with the memories I had when you weren't with me. Now, the only thing that's left to me is how I feel about you and I don't care if the old me wasn't brave enough to tell you what he really thought."

"I don't care about what you think of me. You should have remembered that, at least."

"I know you don't care about anything. But I do, whether you want it or not. That's why I wish you could trust me, even a bit, even if you're a demon and I'm a human being." Allen paused an instant to sigh briefly before he went on: "But I can't force you to talk to me if you're unwilling to. For now, I suppose we should get some rest and see how things will go tomorrow. Good night, Kanda."

He walked back to his futon without a single look for Kanda, and started removing his several layers of clothes. Maybe it was because he was too exhausted, or maybe it was because he was plunged too deeply into his own thoughts, but he failed to hear the light steps of Kanda as he came closer, right behind him. It was only when he felt something warm pressing against his bare back and silky strands tickling his shoulders that he started.

"Kan..."

A pair of arms wrapping around his chest and pulling him backward silenced him. Immediately after, a shiver ran down his spine when he felt Kanda's lips brush against his exposed neck. Damn, Kanda knew exactly which spots could break all his defences, and he didn't hesitate to make extremely good use of his knowledge. With mere gestures, without any words, Kanda was able to make Allen's heart race uncontrollably.

_This is crazy. He's driving me crazy._

During a second, he was tempted to protest but at that same moment, he remembered the fire of Kanda's passion whenever he yielded to the demon's embrace, the overwhelming need burning in Kanda's body when the latter was entering him and the ecstasy taking over the demon when Allen pleaded him for more. The young Exorcist had been able to feel all those emotions and it was enough to shatter his faltering will to resist.

No matter how upset he was with Kanda, the mere memory of the violence with which his shikigami desired him rendered any hard feelings impossible. And Allen definitely couldn't deny his own pleasure at the mere contact of his skin against Kanda's; he craved for Kanda's touch with an intensity that equalled Kanda's own lust, and right now, as he was laid down on the futon by the gorgeous demon, it seemed to him that their quarrel was a far-off memory. And since Kanda's way of thinking was far different from that of a normal human being, Allen was almost certain the demon had already forgotten about it.

"Do you want me that much, Kanda?" he almost whispered, his large, opaline eyes meeting with the blazing look of his shikigami.

"Do you even need to ask? Idiot." the latter replied before sinking his teeth in the pale skin of the boy's neck.

Of course Allen didn't need to ask. He had _felt_ it in the middle of the powerful flows of memories that had submerged him back then. Still, he needed words to reassure himself.

However, Kanda provided him with something much more intense than mere words; and soon, the barely lit room was filled with soft cries and pleas muffled by the faint rustle of fabric and the damp sound of lips meeting with passion.

On that night, Allen realized how much he was desired, and he let himself be taken by Kanda again and again, and even after he thought his body couldn't stand it anymore, his own longing for his shikigami prompted him to ask Kanda to hold him one more time, and the demon could only comply without restraint, even though he wondered at some point where Allen found enough stamina to go on; perhaps it was the demonic energy in him that was affecting him physically or perhaps he was simply overzealous, but Kanda couldn't care less.

Their bodies were moving in unison in a never-ending motion where Allen's slow pace alternated with Kanda's quicker rhythm; allowing both of them to either enjoy a progressive ascent to the pinnacle of bliss or experience sudden bursts of rapture. It was impossible to tell who between Kanda and Allen was losing himself the most in the other's embrace, for they both were equally captured by each other's calls.

Hours passed. If time had never really mattered to Kanda, right now it mattered even less. The only thing that mattered to him was that his master was in an incredibly voracious and greedy mood and that it was his duty – as his faithful shikigami – to attend to his needs. After having driven Allen to the pits of pleasure for the fourth time, his eyes lingered on the boy underneath him; the sight of that warm, shuddering and panting body covered with both their seeds never ceased to fascinate him.

"Kan...da..."

The demon felt a hand on his cheek and his eyes turned to Allen who was gazing at him expectantly through his hazy silver eyes. The kid's forehead was sweat-damped, his cheeks couldn't have been more flushed and heavy pants were escaping his parted lips; yet he was asking for more. Kanda frowned slightly.

"Enough." he said. "You won't be able to withstand any more of this."

"I will..." Allen breathed between two pants.

"Che."

It wasn't that Kanda wanted to stop, but humans were fragile beings and could break so easily between a demon's hands. Yet, as Allen slipped both his arms around his neck and pulled him closer to join their bodies once more, Kanda didn't resist.

* * *

Allen thought he was about to pass out from exhaustion. Every single of his limbs were trembling and couldn't move the slightest bit, which made him sigh.

"I did warn you." Kanda merely stated. The youkai was sitting cross-legged by Allen, looking perfectly healthy. The boy glared at him.

"How come you're not even tired?" he asked.

"Che, don't compare me to you." Kanda replied, shrugging. "Are you really unable to move?"

"Is that concern you're trying to show?"

"Idiot. As if I'd concern myself for you." the demon snapped, making Allen chuckle.

"Well, given how you barely restrained yourself, it's not a surprise that I can't feel my limbs anymore."

"You weren't complaining a few minutes ago. And I warned you." Kanda repeated.

"I know, I know." Allen replied, slightly annoyed, before yawning his head off. "Can you at least clean me up before I fall asleep?"

"Che, brat."

Despite the harsh tone, Kanda grabbed a corner of Allen's robe and started cleaning the boy's chest, not missing how the latter shivered at the touch.

Allen closed his eyelids heavy with sleep, enjoying the soft fabric rubbing against his skin like a relaxing massage. Kanda knew how to be gentle, at least. While his shikigami was busy cleaning him, his mind started drifting progressively to a state of drowsiness, unable to resist the extreme tiredness seizing his whole body. He didn't even know when he started losing consciousness to let himself be taken by the lazy currents of slumber.

As Kanda was done, he glanced at his master only to notice that the latter was deeply asleep. With a 'che', he pulled the sheets over his body before putting out the lamp.

* * *

"_This is not good." the first said._

"_Indeed, it's actually very bad." the second said._

"_He can't remain in that state." the third said._

"_He has to go to that place." the fourth said._

"_There he will find the answers he seeks." the fifth said._

"_The place where his fate was bound." the sixth said._

"_The place where all our power was gathered." the seventh said._

"_He has to be led there somehow." the eighth said._

"_The curse will lead him." the seventh said._

"_He has to feel the curse." the sixth said._

"_We will make him feel it." the fifth said._

"_The power of the eight ancestors will break the spell." the fourth said._

"_And then, he will be able to fight again." the third said._

"_Make him feel the curse." the second said._

"_I will make him feel the curse that will lead him to the place where his fate was bound and the power of the eight ancestors gathered there will break the spell that prevents him from fighting." the first said._

"_So be it." the seven others said in unison._

Something resonated inside Allen's chest, like a strong drumbeat that made his whole body quiver under the shock. He woke up with a start, thinking for a second that the sound was coming from outside; but as he tried to listen carefully to any other potential noise, only silence responded to him.

And then, a voice rang in his mind. Not a normal voice that could be heard with ears, but rather a mental call addressing him through a wave of thoughts that weren't his, imprecise, blurry yet very clear at the same time. There was something he had to do, and though he was unable to explain why, he knew it was necessary for him to comply and follow the call.

"But I don't even know what I'm supposed to do..." he murmured, slightly puzzled.

"Seems like you're able to move again, Moyashi." a voice interrupted his thoughts.

Allen raised his eyes to his shikigami, having completely forgotten about his presence for a whole minute, then nodded.

"I'm fine now." he paused, before he went on hesitantly: "But... I think something strange happened to me. I don't know how to describe this, but... I feel the need to go somewhere for some reason."

"Are you sure you're that fine?" Kanda sneered. "Maybe the past night actually affected your mind too."

"I'm serious, Kanda!" Allen retorted. "And I can assure you my mind is fine!"

"And where would you have to go?" Kanda asked, obviously barely convinced.

"That's the problem. I think I know how to go there, but I don't know where it is." the boy replied. Seeing the strange look Kanda was giving him, he shook his head and added dryly: "It's not like I expected you to understand. Never mind that."

"Che, annoying brat."

Allen ignored the last comment with a shrug. It was morning already, and Komui had asked him to meet him in his work room to discuss with the other teachers about the next decisions to be made. Though reluctantly, he got dressed and walked to the door. He didn't want to go and face those unknown people who'd certainly ask him plenty questions to which he wouldn't know how to answer; yet, as he opened the wooden panel, the mere feeling of Kanda's presence right behind him was enough to give him the will he lacked.

-  
Done with this chapter! Now I hope the reason why I made Allen lose his memories is a bit more obvious. If it's not, then I fear my skills are more sucky as I thought.  
And if you liked this chapter, I'd be glad if you dropped a review :]


	24. Another world

Disclaimer: I only own the Yullen sets I'm making.

Thanks to **Klappy** for being my beta!

* * *

**Chapter 24 – Another world**

"Allen, this is Cross Marian. He's..."

"I remember him." Allen cut Komui short. "He's the one who brought me here. I can remember that far."

"Oh, fine then."

What Allen didn't add was that even now, he still remembered the nightmarish trip from his town to the temple; a trip during which he had made countless attempts at fleeing, resisting and had spent most of his time crying for the man to bring him back to Nara. These weren't the kind of memories he enjoyed recalling, but they were the only ones that came to his mind when he saw the scarlet-haired man sitting by Komui's table. It made him deduce easily that during his three years of training, Cross Marian had never crossed his path, which increased Allen's resentment towards him. He had brought him to the temple, and then he had dumped him.

Next to Cross Marian were his former teachers, Nine and Tiedoll. Allen couldn't remember much about them and the only feeling he possessed from Kanda was mere indifference. Well, it was better than the usual contempt or hatred he bore for almost every living thing on this world.

"You can't remember a damn thing except for when you were with your shikigami?" Cross asked with a not so kind tone.

Allen clenched his fists hidden by his broad sleeves. He disliked the man, but managed to put up a cool face as he nodded curtly.

"It's pretty inconvenient, but at least, you're safe, Allen. And that's what matters right now." It was Tiedoll who spoke this time. His kind and reassuring voice was a complete contrast with Cross', and Allen immediately felt more at ease, despite the grunt Cross emitted at those words.

"What matters is that you're still able to practise exorcism and fight properly," he corrected. "As long as you still remember that, then recovering your other memories can wait."

"Cross, I don't think..." Komui started, but the former interrupted him:

"We are in a state of emergency. There's no time to waste on something that can be done after the Earl is taken care of. Komui, the whole country's been under youkai attack for months, and even our own shikigami are losing their minds. Some areas are completely devastated and if we keep lagging behind, then this country will be wiped off the map in no time."

Cross grabbed a scroll on the table and stood up, visibly very impatient and annoyed.

"This," he said, brandishing the scroll, "is the latest report I received from my sources about the Earl's activities. He's gathering all his underlings at Mount Shiomi for some reason, but when I went there to have a closer look, I found nothing. Absolutely nothing. Not even a trace of some recent activities. Which brought me to the following conclusion: there's a very powerful barrier set there, and even I haven't been able to break it." He paused a second, then added: "However, I think there's someone here who could." His eyes turned to Kanda, who merely gazed back at him with sheer disdain.

Silence filled the room during several seconds, before Tiedoll finally spoke:

"Kanda? Could you do it?"

"Che, and what makes you think that I could?" the youkai asked back.

"Probably the fact that your clan used to utilize those kinds of barriers to conceal its presence." Cross replied casually.

At that moment, Allen felt a sudden rush of animosity towards the man; however, he knew immediately that the feeling didn't come from him, but from Kanda. He glanced at his shikigami and the face the latter was pulling couldn't mean anything good. Every pair of eyes was now turned to Kanda who was glaring silently and murderously at Cross, and all of them were obviously expecting the demon to speak, however the latter didn't pronounce a word.

"Well, am I right?" Cross insisted, not flinching. "And Mount Shiomi should also bring back some memories, if I'm not mistaking."

"How do you know." It was clearly not a question, given the tone Kanda had used, but rather an order for Cross to explain himself.

"I have my own information, you see. Now do you mind answering?"

"Che, there are barely any barriers I can't break, contrary to you powerless humans." Kanda said dryly.

"That's good to know." Tiedoll quickly intervened to ease the tension in the room. "So, basically it means we have to go to Mount Shiomi and find out what's happening there."

"But given the protections they seemed to have put in that area, we should expect the expedition to be quite dangerous." Nine commented. "We can't simply send Walker and his shikigami there alone. On the other hand, some Exorcists also have to stay here to protect the city."

"We can't go there without any preparation either." Tiedoll added. "We don't know what's going on there, and the more Exorcists are sent, the more casualties there may be."

"But..." Cross started before being interrupted by Nine:

"It'd be foolish to rush there head on without knowing what awaits us. If some Exorcists are sent there, they must make sure to be as discreet as possible."

Allen was getting tired of these pointless and repetitive talks which he was only half listening to. His mind was more focused on the feeling that had been bugging him since he woke up that morning; he still couldn't comprehend where it came from nor could he grasp the meaning of that silent call that kept prompting him to do something.

_The world of demons._

Allen jumped and gave a quick look around him, in search for the origin of the voice he'd just heard.

"Allen, what is it?" Komui inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Didn't you hear that?" Allen asked back.

"Hear what?"

"That voice, just now…"

"A voice? Allen, we were talking among us, that's…"

"No, that's not it!" the boy raised his tone before realizing he might have sounded too harsh. On a softer tone, he added: "I mean, I heard a voice saying 'the world of demons' right now. I'm sure it wasn't my imagination."

This time, it was Kanda's turn to frown at those words, but he wasn't the one who spoke first.

"The world of demons? You sure that voice or whatever it was said that?" Cross asked, earning a short nod from Allen. The man shook his head. "This is nonsense and there isn't time to dwell on it. You probably dreamt about it and suddenly remembered it. We have to focus back on what's urgent."

"But…" Allen started to protest.

"I'm telling you we don't have enough time." Cross interrupted him dryly. "Given the current situation, it's possible for the country to witness an unprecedented tidal wave of uncontrolled youkai in the coming weeks. And that includes shikigami as well," he added, his eyes clearly directed at Kanda who glared back at him. "That's why it's absolutely necessary for both of you to go to Mount Shiomi as soon as possible and deal with whatever is causing the youkai to run amok."

_You must enter the world of demons._

This time, Allen managed to conceal his startle though Kanda didn't miss his stiffening. It wasn't a mere voice, it was exactly like his dream; a call, something prompting him to go somewhere and he was unable to resist it. Deep inside, a strange feeling was ordering him to follow the voice in spite of whatever Cross or anyone else could demand him.

"It's extremely dangerous to send those two without knowing what awaits them there." Tiedoll said calmly. "Even with Kanda's strength, I doubt they will be able to face the Earl and all his underlings at the same time. However, I agree that we have to take action as quickly as we can or soon we won't be able to regulate the rush of wild youkai."

"The kid and his shikigami are the only ones who're able to stand the Earl's powers, along with us three." Cross retorted, and by 'three', Allen guessed it meant, Cross, Nine and Tiedoll. The man turned to the young Exorcist:

"You have to leave right now to Mount Shiomi and…"

"No." Allen replied abruptly. As expected, Cross frowned at the sharp answer.

"What do you mean by 'no'?" he asked dryly. "Don't you understand the situation we're in?"

"I do, but there's something more urgent for me to do." Words flowed out of Allen's mouth instinctively. "As long as I'm not done with it, I can't go face the Earl. I can't explain what it is yet, but I know there's a task for me to achieve first; I feel it's necessary for me to do it before I go to Mount Shiomi," he explained clearly and firmly.

"Hey, hey, what kind of nonsense are you blabbering about?" Cross asked, an obvious hint of irritation in his tone. "It's not because you lost part of your memory that you can use it as an excuse to say whatever is convenient to you."

"Allen, we're in a state of emergency." Komui added on a softer tone. "I understand that you are troubled by the current events, but you also have to understand that we can't afford wasting any more time."

"I'm not trying to find an excuse nor am I trying to waste your time!" Allen suddenly snapped. Why couldn't those people get it? He had to do whatever he was meant to do. He felt that if he didn't achieve his task first, it'd be pointless to try to defeat the Earl, even if he was unable to explain the source of his certainty. "I keep hearing a voice telling me to enter the world of demons! I know I have to do it somehow, I just do!"

Cross opened his mouth as to say something, but after a second of hesitation, he merely shook his head out of irritation and made a dismissal gesture with his gloved hand. On the other hand, Tiedoll, who had remained as calm as ever, walked towards Allen and patted the boy's shoulder with a kind smile.

"Allen, do you know what the world of demons is?" he asked, visibly taking the Exorcist off guard. The latter shook his head slowly.

"No, I don't. But I know I have to go there somehow," he replied, not flinching.

"Then I shall explain it to you," the old man declared.

"Tiedoll, we don't have time for that kind of…" Cross started but was cut off by Nine:

"Cross, I'm also interested in what the boy has to do with the world of demons," she said, to everyone's surprise. Allen hadn't expected support from that fine woman whom he could only remember the name, and relief seized him when he heard her add: "I think we should try to see what exactly that voice he's hearing is. In any case, you can send him fight the Earl if he doesn't want to. He'd be killed on the spot."

At those words, Allen heard his shikigami grunt behind his back and a faint smile graced his lips. Of course, Kanda wouldn't let him die.

"Thank you, Cloud." Tiedoll addressed her courteously before turning back to Allen. "So, the world of demons. To put it simply, it's the rumoured place where all the demons, youkai and spirits live originally."

"The place where they live? But they live in our world, don't they?" the white-haired boy asked, troubled.

"Indeed, but as I said, there's a sort of legend stating the existence of another world from where all the youkai came from."

"A legend? So the place doesn't actually exist? But that can't be! I know for certain I have to go there!" Allen protested, obviously desperate to make his point.

"I am convinced that each legend holds part of a truth, and this one is no exception." Tiedoll said reassuringly. "However, I'm afraid I can't help you more than that. I have no idea how to get you there."

"I'll take him there." Kanda's sharp voice startled everyone, including Allen who turned round and stared at him in disbelief.

"You… know how to get there?" he asked carefully.

"Che, and what do you think I am if not a demon?" Kanda snapped dryly. "Of course I know."

"Then how do I…"

"Wait, wait, wait." Komui cut the conversation short. "Kanda, you're implying that the world of demons really exists? But what is it, exactly?"

The black-haired youkai merely shrugged, visibly not inclined to talk more than necessary.

"Can you really bring the kid there?" Cross asked doubtfully.

"I don't like repeating myself." Kanda replied.

Turning to Allen, the red-haired man addressed him coldly:

"If you can get to that place, what do you intend to do there?"

"I-I don't know." Allen replied truthfully. "I just feel that it'll be shown to me once I'm there."

"Great plan." Cross grunted. "And what if it doesn't?"

"It will," the boy asserted firmly. "Even now as we speak, I can perceive something. I'm sure of it."

"You don't even know how that world looks like. It could be very dangerous for a human like you."

"I know how to defend myself and besides, Kanda will protect me." Allen declared without an ounce of hesitation. From behind, he could almost feel Kanda's gaze on him.

"And how much time will it take you to do whatever you have to do?" Cross inquired. "You are very well aware that we're short on time. The longer we wait, the worse the situation gets."

"I know that, but I can't fight unless I go to the world of demons first." Allen stated with assurance, his eyes locked on Cross as if to challenge him. After a few seconds of uneasy silence, the man blinked and looked away, visibly pissed.

"Fine. Do whatever you want," he declared dryly, and Allen's face lightened. "I'm out to Mount Shiomi."

"Do you plan to go there alone?" Komui asked.

"Of course. I want to keep an eye on the potential activities over there and gather as many information as possible while waiting for the brat to come back."

And without waiting for any answer, Cross strode to the door and exited the room. After the panel closed behind him, Komui let out a sigh before turning to Allen and Kanda:

"Kanda, how do you get to the world of demons, actually?"

"Can't tell you how. My powers allow me to go there, that's all. It's not something the demons usually talk about, especially to humans." Kanda merely replied.

"I see… and you'll make sure Allen will be fine, right?"

Obviously, the question offended Kanda, for his sole answer was a 'che' before he left the room as well. Surprised by his shikigami's reaction, he apologized quickly to the three remaining adults and ran after Kanda.

Once outside, he spotted the long-haired demon walking towards the temple's entrance and called him:

"Kanda! Where are you going?" But as he received no answer, he sped up to catch up to Kanda and pulled him by the sleeve. "Kanda, where…"

"Just shut up and come," the other replied dryly.

With a sigh, Allen complied and followed him silently. They walked towards the forest, though not in a direction that was known to Allen, or at least, not what was left of his memories. At that thought, he suddenly realized the extent of the void in his mind and it fell on him like a sharp blade. He had no recollection of the past three years of his life, the only memories he had were all linked to Kanda and it frustrated him to no end that Kanda was the only one he could trust at the moment.

On the other hand, it wasn't that bad to give all his trust to his shikigami, for he knew that at least, he couldn't be betrayed thanks to the contract binding them. Nonetheless, Allen was convinced that Kanda didn't protect him only because it was his duty even though the demon liked denying it.

_'...and besides, Kanda will protect me.'_Those words had sounded so nice when Allen had pronounced them. He opened his mouth and articulated his lips mutely, enjoying how those words sounded well in his head. _Protect me._Kanda was the only one Allen needed in order to live and survive, and he didn't mind depending entirely on that single demon, which sometimes surprised even him.

His hand unconsciously reached for Kanda's next to him, making the demon glance at him with a frown, but as the latter saw how Allen was absorbed in his own thoughts, he merely let him do.

They had been walking for half an hour in the forest until Allen stopped suddenly, still holding Kanda's hand.

"Kanda, what's this?" he asked out of the blue.

"Che, so you can feel it too," his shikigami said. "Damn brat, you're closer to a demon than to a human."

"I'm-what?"

"You're standing on one of the gates that open to the world of demons, as you call it. What you're feeling is the energy emanating from that gate, though only a few demons can feel it, and therefore open the gates."

"Is it because I share some of your demonic energy? Do the demons often go to that world? Is it really where you live? And how do you call that world?" A profusion of questions suddenly rose in Allen's head, but he soon shut his mouth at the annoyed glared he received from Kanda. "Sorry," he apologized, lowering his head.

A second of silence followed before Kanda spoke again, though dryly:

"Che, it's probably because your energy is mixed with mine. No, we don't go there often. And we certainly don't live there. As for the name, it doesn't have one because it doesn't need one. Happy?"

Allen smiled at the answer and nodded.

"If you're done with your silly questions, maybe I can open the gate," the youkai said, to Allen's puzzlement.

"Now? But we didn't inform anyone at the Temple! They're going to wonder…"

"Do you want to go there or do you prefer wasting more time on useless talks?" Kanda cut him in sharply.

"Well I…"

Hesitation and doubt suddenly took over Allen. What if he was wrong? What if it was only his imagination? It seemed so rushed for him. The day before, he couldn't even hear that voice echoing in his head, and now it was telling him to go to a world which he didn't even know existed a few hours ago. Maybe he was getting insane, or maybe he had already heard that voice before but couldn't remember it? Maybe the best choice was to go confront the Earl directly, after all. No matter how unpleasant it was to admit it, but perhaps Cross Marian was right.

Confusion started spreading in his mind.

_Enter the world of demons._

And again, the call. Allen shook his head as if to get rid of it, unsuccessfully.

"Oi, Moyashi." Kanda called as he saw the boy's troubled face.

"Kanda, I… I'm not so sure about this anymore. I don't know what I'll find in that world of yours, nor do I know if my choice is the right one. I…"

"I'll protect you."

Allen's heart leapt in his chest at those words as he raised his eyes to Kanda. The latter wasn't looking at him, but as he turned his dark blue pupils to him and gazed at him intensely, Allen's lips stretched into a sincere smile.

"Thank you," he murmured.

"Che, those were your own words, idiot. It's not like I protect you because I like it."

"Maybe it's because you like me, rather?" Allen taunted him; however, to his utmost surprise, Kanda didn't flare up at those words. Instead, he merely glared at him.

"Don't flatter yourself," he said.

"Is this your way of telling me I'm not that wrong?" the Exorcist teased him a bit more.

"You little…" Kanda started but was interrupted when Allen wrapped both his arms around his shikigami's neck and pressed their lips together, once again taking Kanda off guard.

The damn kid had really improved in cockiness, he thought. Kanda smirked mentally. It wasn't bad. Among all the Exorcists he had been forced to serve, the ninth was by far the most interesting.

Allen pulled back, a satisfied look displayed on his face.

"Thank you," he repeated, "for protecting me."

"Che, insolent brat. I'll open the gate now."

As Allen nodded, Kanda uttered a word which the boy failed to understand, and the next second, it was as if a huge and invisible hammer fell on his head.

The world collapsed around him and there was nothing left but blackness.

* * *

"Oi, Moyashi," a familiar voice rang to his ears.

Allen slowly opened his eyes and blinked several times. Kanda's face became progressively less blurry, as well as his surroundings. He was still in the forest, but it didn't look like the same forest in which he had passed out. He was now half lying on the ground, his back against Kanda's arm, and his head ached. A lot.

"What happened?" he asked with some difficulties.

"The change of flow knocked you out." Kanda explained. "Che, you're going to have trouble bearing with this world."

"Change of flow? What do you mean?" Allen inquired as he sat up tentatively, holding his head with one hand.

"The flow of energy, of course." Kanda replied, annoyed. "The spiritual energy surrounding you is far more chaotic and unstable than in the human world."

"But we're still in the human world, aren't we?" the Exorcist asked as he gave a quick look around him.

"Che, no. If we were, you wouldn't look like you're in so much pain." Kanda sneered.

"I don't understand. This place looks quite normal."

"Who ever said it had to look different?"

"I don't know. I suppose I'd imagined that the world of demons would be completely different, with countless youkai roaming all over the place."

"Then your imagination is very limited."

"So your world is exactly the same as mine?"

"Not really."

Allen had expected Kanda to develop on that point, but the latter didn't seem willing to add anything more. He sighed loudly and stood up carefully, wincing in the process as his head was hammered by a throbbing pain like a terrible hangover.

"Care to explain a bit more about this world?"

"Don't you have anything else to do?" Kanda asked back dryly. "I didn't bring you here so you could admire the landscape."

"Yes, you're right. But this spiritual energy…" Allen muttered, "It makes me feel rather uneasy; it feels so… stained and impure."

"Che, of course it is. Where do you think we are? And you should be grateful to possess some of my energy in you; otherwise I bet you wouldn't even have managed to stand." Kanda said very seriously.

"You could have warned me beforehand." Allen retorted, but his shikigami merely shrugged. Seeing that Kanda didn't seem in the mood to argue any further, the Exorcist decided to focus back on his task.

He stepped forward but his dizzy head caused him to almost fall on the ground.

"Oi, watch out." Kanda warned as he caught him by the arm.

"I'm trying to, but this is really annoying. I'm not used to being wrapped by such an amount of evil energy." Allen explained, panting slightly.

"Where do you have to go?"

"I…" Allen paused, then closed his eyes to try and focus on the faint sensation that kept stirring in his stomach and was prompting him to move. After a moment, he finally pointed to a direction.

"This way," he said. He made another step forward but his foothold was unstable. He managed to keep his balance nonetheless and after a while, he started getting used to the constant headache induced by the demonic energy though his whole being felt nauseous.

Unnoticed by Allen, his shikigami was following right behind him, watching him carefully in case he were to fall on the ground once again. They walked silently on a path which even Allen couldn't tell where it led, for he was discovering it after each of his steps, merely guided by the strange sensation pulling him irresistibly towards an unknown goal.

However at some point, Allen leant against a tree, feeling too wobbly to keep walking any farther. He tried to take a deep breath in and force his head to stop spinning like a tossing boat, with not much success.

"Che, brat." Kanda commented with obvious disdain.

"Unlike you… I'm not a demon…" Allen replied, though his weakened state didn't allow him to sound as harsh as what he'd wanted. He was panting slightly under the effort, but the glare he gave Kanda was eloquent enough.

Then, like a sudden click, his face lit up.

"Kanda, you said that I was able… to stand this world because… I share some of your energy, right?" Not giving his shikigami the time to reply, he went on: "Is there any way you can give me more of it?"

The black-haired youkai frowned deeply at the question, visibly not expecting such a request from Allen.

"Che. Not that long ago you were horrified by the mere idea of having some demonic energy in you, and now you're asking for more?" he asked with more than a hint of irony.

"It may help me feel… less sick…" Allen wanted to add more, but the effort it cost him convinced him to spare his breath.

"It could also have unknown side-effects on you."

Allen cocked an eyebrow and gave Kanda a malicious look.

"Are you worried about me?" he asked, a smile at the corner of his lips. As expected, Kanda's eyes darkened in irritation and the demon walked closer to his master before pulling him roughly by the wrist, making Allen bump against his chest. Two arms wrapped around him and immediately after, the young Exorcist gasped as he was enclosed in a powerful aura which he identified to be Kanda's own spiritual energy.

The last time it had happened, Allen was unconscious; but now, his senses were fully awake and Allen couldn't believe what was happening in him. He was experiencing the intense climax of being filled with tremendous power, in a way that was different from when Kanda called him through their energy bond. This time, Allen was under the impression that every fibre of his being wanted to absorb the incoming energy and make it its own; he could clearly feel his own energy reaching for Kanda's hungrily, asking for more power to impregnate him, and the pleasure that was blossoming in him made him quiver violently. Allen knew it was only a minute fragment of Kanda's energy, but if that fragment could arouse such a feeling of sheer delight, then he could easily fathom why Kanda was attracted by that power.

Every inch of his body was set on fire by the overwhelming energy and he was even certain that, at some point, he cried Kanda's name. To him, it was like the many times Kanda had embraced him; the same heat, the same violence and the same bliss. He took in everything Kanda was giving him, yearning for more and instinctively trying to absorb more directly from the demon.

The latter noticed it and smirked as he slowly started subsidizing the energy back into him.

"Eager, aren't we?" he sneered, and his voice seemed to snap Allen out of his entranced state. His cheeks soon took a reddish tint as he realized what he had been doing; and as if it wasn't enough, Kanda added, still smirking: "You're so easy to please, Moyashi. I almost expected you to get aroused."

"S-stop spouting nonsense, Bakanda!" Allen retorted, embarrassed. "You know very well that your energy has that kind of effect on me!"

"Che, at least you don't seem to have any problem bearing with this world anymore."

It took Allen a few seconds to register what Kanda was talking about before he noticed that, indeed, the dizziness in his head was no more. He could still perceive the strong and overwhelming miasma of demonic energy bathing him, but the feeling was similar to detecting the presence of a youkai. There was still a faint, unpleasant sensation which was probably due to his being a human, but at least, he could stand and move normally without feeling sick. And now, in the very core of his being, he could feel Kanda's energy mingling with his and flowing in him in powerful streams. His body was still slightly trembling from the vibrating energy and he couldn't help but let out a sigh of delight.

_Now I'm bound to you more than ever._

Allen chuckled silently. Within a few months only, the changes that had occurred in him were tremendous. From a state where he considered his hatred for youkai unshakable, he had first taken one as his shikigami, had shared its energy and had accepted to merge their beings in the closest way possible.

Maybe Kanda was right, maybe Allen was now more a demon than a human being. And strangely enough, the thought barely disturbed him.

"Oi, do you plan on taking roots here?" Kanda's irritated voice rose behind him.

Turning to his shikigami, Allen shook his head and smiled.

"Let's go. Now I can feel the path very clearly." He made a step forward before stopping again. "Also…"

"What again?" Kanda asked sharply.

"Thank you." Allen merely said before he resumed walking, unaware of the exasperated look he received from Kanda.

The journey went on silently. Hours passed and it was only after a while that Allen started noticing something strange: neither thirst nor hunger had bothered him the slightest bit. As he told his shikigami about it, the latter shrugged.

"I told you this world isn't comparable to yours." he merely said.

"But how can being in this world prevent me from being thirsty or hungry?"

Again, Kanda shrugged and Allen understood he wouldn't succeed in getting an explanation. He'd have to settle for speculations only.

As he kept walking, a dot of light suddenly caught his attention.

"Kanda, it seems we reached the border of the forest," he commented, and as expected, he didn't receive any reply.

Allen was now burning with impatience, for he could feel that he was getting closer and closer to his goal – which he still didn't know what exactly was. Unconsciously, he sped up towards the exit, his heart suddenly pounding in his chest like a drum and an inexplicable presentiment rousing his excitement.

And finally, he stepped out of the forest, and remained dumbstruck. Silver eyes widened, words failed him and he remained there motionless, incapable of moving at the sight unveiled in front of him.

A huge desert. A barren and cracked soil, as dark as a storm cloud with smashed rocks scattered all over the place as if a mountain had exploded to pieces. Eerie columns of yellowish smoke were rising from the thin and long crevasses in a slow and lugubrious sway, and the nasty smell that reached Allen's nose made him wrinkle in displeasure.

Then, there was the sky, if it could be called so. Long stripes of dim green, purple and grey were searing through the cloudless and almost pitch black sky, like huge and sinuous snakes infesting the area. The atmosphere was filled with a sick and unidentifiable plague that made Allen nauseous again. He tottered a bit and stumbled backwards, bumping against Kanda who caught him and held him firmly against him.

"Wh-what's this?" Allen asked, gulping. "I didn't feel anything even when we were at the border of the forest…"

"That's how this world works, Moyashi." Kanda said darkly. "Don't try to find comparisons with your world. But I never expected to come to this place again."

Those last words stirred Allen's curiosity, but as he was about to ask about it, he felt Kanda's embrace getting tighter and he could swear that his arms were slightly trembling.

"Kanda? What's the matter? You know this place?"

The only answer he received was a surge of rage, and Allen knew immediately that it was Kanda's feelings he perceived.

"Kanda?" Allen asked again, more hesitantly.

But the demon kept silent, his grip around Allen getting tighter and tighter to the point that it actually hurt him. The intensity of Kanda's fury was increasing steadily, shaking Allen mentally.

"Kanda! Calm down and let go of me!" he exclaimed as he tried to freed himself.

The call seemed to work, as Kanda quickly loosened his arms around the boy and stepped back. Allen turned round, worry painted on his face. It was the first time he got to see his shikigami in that state. He was used to his outbursts of rage, but not this silent and refrained anger he was witnessing right now.

For an instant, his concern made him forget about his own nausea, and he stepped closer to Kanda who was staring at the scenery in front of him, an undecipherable look in his dark eyes. Allen grabbed Kanda's clenched fist, half expecting him to slap his hand away, but strangely enough, the demon remained immobile.

"Kanda, what is it? Answer me, Kanda!" Allen shook his arm insistently.

"Shut up." Kanda finally replied with a sharp tone. Then he inhaled deeply and turned his eyes to his master who was obviously expecting him to give some explanations. Snatching his hand back from Allen's own, he crossed his arms and looked away, irritated.

"This is the place where I was first sealed," he let out bluntly.

Allen didn't react at first, taking his time to realize what it meant. Then:

"The place where you were first sealed… Then you're implying that my ancestor…"

"... put the curse on me at this very same place." Kanda finished for him, and Allen failed at identifying the tone in his voice.

Both of them remained silent during a whole minute, Allen gazing at his feet and unable to find anything to say while the black-haired youkai looked around him as if to remember the events that had happened hundreds of years ago.

And then, a laugh echoed in the air, startling Allen. It didn't sound like a cheerful child laugh, far from that; rather, the laughter had something disturbing – or disturbed – and it gave Allen chills.

He searched for the source frantically but was unable to make the difference between the evil energy surrounding him and the spiritual energy of a potential youkai. He glanced at Kanda who seemed to have spotted the intruder's location for he frowned deeply while staring at a rock not so far from them.

The next second, a sitting silhouette slowly shaped itself on the rock and as its traits got more precise, Allen's heart failed a beat.

There was no way he could forget about that dark-skinned and spiky-haired girl – no, demon.

-  
And we're done! So yeah, my new hobby is to make forum sets, so if you're on some forums and want an avatar/signature, just drop by my LJ for more info! Hope you liked this chapter as well!


	25. Dusk

Disclaimer: see previous chapters.

* * *

**Chapter 25 - Dusk  
**

There was no mistaking who the youkai was. Allen got into fighting stance, ready to lift his barriers and attack.

"Road..." he murmured. "What are you doing here?"

The girl's sick grin broadened, revealing a line of perfect white teeth.

"Greetings, Exorcist Walker." she said, jumping off the rock on which she was sitting. Then, staring at Kanda, she went on slyly: "And you, Kanda, how does it feel to be standing on the very same place of your defeat?"

As soon as those words were pronounced, Allen knew that things were going to take a very bad turn.

"Kanda, don't let her words affect you." he said hurriedly. "I'll deal with her and..."

"No." his shikigami replied sharply. "Did you forget already? You can't lift your barriers."

"Because of the curse your previous master put on me?" Allen hadn't forgotten. How could he possibly forget that his predecessor had put a curse on him that made him go berserk whenever he felt the Earl's and his underlings' spiritual energies? His only protection were the barriers he had trained to erect; if he were to lift them, the curse would activate and the gods only knew how the whole mess could end.

And last but not least, using his curse would consume his life irrevocably, barely allowing him to reach his mid-twenties. Allen knew it very well, but was there any other way for him to fulfil his duty?

"I'll take care of her." Kanda declared as if to answer Allen's silent question. "You just stay back."

"I can't-" Allen started protesting, but Kanda merely grabbed him by the arm and roughly pushed him aside.

"Stay behind me and don't even think of lifting your barriers!" he snapped angrily.

Not expecting the gesture, Allen remained puzzled for a second before he flared up:

"Don't order me around! I'm your master, Kanda!"

At those words, a glint of fury flashed in Kanda's eyes and it was obvious he had to call forth all his willpower to control the shaking of his body.

"You brat, I'm doing this for your own, damn good!" he spat out.

"Since when do you care for my own good?" Allen retorted. "I refuse to let you fight that demon alone!"

"Well, well, what do we have here?" a feminine voice interrupted them, and both of them suddenly remembered they weren't alone. "The little Kanda-pet is barking at his master? How disrespectful!" Road added, laughing.

The answer came instantly. In an instant, the rock on which she was sitting was smashed to bits, but the demon girl had already jumped away from the attack. Instead of the rock was standing an utterly furious Kanda, Mugen in his right hand.

"I'll make you swallow your words and choke on them." he said threateningly. But before he even had time to charge at Road again, a violent burst of energy shook the area, making Kanda swear angrily.

He turned round to Allen and saw the boy wrapped in a white aura of pure energy, his face distorted in what seemed to be a grimace of pain. The brat was obviously trying to control himself. And he was obviously failing at it. As Kanda stepped forward, Allen held out his hand to stop him.

"W-wait! I can... deal with it by... myself! Don't come near!" he ordered.

At that very moment, something resonated violently inside of Kanda, as if to respond to Allen's energy release. A terrible surge of power swept over the whole area, making the Exorcist stumble; even Road lost her balance and almost collapsed on the ground. Kanda was still standing, but his head felt as if it had been hit by a hammer. Despite the dizziness striking him, he didn't have any trouble recognizing Allen's imprint and his own in the wave of power that had broken on them.

How? The last time Allen had lost control, it hadn't felt like that; there had only been Allen's energy and his predecessor's. But now, it seemed that the latter was replaced by Kanda's demonic energy. However, Kanda didn't have time to dwell on such a detail; his priority was to prevent his idiotic master from wreaking havoc and turning the place to nothingness.

And strangely enough, it seemed that the humongous aura of pure energy around Allen subsided slightly as if to obey Kanda's thoughts. The boy was still struggling, panting heavily and his arms wrapped around himself, but at the same time, _something_ else was helping him control himself and it was only after a second that Kanda realized what it was.

It was his own energy which he had poured generously into Allen not even a few hours ago and which was reacting to his will to force the boy's energy back in him. Obviously, the amount of demonic energy that was mixed with Allen's was more than enough to keep him under control.

"Kanda! Don't you dare turn your back on me!" Road yelled, a fireball in her hand and aiming at the demon in front of her. Kanda turned round quickly, swearing at his own carelessness, and jumped back to avoid the attack. The next second, a spell coming from behind him cleaved through the air like a white and luminous arrow and blasted the spot where Road was standing. The demon girl dodged by a hair's breadth but the explosion grazed her left arm.

Cursing of rage, she got ready to attack again when her eyes landed on Allen and widened.

"What the hell did you do to him?" she asked, dumbfounded and pointing at the young Exorcist behind Kanda.

"As if I'd fall for such a stupid trap!" Kanda snapped back, but at that moment, Allen walked past him, gazing straight at Road.

Even Kanda didn't manage to hide his stupefaction as he saw his master walking forward. The flow of energy enveloping him was still erratic, as if it was fighting against the pressure that Kanda's energy was putting on it; but what astounded the demon was Allen's appearance.

Among the white hair, golden strands were floating around his face, as gold as the most polished amber. His pupils had also changed their colour, leaving no trace of the usual light grey irises. Instead, they were of the same golden tint as the strands of hair, though darker. His skin had taken a different shade as well, more tanned and matching the colour of his eyes. As Kanda grabbed his arm and forced the boy to face him, he saw the exact same look he had once seen during their first encounter with Tyki: the look of a hunting demon and ready to kill.

Allen slapped Kanda's hand away, glaring at him with contempt:

"I told you not to come near, didn't I? I can deal with that low youkai by myself." he declared icily.

"Who are you calling 'low youkai'? Impudent Exorcist!" Road let her temper loose. She then muttered something and suddenly, dozens of burning daggers appeared, floating all around her. A mere gesture of her hand, and all the daggers flew at Allen who deflected them easily with a barrier.

"I thought the Earl wanted me alive." he sneered. "Though it's not like you can kill me with that level of skill."

Without waiting any further, he uttered an incantation and several ropes of light came out from the ground and tied themselves around Road's ankles and wrists. The distinct sound of flesh burning was heard, and the demon girl screamed.

"Of course something as filthy as you couldn't possibly stand the contact of a holy spell. Now let's see, how shall I get rid of you?" Allen wondered out loud, a smirk on his lips. It was obvious he was having fun watching Road wriggle and moan in pain.

"Oi, Moyashi! Stop this immediately!" Kanda intervened, seizing his arm again and shaking him. "You're being controlled by your damn curse!"

"I'm not, Kanda." Allen replied, annoyed. "Thanks to the unbelievable amount of energy you put in me, I'm perfectly in control." He turned his eyes to his shikigami, his smirk broadening. "And you know what? Now I understand you. Because I can feel it in your energy, I understand why you like killing and destroying so much. It's thrilling, isn't it? To see those weaker than you kneeling, crawling at your feet and begging for their lives while you tear their bodies apart." He gazed back at Road, who had now fallen to the ground and was still struggling to free herself. "Isn't it a lovely sight? Say, Kanda, I'll do you a favour. You can go kill her if you want. You can torture her as much as you want while I hold her back. What do you think?"

And within a second, Kanda was tempted. His own blood was boiling inside as Allen reminded him of all those sensations he used to experience when he was still free, the pleasure and the satisfaction of bringing despair wherever he went, the utmost rapture at feeling warm blood spilling on his hands, the sweet screams of agonizing creatures... He licked his lips at the thought and slowly turned to Road, already enjoying the entertainment he was offered.

"Kill her." Allen ordered.

"As if I'd let you!" Road shouted, and with a burst of energy, she made the ropes explode. Her wrists and ankles were bleeding a black and thick liquid, she was panting heavily yet her eyes reflected as much fury as ever. "Yes, Allen Walker. We were ordered to let you live, but if I can at least bring back Kanda's head to the Earl, then he'll forgive me for letting Kanrou escape! And now, witness my true power, insignificant human!"

At those words, her shape started changing: her nose and mouth stretched forward, her skin covered with dark green and glistening scales, tearing her purple kimono apart while claws replaced the tip of her fingers; she fell heavily on her arms – or rather, forelegs – as a tail grew at the bottom of her back and stared at her two opponents with huge and yellow eyes slit by vertical black pupils.

A salamander. The size of a tiger. Smoke coming out from its large nostrils. It bared its long and sharp teeth threateningly and as it spoke again, the voice was no more that of a girl.

"Kanda, I'll tear your limbs one by one before I finish with you head." Road growled with a sinister grin.

"Just try." Kanda replied, readying his sword, but before either of them got time to do anything, a hand grabbed Kanda's arm, preventing him from moving.

"A shikigami should obey its master, Kanda." Allen's cold voice interrupted him. "I'm very displeased by your behaviour."

"Stop screwing around! You're not your usual self!" Kanda snapped back, pissed off and ready to snatch his arm back but at that same moment, a strong discharge of energy made him flinch.

"Step back and let me deal with that youkai." Allen ordered icily. "Otherwise I'll really knock you out for sure next time."

"Don't get so cocky! If it weren't for that curse, you'd be already paralysed by fear and unable to do a thing!" It was clear that Kanda's entire body was itching to strangle Allen though he knew he couldn't.

"That's why I thank my predecessor for giving me this cur..."

"Move out!"

The boy didn't have time to finish as his shikigami suddenly jumped on him and carried him away abruptly right when a fireball hit the spot on which he was standing not a second ago.

"Please stop forgetting that I'm still here." Road growled again. Her mouth – or rather, its mouth – was wide open, revealing a blazing throat ready to spit fire again.

"Let go of me, Kanda." Allen said dryly.

The black-haired demon, still holding the boy in his arms, ignored the order.

"You're being influenced by the energy I put in you, Moyashi." he replied with the same tone. "There's no way I can let you fight in that state. You'll only get killed."

"Don't underestimate me! I'm warning you one last time, let go of me or..."

"And I'm not repeating myself once more." Kanda cut him in before punching Allen in the stomach with enough strength to make the boy gasp of pain and pass out in his arms. "It's for your own good, stupid Moyashi." the demon murmured again as he laid his master down on the ground. The overflow of energy surrounding Allen started faltering before it disappeared completely.

A low, twisted laugh echoed in the air.

"So that's how you treat your own master, Kanda!" Road roared, stomping towards them. "Very well, at least he won't bother us anymore. Come now!"

"That was my line." Kanda replied as he stepped forward, grinning evilly.

* * *

"Komui, bad news." Nine said gloomily as she stepped into the man's office.

"Go ahead, I think I'm getting used to that kind of news." he replied humourlessly.

"Lau, you tell him." the woman addressed her shikigami. It had the appearance of a white baboon and was perched on her shoulder. The youkai jumped on Komui's table and directed its crimson eyes to him.

"Good afternoon, Lau." Komui greeted it. Among all the shikigami at the Temple, the baboon was considered the smartest and most ingenious of all, and that's why Komui had asked it to investigate after noticing that neither Allen nor Kanda could be found.

"The young Exorcist and his shikigami have disappeared from this world." it announced gravely. At those words, Komui jumped.

"What do you mean, 'disappeared'? Are they..."

"They travelled to another world, is what I mean." the baboon went on. "I tracked their energies into the forest, as you requested, and the only thing I can tell you is that they disappeared suddenly. I detected a faint disruption on the spot where they disappeared, but I didn't know about its nature. Then a thought crossed my mind and I went hunting a bit. I found a swamp imp which I questioned a bit and it told me that the spot was actually a path to its origins. Swamp imps are pretty stupid creatures, you see, and I had to insist quite a lot to obtain some more usable information. But according to what I managed to squeeze out of it, it seems the young Exorcist and his shikigami have gone to what you call the world of demons."

Komui's eyes widened at those words.

"The world of... so they really went there?" he asked, incredulous.

"Komui, I possess memories from hundreds of years ago and yet none of them ever told me anything about the existence of that world." Lau declared. "However, I'm not infallible. Though I'm pretty sceptical about that world, at this point every track has to be examined. I fear I can't help you more than that."

"I understand." Komui said, nodding. "Where's that swamp imp now?"

By way of reply, the baboon merely licked its chops and patted its belly, a satisfied grin on its face.

"We can't remain inactive like this." Tiedoll decided. "We should go to Mount Shiomi."

"The situation is critical." Nine nodded. She counted on her fingers: "We lost five shikigami since the beginning of this mess, the whole capital is nothing but chaos, the emperor is completely powerless, the priests refuse to go out and help the population, our Exorcists are so exhausted we had to send out some of our pupils to help them..."

"... and it's been six days since Allen disappeared." Komui finished tragically. "We can't afford waiting for him to show some signs that he's still alive."

"Then what do you suggest we do?" Nine asked.

"I fear we have no choice but to do as Tiedoll said, that is to say go to Mount Shiomi." Komui replied. "But Cross hasn't contacted us either and..."

"Everyone here is tired of this situation." Tiedoll intervened coolly. "We are more than ready to take the risk to go there rather than keep going like this. I talked to Lavi when he came back here, and despite his state, he's determined to put an end to the mess even if it means risking his life."

"Losing his life, you mean." Nine corrected. "Anyway, Tiedoll is right; no one is going to stand the situation any longer. Either we make our move now, or we wait for all the youkai to turn wild and decimate us." With a sigh, she added: "And I don't want to wait long enough to see my own shikigami turning against me."

Silence greeted those words, but it was clear that the two other men were thinking the same. Finally, after a while, Komui spoke again:

"Without Kanda, I don't know if we're going to manage..."

"Komui, right now, Kanda and Allen are missing; therefore we have to take care of this matter by ourselves." Tiedoll replied. "I trust Allen, I believe he's special and I'm certain he'll come back. But it doesn't mean he's our only hope. Exorcists like us have existed for centuries and we have always managed to face any crisis. There's no reason this is going to end here."

"I agree. Now, instead of wasting more time chatting, we should decide on who is going to Mount Shiomi." Nine concluded.

* * *

"Earl, Cross Marian is here again." Lulubell reported.

"Again? Stubborn man." the Earl replied. "Our barrier prevents him from seeing the Source and yet he keeps coming here. Well, I guess you could go and greet him, Lulubell. Do however you please, but I want him alive and in a decent state enough to be able to speak."

The female youkai bowed and disappeared.

The Earl then directed his eyes in front of him. There was an altar, made of the blackest stone as if tainted by the most impure energies, with countless youkai sculpted on it. It was broken in half, and from the crack, miasmas of contaminated energy were rising and spreading in the atmosphere like long and eerie tentacles of decay.

The Earl watched the scene with satisfaction. The Source of Origins. It was once a blessed altar that was used to keep the flow of spiritual energy harmonious, to keep the balance between humans and youkai and only the highest ranked priests could come to that place. Never did they think that some demons would dare approach that area, and that was their one mistake.

In less than a day, the Earl and his minions had killed the priests and destroyed the altar. Then, they started defiling the sacred ground, breaking all the protective spells and putting their own jinxes instead and proceeded with reversing the progress of the untainted energy to replace it with the evillest and filthiest ones which the Source would spread around like storm clouds carried by wind.

Every youkai was getting slowly contaminated, one by one, and soon enough the world would belong to them again. A grin stretched the Earl's mouth. Soon enough, indeed, but before that, there was one last obstacle he had to get rid of: the Exorcists and their resistance, no matter how futile. And Kanda. It would be a waste to lose such a valuable demon, but there was no other choice.

"Earl." a voice interrupted his thoughts. He turned round and his grin broadened.

"Tyki-pon! You should still be resting!" he exclaimed at the sight of the injured demon. One of the sleeves of his kimono was hanging freely beside him. Visibly exhausted, Tyki managed to smile anyway:

"I'm fine, Earl. And I heard from Lulubell that Cross Marian is here. If you want, I can go scout outside and..."

"No, no, no. For now, I need you to rest as much as possible. When Kanda comes, I want to make sure he won't get away alive. However, there is something else troubling me..." the Earl added thoughtfully.

"What is it?"

"Do you know where Road is? With her habit of travelling from place to place through her gates, I can't tell where she is now."

Tyki frowned, then shook his head.

"Now that you mention it, it's true that it's been a few days since I last saw her. She's probably still looking for Kanrou. I guess she really feels guilty for letting him flee under her nose."

The Earl seemed to ponder the reply for a moment before he finally spoke again:

"But she knows that I need her here now. I don't care about Kanrou, so she'd better come back here quickly."

* * *

Blood splattered on the ground. Kanda wiped the liquid off his mouth, his eyes focused on the salamander which was bearing several bleeding wounds on its body.

"Be serious, Kanda." Road growled in anger. "What are you waiting for? Just put on your true form already! Or maybe you'd rather be eaten by me? Kanda!"

"Che, I don't need my real form to beat you up." Kanda snapped back as he readied his sword to charge. Road burst out laughing, but it was a twisted and insane laugh.

"You seem to forget something." she merely replied and the next second, she was spitting a large fireball from her mouth, but not in Kanda's direction.

The long-haired demon swore as he understood immediately and rushed to where Allen was lying. It had been a bad idea to knock him out, but letting the boy act while he wasn't in control of his senses would have been even more foolish. The fireball hit the place where Allen had been not even a second ago, but the explosion injured Kanda on his arm and face, and he flinched at the pain, holding Allen tightly against him.

He had to finish the fight very quickly, but it was more than difficult for him to focus on both taking Road down and protecting Allen. It was at that moment that he felt the boy stir in his arms and he grunted but didn't have much more time to think any further as a new attack was launched on him. Kanda cursed out loud while dodging the blast.

"You will never be able to beat me like that!" Road roared in satisfaction and laughed again. "Come on, don't disappoint me! You can do better than that, so entertain me a bit before I rip off your head!"

"As if you could!" Kanda replied angrily.

"Kan...da..." a voice spoke out timidly. Great, the damn kid had awoken.

"Moyashi, I'm putting you down but stay away from here!" Kanda ordered Allen who was progressively coming back to his senses. As Kanda bent down slightly to drop his master, he felt a new surge of energy coming from Road, indicating that a new blow was going to come. This time, it wasn't a mere fireball that came out from the salamander's mouth, but a long trail of blinding flames heading to them in a large whirlpool of incandescence.

It was too late to dodge this one, and for a second, Kanda's heart stopped and he prepared for the incoming blow... which never come.

Their surroundings shook violently as the powerful flames hit against a huge barrier. Allen's barrier. In such a short amount of time, the boy had managed to react quickly enough to erect a defensive shield, strong enough to resist Road's flames. When Kanda glanced at the young Exorcist, the latter had a few strands of golden hair mingling with the silver ones, but not as many as before.

"Kanda, you're an idiot." Allen said while focusing on keeping his barrier on. "Let me finish her off and be done with it. I've come here for a reason, and I don't like being delayed." he said very seriously.

Kanda gritted his teeth. He hated that insolence, he hated it enough to want to strangle Allen and yet, at the same time he couldn't help but feel _attracted_ to Allen's energy which was now clearly bearing his demonic imprint.

"Shut up." he said dryly. "You don't even know what you're here for."

"But I plan to find it out very soon. Right after I'm done with the youkai over there." Allen replied with a faint smirk.

"Allen Walker! I'll shut that mouth of yours for good!" Road shouted to remind them of her presence.

"You can't kill me. Your Earl didn't allow you to." the Exorcist retorted.

"I don't care!" Road raged furiously. "You're our enemy! The Earl would have killed you at some point anyway! It won't change anything if you die now!"

Out of anger, Road sank her claws in the ground heavily, cracking the soil under her.

"I'll burn both of you to cinders right here." she growled threateningly.

"Not if I kill you before." Allen said, and the next second, he dismissed his barrier and rushed to Road while performing a binding spell which wrapped itself around Road's mouth and prevented her from opening it.

Kanda quickly caught up to him, feeling Allen's spiritual energy growing again. He had to keep that energy under control at all cost before Allen did something stupid. Then he prepared Mugen and poured as much energy in the blade as he could, ready to slash Road's legs while Allen was keeping her under control. However, despite having her mouth tied, she could still move the rest of her body, including her long and powerful tail.

"Watch out!" Kanda shouted at Allen when he saw the tail cleaving the air towards the boy. The warning was barely enough for him to jump back but not enough to dodge the tail completely. The tip hit Allen head-on and he was sent flying a few steps back. A cry of pain escaped his lips. The ties around Road's mouth started loosening, yet Allen came back to his senses quickly enough to tighten them again.

"Annoying youkai!" he muttered, trying to release more of his own energy without being able to. "Kanda! Stop hindering me!"

"Certainly not." was Kanda's mere answer. Without paying any further attention to Allen, he rushed at Road and sank his blade deeply in one of the scaled legs of the back, and pulled on the side to sever the limb. Black blood spilled out abundantly from the gaping wound, and a loud and terrible howl of pain filled the area, loud and terrible enough for Allen to wince and cover his ears in a futile attempt at deafening the sound. He could only thank the fact that Road's mouth was still forced shut.

The salamander collapsed on the floor and its form started shrinking as its features progressively turned back to those of a human girl. Her body was seized by violent spasms and where once lay a left leg could only be seen a pool black liquid bathing the fabric of the kimono. She was panting and sweating, unable to get air in her lungs and desperately trying to muffle her moans of pain by biting on her sleeve.

Kanda walked to her, glaring icily at her while Allen looked obviously satisfied.

"Do you want to deal the final blow, or shall I?" he asked his shikigami.

"I will. Just erect your inner barriers again." Kanda replied dryly.

"You're in no position to order me anything, Kanda." Allen said dryly. "I'm not stupid enough to use my curse if the battle is over."

As he pronounced those words, Allen's energy slowly receded, turning his appearance back to normal. The boy sat down on the ground, visibly drained by the previous effort, and watched as Kanda held his blade right above Road's throat.

"Any last words?" he asked, smirking.

"D-damn you... Kan...da... ahh... don't think...ahh...that you'll beat...ahh...the E-"

Her last words were drowned into her own blood as a slashing sound was heard. Allen looked away, not particularly bearing such a sight, and buried his face in his hands.

"Gods... I can't believe we made it..." he murmured.

"Che, and which outcome did you expect? There's no way I could have lost against her." Kanda snapped.

As Allen raised his eyes again, he noticed that the corpse had vanished exactly like the dead shikigami. Standing up slowly, he dusted off his robe and sighed.

"Let's move forward. I can feel something calling me. I hope you're not too beaten up." he said. Kanda was injured in several places, but Allen couldn't tell whether he was bleeding a lot or not because of his pitch black kimono. The youkai was panting slightly, and Allen knew he'd never admit he was exhausted. Kanda didn't move or reply immediately. It was only after a few seconds that he spoke again:

"Moyashi."

"Yes?"

"Next time you lift your barriers, I'll make sure you won't be able to wake up before long."

"I should be the one complaining." Allen retorted sullenly. "You knocked me out in the middle of a battle. What if I had been killed?"

"I wouldn't have let that happen." Kanda replied, even if he knew that they had avoided a catastrophe by a hair's breadth.

"My point is, you've been complaining that I can't fight properly and now that I can, you try to prevent me from doing so. Just make up your mind already." Allen sighed again. "Damn, this is tiring. I'll have to be careful in future."

"I don't call that 'fight properly'. You can't even control yourself in that state, and I have to waste effort on you to keep you sane. It's annoying."

"I don't see where the problem is, as long as I can destroy the youkai, I don't have to control myself. The quicker I'm done with all this mess, the better. But I agree it could lead to some unwanted casualties someday. Therefore I order you this: whenever I release my energy, I want you to help me control it just enough for me not to turn into a savage beast."

"Che, brat." Kanda merely shrugged.

The two of them resumed walking.

* * *

_Story coming to an end in a few chapters, but I guess some of you already have noticed it. Unbeta-ed. Thanks for all the support you give me!_


	26. Towards the end

**Chapter 26 - Towards the end  
**

Allen kept walking forward, not really knowing where he was heading to while at the same time not seeming lost either. It was a strange feeling; as if he was guided by some invisible strings pulling him towards his destination, towards his goal.

Kanda was walking by his side, silently, without showing any sign of impatience though he kept glancing at the boy from time to time. His wounds were healing slowly due to Road's demonic powers interfering with his healing powers; but at least he wasn't losing his blood like a fountain.

"Kanda? What's this?" Allen suddenly asked as he stopped walking.

The demon looked in front of him, where Allen was pointing to and cocked an eyebrow. At their feet, no ground could be seen anymore. Instead there was a huge and deep crevice; Allen bent forward a bit but the bottom couldn't be seen.

"It's obviously a crevice." Kanda replied sarcastically.

"Thank you for your help." Allen sighed. "I need to go inside."

If Allen expected Kanda to stare at him then tell him that he was completely insane, then he was deeply disappointed for the demon merely shrugged.

"Then go."

"Hmm… You aren't worried that I could kill myself?" Allen asked.

"This is the world of demons. It doesn't work like the human world. If you feel you have to jump in, then do. I'll follow you anyway."

Now Allen hesitated. It was true that this world had nothing to do with his own, but to think that jumping in precipice would do him no harm was beyond his imagination. And yet, he was irresistibly attracted to that huge void spreading at his feet waiting to devour him and make him disappear in the depths of darkness.

"How long do you plan to stand here?" Kanda asked, now slightly impatient.

"I- uh, well… it doesn't seem very natural to jump in there you know." Allen replied.

"You're a wimp, that's all."

"Well excuse me for being a wimp! Wasn't it you who told me I need to have some sense of survival instinct?" the Exorcist snapped back.

"You just don't know when to use it."

Allen let out an exasperated noise.

"Instinct is, as its name states, _instinctive_. Therefore I can't really control it!" he said.

"You're annoying. Let's go." Kanda scooped Allen up swiftly before the latter even had time to protest and jumped.

* * *

Lulubell let out a loud, piercing scream that echoed again and again against the walls of the mountain.

It hurt. A lot.

The last time she had felt the same pain was thousands of years ago, when… when they had lost one of theirs. The female demon was now panting hard, sweating and wincing as the pain receded very slowly but still making her body tremble in spasms.

"Lulubell!" Tyki came in as quickly as his state allowed him to. "What is it? What happened? Lulubell!"

He knelt by her side, wrapping his only arm around her to stop the spasms while speaking reassuring words to her.

"Calm down, calm down. What happened?" he asked again.

"Road… Road… she…"

"What about her? Do you know where she is?"

"You… didn't feel it? She… is no more."

Tyki froze, then frowned. Then gradually, he started feeling it too. He had been too exhausted because of his wounds to feel it, but now, he could sense it. He knew that Lulubell had always been the most sensitive of them; and whenever one of their kin disappeared, she was always the first one to notice it.

"You can't be serious… at a time like this…" Tyki murmured. "When, and who did…?"

But Lulubell wasn't in a state to reply and the other demon didn't insist.

"The Earl must have probably sensed it by now. I should go see him. Rest here, Lulubell."

* * *

"Road… is no more, is she?" the Earl spoke slowly, his back facing Tyki before the latter could even say a word. He remained silent, knowing that the Earl wasn't expecting a reply anyway.

"This isn't good… This isn't good at all. And with Cross Marian here, I can't afford to lose focus. The Source's corruption must be maintained at all cost, and our main objective for now is to get rid of that sneaky man."

He turned round, facing Tyki, and despite the large, usual grin he had on his face, two shiny trails could be seen on his cheeks.

"Call the twins. It's time for them to wake up." the Earl ordered.

* * *

Tyki stepped into the barely lit room with a sigh, a bundle of clothes in his one arm. He didn't really dislike the twins, but they could be very… noisy and annoying. But now wasn't the time to dwell over such details. There was a huge pool in the middle of the room, filled with a slightly green and luminous liquid; and in the middle of the pool, two silhouettes could be seen resting in fetal position, chained to each other with numerous seals that seemed to float underwater.

Tyki put down the clothes and plunged his arms into the pool, then he grabbed the string of seals and pull it out abruptly, breaking it. The seals vanished immediately and the light coming from the water started reducing until the whole room was nothing but darkness.

It didn't last long though, as the liquid started glowing again, but this time with a white shade, and when Tyki looked again, he saw the two forms resting in the pool begin to stir. They unfolded their limbs and slowly emerged to the surface before opening their eyes. For twins, they had nothing in common physically, yet the eerie grin that appeared on their faces was identical.

No one talked during a few seconds, until one of them finally spoke:

"How long?" he asked with a hoarse voice.

"Over a century." Tyki replied.

"Only? I thought the Earl would let us sleep a bit more."

"Get some clothes on. The Earl wants to see you."

"We're not stupid. Of course he wants to see us, otherwise you wouldn't have broken our seals, right?"

"Look, look, his arm's gone." the second twin suddenly said, pointing to Tyki.

"Yeah, indeed. How did you manage to do that, Tyki?" the first one asked with a hint of mockery in his tone.

"Let's skip the details, shall we? The Earl is waiting." Tyki replied with a sigh.

* * *

When Allen opened his eyes, he was in a forest. _Again_. He was getting tired of forests, seriously. Then he remembered that he wasn't supposed to be in a forest. He quickly turned his head to look for Kanda and saw the latter walking beside him as if everything was normal. Wait, so he was walking? Since when? He was certain that Kanda had jumped and… and now they were walking in a forest?

"Hm, Kanda…"

"What?" came the dry reply.

"Where are we?"

"As if I'd know. I've been following you since we get there."

"What? I mean, we did jump into that crevice, didn't we? Then how come…"

"How many times do I need to tell you this world can't be compared to yours?" Kanda said, annoyed.

"I know that, but… it's still surprising."

"But since you woke up, we should be near whatever goal you're trying to reach."

"Woke up?"

Allen didn't have time to add much more as a strong gust of wind whipped his face and made him protect his face with his arm. A voice was heard:

"_You've finally come._"

Allen slowly lowered his arm and saw… nothing. Instead of the trees and grass, there was now merely a plain ground of rock, and a single altar was erected in the middle of the scene. And around the altar, under Allen's stunned eyes, seven – no, eight silhouettes were floating, all looking like ancient Exorcists and all gazing at him. Spirits? Probably.

"You must be kidding me…" Kanda's voice made Allen jump. The demon was staring at the eight spirits with a mix of annoyance and disbelief in his eyes.

"_Why, hello Kanda._" One of the spirits greeted. "_Pleased to see you again._"

"Hm, you know them?" Allen asked, but Kanda didn't reply. Allen didn't need it, though. As he looked a bit more carefully, he recognized one of them. It was the blonde Exorcist he had seen in one of his dreams. And then it clicked. "They're your former masters!"

The growl Kanda emitted was enough to confirm Allen's guess.

"_And welcome to you, young Exorcist. Do you know why you were summoned here?_"

Allen was intimidated at first, and gulped before shaking his head. He could barely believe that in front of him were standing his ancestors, those whom Kanda had served as part of his curse.

"_You're here so we can give you back your ability to fight._"

"My… ability to fight? What do you mean?"

"_In your current state, you are unable to beat the Earl. At best, you'll get killed._"

At best? Allen wondered if it'd be wise to ask what the worst would be, but he refrained from asking the question.

"_Part of your memory was stolen, and you can't control the curse I put on my lineage._" It was the blonde Exorcist who was speaking. "_You cannot fight in your current state._"

Allen kept silent. He didn't even know if his ancestors were expecting any answer from him, but since he didn't know what to say, he chose silence.

"_The altar you see here is the place where all eight of us have poured all our powers after our deaths. We want you to be the container of those powers._"

The silver-haired boy blinked once, then articulated with some trouble:

"You… what?"

"_It is our legacy we left here, and in order to beat the Earl, you'll need the legacy of our whole lineage. You are the last one, therefore you have to do it with your shikigami's help. This is the last chance to use Kanda's powers to erase the Earl from this world._"

"Don't talk of me as if I wasn't here." Kanda snapped, which actually made the eighth Exorcist chuckle.

"_Sorry, sorry. But it's strange to see how much the young boy here triggered so much change in you. You weren't that cooperative with me._"

"_Neither were you with me._" Another spirit added.

"_Same here._" Another one said.

The other spirits also nodded their heads or shrugged, to Kanda's utmost annoyance.

"Get to the point already!" he interrupted them.

"Kanda, you shouldn't talk to your masters like that." Allen said with faint amusement, earning a glare from his shikigami.

"_Allen, as we are talking right now, the whole Order has engaged battle against the Earl. They will stand but not eternally. And with their actual powers, they won't be able to defeat him. That is why we have decided to send you as our asset. You will become the receptacle of the power of eight generations of Exorcists, and combine it with that of your shikigami to destroy the Earl._"

"I-I'm not sure I understand what you mean…" Allen replied hesitantly. "You're going to put all your powers in me so I can kill the Early?"

"_Exactly._"

"But how can I handle such power? I can barely control mine whenever I feel one of the Earl's demons near, so…"

"_We are not giving you choice. Your only goal now should be to defeat the source of evil, namely the Early. No matter how._"

"So you actually plan to have him go berserk and wipe out everything he can." Kanda interrupted the spirit abruptly.

"Wha-"

"_It's only up to Allen to go berserk or not. Besides, it seems you have the ability to keep him under control, Kanda._"

"Che, I'm not going to babysit him during every battle."

"_In that case, he'll destroy everything, including the Earl and the war will be over._"

"Wait, wait!" Allen intervened. "I can't agree with something like that! I don't want a power which would make me destroy everything, foe or not!"

"_We are not giving you choice._"

"But-"

"Hey, it's going to kill him!" Kanda shouted suddenly. "Because of the damn curse you put on him, he has to use his own life force to unleash his powers! You're going to kill him by making him absorb too much power!"

Allen looked panicked at Kanda's words then looked at his ancestors. The latter remained impassive, not agreeing but not denying them either.

"You-You're kidding, right?" the boy asked, turning pale.

"_Enough. Let's proceed._"

Before Allen had time to add another word, the eight spirits suddenly vanished into the altar; a dazzling light came out from the latter, forcing Allen to shut his eyes. Out of reflex, he held out his hand to grip Kanda's kimono and relief seized him when he felt an arm around his waist, holding him tight.

And then, his consciousness started fading, as if something or someone was trying to pull it out from his body; he resisted while gripping tighter at Kanda. There were voices echoing in his head, numerous voices uttering hundreds and hundreds of spells and incantations; the words were mixing and sounded like an unbearable symphony to his ears, threatening to make his skull burst. He wanted to scream at the voices to stop, to shut up and leave him alone and yet no sound could come out of his mouth for some reason.

His whole body was now wrapped in the same blinding light than the altar and Allen still had his eyes shut. Somehow, despite his attention being all focused on the insane headache that was appearing, he still managed to feel Kanda close to him; and the demon was probably telling him something, but Allen couldn't hear. The only thing Allen could hear were the countless formulas being crammed in his mind at an amazing speed, and he felt like a passive container swallowing every piece of knowledge that was given to him without complaining – without being able to complain.

It wasn't particularly painful, save for the impression of headache he was having, but it wasn't particularly pleasant either. The sensation was very weird, as never before had he been forced to store up such an amount of knowledge; and while he knew perfectly well that the said knowledge wasn't his, it felt as if he had practiced all the spells before.

It kept entering him, more and more, a profusion of formulas and chants, an effervescence of sacred words swirling in his mind. Then, like something very faint and distant, he heard a familiar voice.

"…barriers!..."

_What? Who… Kanda?_

"…your barriers, damn it!..."

_My… barriers?_

"Erect your damn barriers, Moyashi!"

He obeyed immediately, not even trying to wonder about when he had let them down.

And suddenly there was silence.

Not for long though, as very confuse noises started echoing in his head again, but they were muffled by something.

"_Do not resist. Your barriers won't stand long against us, Allen._"

"I'll kill you if you lower them, Moyashi!" Kanda retorted.

"_Why, Kanda? Why? You long for such power as well. The more powerful your master is, the more you'll desire him. You demons only yearn after power, after all._"

"Shut up!" Kanda yelled while still holding Allen closely.

Half-conscious, Allen was listening like a mere spectator. His ancestors were right. Why would Kanda refuse to let Allen get all their powers after calling him 'weak' so many times? Was it because he would die afterwards? But then again, Allen didn't care much at that point. Truth be told, he was getting more and more attracted to all the knowledge that had already filled him and he wanted more.

_More._

"Moyashi, don't you dare!..."

"_Lift your barriers, Allen._"

"Don't listen to them!"

_Why? I want more. You want more too, obviously._

"Enough!" Kanda raged. "If you want power so much, then use mine! I shared my energy with you, isn't that enough for you?"

…_Kanda's energy?_

Gradually, Allen felt Kanda's spiritual energy stir in him, awakening hundreds of different emotions that made him thrill. Yes, Allen remembered the first time he had met Kanda and the irresistible attraction he had felt for him – for his powers.

"_Don't interfere, Kanda._"

"No." It was Allen's voice.

"_What?_"

"No." Allen repeated more firmly.

"_We will finish the process, with or without your agreement. It is for the world's sake._"

Allen felt his barriers being attacked restlessly and tried thinking quickly about a means to stop all that mess but couldn't find any.

"_It is your duty as an Exorcist to do whatever you can to destroy evil._"

Kanda's energy was filling his veins, making his blood boil with a new rage.

"_It is no use resisting._"

Allen's whole body awakened under the excitation of Kanda's energy. His shikigami was right, he didn't need more. He wasn't able to handle more. Kanda was enough.

"_You fool. We are giving you a chance to rid the world of evil. Submit._"

"NO!" Allen shouted.

* * *

"That's Mount Shiomi in front of us." Tiedoll commented as night was falling on the landscape. "I regret that Cross didn't wait for us."

"He's not the kind of man who likes working with a team." Nine shrugged. "But I agree with you; it's not safe to hang around here with scattered forces. I worry about the kids, fear is written all over their faces. They should have remained at the capital." she added with a lower voice.

The 'kids' were actually young students at the temple who had just gotten their title of Exorcist. They were three of them and they were following Tiedoll and Nine without saying a word. Tiedoll remained silent too but deep inside, both he and Nine knew their chances of surviving were more than low.

They were now at the foot of the mountain and there was still no sign of any youkai around though the Exorcists could clearly feel the gloomy atmosphere surrounding them and sapping the younger recruits' morale which hadn't been particularly high to begin with. All of them had their shikigami summoned and the latter kept glancing around them in case of a surprise attack.

The tension increased at each of their steps, and every noise which was louder than the average made them jump.

"Cool down or you'll get killed before you know it." Nine said.

"That wasn't the best thing to tell them." Tiedoll replied.

"I'm only telling the truth." the woman shrugged. "Trust in your skills a bit more instead of being afraid of something that isn't here yet."

Suddenly, Nine's baboon growled, perched on its master's shoulder and baring its fangs. At the same time, she felt one – no, two demonic energies in front of her. Tiedoll obviously felt them too as he was looking in the same direction as her.

"Show yourself." she ordered.

Nothing happened at first, then out of nowhere, a swarm of pitch black moths appeared like a miniature tornado before dispatching everywhere around the five Exorcists. And now in front of them were standing two youkai: a female and a male one. The male had an arm missing.

"Good evening, Exorcists, and welcome on the sacred soil of Mount Shiomi." The male youkai said.

* * *

Cross cursed as he failed at breaking down the invisible barrier once again. He was in the middle of a small plain on the side of the mountain, pacing back and forth. He had hoped that his hypothesis about Kanda being the only one able to break it would be wrong, but it seemed that wasn't the case; and since the demon had vanished somewhere, it was putting the red-haired Exorcist in an even grumpier mood.

"Maria, can't you really do anything?" he asked his gorgeous-looking shikigami. The latter slowly turned her head to him and replied with her most gracious voice:

"I am unable to break a barrier of such level without destroying half the mountain with it."

"It shouldn't be a problem…" Cross muttered before adding quickly: "I know, I know, it's a sacred mountain and it must remain intact." His face darkened: "I wonder how much of it will remain intact in a few hours, though…"

"Something is coming." Maria warned.

And indeed, soon after, a sinister laugh rose in the dark night.

"So you are Cross Marian, the thorn in the Earl's foot." Someone snickered.

"Yes, yes, that's him!" Another one replied.

"Shut up, Jas', I didn't ask you."

Two silhouettes loomed out of the darkness and through the dim moonlight, Cross managed to catch a glimpse of their faces. One of them looked like a failed and broken doll, with long and blonde hair framing a dark-skinned face, while the other one looked more handsome though the black marks under his eyes were giving him a rather creepy look.

"He doesn't look particularly dangerous." the latter pondered. "I wonder why the Earl woke us up for a guy like this one. It should be settled within a minute."

"Yes, yes, within a minute! Deb', can I have the shikigami?"

"Why not? I'll take care of the Exorcist." the said Deb' replied.

"Hey hey, who the fuck are you and who do you think you're talking to?" Cross asked, now seriously pissed.

"I'm Jasdevi, and he's Debitto! We're the twins! And you're Cross Marian, the one we have to kill!" the blonde youkai replied happily.

"I don't think he was actually expecting a real answer, Jas'…" Debitto sighed. "Anyway, let's finish the job here. Tyki and Lulu have already engaged battle with the other insects which have come here; I'd be pissed if they were to be done before us."

The youkai had barely finished talking before a large, luminous circle appeared on the ground under his feet, encircling both of them. The next second, there was a huge explosion which covered the spot with thick smoke.

"If you stopped talking…" Cross said with a smirk. He knew that his spell had missed the two youkai. He couldn't afford underestimating them; it was the first time he heard of the Earl's twins and he had no idea how strong they were.

"It isn't very polite to interrupt us!" Debitto yelled as he walked out of the wall of smoke, followed by his twin.

"Maria, let's finish this quickly." Cross told his shikigami.

"That's our line!" Debitto snapped, furious.

His palm started glowing with a blue light, then the next second, a small and blue sphere was resting in the palm.

"Eat this!" Debitto shouted, throwing the sphere at Cross. The latter jumped back quickly and as soon as the sphere touched the ground, it exploded into large spikes of ice.

"Hey, hey, what the hell is this?" Cross asked, touching the ice with the tip of his finger.

"We call that a 'bomb', Cross." Debitto replied with a smirk, and without wasting another second, several other blue spheres appeared in his hand. "Don't think you'll be able to dodge all of them, you bastard!"

He threw them all at the Exorcist who shouted: "Maria!"

The next second, several explosions were heard as numerous iced peaks bloomed from the ground. But Cross was nowhere to be seen. The twins cursed.

"Where the hell is he…?" Debitto muttered, scanning the area.

"He's playing hide-and-seek." Jasdero added.

"Tch, annoying man. We'll find you, don't worry about that."

"We could blow everything up, Deb'." Jasdero suggested. The latter cocked an eyebrow.

"Hmm? Oh, good idea. Yeah, let's burn this place."

The twins' hands started glowing with a red light this time, creating small spheres of the same colour. The sick grin on Debitto's face widened as he added: "Tonight we shall have a roasted Exorcist in our menu."

"Deb'! I-I can't move!" Jasdero suddenly interrupted him. His twin turned round and indeed, he saw his brother struggling against invisible chains which were preventing him from making any abrupt gesture.

"What the-"

"Don't underestimate me, you low youkai." Cross' voice rose next to them. A second later, the man was right in front of them, and was pointing a strange golden item at them.

"This is called a 'gun', and it can do very severe damage on youkai like you." Cross said, smirking. Behind him was his shikigami, her feet a few inches from the ground and the many layers of her dress floating majestically under a non-existent wind, giving the impression that she had grown large, black wings.

"How did you call us?" Debitto asked with a threatening voice.

"Low youkai. Because that's what you are." Cross replied very casually.

"We'll make you swallow back your words."

The moment Cross pulled the trigger, the two demons vanished instantly from his sight with a faint smirk. There was a bang, but the bullet didn't hit any target. At the same time, he felt the binding spell he had cast on Jasdero breaking.

"You're not the only one who can turn invisible, Cross Marian." Debitto's voice echoed somewhere around. "And now the real fun will start."

* * *

As planned, the three young recruits didn't last long and their corpses were now lying on the ground. Their shikigami had also been killed and the only remaining Exorcists were Tiedoll and Nine, along with their shikigami.

"The male youkai is weakened by the injury on his arm." Nine had noticed; therefore the Exorcists were focusing their attacks on Tyki while still being careful about the other youkai which wasn't less formidable.

"There should be a way to get rid of those moths!" Nine exclaimed, panting from their efforts at avoiding the night butterflies' attacks. No matter how many of them she destroyed, they kept coming back from nowhere.

"The only way is to kill the one who controls them!" Tiedoll replied, also starting to get tired.

Nine let out a sound of annoyance.

"Lau! Any idea?" But as she glanced at her shikigami, she saw the baboon youkai act strangely, as if it was struggling against something. "Lau! What's the matter?"

"I-This mountain is... wrong..."

"Wrong? What do you mean?"

"Don't get distracted, woman." Tyki intervened as he charged on her with his star-shaped blade. The female Exorcist dodged the attack by a hair's width, cursing at herself.

"Lau!"

"I am... losing control..." Lau articulated with difficulty; the shikigami's body was trembling under the effort of controlling itself. A swarm of moths flew to Lau, ready to devour him.

"Move back!" Nine raged, casting a fire spell on them. "Lau, are you ok?"

"I told you not to get distracted." Tyki warned her again as he was about to plunge his hand into her chest. However, ropes of light appearing from the ground stopped him.

"Please do not forget about me." Tiedoll said calmly.

"The same to you." Lulubell's voice was the only warning he had before a column of water surrounded him and fell on him.

Meanwhile, Nine had used that single second as an opportunity to rush to her shikigami which looked visibly in pain.

"Lau! Tell me what's wrong!"

"Move... away... I'm losing... control..."

"No! You have to resist! You-"

"The place is... filled with a power that... is making me..."

"This place is? Then we're retreating immediately!" Nine turned to Tiedoll to see him under a barrier trying to prevent the water from coming inside. As she looked more closely, she noticed that it wasn't really water, but the body of the female youkai which had transformed into something fluid and transparent. She gritted her teeth.

"Cloud... kill me before I... try to... harm you..."

"Don't speak nonsense! We need to fall back! If this place is what is making shikigami go berserk, then we need to move away from it!"

"...Too late... Kill me... I'm going to die... anyway... I'd rather die by your hand than... die because I... hurt you..."

"No! We're retreating! Tiedoll! We're-"

"Cloud... behind you!" Lau shrieked. But the Exorcist wasn't quick enough to turn back and a second after, she gasped in pain as air failed to enter her lungs.

"Now, what shall I smash first? Your lungs?" Tyki said with a creepy voice. "Or..." he lowered his arm which was plunged in Nine's back to mid-arm. "Maybe your stomach?" He squeezed the organ a bit, and Nine let out a piercing scream before coughing blood.

"Cloud..." Lau was clawing the ground, still trying to prevent madness from taking over him and eyes filled with helplessness as his mistress was getting killed in front of him.

"The stomach it is then."

Nine's scream was muffled by her own blood as she choked on it, her face getting paler and paler.

"Next will be your lungs."

Lau shrieked with a strident voice and bared his fangs, his last remains of control snapping. He jumped on Tyki and grabbed the youkai's throat, making him fall backwards and releasing Nine at the same time. The woman fell on the ground, her body convulsed in pain. When she turned her face to have a look behind her, her eyes widened as she saw her shikigami vanishing to dust around Tyki's arm.

"No..." she barely managed to whisper. The last thing she saw before passing out was Tyki walking to her, then a swirl of flames veiling her vision.

* * *

"Those youkai are annoying." Cross muttered, panting a bit. He couldn't see them, but he could feel the faint traces of their energies they were trying to conceal.

"We return the compliment, Cross." Debitto's voice echoed again. "You're an annoying ant trying desperately to survive, but you don't understand that the Earl's power is beyond your imagination."

"Yeah, call him here and let us talk, we'll see about that." Cross sneered.

"Insolent human! You'll stop acting so high very soon."

"Cross, on your left." Maria warned.

"I know."

The blow came right after, hitting against Cross' barrier.

"Damn it, I don't have time to fight against you, I need to find the Earl." the Exorcist growled while resisting the shock. "And where's the damn useless kid and his shikigami?"

"They haven't come back." Maria replied.

"This is getting on my nerves. Let's get serious, Maria."

"Understood-Wait, I feel something coming..."

"Something?"

The shikigami remained silent, her head facing in the distance.

"Hey, I can't hold my barriers eternally. Conceal me, will you?" Cross interrupted her gazing.

"They've returned."

"What?"

"They've returned from the world of demons and are heading for this place. No, actually they're already here."

"The brat and his shikigami?"

"Yes." Maria merely replied as she wrapped both of them under a veil of her energy, concealing them from the sight of their enemies.

"Then let's clear off the field for them. It is time for you to sing, my beautiful shikigami."

* * *

The mess of energies emanating from the mount made Kanda sick. He glanced on the side at Allen who was standing next to him and watching as the lights of battles were illuminating the sides of the mount. The boy's hair was streaked with golden but his pupils were as silver as ever and the determined look in them could almost make most people forget he was still only a child.

"Let's finish this." he said calmly.

Kanda didn't reply.

"Oh, and Kanda..."

The demon raised an eyebrow.

"Thank you."

Kanda shrugged.

xxxxxxxx

* * *

_I can't believe I've finally managed to finish the damn chapter lol. I don't even know if there are still readers who follow that fic... oh well... If there are, thank you for being so patient with me!_


	27. Morning

**Chapter 27 - Morning  
**

"_Brother, let us go fight." Lenalee requested again. It had been days since she had been asking Komui to send both her and Lavi to Mount Shiomi._

"_I can't, you're in no state for that, and you know it." Komui replied to the two young Exorcists standing in front of him._

"_We are! And we can't possibly stay here while the others are outside and risking their lives to save the city!" Lenalee retorted._

"_It's as Lenalee said, Komui. We wouldn't be able to forgive ourselves if something bad happens to the others and we are not around to help them." Lavi added._

"_Lavi, your wounds aren't even fully closed, and Lenalee, you..." Komui paused, not knowing if telling her she was still mentally unstable was the right thing to do. He didn't have to though, as the girl spoke for him:_

"_I know what you're thinking, but right now saving whatever we can is more important than my personal feelings. I... have lost a dear friend, but for his sake I'll fight against the Earl and eliminate him so no more shikigami will disappear tragically." she said with conviction, though there was a faint tremor in her voice when she mentioned the loss of her shikigami._

"_Please, Komui, let us go." Lavi insisted._

"_You'll go anyway, even if I tell you not to." Komui sighed._

"_Yes."_

"_Then go. I disapprove but I can't stop you." the older man gave up._

"_Thank you, brother!" Lenalee's face lit up._

"_Thanks, Komui!"_

_As the two Exorcists exited the room, Komui added:_

"_May you come back safely."_

They barely arrived on time to see Cloud Nine in a very delicate situation. Not too far away, they also spotted Tiedoll fighting against Lulubell. Lavi sent out his shikigami; the latter sent out a massive fireball towards the enemy while Lavi rushed towards nine as she passed out and fell completely on the ground. He didn't have any trouble recognizing Tyki, and a surge of hatred set his whole body on fire, making his blood boil. It was time to settle the fight definitely.

"Lenalee!" he shouted to the girl who had stayed a bit farther behind. "Don't let that guy approach you and don't let the moths touch you!"

"I know!" she replied as she started summoning a new shikigami, but at that moment, Tiedoll's voice rose:

"Don't summon anything! Lavi, call back your shikigami too! They won't last long in this area and they'll start attacking you!"

Lenalee gulped and nodded, focusing again on Tyki who had escaped the flames. Lavi complied too then knelt down next to Nine. He bit his lip; her heart was still beating but she needed emergency treatment, however, he couldn't possibly leave the battlefield and leave Lenalee and Tiedoll fight alone.

Tyki had seemed to read his mind because he glanced at the redhead and smirked:

"Don't worry, boy. After I kill the girl, it'll be your turn. Don't be in such a hurry. And let me tell you something else: sooner or later, your shikigami will go berserk, summoned or not. It'll just take a little longer if they aren't."

"As if it's gonna happen!" Lavi spat back, standing up and preparing to fight. Nine was probably going to die anyway, and he didn't need to add his own death to hers. "Come, I'll take you on!"

"_We_ will take you on!" Lenalee corrected as she started an incantation. "Let's go, Lavi!"

As soon as the battle started, Lenalee cast aside all her mourning for her shikigami, determined to bring an end to whatever caused the youkai to wreak havoc. Not able to use their shikigami, the two Exorcists focused on their spells and incantations to attack the demon restlessly.

On his side, Tiedoll was having some trouble dealing with the shape-changing youkai; Lulubell would use her transformations to fly away from a ground-spell or on the contrary, crawl down to avoid an aerial attack. This was getting tiring.

"Will you stop playing cat and mouse already?" he asked, slightly annoyed.

"Cat and mouse, you say?" Lulubell replied. "But who's the cat, I wonder."

"You give me no choice." the old man replied. "Ditu!" he called, and immediately, an enormous spirit of light appeared; it had a human shape yet was tall enough to reach the sky, and its whole body was glowing with a dim, pale green light. It knelt down and lowered its head to Tiedoll's level.

"Ha! You're going to risk having this shikigami turn against you?" Lulubell sneered. "Too bad for you, I know that type of youkai, they specialize in defence and it's almost useless in attack! Did you lose your mind, old man?"

Tiedoll ignored her and addressed his shikigami:

"We don't have time to waste. The more you stay out here, the more dangerous it is for you. I need you to finish this quickly. You know what to do."

The huge shikigami nodded his head slowly then asked with a deep voice that resonated through the entire area:

"And you know it will use up most of your energy, don't you?"

"Yes, it's fine as long as you destroy this youkai."

"Don't lose focus, Exorcist!" Lulubell yelled as she jumped at Tiedoll, a long dagger in her hand, but the huge shikigami barely slapped her away with the back of its hand. The demon changed into a crow to avoid crashing on the ground then turned back into her usual form.

"I'll kill this shikigami you seem so proud of then I'll deal with you!" she let out furiously.

"Kill her, Ditu."

"Don't joke! Those youkai can't attack!"

The shikigami closed its eyes and concentrated. Right behind, Tiedoll got ready to have his spiritual energy sucked up by his shikigami. The latter started draining him quickly, and the more energy he absorbed, the brighter he was becoming.

Meanwhile, Lavi and Lenalee hadn't stopped their attacks on Tyki and were now bearing scratches and marks that were soon to become bruises. They noticed Tiedoll summoning the huge shikigami but didn't have time to get distracted.

Ditu could easily repel Lulubell while absorbing more and more energy, until he finally said:

"I'm done."

But Tiedoll had already a knee on the ground, breathing heavily under the sudden exhaustion, and barely paid attention.

"You say I can't attack, filthy youkai? Then let me tell you something: my master taught me only one attack. Just one. But powerful enough to wipe out any youkai I want, in exchange for my master's spiritual energy."

Lulubell was raging and jumped in the air one more time in an attempt at taking down the immense shikigami. At that moment, a large halo of light wrapped around her, dazzling her completely and concealing her from the others' eyes. She screamed as the blessed light touched her then screamed even louder when hundreds of long spears of light appeared from nowhere and plunged in the large ball of light, piercing her body which was soon consumed to nothing.

A second later, everything had turned back to normal. Though the two young Exorcists were busy resisting against Tyki, none of them had missed what had happened and Tyki let out a loud 'NO!' before gritting his teeth out of anger. The deep voice of Ditu echoed once more:

"I cannot stay here any longer without putting everyone in danger. Protect my master."

And then the shikigami disappeared, leaving a completely drained Tiedoll.

"It seems like only the young ones remain." Tyki said coldly as an evil smirk graced his lips. "I'll make all of you pay for Road and Lulu's death. Be sure of that."

"Damn it! That guy has one arm missing, we should be able to take him down easily!" Lavi swore.

"Lavi! Tiedoll is...!"

"Focus here, Lenalee! Let the old man do whatever he wants!" the redhead shouted, then added: "Damn, our attacks aren't powerful enough to hurt him seriously, and he can break any bond I put on him to immobilize him!"

Lenalee was thinking very quickly to try and find a solution to end the fight. They were getting more and more exhausted and wouldn't be able to win in a battle of endurance. _'Think, think, think!'_

And then she found. She'd do as Tiedoll did, with the difference that she'd do it without a shikigami. She wasn't sure it was going to work, but she had to try.

"Lavi! Can you buy me time?" she asked, dodging one of Tyki's attacks.

"Sure but what for?"

"I'm gonna use all my energy to cast a powerful spell on him!"

"You what? That's crazy!"

"You'd better listen to the boy. It sure is crazy." Tyki added with a mad grin.

"Don't mid him, Lavi! Protect me while I'm casting!"

The latter nodded and stood between Tyki and her, casting a huge shield over the two Exorcists. The shield would probably not stop the demon that long, but at least it'd stop the moths. He just hoped that Lenalee knew what she was doing. Tyki was coming closer and closer, repeating that any attempt was useless; Lavi was sweating a lot and was starting to get panicked inside. _'Hurry up, Lenalee, hurry up!'_

Behind him, the girl was still gathering her energy, and a slight aura was surrounding her. _'More'_ she thought, _'I need more energy. Come on! Take everything I have! Everything! To the last bit of my energy! It has to work!'_

Lavi's shield broke and the Exorcist cursed as Tyki held out a hand to him.

"Take that!" Lavi shouted as he sent a fireball to the demon which the latter dodged perfectly.

"It's too late, boy. Now die."

Lavi heard Lenalee start chanting. He needed to buy just a bit more time. He cast several layers of shields one after another, and Tyki broke them all though he was a bit annoyed.

"Stop playing that stupid game. Your barriers are worth nothing."

"Lavi, move out!"

At Lenalee's signal, Lavi jumped on the side. Just in time to avoid the powerful blast of energy hitting Tyki head-on. The latter let out a loud scream of pain and despair; all the moths were killed instantly. Lavi watched with wide eyes as the demon was burning at the contact of the energy and started turning into particles.

When the light faded, all that was left was a black trace on the ground, where it had burnt. It took Lavi several seconds to realize it was over; it was the sound of Lenalee dropping to the ground which brought him back to reality.

"Lenalee!" He rushed to her.

"I-I'm fine..." the girl said with a faint smile. "We need to... take care of... Tiedoll and... Nine..."

"Don't talk, just rest. Tiedoll should be OK, but Nine..."

"...must treat her... I need... sleep..."

"Rest, you deserved it. I'll see what I can do for Nine." Lavi said reassuringly.

The battle was far from over but they couldn't do much more for now. As Lavi pondered about what to do, he saw two silhouettes approaching with a familiar gait.

* * *

"I won't last much longer." Maria said suddenly.

"Tch, can't you hold a bit more? Those bastards are tougher than expected." Cross muttered, hidden by his shikigami's power.

"We are very close to the source of what is causing the disturbance. I've been exposed to that foul atmosphere more than what normal youkai should be able to handle." the female shikigami replied placidly.

"Right, right. Then we need to finish those guys off quickly. It seems the useless brat is taking his sweet time to come here."

"I shall retire for now. I need to get away from here, this is getting too disturbing."

"Hey hey! Wait!"

"They have come, therefore I shall leave." Maria replied calmly as she disappeared.

The next second, Cross heard sneers.

"So, your lovely shikigami abandoned you? How sad, we'll kill you now so you won't feel too desperate." One of the twins said.

Cross didn't have time to curse as he saw a blue bomb flying to him before exploding against the barrier erected right before the Exorcist. Cross was certain he hadn't had time to put a barrier, though.

"Che, useless people shouldn't be on battlefields." an arrogant voice was heard behind him. Cross twitched, then turned slowly to see – very unsurprisingly – Kanda looking at him with certain scorn and Allen right next to him, one hand held out to keep the barrier active. Cross cocked an eyebrow when he noticed the golden strands in the boy's hair but didn't get much more time to be surprised as Allen spoke:

"Lenalee, Tiedoll and Nine need treatment, especially Nine. Lavi is down there with them trying to do his best but he needs help. Would you go and help him bring them back to the temple?"

"Hey hey, is that a way to talk to me? Show some respect, brat."

"Your shikigami is down there too, you should go with her, Cross." Kanda added dryly. "You'll just be a hindrance here."

"Watch your tongue, y-"

"Stop ignoring us, you bunch of bastards!" Jasdero shouted on the other side of the barrier, visibly pissed off. His twin didn't look much cooler. They were banging unsuccessfully against the barrier while swearing abundantly. "We'll kill you! We'll fucking kill you!"

"Please go." Allen repeated. "We will take care of them."

"You'd better not die, brat." Cross snapped. "One last thing: the entrance of the Earl's hideout is at the top of the mountain. Your shikigami will have to dispel the protection that is concealing it. Once you get to him, don't even try to kill him. To defeat him, you'll have to seal him."

"Killing him would be better." Allen replied.

"Just try." Cross snickered before leaving to where the other Exorcists were.

Allen turned back to the twins and removed the barrier.

"Let's do this quickly, Kanda."

"Che, as if you needed to tell me that."

Kanda brought out his sword and rushed at the demons and slashed the bombs they were about to throw but missed their hands a by a hair's width. Then he frowned. Those spiritual energies... he was sure they felt familiar. It seemed that Allen felt the same for he asked right after:

"Kanda... I'm sure we never fought them before so why do I feel that I've met them somewhere?"

The demon didn't reply. Instead, he addressed the twins:

"Your names?" he asked.

"It's not a very nice way to ask, but we'll tell you anyway." And in unison, they declared proudly: "We are Jasdero and Debitto!"

"Nice to meet you." Allen replied, obviously not caring about their names that much. Without wasting more time, he bound them with the same spell he had used on Road. However, they were way more agile than Road and dodged the ropes pretty easily.

"Your energies are similar to Jasdevi's." Kanda said.

"Hehehe, guess we couldn't fool you. Right, well you know what? We are Jasdevi." Jasdero said with a dark grin. "Except that we are twice as strong as him since we are two now."

"What the hell is that crap?"

"We are Jasdevi. We have been sealed for ages by the Earl in the body of Jasdevi. But when you beat him down, he decided to wake us up. Easy, right?"

"Splitting yourself in two won't change the fact that I'll slay you once more. It'll double the fun." Kanda replied, smirking.

"Aren't we here to fight?" the other demon asked back. "Then let's fight instead of talking uselessly."

An explosion blew up the spot where the twins were standing a second ago, leaving a huge crater instead.

"Agreed." Allen replied.

"Y-you bastards..." The two demons had been sent flying a bit further away and a thin trail of dark blood could be seen on Debitto's forehead. "We'll beat the crap out of you!"

"You don't stand a chance." Kanda replied icily.

"Don't think a youkai who has turned into a human's puppet could beat us!" Jasdero spat out angrily as he stood up. "We'll get serious now..."

That said, the two youkai vanished.

"Let's play hide-and-seek, shall we?" Jasdero's voice echoed.

"Che, the concealed their energies, those bastards." Kanda muttered.

"Let's blow up the whole place then." Allen offered. "They must be somewhere nearby anyway."

Kanda glanced at the boy. He didn't know whether it was because of the curse or because he had decided to grow up a bit, but Allen had somehow changed from a coward kid to an Exorcist filled with assurance.

"It's because you're here with me, Kanda." Allen said out loud as if he had read Kanda's mind. The latter was surprised yet amused, and merely shrugged.

Allen erected a barrier right on time to avoid getting hit by several bombs, then murmured:

"No matter how powerful you are, you can't beat nine generations of knowledge. I can't let what my ancestors gave me go to waste."

He started chanting. Kanda was truly impressed by the amount of power that had been given to him, and even more impressed when knowing that the boy was controlling his energy by himself, without Kanda's help. It seems his ancestors didn't do their job half-heartedly after all.

The moment Allen withdrew the barrier, he cast another spell, sending a deflagration around the whole area and making the ground shake under the shock. Big rocks were cracked while the smaller ones smashed to pieces. The air was now filled with blessed energy floating and twirling, blown by a strong and invisible wind and soon enough, the cries of pain of Jasdero and Debitto were heard.

They reappeared, lying on the ground and coughing because of the energy particles they were inhaling and which were burning their lungs. As they raised their heads to look at Allen, their eyes filled with sheer hatred were sending him daggers.

"You damn... Exorcist... We're gonna... make you... pay!" Jasdero articulated between coughs.

"I could actually let you choke yourself to death." Allen commented calmly.

"Che, don't be stupid, brat." Kanda intervened as he walk to the two lying demons, his sword held firmly in his hand. "You pieces of trash can go sleep eternally." he said, raising his blade.

Two slashes were heard, and soon enough, only two people remained.

"Now it's the Earl's turn." Kanda said, turning his head to the summit. He started heading for the top, when Allen's coughing stopped him. He turned back to see the young Exorcist on his two knees and rather in pain. As he removed his hand from over his mouth, Kanda frowned as he saw blood staining it.

"Oi, you're alright?" he asked, walking back to his master.

"I'm fine..." Allen replied, taking his breath back. "I guess... it must be the side-effects of getting and using so much power in a single time." he added with a short, bitter laugh.

"Che, stop pushing yourself like that. I don't want to end up with a dead brat to drag."

"Is that concern I hear?" Allen asked as he wiped the blood off his mouth.

Kanda glared at him, visibly annoyed. Why he was bearing with Allen was still a mystery for him. Though seeing that stupid grin appearing on the boy's face pissed him off. He grabbed Allen's collar and pulled him roughly to him, pressing his lips against Allen's. He shoved his tongue in the boy's mouth despite the latter's protests – protests could go to hell – and claimed his mouth with a rare passion. When he pulled back and let go of Allen, he merely said, a faint smirk on his lips:

"You still had some blood on your mouth."

* * *

They soon arrived at the top of the mountain, and as planned, they saw nothing. However, they did feel the barrier Cross had mentioned, but Allen failed at breaking it. He frowned; even with the amount of power he had cumulated, he was unable to undo the spell? Then he remembered Cross mentioning that Kanda was probably able to do it.

"Kanda, you can break the barrier, can't you?" he asked.

"Of course I can. That level of spell is pitiful."

"That's not what I meant, Kanda. The way Cross had put it, it seemed that he was implying that you were the only one able to break it."

Kanda stiffened for half a second but Allen didn't miss it.

"I'm not the only one." he replied dryly.

"Well, I guess the Earl should be able to do it as well since he erected it but..."

"I don't mean the Earl. I actually doubt the Earl would be able to dispel the barrier. And I also doubt he was the one to erect it."

"Then who?" Allen insisted, now very intrigued.

The shikigami kept silent.

"Tell me. That's an order." the boy declared, which greatly annoyed Kanda.

"Stupid brat. This barrier is the one my clan used to protect the area." the youkai let out dryly. "Only those from my clan can create and destroy it."

"Your clan?" Allen asked incredulously. "But why would your clan protect this place?"

"Probably because we lived there?" Kanda snapped sarcastically, earning a dumbfounded stare from Allen.

"You lived there? Your clan? Here?"

Kanda shrugged.

"Then when you say the Earl didn't erect that barrier, you mean..."

"Let's go. We've wasted enough time like this."

Kanda held out his hand in front of him and touched the invisible barrier, then with a single word, he dispelled it. As soon as the protection fell down, the landscape changed. Instead of a rocky and desert ground, Allen saw a two huge trees, and between their trunks, a path which was sinking into a sort of cave.

"Is that... the entrance?" he asked. Instead of replying, Kanda merely walked forward towards the path. Allen hurried after him and they both entered the cave.

As soon as they passed the cave's entrance, the landscape changed again to reveal an immense room lit by several floating balls of green light. In the middle was a broken altar, soiled by dry blood and from which swirls of miasma were coming out profusely. And right in front of the altar was the Earl.

The latter turned round when he heard them coming, and gave them a broad yet eerie grin. Allen was surprised by the Earl's appearance. At first sight he didn't look that scary – save for that ugly smile plastered on his face. Small and round like a ball with sharp ears and tiny eyes, Allen hadn't imagined the source of his problems could be someone like this.

"Welcome, Kanda, young Exorcist." he greeted them with a sickly sweet voice. "Welcome to the Source of Origins. Well, it seems you decimated my whole family, you damn Exorcists." His tone had suddenly turned icy.

"Not yet." Kanda replied, smirking. "Let me kill you first then we'll be able to say your family was decimated."

"As arrogant as ever, I see. But Kanda, you seem to forget something: you are under the control of a _human._ A human! How despicable. Humans are weak and yet you were chained to one of those weaklings. I'd have died of shame for a long time if I had been you."

"Don't worry, you'll die now." Kanda replied as he drew out his sword.

Allen looked around the room for any hidden enemy. It seems they were alone. Very well.

"Kanda, let's put an end to this." he declared, ready to attack.

"Allen, young Allen. I'm pretty sure you don't want to do something foolish."

"Getting rid of you isn't foolish."

"I'm not talking about that." the Earl replied with false sweetness again. "Look here."

The Earl made a gesture towards one of the walls and the latter suddenly vanished to reveal another, darker room. Allen gasped when he saw what – or rather, who – was in the room.

Lying there unconscious were Lavi, Lenalee, Tiedoll, Nine and even Cross.

"I couldn't capture that beautiful Maria, it's a bit sad but never mind. Now, young Allen, will you still try to kill me even knowing that I could kill your companions before you even managed to make a move?"

Allen was immobile, not able to decide on what to do. He was so close to his goal and now his friends were lying there at the mercy of the Earl who could kill them at any time.

"Don't mind them." Kanda said dryly. "They are probably already dead anyway. Don't fall in his trap." However, Allen ignored him.

"What do you want?" he asked the Earl.

"Oi Moyashi! Did you hear what I said? It's useless to..."

"I'm the one to decide that, Kanda. Now, Earl, what do you want in exchange for their lives?"

Unexpectedly, the Earl burst into laughter.

"The great Kanda being told off by a mere brat, how unsightly. And you, young Allen, what do you think I want?"

"Just tell me already!" Allen snapped. He was in a pinch, and Kanda would probably rather let his companions die than rescue them.

"Kanda." the Earl replied. "Will you exchange your shikigami for your comrades?"

At those words, Kanda's eyes opened wide.

"Moyashi! Don't listen to him! It's the same trick he used on my previous master!" he exclaimed.

"What? What are you saying, Kanda?"

"That stupid man chose to save his friends and because of that, we missed the opportunity to defeat the damn Earl at that time. That's why he put that curse on you! He wanted to make sure you'd kill the Earl no matter what! But now that you've managed to control yourself, the curse is useless. But don't you dare make the same mistake as him!"

"Wh-But..." Allen was terribly confused. He knew he had to defeat the Earl and that he wasn't going to be given another chance, but at the same time...

"You're saying that I should let him kill them?"

"I told you they're already dead by now!"

"Now, now, Kanda. Don't go mistake the boy with yourself." the Earl interrupted them. "He, unlike you, has a caring heart and he worries about his friends. You, however, are a demon which has taken thousands of lives and deserves only the same punishment." He then addressed Allen again: "I'm offering you to save your dear friends while I take care of this horrible demon there which has certainly been the cause of countless problems for you. It doesn't sound that bad, does it?"

"Enough crap!" Kanda shouted as he rushed to the Earl, his sword ready to slash him.

"Kanda, stop!" Allen ordered.

The youkai froze on the spot, though his whole body was trembling with anger.

"What the hell are you thinking, Moyashi?" he asked, furious.

"I can't... I just can't let them die..." Allen stuttered.

"Use your brain a second! After you let that bastard kill me, do you think he'll really let you go save them?" Kanda raged. That made Allen flinch a bit.

"But..." he started tentatively.

"They're already dead! Leave them!"

"Hohoho, what a rebellious shikigami we have here." the Earl commented, amused. "But it seems your _master_ has already made his decision." he added, walking closer to Kanda. "Don't worry, I'll make your death as long and painful as possible."

"Screw that." Kanda replied, preparing his sword. "You'll be the one to die here."

However, the next second, ropes of light came out of the ground and immobilized him.

"Moyashi! What the hell do you think you're doing!" Kanda shouted, pulling on the ropes.

"We must save them first!" Allen replied desperately, running to his friends.

"They are DEAD! And you'll be the next one of his list, you idiot!"

"How sweet." the Earl merely commented. He approached his hand to Kanda's face and grabbed his chin to force him to look into his eyes. "This is delightful." He moved closer to Kanda and whispered at his ear: "It's sad you won't see me kill your dear master."

Kanda was pulling aggressively on his ties, but they wouldn't break. Fury rose in him; there was no way he was going to die like that, was there?

"Now, shall I start cutting off one of your arm as payback for Tyki-pon's one?" the Earl whispered again. He held out his hand on the side, and suddenly, a huge blade appeared floating in the air. The demon grabbed it and raised it above Kanda's shoulder.

"Moyashi, untie me!" Kanda shouted.

When Allen heard him, he stopped running and turned his head to where the two demons were standing. He gasped and quickly cast a spell to tie down the Earl as well, but the latter saw the attack coming and jumped aside. At that moment, Allen's heart was beating strongly enough for him to feel it against his chest. Who was he going to choose between his friends and Kanda? Under the rush of events, he could barely think clearly enough and the only thing that mattered to him was to save his friends. Because they were _humans_. And Kanda was a _demon_. If he had been able to think rationally, he'd have certainly agreed with Kanda, and set the Earl's defeat as his priority.

"Moyashi! I'll come and kill you if you don't untie me at once!" Kanda threatened. Again, if Allen had been able to think rationally, he'd have seen the absurd in Kanda's sentence, but the only thing that hit him was that Kanda was in danger and it was because of Allen's stupidity.

But it was too late to react. The Earl had his sword ready to cut off Kanda's arm, and Allen opened his mouth wide to let out a desperate cry.

The blade fell, and it was if time had frozen for a second in Allen's eyes. He saw the blade getting closer and closer to Kanda's arm but his own arms were too slow to move in time to dispel the bonds that were tying his shikigami.

And two inches before the sword came in contact with the skin, the Earl's arm stopped. Allen looked at the demon's face and saw that his eyes were wide open, and filled with pain. The Earl looked down at his chest, making Allen's eyes do the same.

In the middle of the chest was the tip of a sword, tainted with blood. Allen looked right behind the Earl and to his utmost surprise, he saw that the one wielding the sword was definitely the least expected person.

"Kanrou..." Kanda murmured, obviously not expecting that face either. He reacted more quickly than Allen though, as he shouted again at the boy: "Untie me, Moyashi!"

This time, Allen complied immediately and he undid the spell binding Kanda. The sight of the injured demon seemed to wake him up and he forgot his friends for a second. Now was the time to erase the Earl's existence definitely. He started gathering all energy he could, drawing all the power he could from the knowledge his ancestors had forced in him.

Meanwhile, Kanda stepped back from the Earl who still didn't seem to realize what had just happened. Then slowly, a smirk appeared on his face as blood trailed down his mouth.

"I guess your blood was stronger than your will to have him dead after all, Kanrou." he said, coughing out blood.

"You're completely wrong, Earl." Kanrou replied, withdrawing his sword. The Earl stumbled a bit, coughing again. "The one who will kill him is _me_, not you."

"Unfortunately for you, I cannot be killed so easily." the demon added. As he turned round to face Kanrou, the wound on his chest could be seen slowly closing. "A demon of your level can't possibly kill me." he sneered.

At that moment, he choked again as a second blade sank in him. Kanda's blade. The only reaction he got from the Earl was another sneer.

"I told you that demons of your level can't possibly kill me! What do you hope to achieve with your petty attacks?"

"Demons of our level, maybe not, but what about nine generations of Exorcists all gathered in one?"

"What do you mean?" the Earl asked.

The answer came by itself, as Allen appeared at the side of Kanrou, facing the Earl, an enormous sword made of sheer concentrated energy in his hand. His hair had become even more tainted by golden, and his eyes were now as clear and bright as crystal. An impressive luminous aura was surrounding him, reminding Kanda of when his curse would take over him. The only difference is that Allen was now able to control the power given to him.

Kanda could feel the amount of energy emanating from the boy's body, and for a second, couldn't help but truly admire that a mere human could contain that much power.

"In this blade dwell nine generations of knowledge built in the sole purpose of defeating you." he declared ceremoniously.

And for the first time, he saw fear in the Earl's eyes.

"This time, you won't simply be sealed. I'll put an end to your existence on this world." Allen said, raising the sword above his head. The blade was wrapped with intense light, and it seemed to Kanda that it was blessed light which could exorcise any kind of evil it touched. The whole room was bathed in that light, and the last word Allen could hear from the Earl was:

"Humans... are interesting."

Kanda hid his eyes with his sleeves, dazzled by the light, and when he looked again, the room had returned to its original state.

Allen was standing there, breathing heavily and visibly trying to recover from the overuse of his energy. He stumbled a bit but was quickly caught by Kanda who put him down on the ground gently.

"How touching."

Kanrou's cold voice reminded Kanda that there was still an enemy left.

"And how disgusting." His twin added, looking at Allen. "A human. A _human_ managed to finish off one of the most powerful demons of the world. I can't believe it."

"So, where have you been all this time, Kanrou?" Kanda asked, completely ignoring his brother's remark.

"Just waiting for the right time to come, my dear brother."

"Che, let's finish this quickly then."

"Oh no, not yet. Let's wait a little longer." Kanrou said.

"What?"

"You see this?" the demon went on, pointing at the broken altar. "It's the Source of Origins. You know what it is? It is basically the cause of the whole mess among the youkai. And the closer to this place you are, the more affected you are." he added, a gloomy smile forming on his lips.

"What's your point?" Kanda asked dryly.

"My point is that it won't be long before you go completely berserk too."

"It'll be the same for you."

"Oh, pretending to be on the Earl's side had some advantages, including the one of getting a special protection against this." Kanrou said casually.

"Unfortunately for you, I don't plan to wait."

Without waiting any more, Kanda charged on his brother who parried the attack with his own sword.

"Be careful not to kill the boy accidentally." the latter said, smirking. "It'd be awful if you were to die now. I want to see you go crazy."

"I'll kill you before you have the chance to see it."

However, as Kanda pronounced those words, he started feeling something weird in him. He didn't know what it was, but it was truly unpleasant. Kanrou seemed to have noticed it as he said, visibly satisfied:

"Starting to feel the effects?"

"Not even in a thousand years." Kanda snapped back. But reality was proving him wrong. The nauseating air emanating from the altar was giving him a headache – if it could be called a headache – and his mind started feeling dizzy. His blood was boiling inside him, telling him more and more loudly to kill, kill and kill again. He ignored it at first, focusing on Kanrou who was facing him, yet he was having more and more trouble controlling his own movements.

"Come on, don't resist. It's useless and you know it." Kanrou repeated.

"What's so interesting in seeing me go berserk?" Kanda finally asked, irritated.

"I want to see you kill your own master. And when you do, I'll put the protection on you for you to turn back to normal, just in time for you to realize what you did before you die, your mind devoured by shame and rage. Sounds nice, doesn't it?"

"You're the one who lost your mind." Kanda spat out.

"Kan...da..."

It was Allen. The boy had woken up and was now looking at the two siblings fighting against each other.

"Moyashi get out of here." Kanda ordered.

"No, I'll help you..."

"You're in no shape for that." the youkai replied, still focusing on Kanrou. "Move out."

"I... can..."

"You two are annoying." Kanrou snapped, then walked to Allen and kicked him in the stomach and sent him flying a few meters away. "Now we'll have some peace."

"You..." Kanda started but was interrupted again by his twin:

"No time for delicacy, Kanda."

Said Kanda swore and parried the attack that came at him. He chased after Kanrou who had jumped back farther away, ready to defend. It was only after he reached the spot that he cursed himself mentally. Kanrou had brought him right next to altar and the uneasiness he was feeling got worse all of a sudden.

"Feeling well, Kanda?" the other asked sarcastically. "Come on, I kind of miss it how you used to act like a real demon, killing and wiping off anything on your way without any hesitation."

"You'll be part of those who'll get killed." Kanda replied with a cocky smile. The hand holding his sword tremble and Kanda suddenly felt the urge to tear his opponent to pieces. He was being affected more quickly than he had expected.

There was no time to be wasted anymore.

* * *

When Allen opened his eyes, he blinked and winced as his stomach hurt him quite a lot. He managed to see two vague silhouettes moving around and could hear the sound of swords clashing against each other.

He sat up and looked more closely and gasped. Kanda looked... in pain? And what were... those frantic movements he had, acting like a wild creature trying to catch its prey? And that look on his face... On the other hand, Kanrou looked perfectly happy and his next words petrified Allen:

"You can barely resist now. Come on, just get wild and kill your master. His human smell is very tempting, isn't it? Look, he woke up!" the demon then laughed, but it was a very sinister laugh.

"Shut up!" Kanda shouted, charging at his twin with more fury than ever.

Allen had no idea what to do. He had used up most of his energy to kill the Earl. Then he remembered that the other Exorcists were still there, and he crawled up to them. Maybe he could at least do something for them.

When he saw Nine's state, he bit his lip. It was miraculous she was still alive. He checked on the others who were still breathing, which made him sigh of relief. They weren't dead after all. However, the relief didn't last long.

A horrible roar echoed in the room, making the walls tremble. When Allen turned back, no word could come out of his mouth. It wasn't Kanda who was standing over there anymore, it was... something like a cross a wolf and a fox, with the size of an elephant. It was completely black, save for a white mark on the forehead and two scarlet eyes. The beast was fury and its tail was particularly long. The same for its fangs and claws.

"Kan...da?" Allen murmured, unable to believe his eyes.

"That's right, Kanda. Now look at the humans over there, just waiting for you to devour them!" Kanrou addressed the beast with obvious satisfaction.

So that was his true form, wasn't it? Allen could simply not move. The amount of spiritual energy Kanda was emitting was terrifying, even compared with the amount Allen was used to feeling. The beast roared again, whipping its tail in the air and bearing its monstrous fangs. Then it turned its head towards the lot of Exorcists and stared straight into Allen's eyes. The boy gulped and waited. What else could he do?

As Kanda stepped closer, Allen finally managed to speak:

"Kanda! It's me, Allen! Don't you recognize me? Kanda!"

Kanda kept moving closer, growling and with obvious intent to kill in his eyes. Allen cursed himself for having spent all his energy on the Earl earlier. Next to him, he felt someone moving and when he looked back, he saw Tiedoll, Cross, Lavi and Lenalee waking up with some difficulty.

"What the hell... is that energy I'm feeling?" Tiedoll asked, sitting up. He then raised his eyes to Kanda and opened his eyes wide. The three others Exorcists imitated him and Lenalee almost screamed as she clung to Lavi in horror.

"It's Kanda." Allen replied gloomily. "And he's about to kill us."

As Kanda was coming closer, Allen could feel something pulsing in him, like an energy which wasn't his. And he identified it pretty quickly: it was the traces of Kanda's energy which was answering to Kanda.

"Go, Kanda! Kill them!" Kanrou was laughing hysterically.

"That annoying bastard..." Cross muttered.

"That's truly Kanda?" Tiedoll asked, more surprised than scared. "Allen, that's your shikigami, you should be able to control him, am I wrong?"

Allen looked at the old man stupidly.

"There's no way I ca-"

And then it clicked. Why hadn't he thought of that earlier? He didn't know if it was going to work, but he had nothing to lose now. If he had Kanda's energy in him, maybe he could try to force him to come back to his senses. He shut his eyes tight and concentrated on the flow of Kanda's energy in him which kept pulsing more and more quickly in him. _'Kanda'_ he thought, _'Kanda, Kanda, come back to us.'_

Next to him, he could hear Lenalee screaming and felt the ground tremble as Kanda's paw landed on it. He was close, very close. Allen could feel Kanda's energy but couldn't grasp it like he would have wanted to. He focused more, completely ignoring anything else around him.

He could hear his heartbeat very clearly, and tried to imagine the flow of energy in him. He imagined it was his own, and he imagined forcing it to calm down. There was nothing else but him, and blackness. No sound except that of his heart, no light, nothing. Just Allen.

It was like a wild river with strong currents ravaging anything on its way. Allen had to stop the currents. He concentrated even more, using his sheer will to force the stream to slow down. It resisted him but he didn't give up. He could feel he was getting very close and he wasn't going to give up just now.

_Just a bit more, Kanda._

_You can turn back to your normal self._

_Come on, Kanda._

_Calm down._

_You're powerful enough to resist._

_..._

"Kanda!" Allen shouted at the same time as Kanda roared even louder. The beast howled like a wolf, stretching its neck and stomping the ground with one paw, like an animal in pain. When it finally cooled down, it was panting heavily and still growling, its eyes fixed on Allen.

"Kanda..."

Behind him, Kanrou was frowning, understanding that there was something wrong.

"What are you waiting for? Get them!" he shouted angrily, but the last thing he expected was to see Kanda turn back to him and open its mouth wide before closing it again on Kanrou. The tips of the fangs were sinking in the demon's skin and the latter let out a cry of pain. Kanda then sent him flying violently against the wall, and the sinister sound of bones cracking was heard.

Kanrou's limp body fell on the ground and he didn't get up anymore. Kanda looked at the corpse, still growling, and snapped it up before swallowing it in one gulp.

Then, slowly, the huge beast's size started receding and its limb started changing shape. In a matter of seconds, Kanda had recovered his human form and was now lying on the ground, panting and sweating, pain written all over his face.

Allen rushed to him.

"Kanda! Kanda, hang in there! Kanda!"

He knelt down by his side and pushed a few strands of hair away from Kanda's face, then lifted up his shoulders and wrapped an arm behind his back to support him.

"The altar..." Kanda articulated. "Purify it..."

"Huh?"

"This sacred altar has been defiled." Cross said behind Allen. He along with Tiedoll, Lavi and Lenalee had moved from their place and were now also standing by Allen. "It needs to be purified. We need priests for that, but I'll see what I can do. You guys should move Kanda out of this place. And don't forget Nine either."

The three remaining Exorcists nodded, and helped Allen carry Kanda and Nince out of there. They put them down outside the cave and waited for Cross to come out. Meanwhile, Tiedoll asked Allen:

"How did you manage to defeat the Earl by the way?"

"Yeah! You didn't tell us, Allen!" Lavi exclaimed. "We wanna hear the story!"

"Hm well, I..." Allen started speaking, slightly embarrassed. "Well actually it was Kanrou who injured him first, then Kanda, then I just finished him off." he explained humbly.

"This story sounds overly simplified." Lavi said, suspicious.

"It's the truth!" Allen insisted.

"Whatever, whatever..."

Cross went out of the cave a few minutes later.

"I put a temporary seal but we'll have to send priests there to fix everything back to normal. And from now on, this place will have to be guarded too." he said.

He raised his head to the sky; it was early morning and the sky was getting clear. He looked back at the other Exorcists and crossed his arms:

"It's not really time to lazy around here, you know? Komui is waiting for our report." he said.

* * *

_**A cookie if you find the reference to Tales of Vesperia. Lol.**_


	28. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

"Brother! Hurry up, you're going to be late!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming!"

Komui hurriedly put the pile of papers away, stood up and dust off his robe. Then he walked round the low table and followed Lenalee outside.

The weather was fine, a faint breeze allowed the temperature to be bearable. All the gardens of the temple were covered with flowers of many colours, and all the trees were as green as ever. Komui breathed in the fresh air and smiled. It was really a good day. He turned to Lenalee:

"So it's been two years already, huh?"

The girl nodded, a faint smile on her lips as she looked towards the forest.

"Let's go, the others are waiting for us." She said, pulling Komui's sleeve. Indeed, a bit farther away, Lavi were waving at them; next to him were standing Tiedoll, Nine, Cross and a few others. As the siblings arrived, Cross snickered:

"You like making us wait, Komui."

"Sorry sorry, I was a bit busy, but let's go now."

The group of Exorcists exited the temple and walked towards the forest, led by Lavi and Lenalee, who was carrying some flowers with her. As they walked deeper through the trees, they could hear the sounds of many youkai living their own lives, completely oblivious of the humans' presence. Birds were flying from one tree to another, sometimes a furtive silhouette could be seen crossing the path quickly and disappear under a bush; the forest was as living as ever.

The Exorcists followed the path deeper and deeper, until they reached a clearing. In the middle of that clearing was an erected stone.

"We've arrived, Allen." Lenalee murmured.

The Exorcists placed themselves around the stone and Lenalee stepped forward. She knelt down in front of the stone and put the flowers on the grass. Then she stood up and took a deep inspiration.

"My dear friends," she started, "It's been two years since Allen left us and went back to his ancestors..."

* * *

_The war was really over._

_Now the whole country was buzzing around to rebuild everything that had been destroyed by the youkai._

_At the temple, life resumed as best as possible. Injuries were healed, mostly and new apprentices kept coming to the temple to become Exorcists. None of them noticed that one Exorcist was missing._

_Far from there, somewhere in the forest, a certain silver-headed was sitting comfortable in a certain demon's lap, eyes closed. He wasn't sleeping though._

"_Kanda..." the boy murmured. He received no answer, but he knew that the said Kanda was listening. "I'm feeling tired."_

_The demon didn't reply. He knew it. He knew that life was escaping from the boy's body, body which had been too strained by power. Too strained by a curse. Because Kanda knew, he didn't feel the need to reply. He didn't resist when Allen moved up and put his lips close to his own; on the contrary, he even leant down and accepted the kiss with no struggle._

_For some reason, he realized that the boy's warmth against him had become something necessary to him. He tightened his embrace around the Exorcist, to feel more of that warmth, more of those lips, more of him._

_Hours passed, the two of them hadn't separated even for one second. When Kanda looked at Allen, he noticed the boy's face getting paler and paler. His breathing had started slowing down too._

_Damn power._

"_Kanda..." Allen called once again, "I'm feeling tired..."_

_Silence._

"_What will do you after?"_

_The demon didn't need to ask after what. He shrugged._

"_Don't bother about that."_

"_You'll come and visit me sometimes?"_

"_Che."_

_Silence._

"_Kanda..."_

_Silence._

"_I'm tired... I think I'll rest for a while."_

_Silence. For good._

_Kanda didn't let go of Allen's body, even when the sky had turned pitch black. They were in a clearing bathed by moonlight, and the reflects on Allen's hair made them look like real silver. _

_Kanda kissed those lips one last time and laid the body carefully on the soft grass._

_The following day, an erected stone would take its place._

* * *

"... always remember you. And I'm sure Kanda must come around here pretty often. If you ever happen to see him, say hello to him for us, Allen."

Lenalee had finished talking and raised her eyes to the other people around her. They were silent, but they didn't look sad. It was a fine day after all.

Later on, as they all left the place, Lenalee caught some movements in the trees in the corner of her eyes. When she turned her head to that direction, the last thing she saw was a cascade of dark hair and a long piece of black cloth disappearing in the depths of the forest.

She smiled.

* * *

**_And the story is finally finished! Thank you for sticking with me till the end :) I hope you enjoyed your read. I'll use this opportunity to announce that this fic will conclude all my Yullen fics. I feel that I can't write that pairing well enough for you readers anymore, and I won't try to force any inspiration out. Thank you for reading!_**


	29. Ad vitam aeternam

**Disclaimer: not mine.  
**

* * *

**Ad vitam æternam**

_1629, Japan_

He wasn't one to have many friends. In fact, he had none. But neither did he have foes, which was good enough for him. The villagers were kind towards him, a poor orphan of fifteen who had learnt to struggle his way through this world; yet no one had ever tried to get closer to him. Perhaps it was because of the faint smile that always painted his lips, a smile which seemed to bear perpetual sadness; perhaps it was his large ash grey eyes constantly gazing with melancholy at his surroundings; perhaps it was the way he would always reply politely yet distantly to anyone addressing him. Perhaps it was the scar on his left eye.

Those who were ill-tongued argued that he was probably the son of some foreigner whore, which would explain his chestnut hair. The boy didn't mind, though. As long as no one troubled him, he kept on living.

If someone asked him why he always looked sad even though he wasn't unhappy, he would merely shrug and shake his head, saying that he didn't know. Which was true. The only thing he knew was that there was a faint yet ever present feeling at the back of his mind, whispering ceaselessly to him about things he couldn't comprehend, things that seemed to talk about another era, about something that wasn't here anymore while it should have been. He had never been able to grasp the nature of what always made him feel so... incomplete, as if something was missing. He thought it was blurry memories of his childhood, at that time when he still had a mother and a father whom he couldn't even put a face on. As he had never been able to dismiss the latent feeling, he had learnt to live with it.

There were ruins of an old temple, near the village. From what remained, it could be easily deduced that it was once a rich and important temple to train Exorcists, but that was most certainly centuries ago. Now all the main temples were located in the capital city. Not that the boy cared. What he liked was the forest next to the ruins.

There was a path which he often took – even if he was the only one in the village – for the mere pleasure of walking and listening to birds singing or filling his nose with the scent of pine and resin. At the end of the path was a clearing, and in the middle of the clearing was a stone that had probably been erected there a long time ago. It was partly covered with moss, flowers and tall grass but somehow the stone itself was still a pure white. From the way it was shaped, the boy believed it was a sort of tombstone, even though he had no idea why someone would be buried there.

Again, it was really none of his concern what the stone was. He simply liked the place for an even more simply reason: no one ever walked by that area and he could stay hours among the trees, quietly and peacefully daydreaming. Also, laying on the grass and closing his eyes always left him with a remote sensation of nostalgia, a fluttering feeling that would strangely always soothe his spirit to rest, making him forget for a while the constant emptiness that filled him.

Today wasn't different from any other day, and the grass felt soft and wet under his fingers. There were the usual sounds of leaves bristling, birds chirping, animals passing furtively in the far... Not today.

The boy opened his eyes, frowning. Today, the sound was much closer. Something moved briefly in the trees, in the shadows of the foliage. Then nothing. He waited a minute, then two, then three, and as nothing else happened, he assumed that it was only the wind. But it had troubled his quiet routine.

Standing up, he dusted his trousers off and prepared to go back to the village.

He felt a movement behind him.

Turned round.

And gasped.

Swirls of silk darker than night veiled his vision.

Long, ebony hair fell slowly over gracious yet strong shoulders.

Confused silver eyes plunged into deep cobalt ones.

Time shattered.

Went back six hundred years ago.

Long lost memories swept over him like a hurricane, pouring down like a strong stream in the boy's gaping mind.

He understood.

The melancholy.

The nostalgia.

The emptiness.

They were no more.

He opened his mouth.

Uttered a single name.

How did he know that name? He had no idea.

Did it matter? Of course it didn't.

What mattered was that, even in his troubled state, he knew that the stranger standing in front of him, barely a few inches from him, was someone very significant to him.

Maybe in another life, in another era, but it wasn't important.

There was a smirk, and suddenly tears ran down the boy's cheeks, uncontrollably, but they weren't tears of grief. Far from that.

Before he even knew it, he found himself held tightly by protective arms against a foreign yet so familiar chest. A pair of lips claimed his as if to make up for the eternity that had elapsed.

_You're back, finally._

* * *

**A/N: No, this isn't a hallucination. It's the final chapter of Shikigami. Like, the real final one. After the epilogue. You'll have to thank Altalia for it. 'Cos I wrote this mainly to advertise for the doujin she's working on, which is a doujin based on my story. So if you liked this fic, you may want to try the doujin and give her tons of love for starting such an insane project. Find the link in my profile.**

**I also wrote it because I was getting pretty tired of some flame-PM I received (yes, even now) saying the epilogue was s***. You have the right to dislike it, but I have the right to be addressed on a more polite tone.  
**

**So, hope you'll give Altalia a lot of support!  
**


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